Be careful what you wish for

BPOV

I was leaning against the kitchen counter, a glass of iced tea in one hand and waiting for the noodles to cook. Riley had been going over some paperwork at the kitchen table ever since he got home from work. We hadn't had a chance to talk much yet because of it. I took a sip of my drink and set the glass down beside me just as Riley shuffled the papers together and stood up to put them away in the next room. When he returned he smiled at me and gave me a hug.

"I love you Bella. Sometimes I feel like I don't say it enough." he told me. I smiled back.

"I love you, too Riley" and I gave him a quick kiss.

"Tell me about your day. What have you been up to while I was at work?"

"Not much. I had coffee with Alice and Jasper. Turns out Edward finally stopped ignoring his family and came to visit. And he asked to see me."

I had been thinking about talking to Edward all day. The way he left me made it pretty clear that he had no interest in me whatsoever. So why in the world would he want to see me now? And did I really want to see him again? What would we even talk about if I did? Did he deserve for me to extend him this kindness? And what was it he wanted to talk to me about anyway? Would I be inviting him to just say nasty hurtful things to me again? I sighed.

"So, he ignores his family for years now, comes for one visit and thinks he can just come back into your life, too? Who does he think he is?" Riley asked.

"I don't know why he would want to see me again, anyway. I think it's very confusing to say the least. I just wish I knew what this was about. There is no way I am letting him talk to me like he did back then again. But high school was a long time ago, maybe he's gotten a bit smarter. And do I really want to deny him the chance to at least, I don't know, explain why he thought being such an ass was ok?" I tried to explain my thought process to my husband but he didn't look very happy.

"Are you seriously considering meeting up with him? I mean, it's up to you, but I really don't like the idea. He's hurt you before, what if he does it again?"

"Are you afraid that Edward still affects me like that? That his opinion still matters to me? I love you. We are having a baby. And those two things alone make me so happy. If I talk to Edward, it is for his sake, not mine. Never doubt that." I assured him. My hands move up and down his arms before I wrap my arms around his chest and hug him tightly. When I look up with a smile he leans down to capture my lips in a kiss.

"You make me the happiest man in Chicago" he smiled. "I just want to see you happy." And just like that he made my insides feel all warm and fuzzy again. I was a very lucky woman. Reluctantly I stepped out of our embrace to make sure the pasta wasn't overcooked. I fished out a single spaghetti, cut it in half with my fork and offered one piece to Riley while I tried the other myself. Satisfied with the consistency I drained the noodles and we began setting the table. Once we started eating we resumed our conversation.

"It's just.. this thing with Edward. On the one hand, I don't want to see him. I don't want to talk to him, and I honestly don't know what in the world he wants anyway. But a part of me really wants to tell him, only this once, how much he hurt me. And what an ass he was. But doesn't that make me a bitch? Shouldn't I just let the whole thing go?" I shoved a spoonful of pasta and sauce into my mouth and chewed slowly, giving Riley time to think.

"No, it doesn't make you a bitch. I understand why you would want to do that. And if it makes you feel better, then by all means tell him. But you do not owe him this. If you want to do this, then it should be because you want it. Not because you feel obligated to. If you ask me, he does not deserve this. And I know, he's Alice's brother. You're going to run into him sooner or later. You might as well clear the air. I just really don't want to see you upset about this. And I don't want you to feel pressured."

"Well, I'll think about it. Right now, I really don't feel like seeing him." I sighed.

"Then don't. Easy." He said. "Now let's talk about something else. Your ex is bumming me out."

"Ok.. uh.. oh! I looked through the baby names book!" I said excitedly! His eyes brightened immediately.

"And? Find anything you like?" He smirked. Riley had picked four names he liked very early on and didn't understand why I was having such a hard time picking a name. At our last ultrasound, baby did not reveal the sex, so we were still looking for neutral colors and names for boys and girls.

"No." I groaned. "Alice and Jasper were no help at all. They dissected the book and only suggested terrible and or weird names. But with completely serious faces. It took me a while to figure out they were teasing me. I didn't want to offend them! They were dead set on Nevaeh for a while."

Riley laughed at that. "Well, if you can't decide, we can always use Henry or Cameron for a boy and Grace or Charlotte for a girl. You can pick which one will be the first name."

"I know, I know. You like those. But come on! Henry? Grace?" I whined. I really didn't like his choices and I had no idea how we were going to agree on a name.

"Well then, Cameron and Charlotte it is!" he smiled triumphantly. I could tell by the glint in his eye that he knew it wouldn't be that easy. He was teasing me.

"You might not know this, but it's my kid, too. I get a say in this!" He looked at me with a raised eyebrow. "Ok, how about, after we cleaned the kitchen we curl up on the couch and look at that baby name book together. There's got to be at least one name we both like. He gave me that skeptical look. That I know you're not going to like what I'm going to say next, but I'll say it anyway-look.

"Ok, but promise me, that you won't be angry or annoyed or frustrated if we don't find a name tonight. I don't want some compromise neither of us is completely happy with."

"Fine. Ok. I won't be mad. But at least try to have an open mind. Our kid will not be Henry Cameron or Grace Charlotte."

We agreed on a girl's name that night: Audrey Harper Biers. But in the end it took us three more weeks to finally settle on a boy's name: Harrison Matthew Biers. Naming our baby made becoming a parent that more real. It was no longer 'the baby', the person inside me had a name. Even if we still weren't sure about the sex just yet.

A/N:

I know names are a touchy subject. They are a personal preference and everyone is entitled to their opinion. I also know that I cringe when I read names of original characters on FF and I.. well, let's say strongly dislike them. The names I've chosen (even the ones Bella doesn't like) aren't names I particularly like or dislike. They are not the names of my children. I just googled "top baby names 2011" (because those would be the lists Bella and Riley would see in 2012) and picked some. In this story it makes no sense for Bella to want to name her kid after Carlisle or Esme so I opted for run of the mill "top 100 baby names" names. (Yes, that's a sentence. I promise.) I hope I didn't make you cringe too much and you can still stand this baby. He or she will be cute, I swear!

And Bella still isn't sure if she wants to see Edward or not. Rightly so? Poor Edward? Or Go Bella?

Let me know what you think, I love hearing from you!