Thanks everyone for the reviews and positive words! Hope everyone is still enjoying the story. This chapter goes into Derek's back-story with one flashback. This will probably result in this being broken up into two chapters.

Meredith rolled over the next morning to find Derek's space empty. She sat up and stretched and listened to here the shower running. She quickly pulled out her scrubs and laid them on the bed, so she could shower next. She then went downstairs and started to make a cup of coffee. She poured herself a cup, along with pouring Derek one. He entered the kitchen a few minutes later, his hair still wet from his shower.

"Morning." said Meredith kissing his cheek. "Coffee." said Meredith holding it out to him. He took it without saying a word. He then sat down and quickly poured a bowl of muesli. He then ate in silence. "Sleep okay?" asked Meredith. Derek poured the rest of the milk out in the sink. Meredith immediately grabbed his arm turning him around. "What's wrong Derek?" asked Meredith.

"Nothing." said Derek as he quickly walked away grabbing a travel mug and pouring more coffee into it.

"Obviously something is. You're being completely quiet and unfriendly this morning. You didn't even say good morning." said Meredith.

"Meredith, I'm fine." said Derek his voice growing slightly more irritated.

"Clearly you're not Derek. Why won't you tell me what's wrong?" asked Meredith.

"Because nothing is wrong!" yelled Derek. Meredith's eyes averted to the floor as he yelled sharply at her." Meredith…" started Derek knowing he should have snapped at her.

"No, if you're going to be an ass, then go be an ass at work." said Meredith before walking up the stairs to go shower.

Derek sighed as he threw on his jacket and quickly grabbed the steaming mug of coffee and left the house slamming the door behind him.

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Meredith sat at the front desk in the clinic, furiously scribbling down notes on a chat. Just because he woke up on the wrong side of the bed, didn't mean it gave him the right to take it out on her. She stabbed her fork sharply into the salad she was eating.

"Whoa someone's angry." said Mark as he walked and smirked at her before leaning up against the front desk. "Trouble in paradise?" asked Mark.

"No. Derek is just being a completely and total ass today. He woke up and wasn't talking to me and then I asked him what was wrong and he snapped at me." said Meredith. "I was just concerned because he never acts like that. He had like an almost dazed look on his face. "

Mark's smile dropped. The only time his friend did that was on one particular day year after year. He looked around for a calendar or something with date, to clarify what he was thinking. When he couldn't find one he turned to Meredith. "What's today's date?" asked Mark.

"January twenty first. Why?" asked Meredith looking up from her work and looking into Mark's concerned eyes. "What's going on?" asked Meredith.

Mark sighed as he rubbed his temple. "Thirty years ago today, Derek's dad died. He always gets this like this on this day every year, but this year because it's been thirty years… it probably is really hard for him." said Mark.

Meredith let Mark finish before she abruptly got up from her chair. "Tell one of the interns to keep the clinic under control." She immediately left the room racing down the corridor in search for him. "How could I not have known something like this was bothering him?"

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"Dad!" called a young Derek as he ran into the house excitedly. "Dad!" called again running straight into his father.

"Derek." laughed Michael Shepherd. "One of these days you're going to kill the both of us. Now what was so important that you had to scream and run?" asked Michael as he ruffled his son's curls.

"Playoff tickets Dad!" said Derek as he held the two tickets up. "I waited three hours at Yankee Stadium and spent all the money I made mowing lawns this Summer." said Derek as he slipped of his sneakers, knowing his mother would kill him if he brought dirt into the house again.

Michael smiled at his on, with his blues eyes shining. "That's great Derek. Are they good seats?" he asked.

"In the blue section, that's the best they had but it's better than nothing right?" said Derek.

"That's right. Now why aren't you on the phone with Mark telling him where to meet and such." said Michael as he sat down at the dining room table, reading the New York Times.

"Because I'm not taking him, I'm taking you." said Derek as he looked at his father his blue eyes shining.

Michael looked up from the paper and smiled at his son. "Derek… you don't have to do that, you don't want to take your old man to a baseball game with you."

"Of course I do." said Derek. "Just you and me. No girls. Us being men." grinned Derek.

"Just us being men."

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Derek tapped his fingers impatiently on his lap as he and his father sat in front of Yankee Stadium behind a line of cars. He sat fidgeting hoping that traffic would clear up so that they wouldn't.

"Derek why don't you get out and hold a place in line for checking tickets? I'll drive around and see if there is a spot somewhere." said Michael as she pulled out slightly so Derek could get out.

He quickly jumped out of the car shutting the door behind him and walked over to the long line. He stood there patiently tapping his foot against the concrete. He stood there for a few moments in silence till he heard a woman scream. He looked up and saw that there had been a car crash. He didn't think much of it till he looked up again to see it was his car that was flipped on its side, as result of two cars sandwiching it.

"Dad!" he called as he raced back into the parking lot and raced over to the car to see two men pulling his unconscious father out of the totaled car. He quickly ran over to them as they set him down on the ground.

"Dad?" called Derek as he laid his hands against his chest. "Someone call 911!" screamed Derek.

Derek was pulled out of his thoughts as someone entered the on call room. He hung his head in his hands. He then felt a hand run up and down his back. He knew those delicate fingers. He opened his eyes to see Meredith sitting next to him. She had a concerned caring look in her eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me?" asked Meredith as she continued to run her hand against his back.

Derek shrugged shaking his head, no words wanting to come out his mouth, in fear of his voice quivering. Meredith ran her fingers across his face gently feeling the stubble against her palm.

"Oh Derek." said Meredith as she looked into his sad eyes.

And that's when he lost it. When she pulled him into her arms and he felt her heart beating against his. His body shook as tears engulfed his body.

"I should have been able to save him."