So this isn't a drabble but rather an idea I had for the future of the series should they get them together before it's very end. It's just something i see happening.

Nope I still don't own them, and I sincerely doubt the series would do as well as it does if i did own them.

Awkward

This is supposed to be easy; we're supposed to slide seamlessly into this. We've been mistaken for being a couple so many times in the last six years that logically when we finally were a couple it would be simple and easy for us, we're already best friends, I rely on him for everything and yet it's so awkward.

I used to able to compartmentalize when it came to this, ignore it until it was an appropriate time to deal with it, but now I can't manage to; everything is just so uncomfortable and I'm not used to it being uncomfortable, in fact the only time it had been uncomfortable before was when we were dating other people. I know that rationally I should just talk to him, he always knows what to say to make it better, but right now I need to feel better about us and I just don't know what to do with myself.

I manage to refocus my attentions on the paper in front of me, a grad student looking desperately for some help on her paper. The attention didn't last long though because he came through the door, "Hey Bones, we've got a case" He smiles and bends over my desk to brush a kiss on my lips. I immediately shoot backwards disengaging myself from him, not because I don't feel the electricity that Angela has so adamantly insisted exists for all these years, but because the feeling of anxiety is over whelming whatever electricity there is.

His facial expression says that he's either hurt or confused, but for now he refrains himself from asking instead choosing to let it go while I gather my things. I smile at him trying to calm his nerves as much as mine, before asking the usual questions, what happened, where are we going, and so on as we exit the lab. Instead of putting a hand on the small of my back though like he used to and I like him to, he instead tries to hold my hand. I quickly make sure that both hands are busy so that he can't try to capture them again. It's not that I don't like holding his hand; it's just that it doesn't feel like us going out on a case. It's not Booth and Brennan but rather some other couple that engages in overt displays of affection. Hand holding should be for when we're doing something on our own separate from work.

He didn't ask anything until we were seated in the SUV, "Bones you ok?"

I couldn't tell him the truth not now, not on the way to a crime scene, "I'm fine Booth why?"

"You are most definitely not fine Bones, you look like you haven't slept in days, and you've flinched every time I get near you. What's going on?"

I don't want him to panic or worry about me, I know he will no matter what though so, I reach over and squeeze his arm, "We'll talk about it later, it's not a big deal." It's a big deal I know it, and I know that he'll be upset with me for lying to him right now I just want to focus on the case before us so I lied to him.

The whole case we were both on edge, he was trying to figure out what was wrong with me and I was trying to convince him that there was nothing wrong between us. It wasn't a difficult case; in fact, it would have been simple if we hadn't been so tense. As it was we weren't communicating well nothing seemed to work out, Angela and Cam both commented on it, Hodgins just steered clear of us the entire time, only giving his reports to Cam.

So when it was finally over he took me home to my apartment and even though I didn't invite him up he came up anyway. Silently we rode the elevator standing on either side of the car keeping as much distance between us as possible. The ping of the elevators arrival at my floor caused us to jump, startled out of our thoughts. He followed me quietly down the hall, standing behind me as I struggled to put the right key in the lock.

The door finally opened and I walked into the apartment ahead of him, going about my normal routine. Hung up my coat, set my purse down and went into my room to change into something other than the skirt I was wearing. The whole time acutely aware of the fact that he had shed his suit jacket and tie, rolled up his sleeves before getting a beer that I keep in the fridge for him and then settling himself on the couch. His way of letting me know that we were going to talk about what ever it was before he went anywhere.

I returned to the living room after changing my clothes brushing my teeth and splashing water on my face, he was staring at the wall sipping on the beer he'd helped himself to. I stood behind him for several minutes watching him trying to figure out how to tell him. He knew I was there but he was waiting for me to speak first.

I took a deep breath reassuring myself that this would in fact be ok we would work it out. I walked around the couch and sat down on the coffee table facing him. "Booth." I breathed reaching for his hand, which he gave me before I let my head fall to stare at my knees.

He waited a few moments, "Bones, tell me what's going on between us. What's wrong?"

I wrenched my head up to look at him; I could feel the tears running down my cheeks. "Why does it feel so awkward?"

"Why does what feel so awkward?" I can see that he's puzzling to understand me, and he desperately wants to help.

"Us… this change between us, why does this feel so awkward? Every one said this was going to be easy… but I just feel uncomfortable." A sob escaped, why was I crying?

"Hey it's going to be ok." He tried to soothe me with a hand to my cheek and I leaned into it briefly trying to absorb the comfort he was offering before standing, to pace the room.

"How can you possibly know that? Everything just feels a little off, a little bit wrong it's making me nervous, I know that you believe that love can last forever and I want believe that it can be true. But it feels like it's already falling apart at its seams." I stopped to look at him. "If this change means that I could lose you permanently I don't think that I can handle that Booth. I need you to be part of my life."

He got up and walked out of the room leaving me standing there, my mind decided that he must be leaving and instead of relief, I felt worse than any anxiety I'd been feeling because of our relationship. I collapsed to the ground, tears streaming down my face, he was leaving because I was uncomfortable, because I told him the changes between us were too much.

He came running into the room when he heard me hit the floor. "Jesus Bones, I'm not going anywhere I was going to get you a glass of wine, in hopes that it would help you relax." He scooped me up off the floor and carried me over to the couch where he settled with me in his lap. He just held me in his lap stroking my hair as I clung to him breathing him in. Eventually I calmed down enough to look up at him.

He smiled down on me, "Better?" I nodded and sat up turning to face him. "Bones how am I suppose to explain this to you again. I'm not going anywhere. I couldn't go anywhere if I wanted to. So just because you're a little uncomfortable with how things are now and experiencing some anxiety doesn't mean that I'm going to leave you behind." I nodded slowly

"What goes on up in here." He tapped my temple, "That's why I love you Bones, I love what is innately you so you getting scared is not going to run me off it's only going to make me fight for you harder. You just have to stop thinking about things so hard and just adjust to things so that they're not so awkward and uncomfortable."

"I can do that." I nodded turning to straddle his lap.

"Good to hear," he dropped a kiss on my forehead, "And if it makes you more comfortable I won't kiss you at work or try and hold your hand until you kiss me at work or try to hold my hand."

He really did love me, "I love you." I whispered putting my head in the crook of his shoulder again. His arms tighten around me in response to the words that I rarely said but he knew I meant them.

"I know." He placed an open mouth kiss on my neck "Are you feeling any anxiety now?" He asked as he moved up the column of my neck before he waited for my answer.

"No, what I'm feeling right now is the complete opposite of anxiety." I assured with him with a kiss of my own as my fingers moved to undo the buttons of his shirt.

Well what did you think?

Baby rose