Chapter 11

Broken Hearts

I hadn't really got anywhere to go now. I didn't want to see the idiot, but I wanted to do something. I was angry with myself and with Shinobu for him acting the way he did but I shouldn't have let it get to me. I headed to the park nearby and sighed softly as I found a bench to sit at. There were so many happy families there playing with each other and it made me feel more lonely then I thought it could. What could I do now? Where could I go? Where was I wanted...needed... Did Usagi-san even miss me? Has he even cared that I left the apartment? What did I care? He didn't care about me, he didn't want to adjust to me when I have to adjust for him...I have to change if he asked me to, or I'd have no right to choose our 'little romance' times. he always made me, I did often enjoy it...but it still wasn't fair that he always chose.

I sat there musing over my thoughts lost deep within the mixture of anger and slight sadness. I hated that I missed him so much. I want Usagi-san to see just how much I cared but I didn't know how much he could see. I wanted to go back and hold him tightly but I had to stick to what I said. I stood slowly too deep in thoughts to know where I was going. I walked slowly through the streets. I didn't know what time it was or where I was but I know I was hungry. I kept wandering till I found a convenience store getting one of the cooked meals. It was getting dark by the time I had finished.

"Just how long have I been away?" My thought came out of my lips as if I had no control over my own body anymore and just as I spoke I heard another voice. There was someone else there but I didn't recognise it. I froze nervous.

"Hey there, what's someone like you doing out in the cold?" The stranger had vibrant red hair styled like a punk and wore a leather jacket and tight jeans. The jacket hid his body and his hands. "Someone like you should be safe and warm in their home, you certainly don't look like you should be on the street. Not wearing nice clothes like that."

Getting a closer look it appeared his clothes seemed dirt and stained and torn. He leaned down and looked into my eyes with a pair of deep blue eyes that looked like they were scanning my heart. He smiled softly and stood up slowly. "Why not come with me? I'd make it worth your while." He laughed softly and held out a rough hand to me. How could I take the hand of a stranger? I knew what he had meant when he said what he did. I wasn't an idiot. I couldn't go with him. I only ever let Usagi-san do anything like that to me. I refused the hand, which seemed to be the wrong decision.

"I get what I want, I always do, whether by force or not." He grabbed my arm and held it too tight to break free of. He pulled me into the shadows of an alleyway where there was no light. He held me against the wall, the cold wall sending shivers down my spine. What could I do? I couldn't fight him, he was holding me down so easily and was too close to kick effectively. I felt fear take over, I shook terrified as his hand slipped along my body. I closed my eyes and imagined. I imagined it was someone else. Someone I hated and loved at the same time. Usagi-san. It was the only thing I could do to stop myself screaming. Suddenly I felt the hand on my wrists be pulled away.

There was a sudden warmth around me. A pair of arms holding me tightly and the sound of someone in pain on the floor. I kept my eyes closed. I hadn't seen who was there. I didn't know who was holding me so tightly but they cared. They were someone that thought about me and wanted to protect me. Slowly I opened my eyes to see silver hair over my face. There was the faint smell of smoke and coffee on his clothes and as I pulled back I saw the rare expression on his face.

"Misaki, why did you make me worry so much? I thought you were going to come back after you'd blown off steam, but when you didn't come back..." he held me close again with that smell of smoke filling my nose. How could I not want that back? That was the smell of Usagi. The mix of smoke and coffee was the smell i had to remind me of him.

"Baka...why..why do you still smell of an ash tray?" Was all I could say as he held me close.