Thanks to everyone for all the support and advice!
Big thanks to Cr00cy for making this all readable again.
Italics = Thoughts – Chaos reigns! Multiple people can do it now.
Drunken Boxing
Jaune's eyes popped open as he sat up in his bed and surveyed the room.
He woke up alone for the first time in two days. He supposed it had its pluses and minuses….
On one hand, no Yang.
On the other hand, no monster hangover, and hopefully, no giddy Nora outside his door.
Please be no Nora outside my door.
He stretched out and started to collect his clothes.
If I can make it through the day without an intervention, alcoholic or otherwise, I'm calling today a success.
He walked over to his door and slowly turned the handle, hesitantly pulling open the door open, and letting out a sigh of relief at the lack of pink and white behind the door.
He began making his way down the stairs, breakfast and coffee on his mind. The house was quiet, which thankfully meant that no one else must be up yet.
Good. He wasn't really feeling talking to the rest of the gang just yet.
Which is why he was both disappointed and grateful when he found a pot of coffee already brewed.
He did a quick scan of the living room as he poured himself a cup, and spied a familiar crop of blond hair sitting outside on the stone steps of the home through the sliding glass door.
Eh, I can make an exception to my new anti-social policy.
He made his way over to the entrance.
She turned as he slid the door open and smiled at him.
"Hey you."
"Hey yourself."
"What got you up so early?" He asked.
She shrugged. "Just couldn't sleep, it's been a…busy couple of days."
No kidding.
"So, you're telling me that you don't want to hear about my deep dark secrets?"
She rolled her eyes.
"Jaune, if you bring anymore drama into my life, I can't be held responsible for what happens to you."
"Pssh. You love me."
Whoa, mouth. We are starting off powerfully wrong today huh?
"Uhhh…." He articulated.
Good recovery.
She laughed. "Relax Ladykiller, I know what you mean."
He sighed. She is a merciful Goddess.
"Don't worry though, I'll use it against you later."
Semi-merciful.
He shook his head. "Thanks Bright-Eyes, real kind of you."
"Meh. I'm a merciful Goddess."
Whoa, she's in my head.
"So, whatcha thinking about while you're being a loner?" He asked, taking a seat on the steps next to her.
"Our other loner."
Other loner?
He looked at her confusedly.
"Fond of black, bows, running away." She explained.
Oh.
"Blake."
"Your sharp mind is clearly your best feature." She teased.
"One of us has to fight against stereotype."
"Hey!" She slapped his shoulder. "Are you calling me dumb?!"
"Whhhhaaaaaatttt?" He exclaimed with a smile.
"Jerk."
He laughed, then focused on her again.
"Do you miss her?"
"No."
He waited.
"Yes…maybe." She sighed. "I don't know. I can't fucking believe she ran out on us again. Everyone else is here, no matter what else they had to get through." She scowled. "Except for my good old partner."
"We all had a lot to work through. She probably felt responsible for the Fang being there that night."
For you getting hurt.
She glared at him. "She caught a case of the Jaunes huh? Blaming herself for things she can't stop?"
Dangerous territory brain.
"Nah, you were the one who caught a case of the Jaunes if I remember right."
Bold move brain. He tensed.
She snorted. He felt relief flow through him.
"You're ridiculous."
He grinned at her. "Yeah, I know. Anyway, what are you going to do when she gets back?"
"When?" She questioned.
He shrugged. "We're all too stubborn to stay out of this for too long."
"Someone's feeling more optimistic today."
"Thanks for that..." She smiled at him. "But you're avoiding the question." He finished.
"UUUggghhh!" She groaned.
"Informative." He smiled down at her.
"I don't know. Punch her, hug her, ignore her." She shook her head. "She abandoned us Jaune…she abandoned me."
She took a deep breath.
"It's still a fresh wound, and one that's a little too familiar."
Oh yeah, Raven.
She continued.
"I miss her, I miss being a team, but every time I think about everything we've had to go through these past months, I just get pissed off that she wasn't there when we needed her. When I needed her." Her eyes flashed red. "We were there for her."
He took her hand in his. "I know. You're right to be mad, I'd be furious too, but take it from me - don't lose your partner if you can help it."
She squeezed his hand. "I know. My head agrees with you, but my heart…"
He nodded. "I don't think it's something you need to be ok with right now, or even when you see her. Just be willing to talk, to hear her out." He shrugged. "Or fight it out, and then kiss and make up. Just let me be there for the last part."
He grunted when she elbowed his ribs.
"You're lucky you're cute…in a dorky way."
"I'm pretty sure it's my Semblance."
He managed to block the next elbow.
He grinned. "Feeling better?"
She huffed. "A little."
We did it brain!
Now to build on this success.
"What was your mom like by the way? You met her on the way here right?"
Her visage darkened.
"A bitch."
Dammit brain!
He winced. "Yikes."
"Yeah." She grumbled.
Uhhhhh.
"Want to vent about it?" He ventured.
She lit up. "Do I!?"
"The floor is yours pretty lady." He gestured magnanimously.
A ghost of a smile played on her face before her eyes settled on red.
"So, I finally find out where she's been all this time, something that I've been working on forever by the way. I make my way through this band of misfit toys that make up the bandit tribe, and I get to see her after all these years…and she just kinda…shrugs it off, like it wasn't a big moment. Ask if I want to join her loyal band of losers and rule the galaxy of misery and thievery as mother and daughter."
She inhaled.
"Really?! That's what you're going to lead with? Not 'I'm sorry.' Not 'It's good to see you.' Just 'you've proven yourself.'" She mocked, looking at him.
Jaune, you just need to stay quiet during this part. His brain warned. He listened.
He gave her an understanding nod.
She launched back in. "And then she has the gall to be upset with me when I ask her to use her Semblance! It's the ONLY thing I've ever asked for! And you know the worst part?"
Steady Jaune.
He shook his head.
"She had kidnapped Weiss! She had her locked away the whole time! I can't believe her!" She growled, breathing heavily.
He eyed her warily.
You did good out there Jaune, I'm pro-
"So…we doing the holidays at her or your dad's place?" He could hear himself ask.
You're dead to me mouth.
She glared at him. He watched as the cracks slowly started to form. It started off with a twitch of a mouth, then a snort, then a full on laughing fit.
I can't believe that worked out.
She started to get control of herself, her eyes lilac once more.
"Pretty confident that you're going to make it that far, huh? Who says it wasn't a one-night stand?"
Yeah Jaune, who?
"Oh. I uh…didn't mean to assume…I just…"
"God, you're so easy to mess with." She rolled her eyes. "You're not a one-night stand you dork."
"So are we...a thing?" He asked nervously.
You're doing great up there brain.
She laughed. "Yeah, we're something. This is pretty new to me, I'm not used to front-loading so much of the baggage."
"I could always go find more, don't want to make you uncomfortable." He offered.
She pushed him sideways.
"I'll make it without that, thank you very much."
He laughed.
"You do realize that Qrow is going to try to kill me though, right? I kind of told him this wasn't going to happen."
"So you keep telling me brave knight. You'll make it. I claim you." She eyed him. "Unless you prefer the company of another Branwen?"
He put his hands up defensively. "Nope. Pretty sold on the Yang experience."
"You two are ADORABLE!"
Dammit Nora.
His pink friend continued. "It sounded like you were both pretty sold on the experience the other night."
We're still doing this huh Nora?
Ren saved them. "Nora, behave."
"Awwww."
You're a good man Ren.
"Besides, we need to keep that teasing up for weeks, we can't use it all up now."
You're a terrible person Ren.
Yang laughed.
Weiss tsked as she walked out to join them.
"I WILL get the spray bottle for you two if you don't maintain a respectable distance." She warned.
"Awww, you're no fun Weiss-Cream!" Yang protested.
"She's probably just jealous that she's not going to get serenaded anymore." Nora grinned.
Weiss made a choking sound. "On second thought, do what you need to keep that from happening Yang."
Jaune shook his head, ignoring the jabs. "So, what are you guys up to?"
"About to head into town for supplies. We were hoping you'd join us." Ren replied.
"Yeah, we owned you first, Yang can share!" Nora exclaimed, grabbing his hand and starting to pull him toward the now familiar road. "I have so many questions!"
"Save me!" He called over his shoulder to Yang.
"Karma's a bitch, huh?" She called back grinning, watching as the team of three slowly disappeared from sight with the girl of white slowly following behind.
She took a deep breath.
Ok, my turn to check up on someone.
As Yang walked back into the living room, she could hear the clicking of silverware emanating from the kitchen.
There she is.
She wandered into the kitchen to see Ruby eating some kind of cookie based cereal at the table. 'Cookie Crunch,' the box read.
"You know that's going to stunt your growth, right?"
"It has milk in it!" The red-head defended.
Yang shook her head. "Don't ever grow up Rubes."
The young girl glared at her over her spoon.
She just smiled back.
Ruby sighed. "So...you and Jaune huh?"
Here we go. Be gentle.
"Yep."
Smooth.
Ruby focused on her cereal.
She walked over and took a seat at the table next to Ruby.
"Ruby...how…how did you feel about him? I know we were both flirting there for a while, but I wasn't serious."
"Seems pretty serious now." Her sister countered.
Damn, this is going to be rough.
"It is now, but…it just kinda happened. I mean I liked Jaune as a friend, but then it just started to click. You know?"
The scathing look that her sister was giving her right now informed her that yes, she did understand that particular feeling. She pressed on.
"What about you, how long?"
Ruby sighed. "I don't know. We've always been great friends, but I knew how Pyrrha felt."
Yang nodded sympathetically.
"The we had all that time making our way to Mistral and…"
And I swooped in.
"I'm sorry Ruby. Do…do you want me to back off?" She asked hesitantly.
Her sister looked at her like she grew horns. "Are you crazy?! I haven't seen Jaune this genuinely happy in months! Don't stop doing whatever it is you're doing." She exclaimed.
Her younger sister's eyes found the floor. "I should have said something sooner. I should have helped sooner."
She placed a hand on her sister's shoulder.
"Ruby…"
The younger girl's head popped up. "I just reserve the right to be mad about it for a little bit."
She pointed her spoon in Yang's face.
"And if you drop the ball, I'm swooping in. I learned from the best." She threatened.
She didn't know whether to feel ashamed or proud, so she did all she could do…
She laughed.
Ruby smiled back at her.
"You're on Rubes. I'll mind my p's and q's."
"You better, I'll catch up eventually." The red-head chided playfully.
"So, are we ok?"
Please say yes.
"Yeah, just keep the PDA on the down low for a while, ok?" She winced. "Especially the noise level."
Yang blushed.
"Oh! I uh…thought you slept through all that."
She rolled her eyes. "I did, but have you met Nora? She gave me a play-by-play."
Dammit Nora.
"So…" Ruby continued. "For real. What are you going to do when drunkle Qrow gets back?"
"Hmmm." She considered. "I guess it'll just be a good litmus test to see if Jaune's durable enough to make it in the family. He's still got to meet dad after all."
They both laughed at that. He'd survive...probably.
Qrow was having a bad fucking day.
He had found none of the Huntsmen on his list. Not one. It seemed impossible for that many Huntsmen to disappear in a region. Something was very wrong.
His head was spinning. He'd known so many of those Huntsmen on a personal level, and now they were just…gone.
He'd done the only thing that made sense in such an unfair and uncertain world.
He'd gotten hammered.
Being drunk had cleared his head, allowed him to think clearly. Being so enlightened, he had come up with a solution to his current problem.
He was going to murder someone.
All it would take was a quick walk, or stumble, back to the house to pack a few essentials and he'd be on his way. Oz would understand, and if he didn't? Fuck him.
He reached the steps of the house and steadied himself on the banister as he made his way to the door. He'd lost his keys, but the lock hadn't proved too much of a difficulty when persuaded with the proper amount of blunt force. Now all he had to do was make his way down the hall and into the kitchen.
He'd only pack the essentials of course. He'd need to travel fast, he'd need to travel light.
Scotch, macaroni, candy bars, cookies, more scotch…damn, some asshole had eaten all the Pumpkin Pete's. Oh well, desperate times and all that.
"Qrow?"
He whipped around to confront the new threat, pointing his flask at it menacingly.
"What the hell are you doing? Do you know what time it is?" Jaune asked.
Oh good, it's just the kid.
Jaune rubbed his eyes tiredly as he stood in the entrance of the kitchen, staring questioningly at the older Huntsman.
"H-hey kid. Tyme for zom damn paybak iz wha tyme zit iz."
The kid looked at him in silence for a moment.
"Holy shit, you're plastered."
He held a finger to his lips. "SSShhhhh. Don tell anybodee, itz a seek-crat"
The kid's face scrunched up.
"Qrow, you can't go out there like this, you'll get yourself killed."
"Psssshh. Not da firssst tyme I heard dat one Jaunyyy- boi."
"Qrow, seriously, you can't leave. Go to bed."
This arrogant mother-
"Annn whozz gonna stop mee? You kid?"
The kid's eyes widened.
"Don't do this Qrow."
Can't believe you don't get this kid.
He pointed a finger at the kid. "Dey were mai friends kid, sumboddy iz gonna pay."
"In the morning Qrow, we can get them then." Jaune pleaded.
Damn coward.
"No. Now. Get out of mai way kid."
The kid's stance shifted. It was slight, but he could see it.
"I won't let you get yourself killed you drunk bastard."
It's gonna be like that huh?
"Your funeral kid."
He struck fast, he struck hard.
His fist sank into the knight's stomach, lifting him up off the ground. Jaune doubled over holding his midsection with a grunt.
I told you to move kid.
He began to move around the boy, intent on making his way to the entrance of the house, when he buckled under something slamming into his knee.
"I said…you're not going anywhere…you dumb bastard." Jaune wheezed.
"You don wanna doo dis kid." He warned.
The young man stood up again.
"Try me."
The kid blocked the next blow, a drunken hook, and pushed into the older man, intent on clinching with him. That worked fine for him. He caught Juane behind the head and pulled him into a headbutt, then slammed his elbow into the boy's temple as he reeled back from the first blow, sending him to the ground again.
Stay down kid.
"Did eww know you're waaayy to stuuborn?"
Jaune rolled to his hands and knees, shaking his head.
"Did…did you know you hit like a bitch?"
The kick caught Jaune in the ribs and sent him tumbling into the hall.
Jaune rolled with the blow, coming up in a crouch and diving at Qrow, trying to drag him down.
The older man caught him behind the head again, only feel the knight's fist slam into his liver.
You want to play rough kid?
He slammed the younger man's head into the wall, once, twice, three times, leaving dents in the drywall before letting him drop.
"Night kid."
He stepped over the prone form once again, continuing on to the door, to vengeance.
He wasn't sure what surprised him more, the kid's arms wrapping around his waist, or the feeling of weightlessness as the boy suplexed him backwards onto the floor.
"God, you're an asshole. Stay down 'drunkle.'" Jaune panted as he slowly pushed himself up on the wall.
Qrow's world was red with rage.
This fucking guy.
Jaune couldn't follow the speed with which Qrow regained his feet and covered the distance between them. He pulled the kid into his knee, feeling the air leave him in a rush. He was finishing this fight. He slammed the knee home again and again until he felt something give.
He tried not feel guilty as his young student clutched his side in agony from his place on the floor.
I owe them kid.
"Oz will fix eeww up in da mourning kid." He muttered.
He felt a hand grasp his ankle as he walked away.
"F-funny...I was going to say the same…to you." Jaune gasped.
Gonna have to put you out, huh kid?
He knelt down and began applying the necessary pressure to the kid's neck as the boy's hands fought feebly to free himself, his eyes beginning to drift close.
Just go to sleep kid.
"Hello? Who's there?"
Dammit Oz.
Suddenly the gravity of the situation hit him.
He was choking a student unconscious while drunk off his ass, all so he could leave on an unsanctioned vendetta. There would be no forgiveness for something this heinous. No one would trust him anymore.
Not that I deserve it.
He released the kid, who started coughing and sputtering as blood and air returned.
"Jaune?" A feminine voice called out from the stairs.
Yang…no...dammit.
It was over. This was how he went out, in a drunken stupor…fitting.
The boy shakily propped himself up on an elbow.
"G-give me your flask you son of a bitch."
He stared in confusion as the boy snatched the flask from his hip.
The footsteps had reached the bottom of the stairs. They'd be rounding the corner any second.
He watched dumbfounded as the kid opened the flask and upended it on himself before placing it to his lips and draining the remainder before throwing it away.
Oz and Yang rounded the corner.
He braced himself.
"Jaune!" Yang cried.
"What is the meaning of this!?" The young headmaster demanded.
Time to come clean.
He began to open his mouth to seal his fate, to leave the circle of trust.
"Yaaaannnngg!" Jaune drunkenly exclaimed.
What the hell?
"Jaune what happened? You're bleeding!" She shouted worriedly.
"Qrow an mee were drinkin!" He grinned. "I asked em to show mee sum mooves."
"What!?"
"Yeah, but we, uh…got carried away hehe."
There's no way.
He was dumbstruck. There were no other words. The kid couldn't possibly be covering for him. Couldn't possibly expect to pull this off.
Ozpin's harsh gaze shifted back and forth between the broken knight and himself.
"Qrow." He focused in on the older Huntsman. "Is this true?"
His jaw worked up and down wordlessly as he fought for the sobriety to explain the madness of the situation to his old friend. To make sense of what was unfolding before him.
"Qrow! Tell him bout da drinkin gamez." Jaune encouraged excitedly as Yang fought with his hands to better examine his injuries.
Ozpin looked over the boy once again before returning his gaze to Qrow.
"I'm extremely disappointed in you old friend. You of all people should understand how short of allies we are." He paused, looking at him meaningfully. "We can't afford to lose anyone else."
"…Yeah." Was all he could manage.
"Miss Xiao Long, please see Mr. Arc to his room. Carefully if you please, I believe those ribs are broken." He took a deep breath. "Qrow…sober up. We'll talk about this in the morning, when everyone is...in their right mind."
Qrow watched as his niece gingerly picked the giggling kid up and slowly worked their way down the hall, mummering quietly to him as they walked, trying to comprehend the events of the last five minutes and they young man's actions.
The best he could come up with was a thought of nothing short of awe…
This fucking guy…
Omake
A Different Welcome Home.
Being drunk had cleared his head, allowed him to think clearly. Being so enlightened, he had come up with a solution to his current problem.
He was going to murder someone.
All it would take was a quick walk, or stumble, back to the house to pack a few essentials and he'd be on his way. Oz would understand, and if he didn't? Fuck him.
He reached the steps of the house and steadied himself on the banister as he made his way to the door. He'd lost his keys, but the lock hadn't proved too much of a difficulty when persuaded with the proper amount of blunt force trauma. Now all he had to do was make his way down the hall and into the kitchen.
He'd only pack the essentials of course. He'd need to travel fast, he'd need to travel light.
Scotch, macaroni, candy bars, cookies, more scotch…damn, some asshole had eaten all the Pumpkin Pete's. Oh well, desperate times and all that.
"Hey Drunkle Qrow."
He whipped around to confront the new threat, pointing his flask at it menacingly.
Ruby sat at the kitchen table eating a bowl of cereal and watching him with a bored expression.
"What you up to?"
"Imma kill zome bad peeple Short-Back." He explained.
"Yeah? That sounds like fun."
Finally, someone who gets me.
"But you know what else might be fun?"
She pulled the cereal box around for him to see.
Holy shit, are those Pumpkin Pete's?
"If you poured some of your booze into this delicious breakfast cereal like a normal person and then went to bed."
I do love booze and cereal.
"Butt...revenge." He whined.
She looked at him quizically. "Revenge? Like 'Revenge of the Ninja' the video game? You know, I was playing Yang today and she said I'm definitely better than you."
These lies couldn't be allowed to stand.
He pointed...somewhere near her, accusingly. "Yule neebber beat mee."
She shrugged. "Maybe, or maybe I'll wipe the floor with you. Only one way to find out I guess."
"Imma crussh your dreeeams kiddo."
After Pumpkin Pete's.
"After Pumpkin Pete's?" She asked.
"Yeah." He said sitting down next to her.
Qrow made it approximately through half of his bowl of cereal before passing out face first into his concoction of liquor and sugary breakfast.
Ruby sighed as she fished him out and slid a pillow under his head. He'd keep until morning.
So concluded their normal ritual of her dear uncle coming completely plastered and ready to take on the world. Luckily, this wasn't the first time, nor was it the tenth.
She was just glad no one else had tried to confront him. That could have ended poorly.
JJD Thoughts: So in the process of editing this chapter, Cr00cy told me that he was glad that I hadn't made Jaune beat Qrow in the chapter, as it would have seemed like he was moving too fast. What struck me about this was that I hadn't even thought about it, Jaune was always going to get his ass kicked, because of course he would. I understand exactly what Cr00cy is talking about though, many shows/fics/books, rush towards the maturation of a character either emotionally, or in the case we're talking about, physically. I've always enjoyed it when the advancement of a character feels earned. I think this comes down to a few things:
In my personal experience, it takes a long time to reach a level of skill that Qrow would have over Jaune, and very few things are going to bridge that gap. For instance, I'm at a middling level of jiu-jitsu at purple belt, but I can still handle lower belts even when I'm not at my best (sick, injured, etc.). When I'm fully rested? I can kind of choose how I want most fights to end with them (which is a trippy feeling when you look back on where you started). So Qrow, with 20 odd years of experience (who by the way, doesn't have any long term training injuries because of Aura), fighting young Jaune? He's going to do fine, drunk or not. There are definitely exceptions to this. The first being "luck." Fighting comes down to identifying opportunities for yourself, and denying them for your opponent. The better you are, the more opportunities you can identify and deny. However, if you roll the dice enough times, eventually the odds won't pop up in your favor. You see this all the time with upsets in the fighting world (Buster Douglas vs Mike Tyson), where an underdog put it on the line, and the odds came up in their favor. There's a reason they're called underdogs though, because it doesn't happen very often. The other is freak athletes (seriously fuck these guys). An amazing athlete with even a small amount of skill is instantly dangerous, and require you to capitalize on your strengths and exaggerate their weaknesses. They require you to fight mean (see what I did there?). Pyrrha is a great example of this. She is young, but stands head and shoulders above the other students because she's naturally gifted (she's also a hard worker, which makes her a nightmare to deal with).
Probably more importantly, it breaks me out of the story. When character progression is done right, I shouldn't think about it, it should just be something that I accept. I shouldn't be thinking about how the protagonist was just getting their ass kicked a few episodes ago, and is now an unstoppable force. This is a problem I have with a lot of anime, in which the main character constantly grows in power without ever changing themselves or 'earning' it. An example of it being done correctly would be Katara from Avatar, who so gradually grows in confidence and strength that at no point do we as the audience even remark on the gains. The character has never 'changed' in our eyes, they've just 'grown.' You can break this rule sparingly and have it be effective, but it needs to be rare. Super Saiyan is the classic example. The first time it happens, it turns the entire story on its head because it changes all the power dynamics in an instant. But now that it's been done over and over, it just rings...hollow.
Cr00cy thoughts: Yes this was one thing I wondering how JJD would handle for few weeks now (yes I know plans for few chapters ahead). This was one thing that always irritated me in any show - be it books, comics or movie - that included experienced fighter training someone. When you start out, it easy to make noticeable progress. But to get actually good - or surpass someone who's practiced for years - you will have to work yourself to death. It is almost impossible to get on decent level with only a few weeks, or even months of training. And even when you practiced some other form of fighting, especially with weapons, you will NOT be good at any other. Yes, you will be better than complete newbie, but different weapons, even if they look similar, have different techniques, balance, they just work differently.
I remember, few years back when i was practicing HEMA I met this one guy who practiced olympic fencing for few years (he even won some tournaments). He was really good with a saber - he beat me every time we fought. But when we added shields to mix? I was able to win easily. Simply because I had more practice with a shield, and his knowledge from fencing not only didn't help, but actually held him back.
So if any of you ever got to write story with fighting in it, remember - make progress gradual. no one become master after month of training.
PLUG TIME!
JJD: Cr00cy and myself are currently working on another fic that will launch here in near (near-ish) future that will be an alternate take on the RWBY series focusing on...wait for it...Jaune. It'll be the same combination of sarcasm, humor, and violence that you (hopefully) have come to know and love in FM. Except, you know...better written, cause Cr00cy is writing it.