So sorry it's taken so long to update. I've been sick and haven't had a chance to catch up on my writing. Forgive me!

Here's 11 along with the usual disclaimer. ;)

(CHAPTER ELEVEN)

I couldn't remember anything that happened in first, second, or third period to save my life. I had gotten zero sleep the night before and my mind was on a thousand different things; school and basic social skills weren't among them. I practically fell asleep over my bowl of chicken soup during lunch. Edward picked up a bread roll and threw it at my head. I came awake with a jerk and nearly used the soup as a weapon to attack him. He chortled under his breath when I dropped the soup and it splattered all over me. Thankfully we were tucked away at a table in the corner so no one saw my mishap. "Cut it out!" I snapped at him, shaking bread crumbs from my hair and wiping noodles from my shirt, discretely pulling the hot liquid back into the bowl.

Bella tried to hide a smile too, but I could feel the overall tension between the lovers. Edward had clearly told her about the lost future and she was miffed with him for some reason. Probably for not telling her sooner. I'd be the same… only probably with more anger. In fact, now looking closer, Edward, Alice, and Bella all seemed preoccupied with inner worries which suited me just fine. I had things to do and I didn't need my super-powered siblings breathing down my neck. "So." I said casually, "I need a ride to La Push to get the spare car back home. It's still sitting there in the parking lot. Bells, I was wondering if you would take me?"

She looked up in surprise, but didn't refuse, thankfully. "Sure. I'd be happy to."

I smiled. "Thanks." Edward glared at me. "What?" I asked defensively. "It's not like you can take me. And I'm too exhausted to walk from the boarder all the way to the beach."

"I don't think it's a good idea-" He started.

"Oh, okay." I said, sarcasm dripping from my tone. "Why don't you just run over there and get the car yourself then? I'm sure the werewolves won't notice you skip across the boarder right into the heart of their town."

Edward sighed impatiently like he was talking to a child. And since there was nearly a hundred year age different between us, technically he was. "Fine, but don't go looking for a fight, Ivy." He said sternly.

I raised an eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?" I wasn't that violent.

He leaned in, dropping his voice, "It means I don't need my human sister picking a fight to defend us against some insults flung by a werewolf cub. He'll get over his dislike for us a lot sooner than you think if you just give him time."

I sat back and crossed my arms. I wasn't planning on picking a fight with Jake, but it was better if he thought that was my mission. No need for my family to dissuade me from using magic to fix this little problem. "Sure, sure." I mimicked Jake's casual phrase and he rolled his eyes.

"Promise, Ivy?" Bella said, the idea of me fighting making her nervous.

"Cross my heart." I swore, standing to dump my tray of food. The bell rang and I was off to my next period. Everyone was asking me why I was out of school for so long. I used Carlisle's suggested flu excuse and people seemed to buy it. Art was my last subject of the day and I thought it was a godsend when Mrs. Goddard announced we'd be working with watercolors. The class of eight set up easels in a circle in the large room, all facing inwards and spaced far apart for privacy. There was a bowl of fruit in the center, but Goddard always told us we were allowed to paint 'whatever your heart tells you.'

I dipped my brush in the water, then picked a deep shade of blue, my mind suddenly going to a place far away and long gone. It may have looked like my brush was making the color transfer to the thick, art paper, but it was actually my powers. Color after color, stroke after stroke, the scene slowly took shape. When the hour was up, I sat back and wiped my hands on a stained cloth and stared at the near-perfect depiction of my childhood home. On the page was a single-story, white bungalow with a huge magnolia tree out front and a sandbox peeking around the side. The sky was vast and blue and one of the clouds drifting past looked suspiciously like a rabbit if you stared at it long enough.

I sighed and raised the brush, now covered with black paint, and obliterated the image with three big swipes.

If there was one thing I had learned in my short life, it's that you could never go back. The future was the only thing that was susceptible to change, in my opinion.

And I was about to test that theory.

"So…" I began once I hopped into Bella's truck after school. Edward and Alice took off earlier, I managed to avoid a lecture from big brother, but he made me promise a thousand times to call him when we got there and when I was on my way home. He needed to learn to lighten up if you asked me. "Do you mind if I stop off in downtown Forks for some stuff before we go to La Push?" I asked in my sweetest voice.

Bella hesitated. "I don't know, I was supposed to meet Edward after we leave La Push…"

I crossed my arms and sat back with a huff. "To get a report on my behavior over the boarder?" I accused. "You all need to learn that I can take care of myself."

To my surprise, she blushed to the roots of her hair. "No, we're just supposed to talk."

"About?" I pressed.

"About- about our baby." She stuttered.

"Ahhhh…." I said, wiggling my eyebrows. "That'll be a fun conversation."

"I've seen Alice's powers at work, but just still can't believe it." She said, fiddling with the radio as we made our way to downtown Forks. "I didn't think Edward and I would ever… you know… while I was still human, at least."

I swallowed vomit. Ew. Just ew. "Yeah... I'm not sure I'm the best person to have this conversation with." I said nervously. I so did not want to talk about this. "I mean, I'm competition for your daughter after all."

She sighed. "Sorry. I didn't mean to get too personal."

"It's cool." I said, looking intently out of the window.

"It's just," She continued, oblivious to my discomfort. "Me? A mom? I never imagined I would have kids of my own. Especially after I met Edward. I didn't think it was an option. And then the whole imprinting thing has me all confused. Does that mean Renesmee's future with Jake is gone? If I decide to have her, I mean. Not that I think it's a bad thing, the idea of my best friend imprinting on my baby is just creepy, even if he only feels brotherly love for her in the beginning."

"Are you considering letting the opportunity pass?" I was surprised. "You have a lot of time to think it over."

"Yeah." she said glumly. "I didn't plan on remaining human for that much longer. I figured I'd wear Edward down eventually and he'd turn me, but now… I just don't know."

"You should wait." I said, pointing out an open parking space in front of the coffee shop. "It can't hurt. Your future is bright either way. I understand Edward was supposed to leave you after your birthday fiasco, but that changed. He's still here."

"I never properly thanked you for that, by the way." Bella said, turning to me once she put the truck in park. "I don't know what I would have done if he had left me. I probably would have been a zombie or something."

"Maybe." I said, embarrassed by the emotion in her voice. She really loved the guy. "Or maybe you would have found an inner strength to carry on and become a stronger woman because of it." I almost laughed. We both knew she would fall apart into a million pieces if Edward ever left her.

"Yeah, maybe." She said, not sounding confident in her answer at all. "So what do you need down here anyway?"

Now for the lying. "I was reading about water elementals online and I saw some stuff about increasing your power through crystals and natural energies via gems and herbs and stuff. There's a store down here called Featherheads and they have the kind of stuff I'm looking for. Thought I'd see if it was real or not."

Bella looked skeptical. "Okay, but you can't trust everything you read online."

I chuckled. "I know. Anyway, you want to grab a coffee while I go in? It might take a few minutes."

She nodded. "Sure. Can I get you anything?"

"Yes please!" My body was begging for caffeine. "I'll take a hazelnut latte with a double shot of espresso."

"Coming right up. Meet back here in twenty?"

I nodded, hoping that was enough time. "Sure thing." We split ways and as soon as Bella ducked into the cafe I pulled out my cell phone and dialed the number I was smart enough to memorize years ago. Three rings later a woman picked up.

"Lady Morgana's Magical Menagerie. How can I be of service?" A woman said in a British accent.

"Lydia, it's me." I said with a bright smile. If anyone actually believed she was really from England, I'd eat my shoe.

The Brit facade crumbled and an American woman took her place. "Ivy? Hey! It's been awhile. Getting into much trouble lately?"

"If being imprinted on by a werewolf doesn't constitute as trouble, then no. Things have been perfectly dull."

I pulled the phone away from my ear just in time to avoid losing my hearing from her piercing yell. "WHAT?!"

"Yeah. Listen, I don't have a lot of time." I said quickly. "I need a powerful spell to make him stop loving me."

"Not possible." She said at once in a firm voice. "You know how I feel about tampering with natural magic. It's unpredictable."

"Come on, Lydia! Please?"

"Absolutely not." She insisted.

I grit my teeth. I really didn't want to pull this card, but she gave me no choice. "Lydia, have you forgotten that I am the one who avenged your son's murder?"

I heard her sharp intake of breath, the painful memories still too fresh. "I will never forget that, Ivy. You know how grateful I am for what you did."

"I nearly died." I reminded her. "But I tracked that vampire down and I made her suffer before the end, just like you asked. I need your help now. Please, Lydia. This guy belongs with someone else. Not me. You're the most powerful witch I know. If anyone can make him stop loving me, you can."

There as a long pause. "Ivy, you don't know what you're asking. Imprinting is ancient. Playing with magics like that, it's dangerous."

"I understand, but you don't have all the facts. I was chosen by mistake."

"Imprint magic doesn't make mistakes. If you're his soul-mate, then you're his soul-mate. There are no loop-holes or alternatives."

I squeezed my eyes shut and forced my voice to sound calm. "Are you going to help me or not?" I paced outside Featherheads. The windows were full of signs for yoga classes and mystic healing sessions half-off. There were dream catchers dangling on every inch of visible ceiling. Candles, feathers, crystals, hematite jewelry; you name it, a hippie wanted it and it was here.

Lydia let out a heavy sigh. "I don't agree with this at all, Ivy, but for the sake of our past, I'll help you."

"Thank you!" I relaxed. "I'm at a store for supplies, tell me what I need."

"Hang on. Let me consult the grimoire…"

Fifteen minutes later I was walking back to the coffee house. In my possession was a package of crushed malachite (for transformation) and morganite (to heal a broken heart and keep it open for new love) as well as some powdered root I couldn't pronounce the name of if I tried. Dusty, the shop owner, took ages to scrounge it up from the back room and let me tell you, the freaks don't just come out at night. They're making daytime visits now.

Of course all of these items were unless without Lydia. She was a powerful witch who I met by chance after her six year old son was murdered under suspicious circumstances. I was in the area and she sensed my powers from a mile away. I'd never met a grief-stricken mother before. It was awful. When she asked for my help, I couldn't say no. She could have burned the vampire herself, but according to her, that would be too quick a death.

Lydia said the vampiress that killed her son had a gift of sensing human energy and used magic to put a block on my mind (that's why Edward couldn't read my thoughts) and I tracked her down. Unfortunately, she smelled me coming and nearly took me out. I was bleeding and down, but not out. It was just my luck that the cabin she'd been staying at was next to a lake. I made sure she could feel it when I ripped her apart piece by piece. Sometimes I can hear her screaming in my head when I try to sleep. I shivered and pushed the memories away and made my way back to the rendezvous point.

"Hey." Bella greeted, nearly bumping into me when she left the coffee shop, two cups in hand. "One double-shot hazelnut latte."

"Thanks. You're a lifesaver." I said, cooling both of our drinks from lava hot to just-right-steamy. I took a swig once we were rolling down the road to La Push and my eyes slid shut in pure bliss. Coffee was life.

"So, did you find the crystals you needed?" Bella said, trying to strike a conversation.

"Yep. But you're right. This stuff is probably just hokum."

She laughed and we talked the rest of the way about how weird Dusty is. Soon, we were crossing into La Push and making our way to the beach. I got out of the truck and fished the keys out of the wheel-well of the Cullen's car, my usual hiding spot. Yes! They were still here. I pulled out the keyring and turned to Bella who was waiting patiently for me. "Bells?" I said, using all my charm to look shy and giddy.

"Yeah?" She said, leaning out of her window.

"Now that I'm here, I was wondering if you could tell me where Jake's house is? I really want to talk to him…" I trailed off and bit my lip. I didn't have to fake looking nervous, I felt really nervous. I was about to do something big. Really big. I had second thoughts, sure, but I told myself that I needed to do this. It was better for everyone this way. Especially Jake.

She frowned. "Ivy, I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Please?" I said, allowing a hint of begging to creep into my tone. "I have to see him, Bella. You don't know what this is like. It's torture to be so unsure of our future. I'm only going to talk to him. No fighting, I swear. I'll come home right after."

Bella bit her lip. "Alright. If you promise not to fight."

I made an x over my chest. "Cross my heart, hope to die."

She still looked apprehensive, but she gave me directions anyway. "Thanks, Bella. Edward will understand. I have to straighten some things out. I'll be thirty minutes behind you—an hour tops."

"You'd better." She said, trying to look stern.

I waved as she drove away and got in my car, immediately pulling out my cell phone. "Lydia. I have everything. Now what?"

"Do you have a bowl?" I glanced around. Dang it! No bowl. "Um. I have a paper coffee cup."

I could almost see her pinching the bridge of her nose. "I suppose that will have to do." She muttered. "Now, place the crushed crystals in the cup first and mix them together."

"Got it." I guzzled the last of my coffee and poured in the malachite and morganite and shook the cup until the green and pink powder mixed together. "Done. Now what?"

"I have some words to say. Hold the speaker close to the crystals." I did as I was told and the ancient language flowed from Lydia's mouth, each word laced with power making my head feel fuzzy. As she spoke, the crystals in the cup began to glow a dull red. "Did it glow?" She asked.

"Yep."

"Okay." She continued. I could hear the rustling of paper as she sifted through her spell book. "Now pluck a strand of your hair and add that, then pour the root powder on top. In that order." She added sternly.

"Yes, ma'am." I tossed in a strand of blonde hair then added the powder. Lydia began chanting again and the mixture began to glow once more, only this time it changed into a dark, muddy brown. It was hardly a pretty color, but I wasn't going to judge.

"Done." Lydia said, panting lightly. "Wow. That took a lot out of me. No more long distance spells. Next time you need a favor, you can drive your ass down to South Carolina and meet me in person."

"Deal." I said, happy I still had the option to call in favors with her. "What do I do next?"

"Take a pinch—and when I say pinch, I mean pinch—and blow it in his face and say, 'Finis.' That should block his feelings for you, but leave his heart open for future love."

"Perfect." I said, placing the lid carefully on the cup.

"Ivy, are you really one-hundred-percent sure you want to go through with this? It could hurt you. Or him."

"He'll be fine. There's someone else on the horizon for him. It can't be me." But there was an ache in my stomach as I said this. I was suddenly second guessing myself.

"Well, if you're sure…" Lydia said. "Goodbye, Ivy Adair. I hope you won't regret this." She hung up without waiting for a reply.

"Me too," I admitted, putting my cell phone away.

I was almost surprised when the car started on the first try, it had been sitting idle for so long. But the engine purred like a kitten and I found myself following Bella's directions to the Black household. It was nestled in the woods a few yards off of a quiet road. There was a garage off to the side and a mossy trees here and there. Overall, it was very quaint. I parked and trudged through the rain to the front door with my cup full of magic, my hands started shaking when I reached the porch. I knocked on the door twice and wiped my sweaty palms on my jeans.

Pull it together, Ivy. I told myself. Five more minutes and this mess will all be cleared up. The door swung open and I forgot how mad I was at Jacob when I saw the bewildered, but excited smile light his entire face when he saw me standing there. Lord, did I want to kiss him in that moment. "Ivy, I'm so glad to see you!" He said, practically thrumming with happiness.

I shook myself. Hard. I had to remember that he wasn't mine to kiss. "Hey, Jake. You home alone?"

Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes.

"Yeah, dad's out with Harry." He said, like I knew who Harry was. I didn't.

"Great." I said, trying to mask my nervousness. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah, come in out of the rain." He stepped back and I walked through into a space I could tell only housed men. The lack of decor and mismatched furniture was a dead give-away. Despite the bachelor look, it had a cozy feel. Under any other circumstance, I probably would have collapsed into the overstuffed couch for a power-nap. But now was definitely not the time.

"Ivy, I'm glad you came over. I was going to swing by the Cullen's later today to talk to you."

That caught me off-guard. "You were? Why?"

"You're important to me and I hurt you and insulted the people you care about. I know how much that upset you and I couldn't stand it anymore." He said seriously.

I didn't know what to say. He looked so sincere, my heart melted a little bit. I glanced to the left to break his intense stare and my eyes landed on a picture of him and Bella laughing at a picnic with their dads. I gulped and my resolve solidified. He wasn't really mine, it was all a big mistake. This was for the best. "I'm sorry, Jake, but this is for your own good." I popped off the lid of the coffee cup with my thumb and reached in quickly with my other hand to grab a pinch of the powder inside.

"What are you doing? What's in there?" He asked sniffing the air, but I ignored him and blew the dust in his face. He jerked back, choking.

"Finis." I said in a clear voice. There was a spark of yellow, like the powder was flammable, but instead of catching fire it sort of absorbed into Jake's skin.

"What the hell did you just do?" He demanded. Brown eyes flashing with anger. His hands swiped over his face and shirt, but there was no brown dust to get rid of. It was all inside him.

I sighed, partly with relief and, believe it or not, partly with disappointment. The fury in his voice told me the spell worked. He wouldn't have talked to me like that before. "It's all okay now. I used magic to erase your love for me."

"What?!" He yelled. He lunged forward and grabbed my arms in his strong grip. I winced. "Why did you do that? I didn't ask you to- to—."

His expression contorted and he suddenly dropped to the floor with a cry of pain. "Jacob? Are you alright?" I fell to my knees next to him, my heart stopping.

He cringed into a ball and started wheezing. "Can't! Breathe!" His eyes were panicked and foggy with pain. "Too. Much. Pain." He sucked in a ragged breath, his face going blue. "I can't feel anything but pain." He whispered, panic in his voice.

Oh God, what have I done? Terror jumpstarted my heart. "Jake! Hang on. I'm going to fix this!" I patted his cheek, looking around like someone would just appear out of thin air to help me.

I scrambled for my phone and dialed Lydia's number. "Lydia!" I screamed before she got done with her whole 'Mystical Menagerie' bit. "How do I break the spell? It's killing him!"

"I told you!" She screamed back, tone going from bored to alarmed in seconds. "This in on you, Ivy! I warned you that tampering—"

"Now isn't the time! Jake is barely breathing!" I touched the side of his neck and was horrified to feel his pulse go noticeably slow under my hand an his temperature drop several degrees. "How do I reverse it?"

Pages fluttered frantically on the other end, "The spell book is very specific. A single kiss from a soulmate and the bond is restored. Permanently."

"The hell?" I pulled the phone away from my ear and stared at it for a moment. "What is this, Lydia? Snow White?!"

"I don't make the rules!" She snapped, "I just follow them. A kiss from you will break the spell." The line went clear. The witch hung up on me!

"Ughhh, fine!" I screamed. Jacob was curled into a ball, his skin was freezing cold and covered in a sheen of sweat. "I'm so sorry, Jake. I didn't know this would happen."

He moaned. "Get away from me! Every time you touch me it gets worse." He wrapped his hands over his head in a protective gesture. I felt acute guilt cut me to the bone. Why couldn't I just listen for once? I thought Lydia was talking about emotional pain, not physical. Not that that makes my actions any less awful.

"No can do, Prince Charming." I said, wiping his brow with my sleeve. "There's something I have to do first." Before he could push me away, I pulled his arms away from his face, leaned down, and pressed my lips firmly against his.

The change was instantaneous. Heat flooded his skin and the shivering stopped. I could feel his heartbeat course through his veins like a sledgehammer on my fingertips where they rested on his chest. I pulled back and his eyes snapped open in shock and his pupils dilated when they met mine. He took a deep breath, filling his lungs to capacity. And then he was on me.

His hard body slammed into me like bullet train, toppling me backwards onto the hardwood floor. His lips took mine with a furious passion that robbed me of breath. Of their own accord, my hands circled those tantalizing biceps and pulled him even closer. His hands tangled in my hair as his lips parted and his tongue melted against mine. Heat roared in my veins as we kissed with a lust I didn't know I possessed. But just as fast as the kiss started, it ended. Jake was practically everywhere, and then he was just gone.

I lay gasping on the floor, shivering without his warmth, staring at the popcorn ceiling for several seconds before I could form a coherent thought. I stood up slowly and saw Jake standing half-way across the room, leaning against the kitchen counter, breathing just as hard as me. His shoulders expanded, tugging his white shirt tightly across his broad frame, giving me a great view of those taunt shoulder and back muscles. I wanted him to be kissing me again, but when he turned back to me, finally in control of himself, there was so much anger in his eyes, I took an involuntary step back.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" He barked. My eyes widened. The bond was restored, right? I thought he couldn't get mad at me. "Oh, I can get mad at you alright." He said, reading my expression perfectly. "I'm surprised at just how mad I can get."

"Jacob," I said, my mouth going dry. "I'm sorry, I was just trying to make things right."

"How could blocking my love for you make anything right?" He exploded, advancing on me quickly; I got the distinct impression of an alpha predator stalking down its prey. I wanted to place a water wall between us (which would be easy enough since I could feel the leaky tap in the bathroom just down the hall) but I knew I deserved this.

"There's this other girl. You're supposed to imprint on her instead of me, but I showed up and changed your future and now she probably won't be born you'll never be together because of me and everything is mess—"

He held up his hand and cut me off. "I don't care about this other woman you think I'm supposed to fall in love with. I can't love anyone other than you. It's impossible. But you tried to break our bond anyway. You used magic on me without my permission and it almost killed me!" I stared at the floor in shame. "I might not know you well, but I can't believe you'd be that selfish. I'm not a slave to your will or incapable of making my own decisions because I imprinted on you. I loved you in the blink of an eye, yes, but that doesn't make me half a person. You couldn't understand because the bond doesn't go both ways, but I am whole because of you. Loving you is the best thing about me and you tried to take that away. How could you. Ivy?"

I flinched at the hurt in his tone. "I'm sorry, Jacob. I didn't mean to hurt you."

He shook his head, furious heat pouring off of him in waves. "I'm still so angry with you, I can't think straight. I'm going to need some time."

I nodded, tears gathering in my eyes. I blew it. Jake really did had a will of his own and now he was using it to send me away. Lydia warned me but I thought I knew better. It hurt so much because it wasn't the first time I'd been abandoned by a man who was important to me. But this time I had actually done something wrong.

"I understand." I spun on my heel so he wouldn't see the tears in my eyes and fled the house like the hounds of hell were at my heels.

Only when I was a mile down the road did I let those tears fall.

And there you have it.

The next chapter will be up sometime tomorrow. I'm working on it now. Promise!

TTFN!