.:. 11 .:.
Energetic creatures were destined to become restless when confined, and Yui Komori was no exception. It depressed her to be locked within the same four walls for an entire week, and she couldn't help but think of herself as a prisoner, biding her time idly and aching for the caress of sunlight. By the third day, she considered herself well-rested and recovered, her stomach healed of its tenderness.
Yet Subaru Sakamaki, in his obstinate ways, refused to allow her to return home. She attempted several methods of evasion—like padding down the hallway at first light—but he always managed to find her and wheel her back towards her chamber. Irritation bubbled in her chest, but she squashed it, for she knew it was his method of kindness.
He wanted her to remain in the safe, secluded environment of the inn for as long as possible. Mobs of curious, judging eyes would be waiting once they stepped out of the threshold, and he was stalling.
He was protecting her, as he always had, and always would.
But Yui knew the ridicule was inevitable, and she would rather face it soon than be tormented with the uncertinity of thought. The village officials were callous men, and she knew they would thrust them onto a stage to be jeered and provoked like a pair of wild beasts. She had grown numb to the insults, but the thought of the target switching to Eve made her insides curdle.
She was an innocent thing who did not ask for the circumstance of her birth. She had no autonomy to be damned, yet she was, and Yui thought it terribly unfair. Wrongdoings were things done by experience, not birthright.
A week had passed, and Yui shielded her eyes in wake of the morning sunshine. For once she welcomed the fresh, nipping chill. However Eve, with her face concealed into her mother's neck, began to wail at the strange drop in temperature, despite being bundled in thick, woolly sheepskin. Yui had kept the fires fed and the windows closed in their chamber, and she couldn't help but regret not weening her daughter into the winter climate. After all, she knew her cottage did not possess the luxury of insulated walls.
It was not a common occurrence for a pair to be leaving the tavern whilst the hour was light, and Eve's incessant cries did little to make them inconspicuous.
She dipped her hood and slunk into Subaru's shadow. Passersby arched their necks to catch a glimpse of the temptress and her infant, each whisper like a wasp's sting.
Soon enough, a crowd manifested itself, and Yui was forced to press her back against the door. Subaru grit his teeth and braced himself before her.
"What?" he snarled, "have you simpletons never laid eyes on a baby before?"
Like the strike of the devil, the weak-willed retreated to the bustle of the market-street. Only burly, thick-skinned men remained, or those few whose curiosity killed their fear.
"Step aside, young master," pressed a man, his creamy hair peeking out beneath his wig. His grey eyes were sunken, his nose hooked. "Don't tarnish your name with the association of such a woman!"
"Such a woman?" Subaru cut his eyes, and Yui could see the jutting veins in his wrist. "I'll associate with whoever the fuck I want. I don't need you money-grabbing assholes to tell me otherwise. Now, know your place and move." His hand shifted to his hip to rest on the handle of his sword, the blade scraping as it was lifted from the scabbard. "Or do I have to cut my way through?"
The man's lips curled. "My, and what must Lord Sakamaki think of his son's loyalties? You must be as mad as that mother of yours to be sweet on a whore—"
Yui could barely follow the youngest's quick movements. His sword whistled through the air—a clean, crisp sound, as gasps and scuffling erupted. The man stumbled backwards to avoid the approaching blade; sweat drenched his brow. He skidded on a shard of ice and thudded to the ground, and Subaru, with a fierce, boiling glare, towered over him and squeezed his foot into his chest. The man wheezed as the the air caught in his lungs, the prick of the blade riveting his throat and running a river of blood.
"You're the mad bastard around here, running off with that shitty mouth of yours," Subaru spat. "I'll fucking kill you!"
Bile rose in her throat. Yui felt both a mixture of fear and sadness when Subaru's temper exposed itself. She knew him to be a gentle man, but rage lived inside of him, and eventually it would grow to be his ruin.
She had no doubt he would kill the man who spoke ill of herself and his mother, and although he would relish in the momentary bloodshed, the guilt would eat away at him, reminding him of what he believed himself to be; a monster. Yui would not allow it.
Soothing Eve's distress with hushed words murmured into her soft, blond head, she clutched her tighter as she stepped to Subaru's side.
"Subaru, please stop!"
The building pressure of his sword ceased, and the blubbering man's head crashed down in relief. Subaru's stance did not relax, however; he kept his arm steeled and turned his head to meet her gaze. His eyes were cold.
"You—shut up."
"No," said Yui, unyielding. "I will not."
"Do you not understand what I said to you?"
"I understood," she nodded, "but I cannot keep my silence and watch you become something you're not, Subaru."
He tore his eyes away and muttered, "What do you know?"
Yui stepped closer. The victim followed her every footstep and clung onto her every word; she was the bargaining chip to his life.
"I know that it would hurt you far more to kill than the man suffering with a cut throat. So, please... don't do this. Value yourself more!"
Subaru swallowed as he processed her statement. Finally, he lowered the sword and cursed under his breath, the blade trembling with his reluctancy. Yui exhaled and gently rested a hand over his. She could feel his tight, calloused knuckles, and she waited until they slackened before withdrawing.
"Come on," she offered a smile, "let's go."
They had scarcely turned their backs to the crowd before the whispers begun. They belonged to the housewives, cloaked in the shade of an awning. The women were either too engrossed in their gossip to be aware of the volume of their statements, or too dim to acknowldege the severity of the youngest's frustration.
"It makes one wonder," a portly woman started, her eyes sparkling at their tender exchange. "If the young lord has fathered the child himself?"
"Indeed! Why else should he defend the temptress, yet alone cut a man down for it?"
"Master Subaru joined Miss Yui in her seclusion for the past week, did he not? The only plausible reason behind his loyalty could be..."
"It's him! The bastard's his!"
Yui stood taller. "Is this world so blackened that you must twist another's kindness into an act of suspicion? Subaru Sakamaki is very dear to me, and I will not have his concern put against him. He's innocent!"
Before she realised it, she had braced herself before him. Many thought it humorous that such a tiny woman could hope to protect him with mere words, and others remained awed by her dignified resolve.
She braved a glance behind her to see Subaru's mouth agape and a flush colouring his cheeks.
Similarly, Yui had come to his defence many years ago when they were both small children. The frost had driven away any budding harvest and the castle's orchids were barren. Shu, who deemed Latin to be synonymous with misery, was dejected that he hadn't been able to leave the grounds to accompany them to the market. Although Subaru denied it, she noticed his gaze straying to a fruit seller's ware.
Shu was not fond of sweets, but he loved apples; preferably the bitter variety, with a hard, bright-green shell. Subaru was quietly kind, and thus, he wanted to bring his brother back a souvenir to lift his mood.
But the little lord, ignorant to the workings of the law, plucked an apple from the crate and dropped it into her basket. He hadn't intended to pay, of course, but he hadn't known the reason to pay. He had everything given to him, spared of the rewards of back-breaking labour and patience, and anything he desired he took without consequence.
"Thief!" the merchant had shrieked, "you wretched brat! C'mere!"
Subaru's eyes widened, and he shrunk as the man raised his hand to strike.
Yui, acting out of instinct, shielded him with her body.
"Stop! It was me! He's innocent!"
His hand came down, and the force tossed her aside, as though she was the weight of a rag-doll. She was not spared for her sex, for she was a scrawny girl of ten, wearing a ragged old cowl. She appeared to be nothing more than a street urchin, not the minister's daughter who should have had enough sense to wear clothes befitting for the cold.
She'd received a black eye and a bloodied nose and the task of calming Subaru's tears. He had always been a crabby, spoilt, snivelling child, but Yui found him endearing. He was like the little brother she never had.
They had taken refuge in a dark, narrow alley, the sky above them fleetingly visible between the colourful ripples of laundry. She dabbed the blood with her sleeve and clasped her hands onto his shoulders. He was quivering.
"Why are you crying, Suba?" she had asked, cocking her head. "You're not hurt, thank goodness. You're safe—we're safe here. It's alright."
He snatched out of her grip and balled his hands into fists. "I-Idiot! Y-You're so stupid, Cricket! What were you thinking? I... what sort'a man am I if I can't protect you?"
Yui's expression softened. He was a boy, not a man, but she hadn't the heart to correct him. "Protect me, huh? Well, next time, I'll let you protect me instead, okay? You can start when we get back, against Shu's nasty old jokes. We'll protect each other," she extended her pinky and beamed. "Promise?"
He roughly scrubbed his eyes and linked his pinky with hers. "...Promise."
The voices in the market-place buzzed in her ears, and she looked around, helpless. Her conviction had fallen unheard.
"The lord's illegitimate child? Could it be true?"
"Impossible!"
"They are awfully close. You know what they say, the apple never falls far from the tree..."
Suddenly, Yui exclaimed with the tug on her waist. Subaru had pulled her flush against him with his hand smothered across her nose and mouth; she could hear her hammering heartbeat.
"And?" he challenged, as though none of her prior defence existed. "What if I have?"
He did not wait around to hear their responses; he viced his fingers around her forearm and dragged her down the street, casting a cautious glance over his shoulder before ducking into a side-street. The air was dirtier here, thick with the stenches of rotting food, waste and disease. It was a poverty-stricken area, and Yui could hear the colic cries of infants within the houses. She itched to tend to them, but she could not run the risk of infection.
Somehow, Eve had drifted into sleep amidst the chaos, and Yui smiled at the sight of her fluttering eye-lids and her puckered lips. Subaru's robes rustled and his weapon clinked as he adjusted his slouch against the wall; he was rubbing his palms to defeat the cold.
"Subaru..." Yui began, "you didn't have to do that. I am thankful for it, but... it is not my intention to drag you down with me."
He scowled, glanced down and flexed his fingers. "I made a—"
He stopped himself and took a step towards her. The space was cramped, and with his height and the seriousness flashing in his eyes, Yui started to sweat with intimidation.
"If that bastard doesn't have the balls to come out, then it's about time someone did," he continued, his expression hard. "I believe your fucking silence will last forever, but that face of hers won't. Give it up—tell me his name."
He was pacifying not only his father's, but the villager's unrest with a name; he was diverting the attention to himself so she and Eve could live in relative peace. All at the cost for the truth, which she could not divulge. Yui was disgusted with herself.
"I can't. I'm sorry."
He growled and his fist collided with the wall, the crumbling stone dusting her shoulders. Yui jumped and Eve awoke and howled, but his rage had turned him blind, and he paid them no mind.
"After all these years, you don't trust me, is that it? You think I'd go blabbing to my old man?"
"Subaru, no! I trust you, so, so much, it's just...!"
"What? Don't give me another bullshit excuse."
She closed her eyes and inhaled through her nose. "I... I can't burden you with this."
Yui never confided in Subaru as much as she should have. Although he was her closest friend, he was younger than she, and a part of her always believed that her problems were things he should not have had to concern himself with; he had enough familial drama to contend with. She'd pulled wool over his eyes, for she did not want to sully the perception he had of her. Yui was not as strong as he thought, nor was she as fearless. Subaru always saw her best, and Shu her worst.
Shu and herself were not in agreement over many things, but protecting Subaru was one of the few.
They both refused to lay any burdens upon his shoulders.
His confusion ebbed his aggression. "...Burden me? What the fuck does—"
"It would hurt you to know," she interrupted, softly. "Please trust me. I am not withholding this out of spite, or stubbornness, or whatever you may think. Your ignorance is protecting you." His jaw tightened and he looked away, biting his tongue. "After all, that's what you and I do," she resumed, half-serious, wiggling her pinky finger. "We protect each other."
His eyes widened and he turned to look down the stretch of the passageway; he was hiding his embarrassment.
"I know this may seem unfair to you now," she said, "and you may even grow to hate me for it, but I promise, that if you ever figure it out, I will tell you the truth—I will tell you everything."
He toed the ground. "...I wouldn't."
"Eh?"
Subaru's head snapped upwards. "You have a damn thick skull. Do I have to spell it out?" Yui gave him a sheepish smile as confirmation; he swore. "I wouldn't... hate you, alright?"
Her lips parted with surprise, and he knocked his knuckles against her forehead. "What are you gawking for? You wanna catch flies?"
Yui shook her head and extended her finger. "Promise?"
He mocked her immaturity, but nevertheless, he connected them. "...Whatever. Promise."
"And I promise to tell you the truth," she said before adding, "but no wild guesses, okay?"
His brows wrinkled with a frown. "Who the hell do you think I am?"
A dear friend, she thought, one I will never deserve.
"Sorry," she laughed.
"You will? Don't kid me with pretty words."
"I will, Subaru. I swear it."
She made her resolve and squeezed his finger tighter.
Yui had lost one love in her life, and the thought of losing another made her heart ache. Would he grow to hate her when the truth was brought to light? Would he hate him? Eve?
However, she knew Subaru Sakamaki did not make promises lightly, and she trusted his word. If the roles were reversed, she knew she could never despise him either, even if he were to pin a knife to her throat.
Perhaps that's what unconditional love is; forgiving somebody when they do not deserve to be forgiven.
.:.
The ground beneath their feet glittered, as though loaded with gemstones, the sun's rays unable to crack the hardened shell of earth. Puddles were glazed over like mirrors, and more than once Yui had lost her footing, only to be caught by Subaru's steady arm and harpooned with jabs about her clumsiness.
The market-place was busy, the chill doing little to discourage the swarms of hagglers—it was a Saturday, after all.
"Oi, what are you planning on doing?"
Yui tipped back her hood. "I... want to visit my father," she answered. "He hasn't met Evie yet. I could be asking too much of him, but... I want her to be christened. I want to do this as traditionally as I can."
Subaru scoffed. "Religion is... weird. What sort'a blessing does a kid get from being dunked in water? A headache, that's what..."
Yui pursed her lips and offered no rebuttal. "Will you wait? Or do you have somewhere to be?"
She gave him a pointed look; he had not ventured to the castle in over a week. Surely his absence was noticed.
"I'll be around—I have an errand to run here anyway," he waved off. "It's not like I'm in any rush to get back to that shithole."
Frowning, she pressed, "An errand?"
He prickled. "W-What? Mind your own damn business...!"
Curious, Yui followed his line of sight. Her eyes met the shop she had frequently visited with Reiji—the pharmacy. She had been well-acquainted with the elderly couple who ran the place, and it grew habitual for them to present her with far more herbs than her pockets would allow for her loyal custom. Reiji would entrust her with a list of ingredients whilst he browsed the aisles; he knew that a pretty face would be a fine haggling tactic.
Yet the question which harrowed her was Subaru's business with such a place. Unless...
"Subaru," she whispered, hugging her daughter close to her bosom. "Is... is he quite well?"
He scratched his scalp, withdrew and unfolded a letter from his pocket.
"Influenza, the doctor's saying," he explained, "it's like the damn idiot wants to die... came home at a stupid hour, frozen to the bone and spluttering nonsense. Mad with fever. He didn't want a doctor and said that he was fine, but our old man insisted... didn't want to be left with all the work, probably." He paused and glanced down at her. "Oi. What's with that face?"
"Both of you... I wish you would value yourselves more. Goodness," she fumed, puffing her cheeks, "look after yourselves! Do you know how much I worry?"
He blinked. "Shit, what's with you? He'll manage."
"Echinacea," Yui continued, furiously racking her brain, "they should supply the seeds. Buy honey and ginger too, for tea. It will soothe the throat and any nausea."
"Honey? He hates—"
"Sweets, I remember," she said, her features furrowed. "He'll manage."
She made Subaru repeat the mental list she had given him before they settled on a time to meet at the church.
"Hey," she said, latching onto his sleeve; he spun around, vexed. "Would you do me a favour?"
"No."
She hung her head and asked once more, her voice listless. "Subaru... please."
He exhaled. "Whatever—what?"
"Would you please... sit and talk to him? I-I mean you don't have to speak, um, just... be there for him. An idle mind can be a person's worst enemy."
.:.
Eve's cries could not be coaxed into silence. Yui approached the church, praying shelter and warmth would dull her child's temper. She flung open the door and slid inside, sighing with relief as she collapsed against the wooden-panel. The scents of damp stone, beeswax and lingering incense wrapped around her like a comforting balm. The watching, judging eyes were no more—she was safe. She was home.
Eve disagreed.
Sunlight spilled down from the circular painted-glass, blinding her eyes and yellowing her curls. Her birthmark, as scarlet as her mother's very own letter, seemed to glow, to pulsate, like a beast clawing at its cage. It was a vulnerable spotlight and Yui sidestepped it immediately. Her wails quieted, but her tiny face remained scrunched into a frown.
"Father?" she called out. "Papa! Are you home?"
She heard footsteps originating from the living quarters, then a moment later, the face of Seiji Komori appearing beyond the railing.
"...Yui? Is that you, my child?"
He took two steps at a time, his handsome, red-gold stitched vestment billowing out like a pair of phoenix wings; she had caught him in the middle of rehearsing for Sunday's sermon. He did not seem to mind the interruption, as his eyes gleamed once he saw his living, breathing daughter in the flesh. He had been sent news of her good health, but words hastily scribbled onto parchment did little to bury his doubts.
"I... I thought to come by," Yui started, cradling her daughter's head to her shoulder. "I'm sorry it couldn't have been sooner."
"Do not worry yourself—you're here now," he dismissed, giving her a crinkly-eyed smile. "Are they strong and healthy?"
Yui's gaze faltered. "Yes, but..."
She was not ashamed of Eve's unusual birthmark, but she fretted over her father's reaction. Surely a man of the cloth would not see a natural oddity, but something ugly and sinful. It sickened her to think of the possibility that he would reject his own granddaughter.
She created distance; Seiji frowned.
"My child, what is it? Are you unwell? Were there complications?"
Yui shook her head and adjusted Eve's crown to rest in the crook of her elbow, exposing her skin to the light. Her father paled and stared, his mouth gasping for words which would not come. Finally, he fumbled for his cross and thrusted it in their direction, as though they were a pair of demons in need of exorcising. His hands trembled; Yui's cheeks burned.
"This... this is the devil's own mark...!"
She startled, shrunk, and gripped Eve's woollen wrap tighter.
"Don't say such a thing! Eve, she's... just a baby. An innocent. Father, see reason, please—"
"...Eve? That is her name?" He blinked in bewilderment, the beads swinging from his fist. "Yui, you are not rendering your case! To name the babe after the temptress...! My, you are a foolish girl. You have only added fuel to the flames. Your options were clear—show repentance, and your sins will be forgiven!"
"I do not seek forgiveness," she answered, "not anymore."
The infant was not the devil. She was conceived in the purest form there is—love. A babe born in the union of a loveless marriage had more fault and less purpose. Society wanted her to apologise for the precious life of her daughter, to hide her away like a dark secret. They wanted her to view her as a regret, as another punishment for her sins. But Yui refused, for all she saw was one of life's most joyous gifts.
Suddenly, her rosary, once her comfort, felt like a shackle. She became hyperaware of its coldness, its weight, and was possessed by the urge to cast it from her neck. It merely served as a reminder to the faith which scorned and abandoned her.
Hope was the solitary thing which stopped her. No matter how grey her days became, she was an optimist who would always believe better days were coming.
"Eve... she is worth every trial, and every hardship I have ever endured. This letter... I see now, that it is little more than a decoration."
"N-No..." Seiji pulled at his hair in frustration; there was a battle of morals raging in his mind. "You are bewitched by your own heart! She is the product of a heart's sinful desire!"
Noticing the torment flashing in his eyes, she came closer. "Do you not love her, papa? She is mine, wholly mine. How can you not love her as you do me?"
With reluctancy, he flicked his eyes down to meet Eve's curious, winking pink. Her chubby arms escaped the wrap of her blanket, and she laid one hand upon the quilt of her mother's letter, and the other upon the minister's wooden cross. She smiled for him, and his features softened, his eyes no longer wild with indecision.
"He..." Seiji swallowed, "he has left very little of his trace in her."
"He is there," said Yui, tracing a finger over her tiny nose and the curve of her lips. "But perhaps that is only the work of a mother's wishful eye."
"Yui... you have made many wrong decisions, and as a minister, I cannot overlook them. But, you have never been a bad judge of character. Tell me this—this man you cherish so, should I feel any ill-intent? If I were to meet this fellow in the street and shake his hand, would I find him... agreeable?"
She sighed and threw a quick glance towards the altar. "Very much so—he is a good man, papa. A good man... in an impossible situation."
.:.
Lord Karl Sakamaki sat in his study, his silvery hair spooling down his back in the blue evening light. He had long ago dismissed the lank-haired servant girl with her clumsy hands fussing about the fires; instead, he warmed his belly with hot wine and his stiffened fingers with the frantic scribbling of his quill.
Business, taxes, villager's requests. It was tiresome, even more so with his heir confined to his chamber slipping the hours away with sleep, fevered nonsense and soup.
He would be lucky to finish this workload by first light. How he longed to feel the thick heat of the tavern and the taste of his woman's lips.
But tonight... it would not be so.
With the twitch of a weary eye, he pushed on, deliberating swapping his wine for coffee. He swooped down his signature and plopped a dollop of scarlet wax onto the document before casting it aside, only to grab another; the height difference of the two piles made him impatient.
Suddenly, there was a soft rap on the door; clipped, he demanded them inside. He recognised them to be his younger son's valet, his hair peppered grey and balding.
"My Lord, excuse the intrusion," said he, bowing. "There is... a troubling matter at hand."
"A matter?" replied the lord, his eyes never straying from the document beneath his nose. "Well, better you make haste and speak of it."
Unabashed, the valet straightened. "Yes, sir, my apologies. There is talk amongst the village that..."
Karl Sakamaki blotted his quill. "My sons are not shy to gossip. Talk is swift and fickle—tamper with it, and all will be well. Is that all?"
"Sir," he pressed on, "you are aware that Miss Komori gave birth to her bastard in the week past—a daughter, cursed with the face of the devil, is what they say. I have been told that Master Subaru... admitted to his... relationship with the woman. The child is certainly... his, My Lord."
The heavy silence dragged.
When Lord Sakamaki finally spoke, it was not surprise, merely a sort of troubled amusement. He was rarely confounded by the twists and turns of life. If anything, he grew to expect the unexpected, and took precautions to avoid them; he was always one step ahead.
"...Is that so?"
The valet's eyes widened. "M-My Lord? What will you have me do?"
"Bring the woman and her child to me," he answered, trailing the feather along his jaw. "I wish to see this devil for myself."
A/N: Once again, you have my apologies for the delay. My health hasn't been great, nor has my motivation. So, thank you for your patience and for your lovely comments. They do make my day brighter!
See you next time :)
allyelle~