Sorry it took me so long to get this chap up!! I've been having a MAJOR writers block!! But, I finally thought of something, sooooo, I hope you like it!!!

Please review to tell me how you liked it!!!!!

Everything was sore the next day. And that fall with Gaara didn't help any. Kyra tried to get her to stay home, but she said that Tsunade had medicen that would make it feel better, plus, she didn't want to miss any training. Sakura walked to the bus stop with the twins, Gaara and his family were already there, Naruto was walking up the street with Ramen noddles in his hand.

Sakura smiled at her friend, it was so Naruto.

The sky was clear, all blue, not a single cloud in the sky. The breeze was chilly, but not enough to have a big heavy coat on. Sakura was in a light t-shirt, the cold not bothering her skin. She could be out in a snow storm in dead winter, and the cold would bearly effect her. Gaara had a black zip-up sweatshirt on over a black shirt with a red fist in the middle. Today was a special day at school, they were spending the whole day on their teams. Sakura didn't look at Gaara more then she had to, bearly talked to anyone.

Sakura did as she was told today, nothing extra. Tsunade had fully healed her, but she didn't want to over do it. Her sisters looked at her oddly as they walked back to the busses after they got done with Iruka-sensei for the day. They had noticed Sakura's odd behavior and were worried for her.

Weeks passed like this. Sakura bearly talked, and never did more then she was told. Something had happened, but no one knew what. Everyone finally dicided to give the pink haired girl some room to think, let her go to them on her own.

Sakura's head swimmed with the night that was so long ago. After Temari and Gaara had left, her dad showed up to get the twins. Sakura refused to let them go with him alone, so went also.

She had never been violated in such a way ever in her life...

XX

It was dark. Night time. Sakura climbed out her bedroom window and carefully climbed up to the roof. She couldn't deal with the thoughts, she needed to clear her head. The moon and stars usually helped. The shingles were cold under her bear feet, but Sakura paid no heed to them as she walked over to the end of the building, where she would have the best view of the city and the sky. Two in one. The cold breeze made her shiver, but also swept away some of the pictures that lingered in her mind. The awful memorys that she begged to be forgotten. Sakura pulled her hair into a loose pony tail on the side of her head, she wanted to be able to see and not have it whipping her in the face with the wind.

Sakura crossed her legs and looked over the sleeping city, everything seemed so calm. Not a care in the world. Lies. All of it. Nothing was ever what it seemed. Happiness was a joke. Not real. It was for little kids who didn't understand what pain was. Who lived a joyous life until reality smashed them back down to earth. Sakura had never had that kind of life. She had learned from the beginning that it was all lies. Everything people told you about the life of an teenager/adult. They said you had bad times, it was worse, good times, it was a lie. You would meet friends that you could trust for life in high school, lie. You could never trust anybody in this world. No one. Not even your cat or dog. Lies. All of it. No one cared about you. Not one. They pretended, sure, but like I said, lies. Everything that you learn about the "real life" Was a lie. None of it was good and happy. None of it was bad or crappy, it was worse. Far worse then anyone made it out to be. Nothing someone smart would want. Nothing someone stupid would be stupid enough to believe.

An ice cold wind gusted around Sakura, her hair flying from its elastic.

You see people smiling everyday. People laughing together, singing, dancing, people in love. They used those around them to make them feel better. They fed off of other people to lift themselves up. It doesn't work. That just shows how weak you truly are. Needing others to stay strong. Those kind of people are the ones Sakura hated most. The ones who depended on others. People who hurt those around them to make themselves feel better. People who liked seeing others in pain.

A small tear rolled from the corner of her dull green eye.

The pain was so much, having to deal with this. It hurt every second of the day. Not just the physical pain, but the mental pain as well. It hurt even more when her friends asked if she was ok, when they smiled and told her what ever it was that it was ok. It wasn't ok. None of it was. The smiles, laughter, it was like knives stabbing her over and over and over with out resting. How could they act so well? How could they go about like nothing in the world was wrong? Like no one ever lied to them?

Movment in the street caught her eye. A girl and boy from the school were walking hand in hand, in the middle of the night. The girl looked up at him like she truely trusted him. Like there wasn't anything in the world but him. He looked back at her with the same eyes, slowly leaning down to kiss her.

It hit Sakura like a ten ton weight falling from the sky and smacking her flat in the face.

Others didn't see the world like she did. They didn't understand yet. They didn't know all the lies like she did, they were still in those happy-go-lucky days. Nothing happened to them like it did Sakura. Everything was different to them. Realization hadn't come to them yet. But it would, and it would hurt. She felt lucky that she had known for years.

Another movment caught her attention, but her eyes did not move from the couple slowly walking down the street. Sakura didn't care who was coming up behind her, friend or foe. Once they disappeared around the corner, Sakura's eyes moved back up to the sky, not once looking in the direction of her visiter. She didn't care, as long as they left her alone.

The minutes slowly passed, not one of the two on the roof made a sound. Eyes watched Sakura's every movement, not wanting her to fall off the roof and get hurt. The face around the eyes was blank. Not showing the real consern that was sealed in the jade eyes.

Gaara slowly, and quietly, sat next to Sakura, a foot away. He finally looked away and up to the sky.

It was a clear night, only a few whisps of clouds remaind to shade the moon. The stars were bright, but not out shining the great moon. The wind died down, and only their shallow breathing could be heard. Sakura sniffed and wiped her eyes, realizing that the tears had not stopped. Gaara must have thought she was such a weakling, not being able to hold everything in.

She risked a glance over at him, he was looking back at her, confusion deep in his eyes. Eyes that had been in all of Sakura's dreams, all of her good ones. The ones that happened very celdom conpaired to the raging nightmares that marked her every other time she shut her eyes. Those eyes have saved her more then once, and yet, they never knew. Gaara was the first to look away, up to the sky. Sakura's eyes fell to the space between them, not knowing what to do. She hadn't expected it to be him that was here on the roof with her.

"We leave tomorrow." Gaara's soft, yet rough, voice broke the silence, his eyes back to looking at her.

"Huh?" Sakura met his eyes, dazed from waking up so quickly from her daydream.

"Our first mission is tomorrow. You should get some sleep, you'll need it." His voice was quieter then before, seeing the dazed confusion on her face.

"Oh... Yeah, that. Um... What time do we leave?" Sakura started getting to her feet, but her bear foot slipped, warm strong handes reached out and caught her before she could hit the shingles. Sakura stared up into Gaara's eyes.

"Five. I'll wait for you in the hall."

"Ok..." Sakura let her voice trail off as she sat back down on the cold roof. She didn't want to go back to her room, to her nightmares, her fears. She looked back up at the sky.

"You should go back to sleep." He whispered, sitting back down himself.

"I can't." Sakura whispered back, not looking over at him.

"Can't, or wont?"

"... Both." Sakura finally met his eyes, she could feel that her face was blank, as blank as his, but her eyes betrayed her. They always did, just like Gaara's did to him. Gaara seemed to see the fear, and nodded, leaning back on his hands.

Sakura sighed with relief and laid back on the cold roof. She watched Gaara watch the sky. She felt peaceful around him, though most didn't. Gaara was supossed to be a killer, the one you ran from. Sakura was oddly comferted by it. By the safe feeling she felt when she was around him. She sighed and closed her eyes. She was no better then the rest. Feeding off Gaara to feel better. She rolled to her side and was asleep instently, not noticing the pair of eyes that watched her...

XX

Everything was quiet when Sakura woke. She wasn't cold anymore, she was warm. Her eyes slowly opened and looked around. She was back in her room. A sigh left her lips as she realized Gaara must have carried her back. She didn't like that she had used him like that last night. She felt horrable. Yet, it was so nice to get a full nights sleep, or al least sleeping without dreaming for a change. She glanced at her clock, there was a note stuck on it.

I'll wait in the hall.

5:30

Gaara had left her a note. She glanced at her clock, it was 4:30... Crap! She quickly jumped out of her bed and ran into her bathroom, turning on the water. The "Field trip" they she was going on was going to take all weekend, if not more. Tsunade had already reassured Kyra that's what Sakura was going to be doing. Kyra didn't want Sakura to leave, but knew it was better not to argue, she would go anyway. It took a half hour for Sakura to get out of the shower. Another fifteen minutes to blowdry her hair. five minutes to brush it and put on her make-up. Great. ten minutes left to pack for the weekend.

Sakura dug under her bed and grabbed her backpack, the one she used for the hiking trips she used to go on with Danielle and Danielle's aunt. It was black, small, and sturdy. Perfect. She put in a bunch of stuff she would need. Clothes, food, water bottles, brush, tooth brush, eye-liner, and the knife that Kyoto had givin her a few years back. She quickly dressed in her black baggy pants and her one strap red belly shirt. She grabbed extra hair ties and put them around her wrist, grabbing her bag. She tip-toed past her moms and sisters doors, and got to the front door. She grabbed her lighter boots and opened the door, slipping out.

"About time." Gaara grumbled, making Sakura jump. She wirled around to see him leaning against the wall next to his door. He had a bag at his feet.

"Don't do that." She hissed and sat on the floor, pulling her boots on. She tied them up over her pants, they reached almost to her knees. These were the ones that were fashionable, yet great for sneeking around in and being quiet.

"Let's go." Gaara said as soon as she was done. Sakura stood back up and grabbed her bag, slinging it on as they walked.

Naruto was the first one to the gates, eating a steaming cup of ramen. Sakura and Gaara walked over to him, both looking at him, slowly shaking their heads. It was so Naruto to always have Ramen with him. Sakura set her bag down and leaned against the wall, putting her foot up behind her. Naruto sat cross legged on the ground while he finished his breakfast, Gaara stood unmoving. Of course, Kakashi was a few minutes late. They headed out once he was there, not waiting for him lame excuse before they started walking off.

Sakura walked behind them all, slowing her pace to let Kakashi get ahead of her. She hated having people behind her, where she couldn't see them, protect them from behind. It was odd, sure, but she couldn't help it. She had this weird feeling that something bad would happen to them, she she needed to know the second there was something going on the could get any of them hurt. She still didn't talk, not even yell at Naruto to quiet down when he was to loud. She could feel Kakashi's eye on her once in awhile, but he watched all of them. Gaara glanced at her once or twice, when ever she stumbled on a rock. Naruto was in the lead, jabbering about random things. Gaara had slowed and was now walking next to Kakashi, who slowed so he was now closer to Sakura then Naruto. She couldn't tell if it was because Naruto was annoying, or if it was because he thought something was wrong with her.

Sakura watched the sun rise as they walked, refusing to meet eather of their glances. Naruto stopped talking, that could only mean that something was going on. Sakura looked at her blonde friend, he had stopped and was looking into the forest with a stern face, Gaara was looking to the other side of the road, and Kakashi kept turning his head to look both ways. Sakura slipped the knife out of her sleeve and held it tightly, making sure it would not be dropped. She slowly made her way closer to Gaara, to defend his back. Kakashi did the same to Naruto, something was definetly wrong. And then she heard it, the sound of someone breathing, other then her team. There was a lot of them, maybe ten or twelve. The sky was getting brighter, but the woods were still pitch black, making it hard to see who was out there, and where they were.

Sakura leaned her back against Gaara's, looking at the other side of the road, the same side Naruto was. Him and Kakashi were already back to back, looking in the woods intently. Sakura took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She felt Gaara twitch, that wasn't good. She slowly opened her eyes, feeling someone coming closer to her. She flung her knife out, just as a man covered in black jumped out of the trees at her and Gaara. The knife burried deep in his throat, killing him. Everything was in motion. The others from the woods started jumping out at them, the battle had begun. Sakura took out a kunai from the pouch she attatched to her belt and started defending herself, killing as needed. Killing others felt odd, but it gave her a rush. A sort of high that she liked. She dug her knife out of the persons throat and started fighting again.

Sand, it came out of no where. Sand grabbed her and pulled Sakura backwards. Blood splattered from somewhere to her side, spraying her. The high vanished, seeing all of the blood everywhere. Her weapons fell from her hands and she fell to her knees. The sand had left her, once it saved her. Sakura gasped for the air that wouldn't make it to her lungs. So much blood. She could feel it's warmth on her skin. Her face, her arms, her hands. She looked at her hands with horror. She had killed people. People she never had known. People who's familys they would never see again. She had killed someones baby. Someones lover, someones life. Blood splattered at her again, it running down her face, dripping to the ground that hungerly sucked it up. The sand was back, covering her body. Sakura screamed, high and loud, trying to get away from the blood. It was all around her, she could smell it. It was on her skin. She scraped her nails along her arms, trying to get it off. Her skin started to bleed with the efort, making it worse.

The sound of fighting was getting quieter, but the sand never left Sakura. She was greatfull for that. She curled up into a ball and hid her face in her arms, arms that were now covered in her own blood. Everything turned quiet, nothing could be heard through the sand anymore. She couldn't tell if the fighting was over or not. She still didn't move from her ball.

Images flashed before her eyes. A man standing over her with a knife held to her throat. His rough voice slurring the words together. The ripping of her clothes. The pain she felt as she screamed. How he laughed as he slammed in her. The warm trickle of blood as he cut her leg open. It would never end, never. The words of threat that he spoke to her as he finished, as he zipped his pants. He left her there, left her to cry alone.

The sand started moving, Sakura looked up with blurry eyes. A hand reached down to grab her, she screamed and backed away. The sand was completely gone, Gaara stood before her, still reaching out to her. Sakura was still gasping for air. She looked around, they were in the woods, away from where they had been, away from the blood. Kakashi and Naruto were standing away from them, against a tree. Gaara reached for her again. Sakura didn't move as he grabbed her and pulled her to him. He carefully picked her up and carried her over to Kakashi and Naruto.

Naruto looked sad and worried. Kakashi had the same look, but there was something more, understanding? Or maybe it was just more worry... She couldn't tell, she only gave them a quick glance. Gaara set her down against the tree and slowly reached for one of her arms, his eyes never leaving hers. Sakura flinched when he touched her, but did not pull away. Gaara's eyes moved to look down at her raw arms. He took a bottle of water that Kakashi handed him and poured the water over the scrapes. Sakura hissed in pain, and jerked her arm back. Gaara let it go, not wanting to upset her farther.

Sakura looked down at what she had done to herself. A green glow flowed over her arms, healing everything. Once both of her arms were healed, she checked the rest of her body, she was fine. She looked up at Kakashi and Naruto, they both had some wounds. She tried standing, but Gaara held her down, pushing lightly on her shoulder.

"I need t-to heal them." Sakura whispered, looking at Gaara. He looked hesitent as he let her get up, helping her so she didn't fall. Sakura walked over to Kakashi.

"I'm fine, Sakura. You need to rest." He said in a low voice.

"Shut up and move your jacket." She whispered back. Kakashi sighed and pulled his jacket to the side so that Sakura could heal a stab wound that he got to the shoulder. It was heald in seconds. She moved on to Naruto and heald a gash to his arm and a slice to his face.

"Thanks, Sakura." He whispered with a half smile.

Sakura tried to smile back, but knew it didn't come out right, his smile vanished. She slowly turned to Gaara. He had blood on his shirt, she held back the urge to throw-up. She slowly walked over to him and waited for him to take off his shirt. He had nothing wrong with him. His body was unscratched. Then it hit her, it wasn't his blood that was on the shirt. The sand wouldn't have aloud him to get hurt. She swallowed against the stuff rising in her throat.

"I need to clean up." She whispered.

"There's a river just through those trees." Kakashi whispered, pointing to the right. "We're going to set up camp for the night, just yell if you need us." Sakura nodded and walked away, grabbing her bag as she went. A bag that had no blood, but was sure got sprayed durring the fight. She was greatful to who ever cleaned it off.

As soon as she got to the water, she stripped and jumped in. The water was ice-cold, but it felt good. It shocked everything away from her head, made her forget. She stayed under the water as long as she could, going up for a quick breath before diving under again. She let the current push against her, but didn't let it move her down stream. She stayed where she was, wiping away all of the extra blood that was dried to her face and neck. She came up again, one quick breath, but something caught her eye. She stayed with her head half in the water, only her eyes above. A beautiful waterfall stood at the head of the stream. It sparckled in the sun, glittering everywhere.

Sakura breifly wondered why they were stopping so early in the morning. Why they were making camp before noon. She glanced at the sky, the sun was bearly over head. She shrugged it off, it didn't matter. As long as there wasn't anymore blood, everything would be ok. Sakura stared at the waterfall until the sun had passed over head, and was closer to the other herizon. The guys might want to clean off. It was the reason she used to get out of the water and get dressed. She put on a long sleeve shirt, not wanting to see the small scars that the fast healing had left. She put her black pants back on, after making sure there wasn't any blood on them. When Sakura got back, they were all sitting around, not really paying attention. There was a tent set up to one corner, and a fire started in the middle of the small clearing.

They all looked up as Sakura entered, looking at her with careful eyes.

Sakura set her bag down near the tent and walked over and sat far away from any of them, but close to the fire, not wanting to look like she was staying away from them on perpose.

"You guys can go wash up." She whispered, eyes on the fire. "Sorry I took so long."

"It's fine, Sakura." Kakashi said with his eye crinkling smile. "I think I am going to go wash." He stood and grabbed his bag.

"Be back in a bit!" Naruto called as he ran ahead of Kakashi with his bag.

Gaara didn't move. He was laying on his back looking up at the sky. He had only glanced at her when she got back. The other had stared. She was glad that he didn't seem like he was intrested, but as soon as the others were gone, he sat up and stared at her. Sakura looked down at her hands. She heard him get up and walk towards her, but she didn't look up. He sat next to her, she still didn't look up.

"Sakura, what happened back there?" His voice was soft and gentle, but demanding in a way. "You were the first to jump in to the battle... What happened?"

Sakura slowly looked up into his eyes. "It was the blood." She whispered, feeling the tear prickle her eyes as the images came back. "It... reminded me... of something that happened." She looked down as the first tear left her eye. "I'm sorry I over reacted. I shouldn't have done that, you had enough to do without having to protect me."

"Sakura..." She looked up at him, his face was blank, but... was it anger behind his eyes? "What happened? What did you remember?" His voice was low, but strained.

"..." Sakura just stared at him. She couldn't get the words to leave her mouth. She felt that she could trust him, if anyone, but she couldn't let them leave. She didn't want anyone to know what happened. It would make her feel worse. Everyone would hate her. Think of her as lower then dirt. Think she was a disgusting slut.

"Sakura, you can tell me." Gaara whispered, reaching up his hand to wipe away the tears that flowed from her eyes.

"I-I can't." Sakura whispered, looking away again. Gaara caught her chin and pulled her face so she had to look at him. "Gaara, please. I can't."

"Why?"

"Because... Because, I can't!" She whispered and pushed him away, standing and moving across the small clearing. She stood with her back to him, not wanting him to see her weak anymore. She took a few deep breaths and composed herself, hiding everything away.

"Oi! Sakura, Gaara!" Naruto came running into the clearing with just pants on, his bag slung over his shoulder. He was carrying two large fish, very large. Kakashi walked in behind him, holding two more of the large fish. "We caught dinner!" Naruto smiled his large grin. Sakura took another deep breath and turned to face them all.

"I'll cook it." She gave them a small smile, this time it was some what convinsing, to Kakashi and Naruto at least. She could tell from Gaara's look that she knew he didn't believe it.