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Chapter 10

Leta was the only real friend he had ever had — Most people thought of Newt as the weird guy with an obsessive amount of love for animals. He annoyed others, because he stuttered too often or wasn't interested in their so special hobbies such as doing some boring sport, playing some totally not interesting instruments or talk about the new gossip. Newt didn't want to lie to people, he didn't want to pretend to like any of them. If he didn't care about something, than he shouldn't be forced to act as if he would. Leta was the only person that understood him. She liked beasts as much as he did. At least he had thought that she did. There were so many things Leta had done wrong in her life, but Newt didn't care. Too late. He couldn't hold the memories back, now that he had thought about it.

"You did what?!" "I had to help it. There was no other way. I didn't know that it would attack Sebastian" "You should have told me, Leta. You can't just take a jarvey to Hogwarts without telling anyone" She smiled. "You mean, when I want to break school rules, next time, I should let you do the important part? No Newt, I won't. I couldn't tell anyone, especially not you. You would have adopted it or something and would have kept it forever. I just wanted to help it. But it doesn't matter now, Sebastian's already told the headmaster. I can't do anything against my expulsion", she said. Newt saw the tears in her eyes. He hated to see her sad. "Leta, there is always a way", he whispered, before he wiped her tears away. "Newt, before I go, you should know, you're the best friend I've ever had", she murmured.

"What exactly happened, Mr. Scamander?" "Leta already told you, I don't think there are anymore explanations needed" "Why are you here, then, if you are not willing to help?" "Professor... umm..." "What do you mean by umm, Mr. Scamander?" "It was all my fault. Leta shouldn't be blamed for anything I have done. It was my idea to take a jarvey to Hogwarts. This is why I willingly choose to take Letas punishment" Professor Dippet believed him, he just looked a bit surprised. "Are you sure that you choose this path? We won't take your wand, because Miss Lestrange did the deed. The only punishment that will follow so now be your expulsion, Mr. Scamander, is that correct?" "Yes it is, sir" "With these words, Mr. Newton Scamander be now expelled from the Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry", the headmaster said, and spoke some magic words. Newt didn't look up, he didn't even have to, to know that Albus Dumbledore was staring at him. But he had chosen. Everybody in this room, all of these professors, thought that he had chosen to be selfless and sacrifice his education for his best friend. But Newt wasn't selfless, he was more egoistic than ever. He did it for himself, because he didn't want Leta to be expelled, didn't want her to be hurt. Because if she wasn't expelled, if she didn't have to suffer, he would be happy.

"Newt, I never wanted you to do anything for me! I never wanted you to take the blame for anything. I should be punished for the things I have done, but instead you are more stubborn than ever! Don't you think I chose to be responsible? A part of growing up is becoming responsible for your own ways, Newt. I never asked you to choose for me. You could have at least asked me before deciding my future! And I thought you would really understand me, understand that I want to be free. But it seems to be that you didn't really understand me ever, because if you did, you wouldn't just do this to me! I never wanted you to be my hero, I never wanted you to sacrifice anything for me! You know what: I will have to tell you this, because I may never see you again, after your stupid decision. You are nothing more but a stupid, stubborn and egoistic Hufflepuff. You don't think about others, you don't ask your friends. Yes, you don't think about anybody but yourself and how you feel. And maybe that's reason why you never had any friends" Letas words were knifes, which were now stuck in his heart for ever. But it was worse to see the hate and anger in Letas eyes, and her tears falling down to the ground. "Leta, I just wanted you to be happy", he whispered, but she still heard him. "Yes, of course, you had the best motives in the world, Newt. But maybe things don't always work the way they should. You see, I am not happy, not a bit. Everything you do, everything you say, it chokes me and disgusts me. You are a good human, Newt, you are. But I don't want to see you ever again, because you obviously can't understand other peoples feelings. I thought you were my friend, maybe more, but all you ever did was hurt me!", she said, turned away and ran back to the school. She left Newt alone, standing next to the forest, his favorite part of Hogwarts. "But Leta, I... I love you", he whispered. But Leta was too far away to hear him, and they would never be as close as they once had been.

"We're about to arrive in London, master", Krall said. It was one of those days in his life, were Grindelwald remembered why he was doing all of this. He felt the superiority again, he didn't need anything else but it, this pure freedom, just because of his work. He was the only one able to do this, the only one who had the courage and the power to rule the world. Why did he feel like a king, while he was standing in the rain? The smile on his face wasn't washed away by the rain, today, nothing could stop him. "Vinda, Krall, Corvus. I have a special order for you: You have to deal with the wizengamot on your own, while I take care of the minister of magic" "Alright, master" How strange and at the same time superior it made Grindelwald feel, to listen to their stupidity and ignorance. "But, we can't do that on our own", Vinda said. "You'll have to." "We can't, we aren't able to. It is your business, why don't you do the work? We're not your slaves", Corvus said. "Imperio", Grindelwald whispered, and just like puppets on his strings, they all walked away. "And it's: ,We aren't your slaves, sir'", he smiled. As he was standing alone in the ran, he laughed. Change of the plan. And he went back into the carriage. Target: Paris.

Newt hated himself, sometimes. Often. Almost every time when he thought about Leta. He wanted to drown in his self doubts, so the voices in his head would be silent. The greatest magizoologist ever, a humble man and good human, hero. He was none of the things the papers called him. He had never been. There were so many things in life he had wanted to achieve, but he couldn't reach any of his goals. He should have listened to Leta. He should have listened to them all: if he had listened to the opinions of others more than to his own, maybe he would have become a normal human. But he never did. He always believed that his way of seeing the world was right. But maybe it wasn't. He shouldn't have come here, Leta didn't need him and Grindelwald wouldn't arrive here too soon. He shouldn't have taken the blame. The other wizards would never realize how important and beautiful these creatures were, they would never understand him. He had failed everything he ever wanted. And it was all his own fault. He realized too late, that he was laying on the hotel rooms carpet, tears all over his clothing. Why did he have to be such a strange person? Why couldn't he be happy with his life, just like most people were? Why did he have to choose to live the hard way? What if it had been the wrong choice, if he could have been anything, but his heart ruled him too much. He should quit being a magizoologist, he should quit and give the beasts to someone else, maybe Jacob or Queenie. Or Tina. He had left her alone, even though he had known that she would hate him for it. It didn't matter what Professor Dumbledore had told him once, it didn't anymore. He was a bad person, just for leaving the people that mattered to him most for his old crush. Some time later, as the tears slowly dried, he began to hear this voice. It sounded familiar, strange. But it was only his imagination. He only saw darkness, he had closed his eyes and waited for the doubts to go away, while tears ran down his face again.

I suppose this is what they call a breaking point, the voice said. The voice spoke louder, more confident and superior to him than Newts usual thoughts ever did. "Maybe it is", Newt whispered. Congratulations, Newt. You ran after you're first love and left the only person that truly loves you behind. To death or to nothing, it is unclear. "Dumbledore isn't in love with me. To be honest, I heard rumors about him being umm... gay, but you shouldn't believe the gossip, should you?" Newt could've sworn that he had heard the voice laugh about him. It was no real laugh, but a sad laugh, ironically, as if the voice had lost too much and had not enough tears to cry, so the laugh was the only thing that could express his emotions. He wouldn't be in love with someone like you. You don't even know him. Besides, I am not talking about Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. But you wouldn't understand. I am here to tell you, Newt, there is nothing that you could do against me. You are nothing compared to what I am. And here you lie, crying, like a cockroach, small under my shoes. And I will destroy you like this cockroach, if you don't realize that it is better to fight with me instead of fighting against me. I never want anyone to die or to get hurt. But if you aren't willing to believe in a greater world, than you are not worth seeing it. Newt had slowly turned around, and it really was Grindelwald, standing next to him. The next moment, he disapparated and disappeared until the next time Newt would be able to see him. At least the slow realization that he had been right made him feel a bit better. Still, Grindelwald was back and more willing than ever to manipulate the world.

Why did all his nightmares had to come to life? He hated it, hated sitting here, next to the minister of magic in the wizengamot. Everybody around him was talking loud, everybody was excited and awaiting the arrival of their new special guest: Gellert Grindelwald. And even though they had to catch him, their first impulse was still trying to debate with the most evil wizard in history. Gellert Grindelwald was right, they all believed that their own opinion was the truth. The only true government, chosen and elected in democracy, they would be able to handle this little wizard on their own, wouldn't they? But Dumbledore had learned that there was no one better in playing others than Gellert Grindelwald. He heard the applause as Grindelwald came in, no aurors guiding him. Ignorance really made them blind.