Maggie moved her carryon bag off the seat she had been saving for Steve as he sat down next to her, handing her two bottles of water, one for now and one for their flight. "Merry Christmas," he said with a wink.
"Thank you," she replied with a sigh. "We really didn't get to have a very nice Christmas yesterday with all the packing in my apartment. I'm sorry."
He tucked his water inside his carry on that Bridgette had retrieved from her parent's house two weeks earlier. "I'm not. We'll celebrate with a nice walk on the beach tonight after dinner in Waikiki," he promised. He knew Danny was flying out later that same day but now they had different flights. He had changed his to accommodate a seat with Maggie.
He sat back checking his phone for messages.
"Steve?" Maggie asked looking over at him.
"Yeah," he replied, flipping over the incoming emails, hoping to see one from Danny, but knew he wouldn't.
"Steve," she said again, wanting his attention.
He glanced over at her, giving her what she wanted.
She paused before she replied, throwing it out there one last time before they boarded the plane for Hawaii.
"Last chance," she smiled watching for his reaction.
His expression turned perplexed, "For what?"
"To change your mind."
He knew then where this topic was headed, assuming it was behind them, deciding then and there to leave it in New York once and for all.
"Why? Have you, Maggie? Have you changed your mind about going with me?"
She shook her head, not having any doubt at all. "No. I just want to…"
"Then don't ask me that again, because if you haven't changed your mind then this conversation is a waste of time, now and in the future. Ok?" he said with a smile yet firmly, wanting to get his point across.
She bent her head, grinning as she nodded, "Ok, point taken."
He reached up and moved the hair that was covering her face so he could see it. "I love you. I want you with me for as long as you can stand me. I'm not going to now, nor will I ever again make excuses for you and I, to anyone. I know what happened between us and I'm not ashamed of it. Are you?"
He had her full attention now as she shook her head. "No."
"We fell in love, period. It's no ones business how it happened, or why, or that if it was too soon, we know what we know, and that's all that matters."
She never would again from that moment on question him again on that topic. She was exactly where she was supposed to be, knowing well that he was too.
"I love you too," she replied as she leaned over and kissed him.
She knew that he was speaking of Danny when he said he would never make excuses for them again. It had been over two weeks since the incident at the William's home, but it had also been that long since the two men had spoken.
She looked over at him again as he continued to scan through his phone, replying to a message. She knew of the two attempts that he had made in contacting Danny; both of them went unanswered. He'd said his peace in a voicemail, but not once apologizing for their relationship, deciding that it was Danny's move going forward. He confided in her then that he wouldn't make another attempt to contact him. The big issue he faced now over their estrangement was his job. She knew well enough that they either had to come to an end to this feud or one of them had to quit. She hoped and prayed it wasn't the latter of the two.
She herself had even made an attempt to speak with Danny, but the minute he heard her voice on the phone he hung up. She decided then that they were both just as stubborn as they claimed the other to be.
The plane pulled away from the gate within minutes of its scheduled time. Maggie sat in the middle row allowing Steve the window seat. She felt a slight sadness over leaving her home and Bridgette behind, but couldn't help but feel the excitement over finally making the move she had been planning for months.
He leaned over just then and whispered to her, "I can't wait to get home, not because I miss it, but because you're the one thing that's always been missing from it."
Maggie reached over and took his hand, wrapping her fingers through his. "This is the beginning of a whole new life for me, for both of us."
He lifted her hand up to his mouth, kissing the back of it as he grinned and winked at her, letting her know he was completely on board with her.
She was healthy, in love, but most of all she was the happiest she'd been her whole life.
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Steve rolled over in his bed, waking up after his first night home. He felt the empty space next to him and at the same time he smelled a pleasing aroma coming from downstairs.
He smiled as he got up, stepping over his opened suitcase and went to his dresser, pulling out a pair of sweats and slipping them on over his naked body.
He came down the steps seeing Maggie busily moving around in his kitchen. It was a beautiful sight in more ways than one.
"Good morning, " he said coming off the bottom step.
Maggie turned around with a spatula in her hand, her expression anything but pleased to see him. "No! Go back upstairs to bed!" she ordered, shooing him away with the spatula.
"What?" he laughed.
"Go!" she waved again to the upstairs, "Go back up and get in bed!"
"Why?" he asked, backing up as she came toward him.
"Because," she whined, "just do it, please!"
"Ok," he chuckled. "Is this going to be like the bathtub where you tell me to take my clothes off and get in?" he teased, "because I liked the way that ended."
Maggie rolled her eyes, "If you go upstairs and get in bed it just might, so you better hurry."
She laughed as he turned and sprinted up the stairs two at a time.
He came back in the bedroom and picked up his suitcase, closing it and moving it out the way and got back in bed as ordered. It was their first morning together in his home, which he considered hers now as well for as long as she wanted. He could feel the shift in his life as he glanced around his bedroom, seeing her suitcase across the way and some of her cosmetics and perfume bottles that used to sit on her dresser in New York that were now sitting on his. It was cluttered and he knew it was going to take some getting used to, sharing his room and house, but he couldn't have been more willing or pleased to do so.
He wished he had another day to spend with her before going back to work. Their flight the day before had arrived early enough that they were able to go to downtown Waikiki and have dinner and a nice stroll on the beach after sunset as promised. She assured him they would have plenty of time to explore and see all the places he wanted her too, not complaining in the least, which only assured him he had made the right decision in bringing her home with him. She was not only easy on the eyes, but she was also so easy to get along with.
She came in the bedroom a couple of minutes later carrying a tray and a wide smile. "Good morning," she said, keeping her eyes on the tray of food as she approached the bed.
He sat up, leaning against the headboard. "I like having you around," he said happily while she set the tray of pancakes, bacon and orange juice on his lap and then leaned over giving him a kiss.
"Breakfast is served." She sat down on the mattress next to him. "Is this as good an ending as the bathtub incident?"
He reached out putting a hand on her bare leg that was sticking out from her robe, "Close, very, very close." He patted the vacant spot next to him on the other side. "Get over here," he said, picking up a piece of bacon and taking a bite.
She came around the other side and climbed in next to him, scooting over and resting her head on his shoulder while he gave her a bite of his bacon.
"No one has ever made me breakfast in bed before," he admitted. "Thank you."
"You're welcome. I've never made breakfast in bed for anyone before."
"So I'm your first?"
She chuckled, "The virgin host."
He smiled over that reply before taking a bite of pancakes. "These are good. I'm not sure how you managed to whip this up. I haven't been home for three weeks. I didn't even know I had orange juice."
"There was some in your freezer and the bacon in the fridge was still ok. I was thinking I'd go grocery shopping today while you were at work. You just need to drop me at the car rental place."
"Ok, but we should look into getting you a car," he suggested, giving her a bite of pancake. "Car rental in Hawaii is expensive."
"I know. I had researched that and was going to visit a couple of car lots."
"The HPD has a bulletin that they put out every couple of weeks with stuff for sale. We might be able to find you a nice car from that."
"Ok." She scooted back on her knees so she could face him. "How are you feeling about going to work today?" she asked, broaching the subject that had been in both of their thoughts over the past two weeks.
Steve sighed heavily, setting down the fork on the plate. "Unsure. I don't know what's going to happen." He took the tray and set it on the nightstand by the bed.
"I've made a decision though," he said, reaching out and touching her hand.
She could tell by the hesitant look on his face that she wasn't going to like it. "What decision?"
He squeezed her hand as if not wanting her to escape once he told her. "If Danny and I can't settle this thing, then I'm resigning from my job."
She was right she didn't like it. She pulled her hand away and scooted off the bed. "No! God Steve, you can't do that."
"Hey!" He got up, going to her as she stood at the foot of the bed with her hands over her face shaking her head. "Its fine," he reassured her. "I've already thought it through. It's not a decision I made this morning when I woke up."
She slid her hands down, looking at him but her expression still didn't show that she understood. This choice was heartbreaking to her. "You love your job. This is awful."
"I love what I do," he explained, "and I can keep on doing it, just not in the same position that I am now. There are other areas of HPD that I can move to and still do the job that I love."
She closed her eyes, still not convinced. "I just feel like this is all my…"
"Stop!" he said angrily, "Stop right there! I'm sick and tired of hearing you blame this on yourself. This is between Danny and me. If he can't accept the fact that you and I are together then that's his problem, and I'm not going to bring his problem into our relationship anymore." He put his hands on her shoulders, letting her know he wasn't angry with her, even though his tone might have expressed that. "Let's just see what happens today. It's been two weeks, I'm sure he's had time to calm down and let it settle. I bet by the end of the day," he smiled, "he and I will be right back where we were before, partners."
She felt a little more at ease over that, hoping the same thing. "I hope so."
He pulled her in, hugging her. "Don't worry about it. It'll be fine one way or another." He leaned back so he could see her face. "Whatever happens, happens, we can't control it, just like we couldn't control this." He smiled before he kissed her.
She put her arms around him, feeling that comforting embrace that she had already come to rely on, knowing he was right about it not being in their control anymore. It was all up to Danny now and his willingness to forgive and forget.
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Steve sat in the parking lot of work, staring at Danny's vacant parking spot. He knew his flight had got in the day before the same as he and Maggie's, and that they were both due back to work that morning. He was usually the first one in on days that they drove separately, hoping that was the case today and not that he wasn't coming in at all, or ever again.
He didn't even know if Chin and Kono knew of the fight between them. He shook his head at the magnitude it had grown into. They were grown men acting like teenage girls. They'd had their dispute, fought it out and now it was time to move on. That's the way boys did it and that's the way he was going to face it.
He got out and went inside.
"Hey!" Kono called out from her office as he came through the doors. "Welcome back!" She met him out in the hallway as he came toward her.
"Hey Kono, did you miss me?"
"Of course," she said giving him a hug. "It's been way to quiet around here."
He glanced over toward Danny's office as he hugged her back. "Have you seen Danny yet this morning, wondering still if she knew of their fight."
"No. I thought he'd come in with you."
He shook his head and was about to ask about Chin when he came around the corner from the hall where the restrooms were located.
"Hey! Looky there, the Big Kahuna made it back in one piece from the Big Apple."
"Hey, Chin," Steve chuckled, reaching out his hand as they did a 'bro' hand shake, pulling each other in for a quick hug with it.
"Welcome back."
They slapped each other on the back and Steve was about to ask the same question to Chin about Danny when it was answered for him.
"Hey, Danny!" Chin and Kono both announced as he came in the entrance.
The two of them barely made eye contact as he came forward, all smiles and happy greetings for Chin and Kono though. He couldn't get a read on him but was glad nonetheless that he had even shown up.
Danny let go of Kono and looked up at Steve, motioning to his office. "You got a second?"
Steve nodded, trying to read the unemotional expression on Danny's face. "Sure."
Danny walked toward Steve's office feeling like he'd come to terms with he and Maggie's affair, wanting to leave the fight back in New York and move on, it was the lying that he was still having a problem with. Every time he tried to forgive and forget, the betrayal from it would sting reminding him once again of Rachel's deception, never in a million years anticipating that Steve could do the same thing to him. It was a very, very large pill to swallow and every time he tried, his anger would close up his throat.
Steve spoke to Chin and Kono before following Danny over to his office. "Give us a quick minute and then you can brief us on what you guys have been working on."
He came in his office, closing the door as Danny stood in front of his desk with his back to him. He didn't go to his chair behind the desk, not wanting this to seem official because it wasn't, it was all personal.
"How's you're Mom and Dad?" Steve asked, stopping behind him.
Danny looked over his shoulder and then turned, backing up against Steve's desk, crossing his arms while he stared at his feet. "Fine."
"Did they get those tickets I sent them?" Steve asked, crossing his arms as well, both men seeming as if they were standing their ground.
Danny sighed, "Yes," he finally looked up at him, "they went and I'm sure they had a lovely time, I didn't ask."
Steve could hear the sarcasm as well as see it all over him now, deciding to just let him say what he wanted to say. "So?"
Danny shrugged, "So?"
"I'm here."
"So am I."
Steve huffed, "Well now that we have our geographical positions acknowledged maybe we could act like men and get this thing settled."
"So settle it," Danny replied.
"Me?" Steve pointed at his chest. "What do you want me to say that I haven't already?"
"What do you want me to say?! That I'm sorry for punching you?" he said sarcastically.
"Yes, for a start."
Danny pushed off the desk, "Seriously with that? You don't think you deserved it for what you did? You didn't even try and block it, so don't tell me you didn't deserve it!"
"Fine," Steve threw his hands up, "I deserved it, ok? But I'm not going to apologize for what happened a third time and I'm certainly not going to apologize for Maggie's and my relationship to you or anyone else. So if that's what you're waiting for then we've got nothing to talk about."
"You're still denying that you did anything wrong!" he yelled.
"No I'm not! I shouldn't have lied to you, I admit that, and that's where my mistake lies, but that's it," he said,
"Look," Danny sighed heavily, caving in to the pigheadedness. "It's done. We both have a job to do so let's just do it." He waved his hands as if telling him it was over. "She's three thousand miles away back in New York. I don't know what your plans are…"
"She's here," Steve blurted out, following through with his plans not to lie or make excuses for he and Maggie anymore, especially to Danny.
The expression on his face turned to shock and then bitterness as he tightened his lips together. "Really? Where is she right now?"
"At my house. She's staying with me."
"For how long?"
Steve shrugged, "As long as she wants. So far she's made no plans to find a place."
Danny nodded, thinking he had come to terms with their relationship, but in truth he hadn't now that it was thrown in his face once again. He began to taste the bitterness that he had when he'd first found out. Worse yet, once Chin and Kono found out the humiliation of it would be twice fold. "Ok then."
"Ok what?" Steve asked, wanting to know if he still felt the same about putting it behind them now that he knew she was here.
"I don't know, whatever. I got work to do."
"So that's it. Are we good?"
"Yeah, whatever. Congratulations."
"This wasn't a competition, Danny. There's no winner here."
He pushed off the desk and went past him, "Yes there is and you win. You got the girl. Congratulations. I hope you two live happily ever after." He stood at the door with it open, glancing back at him. "We got work to do, are you coming?" his voice was neither civil nor patient.
"Yep," Steve replied in the same tone, walking past him out to the common area deciding then that it was Danny's problem from that moment on, not his.
He was relieved that they had no real case on the table at the moment so all four of them settled in their offices as they decided to clean up old case files from the past year before starting the new one. He was surprised at the amount of paperwork that had been sidelined as new cases came in. But the overall year was a good one. They had solved fourteen murders and three more that were old ones on the HPD books, four robberies and six drug related cases that had ended up shutting down a meth lab that was accounting for twenty percent of the island's habit. They had a good year by law enforcement standards. Not one case was left open. He was more proud of that than anything else.
He looked out his office door at the other three who busied themselves with their own paperwork and stacks of files on their desks, knowing the accomplished year couldn't have been done without their involvement and help. He appreciated all of them and only hoped they could continue on with the great work they'd been doing. He and Danny's strained relationship was the only falter in the chain that had once been strong and secure.
He blamed himself over his lack of judgment in keeping he and Maggie's affair a secret. It would be something he would always regret, but he felt he'd done all he could to remedy it, he just hoped that Danny would come around and see that too.
Danny looked over his computer screen into Steve's office, letting out a deep, agitated sigh. He focused back on the screen, looking over open positions within the HPD departments, seeing one that looked promising as he read over the description. When he was done he sat back in his chair staring at the screen, hating what he was doing but hating even more the position Steve had put him in now at this job. He couldn't believe he'd brought her home with him. He would have actually been more forgiving if she would have waited the time lot that she had first initiated and then came, at least then he would have had time to adjust to her being there, but no, he thought angrily, they had to keep throwing it in his face and not only that 'she's living with him', he growled under his breath.
He looked up just then seeing Chin at his door with a file.
"You ok?" he chuckled over the frustrated attitude, "Its just paperwork. Don't get all worked up over it."
Danny closed his laptop, so Chin wouldn't see what he had actually been looking at. "Next year I swear I'm tying up lose ends as they come in."
Chin laughed, "Didn't we both say that last year?"
Danny smiled, "What do you got?" he asked, pointing at the file.
"I need yours and Steve's John Hancock on this form." He walked over to the desk and set the file down, opening it up and showing the place for him to sign.
He reached over taking a pen from the multi colored ceramic cup that Gracie had made for him when she was in second grade. He signed the form and put it back in the file.
"So," Chin said, "I was kind of expecting more details about your guys' trip other than 'it was fine'," he mimicked Danny's voice.
Danny shrugged, "Not much to tell; a lot family time and just hanging out. It snowed a lot."
Chin narrowed his eyebrows as if that was the most boring answer ever, "Ok then." He picked up the file, "Hurray for the Big Apple."
Steve looked up as Chin now stood at his door holding the same file.
"You got a sec to sign something?"
"Sure," he moved his laptop out of the way. "What do you got?"
He repeated the move he had made in Danny's office, pointing to the blank line. "Sign there."
Steve pulled a pen from the coffee cup on his desk that had a picture of Gracie on it that she had given him for Christmas two years before.
Chin looked down at him as he signed it. "So, how was the trip? Did you guys do anything besides sit and stare at the snow?"
Steve smiled as he dropped the pen back in the cup. "It did snow a lot, and it was cold. Damn it was cold!"
"Did you bring back any souvenirs of your great adventure in the snow and ice?"
Steve thought of Maggie, wanting to say he found a treasure, but just shook his head. "No. I did get to see the Statue of Liberty, Times Square, Central Park and I saw a really cool Christmas concert in an outside venue, while it was snowing."
Chin smiled, finally getting something from them. "Nice! So you had a good time then?"
"I did."
"Danny makes it sound like you guys never left the house."
Steve shrugged, "He used to live there, I guess the excitement of it doesn't effect him."
"I guess so." He picked up the folder. "I'm glad you had a good time."
Steve glanced past Chin as he left, seeing the top of Danny's head in his office across the way. They'd managed to keep their fight hidden from Chin and Kono so far. Neither of them suspected anything different other than that maybe they were keeping their distance because they had just spent three weeks together, which was fine by him. They didn't need to know about it nor did they need to know the logistics of it either. He wasn't proud of the way he handled it and he was quite certain that Danny didn't want the story of Maggie getting out either.
It would eventually blow over, he thought, or more liked hoped anyway.
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Steve came up his driveway seeing a yellow Jeep parked in his spot. He pulled in next to it and smiled at her choice of rental cars, wondering if she had an adventurous side to her that he had yet to discover. He recalled that she wasn't into sports, which was fine. There weren't many sporting events on the island anyway, but his only concern was if her sporting dislike crossed over to recreational athleticism all together. He was big on hiking, surfing and kayaking hoping to share in some of those activities with her. They'd only talked briefly about them and she'd never given him the impression that she didn't want to, hoping she wasn't just appeasing him.
He came in the house and saw a bouquet of fresh cut flowers from his backyard sitting on the coffee table that filled the room with a clean fresh scent. An even better aroma hit him just then coming from the kitchen.
"Hello?" he called out as Maggie appeared at the back door with some cooking tongs in her hand.
"Hi," she smiled brightly coming toward him.
He motioned to the tongs, "You're cooking again, should I go upstairs and get in bed?" he teased.
Maggie laughed as she reached up and kissed him. "No, not this time, but after you see what I'm making for dinner, you might carry me up afterward."
He put an arm around her waist as he followed her into the kitchen. "Something smells really good."
He went to the backdoor, seeing the grill on as she went to the stove and took the lid off a small pan and stirred the contents.
"Filet Mignon," she said, "with Béarnaise sauce and asparagus."
He looked over at her with a wide grin, "Wow! What did I do to deserve this?"
She put the lid back on and went over to him, kissing him once again before going out back. "It's just because I love you."
He held on around her waist so she couldn't get away, pulling her back up against him, looking at her tenderly. "Have I told you that I like having you around?"
"Yes," she replied happily, "and I'm going to make sure you keep that thought too."
"You don't have to cook for me or anything else to make me feel that you know."
"I know. Can't I just do it because I want to?"
He kissed her for that, "Yes, thank you."
"You're welcome." She patted him on the butt. "Now go get comfy and do whatever it is that you do after coming home from work and dinner will be ready in about ten minutes."
He watched as she went back outside to tend to the grill, loving the content feeling he had with her being there. He'd never been in more of a hurry to get home as he had been that day. Wishing more than ever that he could share his good fortune with Chin and Kono but still felt that it would almost be insulting to Danny if he brought it up the first day. He by no means wanted to hide Maggie, feeling proud or her and their relationship but it was a catch-22 where he and Danny now stood. Their friendship had changed over night and he just didn't want to do anything right now to rock the boat that was already weathering a storm.
Maggie sat down by the water on a blanket drinking a glass of wine. She heard the screen door close and glanced over her shoulder as Steve came toward her.
"It's so nice," she said to him, "to be able to sit outside four days before New Years in a tank top and shorts." She motioned to the view even though it was after sunset. The lights coming from his and the neighbor's homes lit up the ocean in front of them. "Look at that. It is paradise."
He sat down next to her, picking up the bottle of wine and pouring himself a glass. "Yep, just wait until you see it up close. I know some places that will knock your socks off. You'll think you died and went to heaven."
His statement was meant as nothing more than a cliché, but anytime that word was thrown around it was a reminder that even though she felt 100%, she wasn't. They had never really talked about her condition in detail. Never having that precise moment when it seemed the right time, but as she sat there with him now, she wondered when that time would ever be, because it never seemed like the right time to talk about something so depressing when they were both so very happy.
Her email earlier that day from Dr. Pakdman had reminded her to seek out one of the doctors that she had suggested and not to put it off just because she was feeling well. She also reminded her that catching the growth early was their biggest ally against fighting it.
She glanced over at him as he spoke of a hike up some old train trestles on the other side of the island, explaining the effort to get to the top, but the view was worth every difficult step. She smiled but her focus was more on him than the hike, deciding then that it still wasn't the right time to talk about it. Just having him next to her gave her a feeling of warmth and security that she never had with another person, not even her ex husband whom she thought she loved, but that love was nothing in comparison to the one that was growing with Steve. It seemed to blossom more and more each day, wondering when and if it had an end.
"I'm so glad I'm here with you," she said out of the blue.
He stopped mid sentence and looked over at her as she stared at him in a way that resembled the same look she would have when they were making love. He felt the impact of it and her words shoot through him, warming him. It was sincere, spoken from the heart.
"Do you ever wonder," he asked in the same heartfelt way, "how it came to be between us? I mean, not the way it happened, but why? I believe in fate Maggie, and I believe that there's a reason that you and I are here now, feeling what we do for each other. I don't know what that reason is or if it's just a simple gift from God, but I don't think it was just luck that brought us together. It's as if it we're meant to be."
She felt tears spring to life in her eyes, "We need each other. We're two people who based their lives on never needing anyone, but we need each other."
In his opinion, no words had ever been spoken truer than those. He reached over taking her hand, "I'll never leave you, Maggie. I'm not saying we won't have our moments and that life might throw us some curves, but one thing that you will never have to fear, and that's me leaving. I'll never do it."
She squeezed his hand. "I'll never leave you either. I promise."
They didn't need rings or an audience of witnesses or even a preacher to know that their commitment to one another was for life, in sickness or in health.