AN: Even though only one person reviewed, I'm still gonna post...

Why hath thou spurned me, o reviewers? Hath I offended thine fair selves?

As Ingrid walked through the halls to her next class, she contemplated Ashlynn and Hunter's newly-discovered relationship. She'd figured out they were dating from hearing them talk to each other - really, how did anyone miss it - but knowing they did it with everyone watching? That took guts, and it awed her to no end. I couldn't even introduce myself as me when I came here, she thought to herself with a frown.

"-I just wind up and-!" There was a loud splattering noise, and when Ingrid looked toward the source of the sound, she saw Hopper licking cake away from around his lips as Cupid and Briar smiled widely at Headmaster Grimm. Ingrid froze up a bit at the sight of the Headmaster, whom she worried would call her out at any time. Sure, it didn't seem like he knew at that moment, but anything could happen, really. Once he was gone, she ran to Hopper, who was swiping at the cake on his eyes.

"Oh man, are you ok?" Hopper perked up and searched blindly at the sound of her voice.

"Greta?" Ingrid winced, newly aware of the use of her friend's name.

"Yeah, it's me," she said. "Are you alright, Hopper?" His mouth, the only part of his face not coated in cake, turned up in a smile.

"I'm alright, thanks." Ingrid stared at the cake bits on his face, which looked delicious. To avoid eating the cake regardless of where it had been, a bad habit she'd had since childhood, she instead stared at Hopper's mouth, and strangely enough faced the same problem. What in the-? She cleared her throat noisily.

"Um, would you maybe like the face-cake removed?" Hopper nodded, splattering more cake on to the floor. Ingrid looked around the empty hallway several times before using her misty green magic to peel away the cake and reconstruct the two and a half slices that hadn't either fallen to the floor or been eaten. No reason to waste it, she thought, rationalizing her impulse to eat the icing-covered heart. As she removed the last of the cake from his eyes, Hopper blushed.

"Sorry about that, I think I just made you late for class." Ingrid smiled and took a bite of the cake. Chocolate icing, strawberry cake. Nice.

It's okay, I don't mind. It was for a good reason, I'm sure coach will understand that I had to save an innocent cake from your ravenous appetite." Hopper chuckled as Ingrid took another bite of cake.

"Speaking of ravenous appetites, how'd you get one of the cakes?" Ingrid's eyes widened as she panicked for an answer. Hopper's hands flew to his hair. "I- I mean, not that you eat a lot- but I... I just-" With a poof Hopper turned into a frog. Ingrid giggled and scooped her friend up off of the floor.

"It's okay, Hopper. I got some from Cupid." She kissed him on the cheek and quickly took a bite of cake. "So, what's all this cake for, anyway?" Hopper glanced around, then leaned in close to her ear.

"Cupid and Briar are hosting a secret True Hearts Day party." Ingrid's eyes widened.

"Isn't that holiday banned?"

"Yeah, but Cupid and Briar are going all out anyway! It's so brave..." Ingrid looked up at her friend's awed expression, and felt tears prick at her eyes.

"Yeah..."

As Ingrid climbed into her bed that night, she turned to face her roommate.

"Greta, am I a coward?"

"What? No! Who said you were?!" Ingrid shook her head as she clung tighter to her teddy bear.

"No one. There are times when I just feel like one." Greta sat down on her friend's bed and wrapped her arms around Ingrid.

"You are not a coward. You spent years dealing with prejudice and cruelty, and you never once wished ill on any of those little shits."

"Greta-"

"No, I'm sorry, but that's what they are!" Ingrid chuckled. "You are the sweetest girl I've ever known, and if Hopper can't ask you out himself, then he doesn't deserve to have you ask him." Ingrid pulled away from her friend, blushing furiously.

"What? That's not what I was talking about at all!"

"Oh. Really?"

"Really," Ingrid squeaked, clutching a pillow to her and hiding behind it. "I meant not coming here under my real name!"

"Oh." Greta laughed. "So you two are still in denial?" Ingrid shot an exasperated look.

"Not in denial, Greta," she said, repeating herself for what seemed like the millionth time. "Don't like him that way."

"Yes you dooooooooo!" Greta poked her friend's ticklish sides around her pillow as she teased Ingrid. "You wanna smooch him and make little froggy babies with him and eat candy offa him foreverrrrrrr!" Ingrid squealed as her friend tickled her.

"O... oh... ok-k-kay! Okay I do," she cried as she gasped for breath and attempted to squirm away from her friend. "I doooooo!" Greta stopped tickling her abruptly and smiled like Kitty. Ingrid, however, curled around her pillow and sniffled. Greta's smile dropped.

"Wait, Ingy what's wrong?"

"He loves Briar," she said as she wiped at her cheeks. "He loves her so much... 'cause she's so brave and beautiful and I'm... I'm just little chicken me." Greta hugged her friend tightly.

"You are brave, Ingy. You've climbed to the top of your house without a foothold to get at the chocolate shingles, you've faced the Royals at this school every day even though they'd flip their crowns if they ever found out you're not me, and you've faced down the most hateful people in our old hometown with a smile. You're kind and sweet and brave and pretty and Hopper needs to get his crap together so bad right now, I can't even say." Ingrid chuckled.

"Thanks, Grets." Greta held her friend tighter.

"Of course."

A few rooms down, Kitty Cheshire couldn't choose between laughing or purring. She had never felt so lucky, as she did that morning in the hallway. Invisible, she had watched 'Greta' and Hopper's sickening little exchange. She was this close to coughing up either a hairball or her breakfast - she wasn't really sure - in disgust, until she saw thin, green mist not only wiping cleanly away the cake on Hopper's face, but reconstructing it. The rest of the day had been wonderful, but hearing 'Ingrid' and 'Greta talk before she'd teleported away had been the stuff of fairytales for Kitty. Now, she had the privilege of planning the most destructive and chaotic way to unleash Ingrid's secret on the world.

This is going to be so fun.

AN: I saw all three parts to the True Hearts Day arc, and I'm so happy Hopper got lines! Also happy Briar was somewhat nice to him at the end, even if she and the other girls just kinda let him stew in the punch bowl. Also, DAMNIT LIZZIE HEARTS WE COULDA SOLVED EVERYTHING IF YOU WEREN'T SO GREEDY WITH HEART-RELATED THINGS! WHY YOU DO DIS?

Originally, Apple was gonna end up being the villain of this, but she proved herself to be a sweetie at the end of the True Hearts arc so she won't be a bee-itch muffin here.