Shiloh sat on the crude gurney in Cade's office, swinging her legs as she waited for the stimpak he was preparing at his desk. She grimaced when he displayed the needle to her, prepared to poke her aching shoulder. It had been bothering her since returning from the Glowing Sea. While she was unconscious, her shoulder had to be reset from the weight the animal placed on it when it attacked her.

"There," Cade leaned back when he finished, "you should feel a better range of movement after that. I would say you're fully cleared for the field, so long as you don't go throwing yourself into anymore deathclaws."

"Don't plan on it." It wasn't her first deathclaw. Hell, it wasn't her tenth deathclaw. But she wouldn't repeat that traumatizing experience for the world. She may have a habit of throwing her life away, but that didn't mean she desired being mauled to death. She awkwardly hopped off the gurney, rolling her shoulder now that it didn't hurt so much. Instead of pulling it back up over her white shirt, she tied the arms of her flight suit around her waist and messed with the settings of her Pip-Boy as she headed back to the flight deck.

It was beginning to rain outside. The regular kind. The weather made the vertibird flight to the airport rockier than usual. Shiloh exited the vehicle on shaky legs with a queasy stomach. Ingram grinned when she saw her, "You look a little green."

Groaning, Shiloh ignored her nerves, "How's the frequency search coming?"

Ingram looked less amused now, "It's frustrating working with technology you don't understand. I can't tell if the frequency is changing or if it's just on a level I can't pinpoint. I won't bore you with the technicalities, but all I can tell you is that this feels distinctly Institute. The scan on the microchip detected some kind of frequency for sure. And whatever it is, it's packing a big punch. There's a lot of power involved here. A high level of technology. But I can't give you a location. Not yet."

Shiloh crossed her arms, "For now I guess we can only focus on Ripson's information. There are still quite a few hideouts in the Commonwealth we haven't searched. Mostly because they're feral ghoul and super mutant hives."

"I can see that look in your eye. If you're going to go flying across the wasteland at least take some soldiers in power armor with you."

"I just think it would save on manpower and supplies if I just took them out on my own. Super mutants, feral ghouls, raiders, I've destroyed entire fortresses of them on my own." Shiloh pointed at Ingram, "And that's not bragging. Just facts."

Ingram rolled her eyes, but she still held a grin, "Whatever you say, showoff. But if you think Maxson's going to let his sentinel dive head-first into a nest of monsters you're delusional."

Shiloh chose this moment to grow shy. She played with a buckle on her flight suit instead of looking at Ingram directly. When she looked back up again, Ingram was staring at her with an eyebrow raised. She was half-turned away from her task, now focused on Shiloh's reaction. After a moment of silence, Ingram's eyes widened. Shiloh clenched her fists in defense, "Ingram-"

"Oh boy."

"Don't-"

"You thought you could hide that from me?" Ingram placed her hands on her power armored hips, still wearing an unreadable expression.

Shiloh felt her face redden, "No there's- there's nothing to hide. Can you…" She rubbed her face in exasperation. "Can we talk about something else?"

"After how much shit you gave me about Sarah all those years ago, I'm not dropping this. We'll talk later. For now, find some knight in the best armor in the airport for your crazy journey." Ingram seemed to give no shit about title and rank with Shiloh. Not that Shiloh had given her much pity when she'd been crushing on Elder Sarah Lyons so many years ago. Shiloh regretted her past actions now that the tables were turned on her. Not that she...not that this strange situation with Maxson was the same at all. Shiloh simply wanted to get to know him. Re-learn him as a person. And her new rank provided them both this opportunity. Nothing else to it.

Shiloh still felt clammy as she started an itinerary for her trip in the dining hall. She was scribbling on a piece of paper in her messy handwriting when Haylen sat down across from her. Shiloh noticed that, out of all the knights and standard Brotherhood members, only Haylen and Rhys ever approached her. Everyone else seemed to look at her strange and some of the squires seemed to downright hate her. She hadn't thought children disliked her that much. Shiloh wasn't sure if it was her as a person or her rank as Sentinel. But everyone had loved Nora. She probably just couldn't measure up to the Minutemen General.

Shiloh glared at the paper, writing another list of supplies a little more roughly. Haylen noticed her dark mood, spoon halfway to her mouth, "Rough day?"

"Can you tell me why everyone here stares at me when I'm not looking?"

Haylen shied away a little, "I suppose it's because so many of us are from the Capital Wasteland. And you're the Lone Wanderer. People just don't know what to expect of you. There are so many legends and stories, half of which sound impossible."

Shiloh glanced over at another table in the room, noticing the knights quickly avert their eyes. "I suppose I haven't bothered clearing anything up…"

"Well you shouldn't feel obligated to tell them anything." Haylen continued eating what Shiloh thought might be chopped up tatos, "They're your stories. It's enough that you did all those crazy things. You didn't ask to be placed on a pedestal."

Shiloh smiled gently, setting her pen down, "Thank you. For saying that." She glanced back at her list, having written no names down yet. "I feel uncomfortable asking people to come with me on missions. I'm used to working alone."

"Well you're the Lone Wanderer for a reason. What kind of mission are you planning, ma'am?"

Shiloh grimaced, "I'm going to head into some of the less desirable hiding spots."

Haylen blinked in surprise, "You're voluntarily heading into those places?"

"Er, precisely…"

"You should definitely ask Rhys. Er- excuse me, Paladin Rhys. He always took some sort of enjoyment out of clearing places of monsters. My personal feelings about it aside, he uses it as some sort of stress relief. He might be the better choice to ask. I doubt any scribes would find that sort of task to be interesting."

"You're right. I guess I should present my itinerary to Maxson, see if he approves."

"I always thought sentinels did whatever they wanted as long as they represented the Brotherhood."

"Sarah Lyons's philosophy was always that aentinels should at least have the respect to discuss their missions with their Elder. More of a courtesy than anything. I would hope Maxson doesn't feel too bothered by my asking."

"Oh I would doubt anything you do would bother him, ma'am." When Shiloh blinked in confusion at that, Haylen turned red, "S-Sorry, nevermind. Excuse me." She hurriedly put her tray away and left the dining hall.

Not wanting to chase after the embarrassed scribe, Shiloh took her paper and pen and headed to the command deck. To her surprise, Maxson wasn't surrounded by knights or discussing something with Kells for once. He was simply staring out the large window, an unlit cigarette in his hand.

Shiloh approached, stopping in the middle of the observation room, "Elder Maxson."

He turned to her, not surprised to be broken from whatever he was thinking. He put the cigarette he was messing with away, "What is it, Sentinel?"

"I thought you might like to review my itinerary for a mission to one of the local hospitals. It was pointed out by Ripson, but listed as a hotbed for feral ghoul activity."

"I'm not surprised you want to take on one of these locations, but you don't need to ask my permission. You're free to represent the Brotherhood as you please." So his relationship with his sentinel was more on par with the western elders.

Shiloh straightened a little, "I don't mean to bother you with this. I just wanted to involve you despite my rank."

Maxson gave her an almost-smile, "Sarah's philosophy. It's no bother, I simply want you to know your options with me. Whatever you need, you may have it." He took the list she held out to him, staring blankly at it for a bit too long.

"Is something wrong with it?"

He looked up at her, expression blank, "I can't read this."

Shiloh took a step closer, taking the list back quickly, "My handwriting isn't that bad!"

"Sentinel, it's terrible," he was pressing her buttons, she knew it. And she blushed just like he wanted.

Shiloh played with the edges of the paper, feeling like she was the younger one of the two, "It's just a list of supplies. With power armor underlined. Not for me, of course. Ingram wants me to take some knights with me."

"I would hope you were planning on doing so from the beginning." He sighed at Shiloh's guilty expression.

She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, "I don't know anyone besides Paladin Rhys who would want to go."

"It's not a matter of want."

"Of course, but it's easier to have soldiers who thrive in killing huge nests of creatures."

"I suppose," he scratched at his beard. Shiloh wondered absently why he wore it so long. It made him look older.

She glanced behind the Elder at the open city skyline, "What were you looking at?"

"I wasn't looking. I was thinking." Shiloh blinked at him, silently asking what about. "I'm just anticipating seeing the Capital Wasteland from that window."

She nodded, "I can't wait to be home, too. I have so many people to see again. I thought about it and I'm considering seeing Harkness in Rivet City first. It's not far from the Citadel and it would be nice to see him again."

"Harkness. I know that name."

"He's Head of Security there," Shiloh broke eye contact with him, "an old friend of mine…"

He picked up on the unspoken language there. She knew he did. But before he could ask, they were interrupted by a star paladin's appearance on the command deck.

"Find Paladin Rhys and gather your men. I'll have Tegan prepare supplies for you and you can get with him later." Maxson looked at the star paladin, "I called for you hours ago."

Shiloh left as the soldier stammered out his apologies. She headed down to the main deck to find Rhys.

-0-

She tied the bandana around her mouth, just below the goggles covering her eyes. This way, she could still speak while protecting herself from the oncoming gore, "Save ammo whenever you can. The bigger ones can be bullet sponges. Don't worry about stealth, they can smell us the moment we enter the hospital. Cutting," Shiloh held up the ripper in her hands, "is better than bashing. No guarantee they'll stay down unless you cut through them. Most importantly, stay behind me and don't panic."

Rhys and the three knights with them nodded in their power armor. Shiloh, of course, chose modified combat armor on top of her flight suit instead. She probably looked more Gunner than soldier in her getup, but how she looked would make no difference to a nest of ferals.

The feral ghouls were different in the Commonwealth. She couldn't pinpoint exactly how, but they were a little swifter, a little smarter than the roaming corpses in the Capital Wasteland. They were louder here, though, which would make taking them down easier.

It was unlikely that the hospital would house any of the Institute scientists, but it was pointed out by Ripson and would be checked thoroughly regardless. If nothing, there were probably supplies and technology to be salvaged here.

Shiloh only activated the ripper when a feral was directly in sight or, in some close cases, directly on her. A few tried flanking her, but she was able to dispatch them quickly. It only became a problem when they cleared out the lower floors of the hospital. There were more ferals down there than Shiloh had ever seen in one place.

Luckily for her, the soldiers Rhys had picked for her were calm and collected throughout the mission. A large group of them began gathering around the soldiers, separating Shiloh from the rest. She sliced through two or three at once as Rhys did the same, trying to get to her.

They were surprised to hear a sudden distinct growl. From the back of the group, a Glowing One appeared, something Shiloh hadn't expected or accounted for. Outside of where her combat armor protected, she had little protection from its radiation bursts.

Distracted as she avoided one of its blasts, Shiloh tripped on one of the many feral corpses and went down just as another feral screamed and threw itself on top of her. It snapped its jaws around her jugular, catching its teeth on her jaw as she turned her head. Shiloh struggled to get the ripper that was trapped between them. She couldn't activate it would risking disemboweling herself along with the feral.

Rhys, seeing the situation getting out of hand, pulled out his laser rifle and began blasting away at the ferals. The Glowing One went down once the others followed his lead. He shot the feral off Shiloh before roughly helping her to her feet.

Shiloh ripped the goggles and bandana off her sweaty face, taking a look at the huge pile of bodies, "Shit."

"Shit is right, let's see where it got you." Rhys examined Shiloh's face, telling her that the only damage was a few bloody tooth marks along her jaw and neck. They would scar, but the feral hadn't taken any flesh off her. The group sighed in relief. "Jesus, I hate melee attacks. But we did lose a lot of ammo."

She sighed, kicking over a feral body, "Might as well see what's salvageable in here."

They left the hospital with a large haul of medical supplies and all information from the terminals downloaded onto holotapes for Quinlan. Shiloh even found a stack of technical documents. Nothing indicated the Institute or really anything recent, but there were more medical supplies hidden away in there than usual. It might indicate that the hospital was occupied earlier than 200 years ago, but Shiloh couldn't say for sure.

It was a few hours till daylight and the group opted for sitting down until sunrise. Their haul was too important to risk traveling at night with. They sat around a campfire. The knights and Rhys were able to stretch outside of their power armors during the break.

Rhys was helping Shiloh apply gauze to her face under the campfire light. She flinched every time he placed a sterilized swab across the tooth marks. Rhys wasn't the kindest or most patient medic, but he was able to stop her squirming long enough to treat her properly. He offered to inject a stimpak into her face, but she quickly shut down that idea.

"I never congratulated you on your promotion, Paladin," Shiloh's voice was slightly slurred under the swelling in her face.

Rhys gave her what might have been a small smile, "I didn't want a big deal to be made of it. I worked under a man for a long time who taught me that it was an honor to be a Paladin, but not something to let get to your head."

"You still call him a man?"

Rhys didn't bother pretending not to know what she was talking about, "Surprised? Part of me...most of me hates him, it, whatever, but Elder Maxson clarified that he didn't know what he was while he was in the Brotherhood. We went through hell at that police station, lost good soldiers. He held us together, when we thought we were going to give up. So maybe, maybe for just that brief period of time, he was a man."

Shiloh nodded, wondering how Nora would feel to hear his words. But she knew things between Rhys, Haylen and Nora weren't the same since Danse was...executed. Rhys seemed to hold no hatred or animosity for Maxson. Shiloh wondered why Danse being a synth had to matter so much. Especially if it was concluded that he wasn't even aware of it. But that was something she couldn't bring up to Rhys. She would have to work up the courage to finally speak to Maxson about this.

When daylight came and the group arrived at the Prydwen, they transferred the haul between Cade, Quinlan, and Teagan. Quinlan was pleasantly surprised by the large stack of technical documents from the hospital. Any medical information not useful to Quinlan could be transferred to Cade.

Everyone seemed to ignore the gauze on Shiloh's jaw and neck until they got to Cade. He peeled it back, commending Rhys's medical skills, before telling Shiloh it should heal within the week.

When it was time for Shiloh to report to Maxson, he wasn't on the command deck. Kells spotted her standing around and directed her to the far end of the flight deck. She was surprised to find the Elder smoking by himself. It was early morning and he looked as tired as usual, but his jacket was pristine again. She chose to watch him for a while, just taking in how much he had changed. While this certainly wasn't the time or place to have a personal talk, Shiloh allowed herself this moment to indulge in the past. He was turned away from her, but she knew about how his eyes looked bruised from lack of sleep. He'd grown so tall and strong. Rigorous training had been as kind to him as it had been punishing. Shiloh was overwhelmed with the urge to comfort him in some way. Which surprised her, considering she wasn't much of the comforting type. And she wasn't sure he would want anything to do with that.

He was staring down at Fort Strong when she tentatively approached, "Don't mind the gauze, had a bit of an incident."

He sighed, seeming to prepare himself when he turned to her. He continued smoking, despite her presence, "What kind of incident?"

Shiloh found it hard to not buckle under his piercing blue gaze, "A feral ghoul bit me in the face."

He seemed to soften then. Not quite in posture, but certainly in voice, "Will it scar?"

Shiloh seemed to realize the situation they were in right now and her breath caught in her throat. They both remembered many years ago when Maxson sat in a hospital bed, gauze on his face. Shiloh's eyes drifted to his scar, wondering if he still blamed her for that deathclaw attack. She suddenly felt a tightening in her chest, "Yes, but not much."

He must have seen the panic in her face, because he took another drag from his cigarette, "Any success on the mission?"

"Just a lot of medical supplies. Nothing so far, but we'll know more once Quinlan examines the holotapes."

"I see," he seemed deep in thought, not giving her his full attention anymore. His distance fried her nerves and she backed away from his place on the flight deck.

"I'll go see if Quinlan needs anything." He didn't respond to her, still glaring out at Fort Strong.

She gripped the cold metal wall of the hallway once she was back inside the Prydwen. It was the only thing holding her up. Enough is enough. There was no way she could go on dancing around these subjects with Maxson. If he was trusting her to be his sentinel, she would have to trust him enough to be honest with him.

She grabbed the map from her quarters, staring at the writing with a new resolve. She would talk to Maxson. If he hated her underneath his professionalism as an Elder, it was best that they finally cleared the air between them.