Chapter 11
It had been a few weeks since Riley's breakdown, Sarah's coming out and everything that came with it and life had been rather quiet since then. Sarah had been talking a lot with her parents, and even though it was still very difficult for them, they were trying to understand and educate themselves. Riley's back was healing rather well and she started going back to school fulltime. She was exhausted, but she would be done with the antibiotics soon, so her body wouldn't have to work so hard anymore.
Maura was currently working in her office, going over what seemed to be an endless amount of results from the crime lab. She just came back from picking up Riley at school, who was now reading a book for her English class on the couch in Maura's office. Usually, when Jane and Maura had to work late, the girl would stay home alone and Angela would try to check in on her if necessary, but today Riley had requested to come with her mother. The only homework she had was to finish this book and she could easily do that in Maura's office.
"Maura." Jane stomped into Maura's office, looking hasty and fussy. "I need to talk to you." It wasn't until she looked around that she saw Riley sitting on the couch. "Hey, baby. Didn't see you there." Jane smiled and kissed the top of her daughter's head, eliciting a sweet smile from the girl.
"What's wrong, Jane?"
Jane turned back to her wife and Maura saw a strange kind of urge in her brown eyes. She understood that Jane wanted to talk in private, so she stood up and followed her wife to the elevators after quickly caressing her daughter's hair, telling the girl that they'd be right back.
"Jane, you're scaring me. Did you find the suspect?"
"No. We found another murder. Married couple. Murdered in their own house." Jane pressed the elevator buttons so many times Maura thought it was going to fall off.
"Oh God." Maura said, closing her eyes. They had been working on a rather tough case, and the lack of progress frustrated them. The homicide teams had found two murdered couples, one of which they found today. There were two suspects, but they were nowhere to be found.
Maura followed Jane to the break room and stopped in the doorway, seeing a little blonde girl coloring at the table. "What's going on, Jane?" Maura asked, still not understanding why Jane had disturbed her work.
Jane turned to her wife and Maura saw that strange urge in Jane's eyes making place for a loving stare. "This is Lizzie." She explained softly, not audible for the small girl at the table. "She's five years old and her parents just got brutally murdered in their own home."
"Oh no." Maura whispered, immediately feeling the girl's pain.
"She hid in a closet in her room, that's where I found her." Jane explained, looking at Lizzie. "She immediately clung to me when I picked her up. She kept asking for her mommy and daddy and I had to tell her they were gone, forever. It made her cry but I don't think she fully understands yet. I brought her back here."
"Is her family picking her up?" Maura asked, touched by her wife's heartfelt words.
"That's the thing." Jane sighed and looked back at her wife. "She has none. The mom's parents died a long time ago, the dad has a mother, but she's 85 and tied to a wheelchair in Texas. They haven't seen each other in years. Lizzie has an aunt in Europe, we tried to contact her but she doesn't reply."
"That's it?"
"Yeah." Jane averted her gaze and leaned against the doorpost. "That's it."
Maura slowly started to realize why Jane brought the girl here and got Maura from her office. She placed her hand on Jane's upper arm and rubbed it lovingly. "Jane, babe, what are you trying to tell me?"
"I don't know, Maur. What if this is a sign from God, or the universe, or whatever?" Jane asked, looking directly at the blonde again. "A sign to expand our family?"
Maura smiled and felt tears burning in her eyes as she cupped her wife's cheek, pulling her into a quick and loving kiss. "A sign to adopt this little girl that needs a family?"
"Yeah," Jane replied with an insecure smile. "I mean, I know we talked about how it would be nice to have a boy, 'cause we already have a girl, but…"
"Life doesn't let you pick the gender of your kids." Maura answered softly. "We'll love either one. But Jane, I don't know if we're ready for this."
"Will we ever be?"
Maura thought about that question and concluded that the answer would probably be 'no'. There would always be something that would prevent them from getting another child. Life wasn't going to just make time for them, life wouldn't suddenly calm down for them. And sometimes, you have to take a leap. Maura immediately felt fear in her chest, but that fear disappeared when she saw the little girl looking up at the two women in the doorway.
"Hey, little girl." Jane greeted her softly with a sweet smile. She kneeled down next to the girl and placed her hands on her small knees. "You remember me?"
Lizzie nodded. "Yeah, you're from the police."
"Yes, I am." Jane turned to Maura and reached her hand to invite her down.
Maura kneeled next to her wife and looked at the little girl in the chair. She met with beautiful hazelnut brown eyes, framed with long light eyelashes. Lizzie's hair was blonde, curly and frizzy and Maura couldn't help seeing the resemblance with Jane's unruly curls.
"Hey Lizzie. I'm Maura."
Lizzie smiled shyly and nodded. "When are my mommy and daddy coming back?"
Maura snapped her attention to her wife and felt her throat closing up at the innocent question. Jane sighed and her eyes filled with pain. "I told you, honey. They're not coming back."
"Why?" Lizzie's bottom lip quivered and Maura saw thick tears in her brown eyes.
"Because…" Jane sighed and caressed the girl's cheek for a second, wiping a small tear. "They're not coming back, sweetie."
Lizzie looked down at her lap and tears kept falling down her cheeks, causing Jane to stand up and pull the little girl in her lap, taking Lizzie's place in the chair. She immediately clung to the detective as Jane hugged the tiny body close. "I'm sorry, honey." Jane whispered, rocking the girl back and forth.
Maura gently grabbed Lizzie's tiny hand and rubbed her knuckles. How do you tell a five-year old child that her parents died? The girl didn't understand what was happening and she just wanted her mommy and daddy. "Jane," Maura whispered, "can we prevent her from going into foster care?"
Jane rested her chin on top of blonde curls to look at her wife. "There's a social worker coming in, we'll have to ask."
Maura nodded and rubbed Lizzie's back for a moment. "What did you draw, Lizzie?"
The girl turned to her drawing and pointed with her small finger. "This is my room, with my bed and this is Stevie. This is me, in my closet and this is you from the police officer. When you picked me up 'cause my mommy and daddy are gone."
"It's a beautiful drawing." Maura complimented the girl, eliciting a proud smile.
They stayed silent for a few moments, Jane and Maura watching while Lizzie continued her drawing, not moving from Jane's lap. Eventually, Maura stood up and captured Jane's lips a in a sweet kiss. "I have to go back downstairs, I need to finish going through those reports if I want to make it home in time for dinner."
Suddenly Lizzie broke into a fit of giggles and put her small hands in front of her mouth. "You kissed a lady!" She giggled, looking up at Jane.
"Yes I did, a very beautiful lady." Jane answered with a smirk.
"But you're a girl!" Lizzie said, still giggling. "Girls kiss boys."
"Well, some girls kiss girls." Jane explained, trying to smooth Lizzie's unruly blond curls. "I don't like to kiss boys." Jane wrinkled her nose, eliciting another giggle from the small girl. "I like to kiss girls."
"Why?"
"Because girls are soft and pretty." Jane explained simply with a slight shrug.
Lizzie looked up at the brunette with a fascinated look on her young face. She reached her up and grabbed a strand of Jane's hair to play with. "You're soft and pretty too."
"That's why I like to kiss her," Maura said with a bright smile before pressing her lips against her wife's again. She wished all people would think like this little girl. She smiled and brushed Jane's hair back. "I'll go talk to Riley."
"Make sure you tell her nothing's final yet, okay? We're just seeing if we can take her in until we know more." Jane said, not wanting things to move too fast for their teenage daughter.
"I will." Maura smiled and squeezed Jane's shoulder before walking out of the break room. "I love you."
"I love you too. I'll give you a call when the social worker gets here."
Maura walked back to the elevator and pressed the downstairs button to make her way back to her daughter. She knew Riley loved the idea of having a sibling, but it had always been a fantasy, a dream. It was getting very real now. Suddenly there was a small girl in need of a family and even though Maura was scared and not sure if she could raise two children, she wanted to give Lizzie a family more than anything. She felt the same urge that she felt when they started fostering Riley, that undeniable urge to offer a lonely girl a loving home.
"Hi, love." Maura said softly as she entered her office. "Get your feet off the couch." She sat down next to her daughter and lifted the girl's feet off her expensive designer couch.
Riley didn't avert her attention from her book until she felt her mother's arms wrapping around her shoulders. She closed her book and allowed Maura to pull her close, a surprised look showing on the girl's face. "What's going on, Mom?"
Maura hummed and kissed the side of Riley's head. "I just want to hug you for a while." Maura smiled and slightly pulled back to look at her daughter, brushing a strand of hair out of the girl's face. "I love you, honey."
Riley smiled as Maura pressed a loving kiss against her forehead. "I love you too, Mom."
Maura pulled back and looked lovingly in her daughter's bright blue eyes. "Listen. You know your ma has been very busy with a very difficult case, don't you?"
"Yeah. She told me there was someone that murdered a lot of people but they can't find him."
"Or her. Exactly. Now, this morning, two people were killed. A married couple from the other side of the city."
"That's awful." Riley whispered, truly mortified to hear the news.
"It is," Maura replied, tucking a strand of hair behind Riley's ear. "The two victims, they had a little daughter. A five-year old girl named Lizzie." Maura looked at her daughter and saw the realization hitting her. She tried to read her expression and saw both excitement and fear. "There's a social worker coming in to see if we can take her home with us."
"Are you gonna adopt her?" Riley asked, her voice laced with hesitation and insecurity.
"We don't know, honey." Maura said, immediately noticing the discomfort in her daughter. "Right now, we just want to take her in to prevent her from getting caught up in the foster system. That's all."
Riley nodded and allowed Maura to wrap her arms around the girl again. She felt Riley snuggling her head in the crook of her neck and she smiled lovingly, kissing the side of her head. "It's not that you're not enough, sweetheart," Maura whispered, desperately wanting to take away any possible insecurities and doubt about their love.
Riley nodded against her mother but Maura felt her daughter's skinny arms wrapping around her waist. "You're more than enough. You made our lives so much better and we're so, so happy that you're our daughter. We don't want a new daughter or a new chance, or whatever it may look like. You have to know that, honey."
"I know." Riley whispered through tears that suddenly welled up in her eyes.
Maura pulled back and cupped her daughter's face, her thumbs gently wiping away her tears. "We just want to look after Lizzie, that's all. Nothing is final yet."
"It's okay, Mom." Riley smiled and allowed Maura to wipe her tears with the back of her hand. The girl averted her gaze towards her lap, breaking eye contact. "It's just a little overwhelming suddenly I guess."
"I know. For us too." Maura whispered as she brushed Riley's long hair over the girl's shoulder. "But no matter what happens, we'll be your moms and you'll be our daughter and we'll always love you with all our hearts."
Riley nodded and wrapped her arms back around her mother, snuggling close into a warm embrace. Maura smiled and pulled her daughter close. "You might have to share our hugs though."
Riley chuckled and Maura felt the girl relaxing in her arms. "I can do that." Riley said with a smile. "Or we'll each pick a mother, that way I'll get your hugs and Lizzie gets all the hugs from Ma."
Maura laughed and slowly rocked her daughter back and forth, keeping her strong hold. She fought the urge to rub the girl's back, not wanting to tear open the injuries that were still there.
"Oh no, that won't work 'cause I'll miss Ma's hugs." Riley added after a moment of silence.
"Hmm, aren't my hugs better though?" Maura smirked.
"Nah." Riley shrugged. "You squeeze me so hard I can't breathe sometimes." She chuckled when Maura squeezed the girl into her.
Maura kept the embrace for a few minutes before her phone buzzed. She kissed her daughter's head and stood up to pick it up, seeing the screen lighting up with Jane's smiling face. "Hi, love."
"Hey. I talked to the social worker. Her name is Patricia. She said we can take Lizzie in for tonight, and we'll have to be at her office tomorrow so we can either sign the papers to foster her, or drop her off."
"And if we drop her off, she goes into foster care?"
"Yeah."
Maura rubbed her forehead and knew they wouldn't want that to happen. "So, we're taking her home?"
"If you ask me, yeah. She's pretty shaken up."
"Are you sure, Jane?" Maura asked after a short silence, wanting her wife to be absolutely sure before they took this girl home.
"Yeah, what do you mean?"
"I mean…" Maura lowered her voice and turned around, not wanting to upset Riley. "If we take Lizzie home, we are going to fall for her. We're going to want to keep her in our family."
Jane stayed silent on the other end of the line, causing Maura to worry. "Babe?"
"I uhm… I hadn't thought about it like that."
Maura sighed and sat down on the edge of her desk, watching Riley going back to reading her book again while she waited for her wife to answer.
"Do you think we can do this?"
Maura hesitated for a second but quickly made up her mind. "Yes, I do."
"Then we can do it." Jane answered. "I like to think we're doing a good job with Riley, and I think it'd be good for her to have a sibling."
Maura watched Riley on her couch; her feet tucked up on it (with shoes, of course) while she read her book, a content and focused look on her face. "We are doing a good job." Maura whispered. "I just want us to be sure, Jane."
"Will we ever be?"
"No, Jane, that's not what I mean."
"Then what do you mean? Maur, we've talked about this. I thought you wanted another kid!"
"I do!" Maura replied, startled by the anger in her wife's voice. "It's just… We've been talking about it for so long… I guess I didn't expect it to happen like this on a Wednesday afternoon, that's all."
"Maura, are you sure about this?"
Maura sighed and hesitated for a moment, but quickly spoke when she heard a concerned sigh on the other side of the line. "I don't want us to have less time for Riley, that's all. I want to have another child, I do. I really do."
"But Riley needs us." Jane finished for her wife.
"Yes."
"We both have two arms, that's enough to hug two kids." Jane replied, her voice laced with hope. "We both have enough love to love two kids."
Maura smiled at the way Jane always knew exactly how to put her at ease, how to make her stop overthinking things. "You're right. Let's take that girl home."
Two hours later, the entire family sat around the dinner table and Maura was trying to get Lizzie to eat her vegetables.
"I don't like veggies." Lizzie pouted.
"That's too bad, but they're good for you so you have to eat them, honey." Maura replied, holding a fork with a piece of carrot in front of Lizzie's mouth.
"No." Lizzie shook her head and crossed her arms in front of her chest, keeping her lips clamped together.
Maura sighed and lowered the fork on her plate. "Hey, Liz." Riley said, moving her chair a little closer to the little girl. "What if it's an airplane?" She took the fork from Maura and made airplane noises as she brought the fork closer to Lizzie's mouth, but she pulled it back when Lizzie giggled softly, her mouth still closed.
"Or… An ambulance?" Riley made loud siren noises, causing Lizzie to giggle a little louder. "Or maybe… Mom's car?" She made a soft humming noise as she brought the fork closer. "Mom's car doesn't make any noise 'cause it's real fancy," she whispered in Lizzie's ear, eliciting a loud giggle.
Finally, Lizzie opened her mouth and allowed Riley to feed her the carrots. Maura smiled brightly and looked at the other side of the table at her wife sitting opposite her, seeing an equally bright smile. She reached over the table and grabbed Jane's hand, lacing their fingers together and squeezing lovingly as she looked deeply into sparkling brown eyes.
Lizzie ended up eating all her vegetables, allowing Riley to feed her. Maura was delighted and loved to see the sweet interactions between the two. After dinner, Riley helped clearing the dishes and Jane suggested watching a movie, which made both Riley and Lizzie rather happy.
"I wanna watch the lions!"
"The lions?" Maura asked, guiding Lizzie to sit next to her on the couch as she handed Riley the remote, knowing that her daughter was much faster in looking up movies.
"Yeah!" Lizzie jumped up and down on the couch. "With the lions and the big stinky pig!"
Maura heard Riley giggling loudly as she sat down on the other side of her mother. "The Lion King."
"I think 'The Lions And The Big Stinky Pig' is a much better title." Jane laughed as she sat next to Lizzie who was still bouncing on the couch.
Riley kept laughing as she flipped through the movies on the TV, looking for The Lion King. Maura smiled at the beautiful sound of her daughter's laughter and felt tears burning in her eyes when she watched Lizzie climbing on Jane's lap.
Jane gratefully welcomed the small girl in her arms, kissing Lizzie's temple as the girl snuggled closely in Jane's strong arms, resting her back against Jane's front while her gaze focused on the TV as the movie started.
After fifteen minutes, Riley leaned into Maura's side and the doctor gratefully wrapped her arm around her daughter while her other arm was occupied holding Jane's hand, rubbing her wife's knuckles and comforting them in endless love. Maura kissed the top of Riley's head and rested her cheek against the girl's temple as she watched Lizzie focusing intently on the TV, her right thumb sucked in her mouth, Jane's arms securely wrapped around her stomach.
Jane averted her gaze from the TV and looked at Maura, meeting with sparkling hazel eyes that filled with love. She carefully leaned over to capture the blonde's lips in a loving kiss, which Maura happily offered. She looked lovingly in her wife's eyes and squeezed Jane's hand.
"You were right." Jane whispered as she rested her cheek against Lizzie's head. "I fell for her."
Maura smiled and reached up to smooth Lizzie's unruly blond curls. "We all did, Jane."
A/N I know I've updated yesterday, but I just couldn't wait for you guys to meet Lizzie! Please let me know what you think about this turn of events, your reviews make me happy. (Unless they are hurtful and meaningless, which I've received quite a few of lately, please don't do that.) I'd like to point out that English is not my native language, so I appreciate it if you tell me about any grammar mistakes I've made. I'd love to hear what you think of little Lizzie and what you would like to happen!