Author's Note: Sorry this one is so long! Just so much I wanted to squeeze in ahh.
With the new air settling around them as they entered the diner, Vincent and Cam somewhat awkwardly found a table as opposed to the bar, to his delight. Sitting down, he simply couldn't contain the goofy smile on his face as he admired her glow underneath the dingy diner lights. This was nice; this was what he always wanted.
Noticing his beaming gaze, Cam laughed. "Oh what it is, lover boy?" She said, jokingly, as the strange reality began to relax.
"Oh, nothing. Simply admiring the ease, you could say." He was right, there was a new calm and stability between them now. "Fun fact; a woman's heart typically beats faster than a man's." He quipped with a proud smile. Granted, there remained some semblance of weirdness but it no longer demanded to be felt.
Once they had ordered their food from a very tired looking waitress, Cam allowed herself to soak in the ease as well, placing her elbows on the table and just considering his face. The pretty eyes, soft chin, light dusting of facial hair. Then there was just him as a person; his unabashed compassion and sincerity, qualities she had never intended to stake out and find.
"So," He began, realizing how silly it would be to just stare at each other for the entirety of the meal. "Could Dr. Brennan really consider quitting? It seems unfair, nay cruel, to deny the Jeffersonian and the FBI such an asset."
"Absolutely, I can't even begin to consider how I would run the place without her. But, she's allowed to do whatever she pleases, regardless of how it affects me or anyone else. She's not exactly a fan of considering those things." She looked passed him, recalling Brennan's lament on the investment of work, sentiments that ultimately pushed Cam into this evening in the first place. "She has her reasons, though."
"May I ask if you know what will happen to the internship program?" He asked tentatively as their food arrived.
Cam sighed. "I'm not entirely sure; the replacement forensic anthropologist would have to be willing to advise you or the management of the program would fall under someone else in the lab." She had thought to mention that the program might not even continue to run under Dr. Brennan, but she didn't want to spoil his elated mood.
"I'm sure Dr. Brennan would not abandon us interns without making provisions for us; I like to think she cares about our well-beings. But, it would be quite fun to have say, Dr. Hodgins managing the program, he would make a terrific advisor." He said with a smile, taking a sip of his chowder. "Gosh, I do wonder how Hodgins will react when we tell him.
"Tell Hodgins...what?" Cam paused from taking a bit of her sandwich with her face void of any recognition.
Vincent's mouth was pursed and his eyes both puzzled and wide with surprise. He felt a lump building in his throat as he registered the placid look she was giving him. "About...us?"
"Oh," she cast her eyes down as her stomach dropped. Somehow, she was feeling worse than she had felt at his apartment. "I-I think you misunderstood me…"
His elbow was on the table, trying to support his woozy head.
"Being...together does not mean that we can tell people at work." Her hands were in her lap now as her body language became more guarded. "It's a whole thing; it's not easy with my being your boss and you being an intern, especially when you're competing with other students." There was a plea in her tone as his eyebrows joined in evident sadness.
"If any of the other interns or anyone else at the lab thought I was giving you preferential treatment because of our personal lives it could be very bad for both of our reputations. If managing the program did fall to me if Dr. Brennan leaves, that would be even worse. My job is already a struggle, and adding this to the mix could only make it worse." She felt her throat constrict as soon as the phrasing left her mouth. "N-not to say you're embarrassing, or anything!"
Vincent was avoiding her eyes now, looking into his soup for some kind of aid or advice as he felt all his magic being struck out of him. "I-I understand," He swallowed hard. "It would feel selfish to force you to sacrifice your reputation."
What he was saying was true, but neither one of them completely believed it. She uncharacteristically reached over the table and held his hand. "Look," she began. "This doesn't change anything, it really doesn't."
He truly didn't have the heart to fight her on this. Yes, she was more cautious and mature but his feelings weren't strict enough to adhere to that. He had certainly considered someone like Daisy or Clark seizing any opportunity to get him fired or penalized, but now that he had uncovered this wealth of intimacy and closeness he felt much less bothered by thoughts like that.
Not wanting to further strain or hurt her, he met her eyes with a smile. "It's quite alright, you don't have to apologize for anything." He said, happily, as an attempt to mask his deflated nature. He had felt like she had truly given her all, but maybe it was only what she had been willing to give.
The following weeks felt like a hotbed of complications, in and outside the lab. Once Cam and Vincent sorted out their mess, somewhat, it seemed like everyone around them was just dying to make a complete wreck of everything. else As Brennan developed her plans to leave the Jeffersonian, she had been approached to head a dig on the Maluku islands to which Daisy, of course, excitedly agreed to apply to. Feeling detached from Brennan, Booth had decided to take on a position training soldiers in Afghanistan. The final-and the biggest-disruption came when Angela and Hodgins revealed that they had secretly gotten married and were taking a indefinite honeymoon to Paris. And as Cam suspected, once Brennan filed her sabbatical from the Jeffersonian the intern program practically fell apart which only left the Jeffersonian in utter disrepair and, naturally, Cam fully embodied the stress of its downfall.
It was all very complicated for her. Yes, her greatest friends were embarking on journeys for love, discovery, and patriotism, but it still left her in DC with mere crumbs; that had to count for something, right?
Vincent had been handling the dismantling of the program well, but considering his consistent perkiness Cam truly couldn't be sure of exactly how he felt.
She considered him and all of his mysterious layers as she, reluctantly, drove them to the Founding Fathers. Unaware of the awkwardness surrounding these various departures, Angela had gamely organized a going away party before they jetted off to their respective adventures in the following days.
"I love, love Angela, but does she really need to do this?" Cam said somewhat bitterly. If Vincent was going to risk their cover by asking for a ride, he would have to pay for it in being a fully attentive listener to her complaints.
"Well, falling in love is said to share the neurochemical effects of cocaine, so perhaps this party is simply an unreasoned manifestation of her love-fueled high." He supplied. "Speaking of which, considering the fact that the team is disbanded until further notice, don't you think this would be an apt time to finally spill the beans, so to say?" This was dangerous territory, and he knew this.
She turned to him in surprise, but trying to stay focused on the road. Between now and that night at the diner, the circumstances of their relationship had changed. They had more of a kaydence now and everything they did felt closer and deeper; every touch that more dazzling, every dinner date more thrilling, every sleepover more shockingly intimate. They had certainly compromised; she allowed herself to do things a legitimate girlfriend would do, and he allowed himself to to be more accepting, but there was still that one thing.
"I'm not like you. I need the validation, the reassurance from those around me and having to hide the most important thing in my life from them is...it's maddening." He said in an attempt to sound convincing. That night at the diner he had told her he was okay with it, because he ultimately thought he would be and ,of course, because he was already starting to fall for her.
"How does telling people change anything?"
"I-It just does! If not now, then when will we ever tell them?" He was letting it get away from him now-he could see that-but he had let this conflict fester and build under the pressure of their relationship for too long now. The constant, budding shame made her love seem like something he had to demand, as oppose to something she eagerly gave.
"I…" Cam's eyes were fixated on the road now, trying to find a parking spot. "I'm not talking about this right before the party; I'm not going to make it anymore of a complicated wreck than it is already."
Vincent's face fell, that wasn't what he wanted to hear, of course. He sank deep into the car seat as she attempted to catch his eye. His arms were crossed, now he was the one guarding his body. "I'll wait ten minutes before getting out of the car, don't worry."
Her face was hurt, but she was just being honest. "I'm not embarrassed by you or anything, there is just so much happening right now. And none of this changes how I feel about you…" she reiterated, but he was locked into his stew of frustration.
Retreating her offering, she left the car and tried to get her breathing in check before entering the bar. Putting on her best act, she cheerfully greeted their assembled group with their drinks already flowing. Exactly ten minutes later, Vincent entered the bar and put on his best act too, their winning charade of greeting each other as if they had not just had a fight.
Perhaps all those weeks ago, their friends would've flocked with scepulation at their interactions, but they had all gotten so busy with their shared splendors to care about flimsy office gossip. A part of Cam even wondered if they would even care if she really spilled their beans.
As the party continued with various toasts to marriage, missing links to human evolution, and America they were all slightly tipsy. Vincent was, as expected, moreso than the rest but Cam attempted to keep her concern light so as not to cause suspicion.
"Are you okay, buddy?" Sweets asked Vincent while he downed his fifth shot.
"Yes! I am perfectly terrrrrific!" He exclaimed and wrapped an arm around Sweets. "Fun fact: only female mosquitoes bite you. Isn't that amazing, Sweets? The fierce, emotionally guarded females will hurt you the most."
Cam tried to hide her eye roll, but it was hard as her own brain became fuzzy by the wine. Naturally, she would feel obligated to get him cleaned up and taken home considering she had put him in such distress in the first place.
"Calm down, Vince." Hodgins said, reaching over to his friend. "Try not to put too much of a damper on our nuptials."
Vincent hiccuped. "My bad, Dr. Hodgins, but did you know that the average bed contains over 6 billion dust mites?" He spouted excitedly. He knew he was probably embarrassing and worrying Cam at this point, but the selfish and hurt part of him only furthered the behavior.
Angela's eyebrows raised. "Wow, you know just the right things to say. I truly couldn't have gone on with my life without knowing that."
"I'm sure Mr. Nigel-Murray simply can't contain his excitement over your wedding—" Brennan began.
"And about the potential of our findings in Maluku!" Daisy added, resulting in an exchange of awkward glances.
"Yes...anyhow, I'm sure he is simply expressing the excess of his joy through a copious consumption of alcohol." Brennan finished resolutely.
"He just knows how to have fun, Bones!" Booth said with a smirk.
"Actually," Vincent slurred. "I think it is quite rude of you all to leave Cam for your grand adventures. She feels hurt and abandoned."
Their assembled group grew silent as Vincent continued his drunken ramblings. "But of course, I'm not enough for her. I never shall be, I suppose." He finished the drink while completely oblivious of the gaping mouths and shocked expressions on his friends faces.
Cam's throat grew hoarse as the wide eyes that were on Vincent slowly crept to her. In a fit, she left the bar, not even bothering to meet her friend's expressions of disbelief.
Seeing her leave jolted Vincent out of his languorous position as he shouted at her, following her outside.
"Camille! Please! I'm sorry!" He tried not to trip on himself as he followed her. "I-I just don't think it's right that they're abandoning you like this."
Cam turned around with a fierce wip of her ponytail. "Then let me tell them that myself! Do you have any idea how that made me feel?"
He threw up in hands in frustration. "Well," he paused. "Do you have any idea how it makes me feel when I you feel this need to hide me from everyone? Like I'm this shameful thing?"
Her cheeks were red, both from the drinking and the growing upset. "I told you that my not wanting to tell didn't mean anything." She wasn't being completely honest, and they both knew. There remained that one piece of her still devoted to her work. "That night was still a big deal for me, allowing myself to be with you was a big deal and an important decision. And why didn't you ever say anything before?"
There was a glaze developing behind his eyes as some version of tears. "I didn't say anything because I thought I was falling for you; I thought you were being sincere." He ran a hand through his hair as he felt his chest tightening in frustration. "You know what, Camille, you don't have to take the time to fire me after this because I'm quitting! I am going on Jeopardy and I'll win so much money and I'll travel to maybe Malaysia or China or Thailand and I'm going to find a woman who will actually likes me enough to tell her flipping friends!" It was mean, and it wasn't true.
"O-oh, really?" His hysteria was quickly turning into her anger. "Well, maybe I'm too mature to be playing hide the pipet in the supply closet with a teenager! I already have one child, and I definitely don't need another." It was mean, and it wasn't true.
By now, their argument had drawn out most of the bar patrons, including their friends. Noticing them and their looks of shock, Vincent stretched out his arms to further his exclamation. "Are you in awe of our clever trick? Dr. Camille Saroyan was shagging an intern behind everyone's back!" He yelled. "And I LOVED it!"
Cam rubbed her forehead in frustration, this evening quite possibly couldn't get any worse. As Vincent turned back to her, his face was tired and his eyes were sad, but she didn't know what she could say anymore. Suddenly, he felt his stomach lurch, but this time vomit actually came out and expelled onto her shoes.
"You...are such a child!" She was yelling now. This had all been such a mistake; the free, comforting Cam who had offered solace on the catwalk all those months ago was irritated, and maybe even a bit heart broken.
"At least I'm honest about my unwavering affection!" He shouted as he hurled again, but blessedly on the sidewalk now. Hodgins and Booth finally swooped in, breaking from their hypnosis from shock.
"Alright, Vincent, we're gonna get you home." Booth attempted to prop Vincent up while trying to keep his confused glances at Cam to a minimum. "Do you have his address, Camille?"
Cam had her arms crossed and was staring at the ground. "Y-yes." she stifled at she got out her phone to text it to him.
"I'm sure he's going to be okay." Hodgins supplied as Booth practically dropped their drunken friend on him, much to Hodgins' upset.
Booth placed a friendly hand on Cam's shoulder. "Are you sure that you're doing okay?"
"Seeley, it's puke, I've been around a lot worse."
"No," he was looking at her more seriously now. "About everything. With us leaving, and now...this stuff." He acknowledged with a clumsy hand to Vincent.
She allowed herself to look at Vincent now; he was drooping in Hodgins' arms now like a piece of jello, and she found her emotions a mix of guilt and anger. Anger over the embarrassment, the vomit, and his verbal attacks, but guilty that she had still let work control her even though she believed it didn't anymore, or at least wanted to believe that.
"It's not a big deal," She said dismissively as an attempt to keep things light. She turned away and was met by sympathetic looks from Angela and Brennan, napkins in hand. Sitting on the steps to the bar, they helped Cam clean the vomit off of her shoes as they watched Booth, Hodgins, and Vincent stow away into a cab.
"What happened to Daisy and Sweets?" Cam asked.
"Well," Angela began, tossing away a soiled tissue. "Your little argument managed to trigger Daisy and Sweets' own drama with her leaving and all, so they left since Sweets 'did not want to contribute to an avalanche of emotional distress.' And speaking of which…" Her expression grew more quizzical. "When exactly were you planning on telling us about your own little romantic tryst?"
"Actually, I would like to acknowledge that I was the first to suspect of your romantic relationship with Mr. Nigel-Murray. The instinctive manner in which you grabbed his arm when we found the spiders in the clay suggested that you naturally viewed him as a figure of protection and comfort." Brennan added, causing Cam's face to flush.
"Oh, god. So everyone already knew?" Cam let her head fall to her hands in frustration. "I can't even manage to hide a relationship, let alone be in one."
"It's not a competition, Brennan, but we did pick up on it a little." Angela smirked. "But we were waiting for you to spill the dirt yourself."
"Angela, she couldn't have, she's Vincent's boss."
"Yes, thank you, Dr. Brennan." Cam approved. "I wanted to be more forthcoming, but as his boss I could've gotten into legitimate trouble or difficult situations and at the time it was too big of a risk."
"But, isn't that kind of the point?" Angela postulated as she stretched out her legs on the stairs, looking up at the stars "For me, anyway, love is always about the risk, y'know? You're giving so much to this person, and you can't exactly know what they're going to do with it, but you go along with it anyway."
"But Angela, that frame of thinking completely goes against our Darwinian instincts to protect ourselves and our best interests." Brennan argued which prompted an exhausted, yet sympathetic, eye roll from Angela.
"I'm too willful for that, anyway." Cam sighed as she felt her eyes become teary. "If I managed to get fired, I'm sure I would've resented him or something which would've been awful, but clearly that doesn't matter now. I have no job, no FBI agent, no forensic anthropologist, no entomologist, no artist-computer scientist extraordinaire, no him, and vomit in my shoes."