I didn't tell Klaus about the package. To be honest, I didn't think about it again for several hours, and by then he'd already left.
We went to dinner at a local restaurant. It was your run of the mill steakhouse. I liked how he didn't assume I would want a salad. Nothing wrong with salad, but come on, that's not why someone goes to a steakhouse. We ate and chatted. Klaus reached in his jacket and brought out a packet for me to look it. It was a list of foundations he'd contacted on my behalf and their list of approved universities. If I went to a school not on the list, they would fund a portion of my education, but if I attended somewhere they'd recommended they would give me a full ride. Seemed a little exclusionary to me, but who knew—maybe I would want to go to one of those schools anyway. I decided to look, make decision, then double check it against the list. I didn't want to be biased.
I tried to steal glances at Klaus when he wasn't looking. I didn't have a lot of opportunity to watch him unobserved, you know? I liked the way he held his fork and knife. It was kind of delicate, to be honest. Like this was a ceremony. Maybe for him it was.
He caught me watching him. "What?"
"Nothing. Just looking." I got back to eating. "Thanks for the list, Klaus. It means a lot to me. Any idea if the schools are in my area?"
"Perhaps one or two. Does it matter?"
I paused. "What do you mean?"
"If you found a university out of state, would it truly be so terrible?"
"I don't know about terrible, but I like this city. I want to stick around for a few years."
He chewed slowly. "Would the ginger haired roommate have anything to do with this decision?" His lashes had lowered, as if he were carefully choosing his words.
O-kay. "Maybe,"I allowed. "He's my friend. Maybe my best friend outside of Mystic Falls. I want to keep an eye on him." I shrugged one shoulder. This was a tricky subject, and I could feel the both of us picking through the minefield.
I rubbed my thumb against the hilt of my knife, wondering what he'd say.
"What makes him so special to you, Caroline?"
I laughed a little. "Colby? Well, who else is going to watch movies with me and eat ice cream? He's..." I tried to find the words. "He listens to me, and we talk about boys."
His brow furrowed. "Boys?"
Oh yeah. "Colby's bi. He doesn't have a family anymore because his parents tossed him out when he told them. His sister's name is on the lease, but that's the last thing she did for him. I guess she wasn't too comfortable with it either. I know he's got other friends, but sometimes I think we're more family than that. We were two people alone. Now we're not. That's Colby."
I couldn't read the expression on Klaus' face. It wasn't smooth but it wasn't angry either. Don't grab the lion by the tail, I told myself. I shifted in my seat, and then against my better judgment, "Are you worried?"
"Worried?" he repeated, the same way he might have said 'manure?'. "Have you ever known me to be worried, Caroline?"
I made a face. "I was giving you an out, but if you want to play it like that, no I haven't seen you worried. I've seen you jealous, though. I think it's a pretty safe bet that that's exactly what you are this time." I raised both brows, just daring him to deny it.
His jaw tightened. "I find it...difficult when you exhibit affection towards someone." Someone other than me. He didn't say it. He didn't have to.
I put my silverwear down and leaned my elbows on the table. "Don't push too hard, Klaus. Let's just take this one step at a time. We've made promises to each other and we're going to keep them. The rest will come."
His face shuttered. "One can hope."
"Don't be like that."
He turned up his nose aristocratically. "How do you mean?"
I wasn't fooled for a second. "Don't put on the mask. It means you're protecting yourself 'cause you think I'm going to hurt your feelings. You try to be aloof to show that I can't. I like the real Klaus better."
"The real Klaus, as you put it," he said slowly, "is far to vulnerable for my liking."
My lips twitched. "Join the club."
He zeroed in on me. "Are you? Vulnerable?"
"What kind of question is that?"
"I know you can be fearful. Vulnerable, on the other hand, indicates a helplessness I find that I cannot detect in you. There are times, my love, when I would swear that you could recover from anything a'tall."
"Well, that's because you're associating vulnerability with weakness. Really it just means someone can see a part of you that you wouldn't dare show anybody else."
His interest was fully engaged. He watched me intently, like every word I said was a glimpse into a mysterious new world he wanted to navigate. "Such as."
"Are you serious? You really don't know?"
He said nothing.
I could not believe that I was going to just flat out say it, but there was nothing doing. I had to hold my nose and jump in. "Klaus. Did I or did I not freak out in the museum?"
He tilted his head.
"Do you think I do that in front of just anybody? My life depends on me being vigilant. I can't let go. I can't be afraid. I have to have it together so I can move at a moment's notice. The only person in the last two years I could rely on was me, because as much as I love Colby he just doesn't know the whole story. You know the story. You know what terrifies me. You're the only person who does." And in the back of my mind, I trusted him enough to pull me out of the black panic that was swallowing me. "For a minute I didn't have to be strong."
That said I sat back in my chair and looked out over the noisy crowd, a little embarrassed. Which was stupid. The man had read my diary/scrapbook after all. There wasn't much worse I could admit. "So now you know," I said after a minute. "Any other questions?"
"Would you prefer a large wedding, or would an intimate ceremony suffice?"
My head snapped around. "What?"
He grinned devilishly.
Sweet relief flooded me. "Oh my god, you jerk! You really had me going." My heart finally restarted.
He tried to contain the smile, but he was failing miserably so he tried to hide it by returning to his food. I could tell he was desperately trying not to laugh.
I leaned my forehead on my hand and shook my head. Klaus with a sense of humor. It was rare, but it was there. At least, I hoped it was a joke. I think it was. For now. That didn't mean I had to take it lying down. "Both."
He paused in the middle of cutting his steak. "Pardon?"
"I want both. Intimate ceremony. Massive party. A classical orchestra and a big band and a modern rock group. I want half classy, half blowout. And I don't want to have to clean up after. Remember that."
His gaze was warm. "Duly noted."
We went home not too long after that. We walked hand in hand from the car, chatting about nothing. He wanted to see me all the way to my door, but when we got to my landing he pulled me to a stop. I was a step above him, wondering what he was up to. He seemed to consider something for a long second, staring at my neck without seeing it.
Then his arms slipped around my waist and pulled me to him. He turned his head and laid it on my chest, right over my heart.
And that's where he stayed. Cuddling me.
It was sweet and scary and profound. Don't make me go into the reasons why. I think those were obvious.
For a second I didn't know what to do. My arms lifted without conscious decision. The next thing I knew I had them wrapped around his shoulders and I was laying my cheek on his crown. He was surprisingly warm. I even got the courage to feather my fingers through the hair on the back of his neck. It made a soft bristly sound.
He sighed.
I chuckled. "You sound like a content cat."
He hummed. "Content is the operative word."
This was nuts. But it was kind of cool. We were going to have a ton of days like today, days when I felt like whacking him over the head with a wooden spoon. There were definitely going to be times when he would probably wish he'd never shown up on my doorstep. I knew that. If this was any indicator of how we'd resolve our issues, though, we had a better chance than I thought.
Two years ago we couldn't have done this. I was a different, more grounded person. Running away had its ups and downs, but I was going to count my improved ability to handle Klaus as one of the ups. "You'd better go," I told him softly, stroking his hair. "It's getting late."
"You could invite me in for a night cap."
"Or I could push you down these stairs for getting fresh."
He chuckled. "I know when I'm beaten."
I leaned back. "Thanks for taking me out to the museum. I enjoyed it."
Klaus was eying me in that way I'd come to associate as purely Klaus. Cat/cream analogy, with a hint of possessive pride. His thumb stroked my sides an instant before his gaze fell to my lips.
He didn't even give me time to meet him in the middle. He surged up and took my mouth like it belonged to him. I guess it did, for all intents and purposes, but experiencing the confident takeover was still startling. His hand slid to cup my cheek, smothering my short gasp, his lips clinging to mine. He angled our heads.
Whoa.
It was like he was making love to my mouth. This was no playful meeting of lips. This was...well, I knew without a doubt what was going through his head right then. It had nothing to do with apologies or teasing.
My eyes slid closed.
It was him that pulled back. Both our chests were rising and falling rapidly. It was a lot hotter in the stairwell than it had been a minute ago. I realized I was clutching his shoulders and slowly let go, wondering what the hell just happened.
He released me and stepped down another step, his lips swollen. His expression was hot enough to catch something on fire. "Goodnight, Caroline."
Only Klaus had the ability to say my name like a benediction.
I, on the other hand, sounded like a dumb blonde. "Uh huh. Night."
I watched him descend slowly, then turning and disappearing down the stairwell. I just barely managed to keep myself from leaning over the bannister to watch him go down the rest of the way.
Oh man. I was in trouble.
I went to my door in a daze, then realized I didn't have my keys. Klaus pulled me out without letting me grab anything. I was forced to knock. A few minutes later Colby opened the door.
I knew right away something was wrong. "What is it?"
Paler than usual, he looked around before pulling me into the apartment by the arm. "Klaus isn't with you?"
"No, he just dropped me off. What's going on?"
He shook his head. There was something so off about him that I started to get scared. "I don't know."
I put my hands on his forearms. "If you don't tell me right now, I'm going to start imagining all sorts of weird stuff. So tell me."
He ran a hand through his hair. "I was taking out the rest of the trash, taking a break, you know? Anyway, I opened the door and there was this note tacked to it."
He pulled me to the couch where all his stuff was scattered, fishing out one piece of paper. "It could mean nothing." He sounded like he was trying to convince himself.
I took the paper slowly. It was just a regular old sheet of computer paper, the words written in a thick, dark marker.
It's coming for you.
To Colby, the message might have seemed ambiguous, even if his instincts were in an uproar. He didn't have my sense of smell to confirm his suspicions.
The paper smelled like death.
To Be Continued...
Author's Note: If you can't access the link from the previous page, simply search for "inertia" "avari" or "klausoline" on scribd and you should be able to find the soundtrack list.
Shorter than usual, but I'm happy for any inspiration at all.
To all who review: Thank you so much. No, my insomnia is unfortunately not better (brought on more by nightmares than a lack of ability to sleep) but at least something productive is coming out of it, right?
