Related episode: 3.16 Elephant's Memory

Stravinsky's Rite of Spring-a ballet and orchestral concert work by the Russian composer; the avant-garde nature of the music and choreography caused a near-riot in the audience

There were flashcards spread out on my bed, a stack of text books piled on my nightstand, highlighters and pencils lost in the folds of my bedspread, and Hannah growling from her spot on the floor.

SAT prep with finals a month and a half after that. Clearly, someone hated high school students when this was planned. And as most of my teachers, Reid, and Hotch were prone to remind me, this was the year grades really counted. As if that wasn't bad enough, I had also still tried out for pit band for Into the Woods and made it which added rehearsals on top of my school load along with keeping most of my hours at Monarch Books.

Surrounded by profilers, and none of them have diagnosed me as clinically insane yet. Maybe it was too much paperwork.

It spoke of how focused I was that I didn't even notice Hotch moving around the apartment until he was standing in my door frame, concern plainly written on his face.

"How long have you been at this?" he asked.

I glanced at my watch, blinked a few times, and realized just how late it had gotten.

"For the love of…" I muttered under my breath. "Um, almost four hours."

"And it's past midnight," Hotch pointed out. "Call it a night."

I reached for my physics notes anyway. "Half an hour."

"Rachel."

I froze as I was, looking up into a stern gaze that could make hardened and psychotic criminals quake in fear.

"I'll just pack everything up then."

Hotch stayed to watch as I gathered up the flashcards and put a rubber band around them and organized my backpack for the next morning. In the past few months, Hotch has been acting more and more like a parent toward me, not just a guardian. I actually didn't mind. He never acted exactly like a father, or especially like my father, but it was more in the way we were growing more comfortable with each other that he was willing to step in and help me (even save me from myself) and that I was willing to accept it.

"What are you still doing up?" I asked, stacking the texts and notebooks I wouldn't need tomorrow in their places on my bookshelves.

"Forms from our last case," Hotch answered, frowning slightly.

"The kid my age who decided to shoot all the villains in his life, right?"

"Yes."

Hotch had only just gotten back from Texas this afternoon and I had realized right away that something was still bothering him. There was something in the tightness of his eyes that gave him away, just as the minute drooping of my father's shoulders had been his tell for a tough case.

"Did something happen?" I asked quietly.

Hotch sighed and I knew he was weighing his usual tendency to hold back against my question. That he was hesitating at all meant that whatever had happened was probably horrific and personal at the same time. If it were only gory, Hotch would say so and leave it at that. If it were just personal, he would also just say so and tell me good night.

"Reid disobeyed orders today and risked his life to bring in our suspect alive when the local sheriff's office was ready to shoot," Hotch finally said.

One part of my brain processed that Hotch only told me this because of how much I cared about him. The rest of me wondered which part had freaked Hotch out worse: Reid disobeying or risking his life. Probably both.

"Why would he do that?" I asked. Maybe I would have believed it more easily if Reid had acted to save the life of a victim, but not the suspect.

"This case was very close to Reid," Hotch explained tersely.

I was walking a thin line of Hotch's patience and considering the time of night, I just nodded and said good night. Not that I was going to just leave it at that. Sure, I was okay with not knowing everything about the team's cases, but when it was personal for one of them, I wanted to know about it. I don't know if I always wanted to know so that I would be prepared for it to come up or so that I could think of ways to help if I could.

Reid kept odd hours himself, so when I sent him a text asking to meet for lunch the next day, I got an affirmative response right away. Then I crawled under my covers and breathed deeply to try and calm my twirling thoughts.

The next morning, I had it worked out that Hotch would drive me to school for pit band rehearsal in the morning on his way to pick up Jack for a few hours and Reid would pick me up, take me to the Crown Café for coffee and then I could work a bit at Monarch. After that, I could go to Reid's apartment to study with him for the SAT's, we'd have dinner, and then watch Doctor Who. Sounded like the perfect Saturday to me.

And yeah, I would also have time to figure out what was going on with Reid. I would never claim to have perfect motives.

I dressed for the day in black leggings and a short magenta dress with black ballet flats. It would be comfortable enough for sitting for a long rehearsal and still nice enough that I could wear it to work. The parking lot was packed with cars when Hotch dropped me off (my valid excuse for asking for a ride when I had my own car) as we were on the cusp of hell week with almost all hands on deck. The only people missing at this point from rehearsals were the make up and hair people.

Today was all about the ensemble scenes, including the prologues, finales, and songs like "Ever After" and "It's the Last Midnight." I was missing Liz in the pit band, but she had decided to audition for a role this year so she was currently singing her heart out as Rapunzel on stage. Unfortunately, that left me with Alicia, Mark, and Jenny Thiele in the pit with me and no one to talk with. Thank God most of my detractors thought that ignoring me was a clever trick. I was grateful.

"We're still dragging the tempo for 'Ever After' so I want everyone to run through that piece specifically before Monday's rehearsal," Mr. Rose told us at the end of our morning. "Other than that, you all know your problem areas."

I packed up my flute and music and headed for the door, already plotting on how to bring up the last case with Reid. If the parking lot had been packed earlier that morning, it was worse now with everyone wanting to get out of here. Add to that all the students getting out of morning practices for the spring sport teams and it felt as if the whole student population was present.

Finally I saw Reid standing next to his gigantic oldie, waving one long arm to get my attention. I smiled and waved back, about to brave the crossings, when I heard familiar voices and familiar names.

"That's an FBI agent? You're kidding." It was Jenny Thiele.

"Rachel's dad recruited him a few years ago," I heard Alicia explain. "He's some super genius or something."

"He'd have to be," someone else laughed. "He looks like my little sister could beat him up."

If it had been any other day, I could have walked away. If it had been a few years ago, I might have smiled and let it go just because Reid was such an unlikely looking federal agent.

But after everything that had happened to me, and to him, and even just the stuff that I knew about, no way.

I turned on my heel and stalked back to the group of girls, reveling just a little bit in the way they all flinched when they realized I had heard them. But they had comfort in numbers and popularity, so the disdainful facades flipped onto their faces, though Alicia's still looked slightly concerned.

"Sorry, I couldn't help but overhear your opinions on that federal agent," I commented, not sounding sorry at all.

"You mean the beanpole over there?" Jenny clarified. "Yeah. I thought FBI guys were supposed to be tough."

"You want to know what's better than being tough?" I asked rhetorically. "Being smart, which is what that guy is. His name is Doctor Spencer Reid, a supervisory special agent in the FBI on the Behavioral Analysis Unit. There's less than a hundred of agents who make it to that level. He graduated from high school when he was twelve and he had three doctorate degrees before he was twenty one years old."

Alicia and the others started to look a little impressed and chagrined, but Jenny would rather eat carbs all day than let me gain the upper hand.

"It's hard to imagine him taking down an armed suspect," she remarked snidely. "Does he lecture them to submission? Arrest by boredom?"

"Not exactly," I replied. "But he outsmarts them all the time. Once, he was even taken hostage, had no weapon of his own, but at the end of the day, he was the one who walked out after the suspect had been shot, by him."

"Okay, so he's smart, fine," Alicia broke in, obviously trying to diffuse the situation. She at least knew me well enough that I wasn't going to go easy on them about this. And she knew at least a little bit about the ammunition I could draw on to make my point.

"He's a genius," I snapped. "And he's also one of the bravest men I know. However smart he is? He's just as strong. He's helped stop terrorists, rescued a woman from her stalker, and faces off against rapists and serial killers all the time. One time, he was abducted by a psychopath with split personalities who tied him up, beat him for two days, and played Russian roulette with a pistol in his face and he didn't break."

Each of the girls was staring at me with wide eyes and I realized that we had an even larger audience as other kids had stopped to eavesdrop.

"And you know the best part?" I laughed. "He does all of this despite the fact that people like you constantly dismiss and ridicule him to his face and behind his back. And he would still do his best to help you if you needed it. Because he's bigger than petty teasing and judgmental, small-minded opinions like yours."

For once, Jenny's face was devoid of its usual pretty and sly little smile. Alicia looked ashamed and the others couldn't meet my eyes.

"So try to show a little respect, okay?"

I left before I could keep going, which I still could. There was tons that I wanted to add, like how Reid had been the one to go to Dad's cabin alone. Or I could have shared some of the gory details that I knew about the team's cases which were enough to make me squirm and would have sickened everybody present and sent them screaming for the hills.

But instead I walked away. I hadn't made it more than ten yards away when I realized that Reid was suddenly standing right there on the sidewalk, his expression inscrutable.

I gulped. "You heard all of that, didn't you?"

"I think I missed the beginning," he commented neutrally. "I came in when you brought up Phillip Dowd's case."

I hadn't remembered the name, but of course Reid would remember the first man he had killed, even without the eidetic memory.

"Let's get going," Reid suggested. "Tables fill up fast at the café on Saturdays for lunch."

I followed in his wake, worrying that I had offended him or stepped out of bounds sharing all of that information with a bunch of silly teenaged girls who didn't know any better. The longer we went without speaking, the more I regretted it just for his sake. It was very personal information that he probably didn't want everyone to know. Reid seemed deep in thought as we drove into town, so I remained silent. In my thoughts, I realized that I had never seen Reid act this way toward me before in my life. There was something bone-chillingly disturbing with getting the silent treatment from Reid, more than from anyone else in my life.

"I'm sorry," I said quietly after we had snagged a corner booth inside the Crown Café. "I know I shouldn't have let them bother me like they did and I know I shouldn't have told them all those things about you."

Reid glanced up from the menu (why he needed to look when it was already imprinted in his memory I don't know) and raised his eyebrows in surprise. "What?"

"I'm sorry," I repeated. "I was just sinking to their level."

"Rachel," Reid said slowly. "No one has ever stood up for me like that before. No one."

My mouth dropped open, I'm sure of it. "Then why haven't you said anything since we left school? I thought you were angry."

He frowned. "Not angry. I'm surprised and just a little in awe right now. You were brilliant."

And now I was blushing. I hid my face by looking at my own menu even though I knew I would be ordering my favorite asparagus and mushroom quiche. I looked up when Reid reached out and grabbed my hand.

"Thank you, Rachel," he told me steadily. "Thank you for defending me and for appreciating who I am and what I do. What the whole team does."

"I owe you so much," I confessed in a whisper. "And no one is as spectacular as you are and as under-appreciated."

Before either of us could get any mushier, our waitress came by for our drink orders. It was Natasha today, daughter of my boss Colin at Monarch Books and granddaughter of Matilda Morris who ran the cafe. She was four years older than I was and attending culinary school to follow in the family business.

"Don't tell me," Natasha said. "One iced green tea with lemon and sweetener, one tall coffee heavy on the cream and sugar."

I was much a regular as Reid, so our typical orders were common knowledge, even to knowing that I preferred mochas in the mornings and tea in the afternoons.

"Just for that, I want a lemonade," I corrected her with a smile.

Natasha smirked. She was no more than an inch or two taller than I was with purple and blue streaks in her blond hair. "Changing it up for lunch, too?"

"Absolutely not. That quiche is a sacrament."

"And for you, Doctor Reid?"

"Chicken salad on the croissant, please, Natasha."

"Coming at you."

"So what else is on your mind?" Reid asked after Natasha had left.

I actually did consider deflecting his query, but then I thought, what's the point?

"Hotch mentioned the last case was hard for you," I admitted. "But he was tight-lipped on the details."

Reid sighed. He didn't answer me until after Natasha had dropped off our drinks.

"You know that our suspect was a teenaged boy, right?" he asked me. I nodded. "And he was targeting the people in his life that had wronged him or the girl he cared about, like classmates that had been cruel and both of their fathers who had been abusive in one way or another."

"Are you saying that you think he was justified?" I asked carefully thinking about my own group of classmates that I really didn't like.

"No," he answered quickly. "But I understand why he did it. He was smart but not on tests so most people thought he was slower than he actually was. And he was always teased."

I suddenly understood exactly why Reid had risked his life to save the boy even after all he had done.

"He was like you," I said.

Reid snorted. "Close enough that I felt more on his side than the police."

"And that's why Hotch got upset with you," I realized. "You got in the way of the police bringing the kid down."

Reid's eyes were sharp on my face, likely reading all the micro-expressions on my face but having to sit on his observations while Natasha came with our food.

"You are picking up profiling skills so quickly it's a little scary," Reid admitted.

"Spencer, if I wasn't learning how to profile after listening to you and Dad and Hotch after all this time, you would be worried about my intelligence."

"True."

We lightened up the rest of our conversation as Reid asked for my performance dates and I talked about what I wanted to cover in our study session later in the day. When we had finished eating, Reid handed me money to take up to the counter, but I insisted on using my discount card instead of his.

"Gran wants to know if you were headed next door if you might bring some drinks and snacks to Dad and the others," Natasha asked as she rang our order up.

"Yeah, sure," I agreed.

Natasha smirked. "There's a green tea for you, too."

I smirked back. "Thank you," I said sweetly. "Oh, and Spencer is likely to keep our booth and do some reading while I'm working." I added a few bills of my own on the pile. "Keep him caffeinated for me please?"

"My pleasure," Natasha promised, looking over at the man in question before looking back at me. "Lucky you to be so close to him. He's just ridiculously hot, in a geeky way."

"Spencer? Hot?" I asked.

Natasha winked at me. "Get on my side of twenty and a sexy geek becomes much more desirable."

I shook my head. I loved Reid, I did, and while I knew exactly how amazing he was, I could not think of him that way.

"He's practically my brother," I protested. "Just, keep those thoughts to yourself."

"I'm not alone in thinking that way!" Natasha called after me as I made my escape.

Reid had his mouth open to ask me what was going on, but I cut him off before a single word made it out. "You don't want to know, trust me."

Thankfully, I was spared the torture of telling Reid that he was Natasha's eye candy.

I went to work at the bookstore, working on entering new inventory into the computer, picking up the toys and books in the kid's corner, and eventually climbing the ladder to dust the top shelves and the books resting there.

"Try not to fall down, honey," Colin warned me. "I don't want FBI agents busting my tail for your clumsiness."

Colin had known Reid for years and Hotch had made it a point to stop in and meet Colin when I had been hired on permanently. The entire work place knew about my connections.

With my boss still watching me, I reached backwards to re-shelve a book, wobbling on purpose before righting myself.

"Oops," I said unrepentantly.

"Rachel, it would be impossible to overbalance on that ladder to knock down all the bookshelves in the store like dominos."

Both Colin and I looked over and saw that Reid had come into the store. I glanced at my watch and saw that it was nearly time to leave.

"It looked like fun in The Mummy," I explained.

I burst out laughing when Colin started muttering about curses under his breath just like the curator had in the film.

"But that ladder only had two points in contact with the ground," Reid explained, still intent on his lecture about structure and gravity. As he proceeded to explain how the bookstore ladder was designed for stability, he walked up and offered me a hand down. I took it and hopped down the last few steps, just to tease.

We said good-bye to Colin, who pretended to look relieved that I was leaving.

"Thanks for introducing me," I told Reid as we walked to his car. "I can't imagine working anywhere else."

We picked up Chinese on our way to Reid's apartment and ate an early dinner before working on my SATs for a couple hours. By the time I was starting to wilt, Doctor Who was on. Curled up on the couch and watching the Doctor and Shakespeare save the world, I couldn't help but think: cool as the Doctor is, I had my own Doctor who was even better.

Notes:

Personally, I remember being horrified with the story of Reid's childhood shared in this episode. It's one of the biggest reasons that I detest bullies in addition to my own experiences which seem minimal compared to this and others. And that's why I had to have Rachel verbally decimate the group of girls. It was too fun to resist and I hope everyone enjoyed her "protective sister" tirade.

Anyone who has seen Fantasia knows "The Rite of Spring" because it's the song used for the animation of the universe being created and into the dinosaur segment. There's also a funny story about the bassoonist who solo-ed the opening, but I'll let people PM me if they want that. That bit up there about the near-riot at its premier? Stravinsky composed very startling music for his time and what happened was that some of the audience was genuinely intrigued and some were appalled. The shocked-and-appalled crowd started talking and griping, then they were shushed by the rest and well, music lovers are very passionate people, leading to some altercations. Talk about a performance for the books. Personally? I am much more fond of Stravinsky's "Firebird Suite" myself. And that would make a good chapter title too, later on...

But I chose it for this chapter to echo some of the mob-like mentality that struck the sheriff's office and some of the teachers when they all turned on Owen Savage. I also thought that Reid's interference in Owen's arrest played into that theme, as well as the split of motivations between the locals and the BAU. Then I added Rachel's soap box moment and it just fit into all of that.

Thank you to all of you who read and enjoy this work of mine. It is certainly the most dedicated I've ever been to writing and a character. As we come up to the end of Mvt III, I want to assure you that I will be starting work on Mvt IV soon. I hope to start posting that in early June in a similar fashion as I've now established of uploading four-five chapters in a row in between breaks when I write frantically to get more written. The last two chapters are a two-parter for Lo-fi/Mayhem, the first of which will be posted a week from today.

Thank you all again (and thanks for the reviews) and I hope everyone had a lovely Valentine's Day or Single's Awareness Day, whichever is applicable.

Cantoris