Finally finished it! This was a little harder to write for me, since i couldn't get into the right head space. But it's done! Enjoy!
I do not own these characters
He failed. If he only he was more vigilant, paid more attention then maybe…! Maybe Jason wouldn't have died. No, this was on him. He should have noticed the signs sooner, he should have helped Jason instead of pushing him further away. He should have… he should have never let Jason get involved. It was a foolish mistake. One that Jason paid for. God, he was so young…
"Alfred, I'm returning to the cave." "Very well sir." Alfred didn't say anything else, for which Bruce was glad. Telling Alfred earlier had made it seem… to real. It brought home his failure to protect Jason. To keep him safe. God. If only he had arrived a little earlier, caught what was going on a little quicker… But no. He can't dwell on the what ifs. What's done is done and he can't change that. Not anymore.
As the bat mobile pulled into the cave, Bruce was a little slower than normal getting out. His body felt like lead; as if he was unconsciously afraid to set foot into the cave. Walking in, he saw Alfred standing near the computer monitor. As he approached, he saw that Alfred's eyes where slightly red and puffy. It made the dagger of guilt bury itself a little deeper into his heart. "Welcome back sir. Shall I begin the funerary arrangements?" All Bruce could do is half-heartedly nod his head. He then numbly took off his suit. Stopping at the foot of the stairs, he turned towards Alfred, in a gravely tone that was about to break he asked "Is Damian sleeping?" "Yes sir, I put him to bed three hours ago." That was good. His son will remain oblivious for a little while more, unaware of his father's failure. "Alfred, I'll be out early tomorrow so I'll be missing breakfast, while I'm out, don't tell Damian about Jason." "Very well sir." Agreed Alfred, much to Bruce's Relief.
He needed to see his son. Make sure that he was alright. Getting upstairs he headed towards his sons room, where he was sleeping peacefully. Watching his son's steady breathing, a horrible thought struck through his head, it could have not just been Jason who died, but also his own son. The horrible thought struck his heart. If he had lost Damian… Watching his son sleep, Bruce made a vow to himself: Never again. He will never again put a child into that situation. And most importantly of all, his son is forbidden from ever putting on a suit. Not as long as Bruce lived. He would not permit it.
When Damian woke up, he knew something was wrong. Everything just felt a little… off? He didn't know how to describe it. Getting out of bed, he rushed downstairs. Entering the kitchen, Damian saw that Alfred was setting the table up as usual, but nether his father nor Jason was there. "Hey Alfred?" "Yes Master Damian?" "Where is Jason and Daddy?" Timidly Inquired Damian, "Your father is currently out at the moment, as is Master Jason." Came the curt reply. "Oh." That was weird. Jason never got to go out that late. However, upon seeing the big pile of pancakes, Damian quickly forgot about his concerns. As he poured a massive amount of syrup, more then what was necessary really, Alfred spoke "Master Richard will be coming to visit later today." "Really?" Asked Damian excitedly. At Alfred's nod, Damian beamed and attempted to shove all of his pancakes into his mouth at once, nearly choking in the process. "Slow down Master Damian, less you choke." He didn't want to slow down, he wanted to go to his room and get everything ready for when Dick came. But he did as Alfred asked.
Once he was done he ran up into his room and started to plan all the stuff he wanted to do with Dick and Jason. He didn't want Jason to feel left out, even if he was away on some super important mission.
When Dick did finally arrive, it wasn't through the manner. Clad in his Nightwing costume, Dick stood in front of the monitor, where Batman was currently hunched over. "I can't believe it…" Muttered Dick, "How did it…" "The Joker happened. He blew up the warehouse before I could reach him. If I had only been a little faster…" "Hey, Bruce, listen it wasn't your fault." "But it was!" Cut in Bruce, "I got Jason involved in this, and he died because of it." "And so what? Would you have rather left him in the streets? Because I guarantee you that that wouldn't have been any better." Argued Dick, but all he received was a grunt in response. "Listen, I'm going to stay the week. You aren't in the right frame of mind right now, and god knows how Damian is dealing with the news…" "He doesn't know." "What?" "Damian doesn't know, and you aren't going to tell him." Dick was baffled, "Doesn't know? Bruce, don't tell me you don't intend to tell him that Jason died!" "What of it?" It took Dick a moment to gather his words, he was so flabbergasted. "You can't just…" "I can, and I will. He is my son, and I don't want him to ever experience the feelings of losing someone. Not yet. You of all people should know how devastating a loss like that can be."
Dick didn't know what to say. On one hand, he knew that Bruce was wrong, but on the other, he understood. He also knew that as much as he wanted to, he couldn't be the one to tell Damian, it wasn't his place. So in the end, Dick agreed. He agreed, but it didn't mean he had to like it.
After Dick left the Cave, Bruce looked over the case file a few more times, running through the scenarios, trying to see what he could have done differently, better. In the end, he couldn't find the answer. Guilt ate at his heart. Giving up, he headed upstairs to see his son and Dick watching a Disney movie. Mulan, by the looks of it. That was one of Damian's favorites. Damian was chatting happily as Dick nodded along. "Hey boys, mind if I join you?" "Daddy!" Cried Damian excitedly, getting up, Damian rushed over and jumped on his father. "Where were you all day? Alfred said you were busy on a secret mission! And where's Jason?" Inquired his son at a rapid paste, "I was going over some things, and Jason is currently undergoing some training in Tibet." "Tibet?" "Yes. I trained there myself, it was very peaceful." Bruce could see Dick disapproving stare, but he didn't say anything. "But Jason didn't say anything about it…" "That's because he didn't want to make you feel bad." Stated Dick, Bruce gave him a grateful smile. "Oh… Okay, I guess. When will he come back?" "I'm not sure, training there can take years sometimes." "Well Jason's smart. I'm sure he'll be back in no time." Hearing this, Damian reluctantly gave up asking anymore questions. Instead going back to watch his movie, with his father and older brother right there beside him.