11. Don't Let Steve See The List
Remember that list I mentioned before? The list of things to make sure Steve never finds out about? Well guess what Steve found out about. The list.
I kept the list close to me at all times. It could usually be found in my shoe or tucked away in my hair somehow. The one time it wasn't in either of those places, I left it out on the kitchen counter for everyone to see. And by everyone, I really just mean Steve. Everyone else had already seen at least part of it. In fact, they gave me a bunch of ideas for the list. Not that they came up to me and said, "Sarah, you should add this to the list." No, they gave me ideas by doing weird, awkward, and inappropriate things.
It was a Tuesday evening. I was on Christmas break, leaving me with plenty of time to do anything I wanted to do. I was in the kitchen making some macaroni and cheese. After dumping my food into a bowl, I slid into a bar stool at the counter and pulled the small sheet of paper out of my ponytail. My eyes scanned the paper, taking in its contents for the umpteenth time.
Things to Make Sure Steve Never Finds Out About
1. Avengers fanfiction
2. The Avengers tag on tumblr
3. Avengers slash fanart
4. Keeping Up With The Kardashians
5. Justin Bieber
6. Specifically, Justin Bieber's song 'Baby'
7. Hotter Than My Daughter
8. Darth Vader is Luke's dad (at least until he sees the movie)
9. The ending to 'The Titanic'
10. The ending to 'The Fault in Our Stars'
11. The Furby
12. That time when Tony used Steve's toothbrush
13. That time when Tony got drunk (hairdryer incident)
14. That other time when Tony got drunk (pikachu + bubblegum incident)
15. Miley Cyrus
16. That time Clint & Tasha let me get kidnapped
17. That time I went on that date
18. That time I broke the dishwasher
19. That time I broke the garbage disposal
20. Actually… anytime I broke anything
21. That time Nat borrowed Steve's shield
22. The time I used Steve's shield as a sled
23. Honey Boo Boo
24. Anaconda
25. Wrecking Ball (video)
26. The time Thor broke Steve's bed
27. The time Tony got drunk and found a bunny
28. The one fanfic Coulson wrote
39. The time I tried to hook Sharon Carter up with Steve
30. The time I let a fangirl into Steve's room
31. Twerking
32. The time I spat in Steve's drink
"Sarah! We're having a pop culture night for Steve again tonight," Tony called, entering the room. "Got any ideas of what we should do?" I glanced down at my paper, then back up at Tony.
"We could have a Star Wars marathon. Or we could watch the Titanic. But I think we should watch Star Wars before Steve finds out about Luke and Vader's relationship," I said, stuffing my face with macaroni after I finished talking.
"Relationship? Funny, I don't remember anything like that in the movies," he replied.
"I was not referring to a romantic or sexual relationship. I was talking about the paternal plot twist."
"Ah, yes. Capsicle may be the only adult left in North America to not know about that," he paused, grabbing strawberry yogurt from the fridge. "Star Wars it is." He exited the room.
Minutes later, he came running back in.
"Clear the area! We have a situation!" He shouted.
"What? Tony, have you been day drinking again?"
"No! Well, maybe just a bit. Regardless, Katniss and the other master assassin are having an argument, and they're headed this way," he responded
"Oh. Well. You're right, we should leave. I just have to put my dishes in the-" I was interrupted by yelling coming from the stairway.
"No time," Tony said, grabbing the bowl and glass from my hands and practically throwing them on the counter. His hand wrapped around my arm and he yanked me out of the kitchen just as the two SHIELD agents entered the room.
Steve walked into the lounge that Stark and I were hiding in, the one that was right next to the room that held the arguing spies.
"Don't go in there!" I cried, catching Steve about to enter the war zone. His hand hovered just above the doorknob, and he turned his head so he could look at me.
"Why?"
"Clint and Tasha are having an argument," I replied. He turned back to the door and opened it. "Fine! Enter at your own risk!" I called after him.
After the door opened, I could hear the argument clearly.
"Yes, but that didn't mean that you could dye it brown!" I heard Clint yell.
"I do what I want!" Natasha screamed back. I then heard Steve clear his throat.
"What exactly is the problem here?"
"Agent Romanoff dyed my blanket brown," Clint growled. He used 'Agent Romanoff' instead of 'Nat' or 'Tasha' or even 'Natasha'. It must be serious.
"Yes, I did, because Agent Barton gave it to me."
"To borrow, not to keep!"
"Why don't you just get another blanket?" Steve asked. I zoned out at that point knowing that the super soldier would be able to get them to calm down.
A while later, Steve came into the room holding a piece of paper.
"What's this?" He asked, turning the paper around so I could see what it was. I squinted, but I still couldn't make out what was on the sheet.
"It looks like my writing. Where did you-" I stopped mid sentence, the terrible realization dawning on me. "Crap. Not good." I rubbed the back of my neck awkwardly, my face turning red. "You didn't happen to not read that, did you?"
"What's slash fanart? And when did you use my shield as a sled?" He enquired, ignoring my question.
"Please tell me you didn't read the one about Darth Vader," I said, instead of answering his question.
"Yeah. I also read number thirty, 'the time I let a fangirl into Steve's room.' Oh, and number thirty two, 'the time I spat in Steve's drink.'"
"Okay, well, that last one was an accident. Sort of." I sucked in a breath in a sharp gasp. "Tony's going to kill me."
"Why? Because of number twelve?"
"No, because of the Darth Vader spoiler!" I exclaimed.
"Hmm. Well, would you care to explain the rest of these? I'm particularly interested in the time time Natasha and Clint let you get kidnapped."
I giggled nervously. "Right."
A/N: GUESS WHAT? I UPDATED. AND THIS IS THE LONGEST CHAPTER YET. Also, we're at 39 reviews. ALMOST 40! Thanks so much!
Please review because it makes me happy.
I do not own the things.