Chapter 11: Stupid bolt, Pt. 2

15 minutes earlier...

Asuka ran out of the control room and down the hall, tears streaming down her cheeks and spotting the floor. Her hair billowed out behind her as she turned the next corner and ran down a helpless NERV technician pushing a cart with assorted boxes and tools.

"Sorry!", she yelled out as she increased her speed and headed for the Eva hangars, Unit 02's in particular.

Dammit, Asuka!, she thought as she barreled down the hall, knocking down another cart of supplies as she went, What is wrong with you? Why can't you get it together, huh? You could have told them... You know you could have! He was right there...

She reached Unit 02's hangar and activated the hand scanner. As soon as the door had opened enough for her to fit through, she squeezed in and ran to her Evangelion. She slid to a stop in front of it and collapsed against the massive faceplate. She slammed her fists down onto the four foot thick steel plating and screamed in frustration.

"DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT!", she yelled over and over as she beat her fists bloody, stopping only when she became aware of her broken skin, "Why do I have to feel like this... Why does it have to be... To be... Him..."

She pushed herself away from the bio-mech at this point and surveyed her hands, mildly shocked at the damage. As she turned her hands over, she could feel... something... boiling up inside of her.

"Way to go, Asuka...", she growled, "Now look what you've done to yourself... And all because of..."

She stopped herself from saying the name. She couldn't believe that she was getting this worked up over someone as (amazing) frustrating as... as... as Him... Of all people, he had to be the one to make her feel like this. And, the worst part was, he had no idea...

Misato was right... They had asked her what was wrong with her numerous times. And, truth be told, she had almost told them. But, each time, her stubborn side took control and prevented her from opening up. And each time she had to tell them that nothing was wrong, a little more of her (heart) spirit was broken.

The more she looked back, the worse she felt. Fresh tears started to make their way down her cheeks and she reached up to wipe them away when she stopped, realizing that somebody was bound to come looking for her.

Not wanting anyone to find her like this, she quickly scanned her surroundings and, catching site of the elevator, made her way towards it.

All I need is to be by myself for a while, get myself in order, she lied to herself as the elevator doors slid open at her stop, As soon as I calm down, I'll go back to them. Everything will be fine... Shinji will be fine... I'll..

She froze at that last little bit. She looked down at the floor, her cheeks burning. Small drops fell from her face and landed on the floor with small plops. She stepped out of the elevator and shivered as the frigid air hit her.

She wiped the newest tears away and started for the other side and the small alcove she knew was there. She could hide away for a little bit until she calmed down. As she made her way across the catwalk, she came across a small security gate and pulled it open, not worrying to pull it closed behind her.

She walked directly underneath one of the massive air conditioning outlets and shivered again as the blast of near-arctic air enveloped her momentarily. The fact that her cheeks were still wet didn't help the matter, and she pulled her NERV-issued sweatshirt up over her nose and crossed her arms.

If only these were His arms...

She paused at the thought before picking up her pace and reaching the other side. She turned the corner and collapsed against the wall, small sobs starting to escape her. She pulled her knees up against her chest, partly to have something to lean on, but mostly from the cold.

She sat there for several minutes, nuzzling her face into her knees as the sobs slowly escaped her. In between sobs, one could occasionally make out actual words... Words which sounded awfully similar to "Shinji" and "like" and "dammit".

These were the words that one Shinji Ikari was now hearing as he stood silently watching the redhead sobbing against the wall, a stunned expression on his face.

No... It can't be... Does she really...But, how... I...

His mind raced as the implications of what he was hearing sank in.

Was this what's been bothering her? All this time...

Shinji's foot caught a stray bolt lying on the floor, sending it clanging between the slats in the catwalk and down 20 stories to the ground below. He clenched his eyes shut momentarily in an "oh shit" manner before opening them again.

Asuka's head snapped up as the bolt made its descent and she immediately locked on to her (welcome) visitor. As they made eye contact, her heart stuttered for a moment, and she had to resist the urge to run to him.

Not now... Not like this... I can't let him see me like this... I can't...

"Ummm... Hey, Asuka..."

Asuka searched for something to say, but found herself at a lost. Everything she wanted to say...

Everything I need to say...

Her mouth betrayed her at this point, taking its cue from the ever-shrinking part of her brain that still yearned for how things used to be, when she was number one and Shinji was just a pathetic little insect that happened to be a coworker.

"Go away, baka...", said Asuka coldly, burying her face back into her knees in shame.

Don't go away... I need y...

"Asuka... What's wrong?", asked Shinji, a genuinely caring note in his voice, "You ran out of there like something was chasing you... Please, talk to me. Tell what's the matter..."

"I said go away, Shinji!", Asuka repeated, her voice breaking slightly as she looked up from her knees, "I just want to be alone, alright?"

I don't want to be alone... Dammit! I still can't tell him...

To her pleasant surprise, Shinji did not run away. To the contrary, in fact. He took a few steps closer and knelt down so as to be on eye level with Asuka.

Misato told me not to let her dissuade me... Do this for her, Shinji... Don't run away... You can't run away, dammit! Not this time...

"No"

The word hit Asuka with the same impact as a fully laden jetliner. She met his gaze as he stared at her with a determined expression on his face. She opened her mouth to protest, but found herself unable to. All she could do was move her jaw up and down as she tried to gasp out what she wanted to say.

Mein Gott...

"No, Asuka...", Shinji continued, his eyes still locked onto hers, "I'm not going anywhere. At least until you tell me just what the hell is wrong with you. There is obviously something bugging you, I mean come on, look at yourself... This isn't the Asuka I know and..."

He paused at that point. Asuka kept looking at him, waiting for him to finish what he was going to say.

Oh God... Please... Please finish that sentence...

Instead, Shinji looked away, his eyes seeming to look through the wall to his right. He turned back after a moment and smiled.

"Asuka..."

She was finally able to coerce her mouth into obeying her as she replied.

"Yes, Shinji?"

"You know what... Never mind... Later... I'll tell you later... How about that?", he said after a moment of thought, the subsequent smile he gave her sending a warm tingle down her spine.

"O.. Okay...", she stammered, somewhat disappointed. She almost screamed when Shinji lightly poked her on the leg. She had been so looking forward to what he was going to say that she had zoned out for a moment.

"Now... Back on topic... Namely, you...", he said quietly, his voice warm and calm, "Asuka... Please... What's the matter?"

Asuka finally broke eye contact at that point and looked away. She still wasn't ready for this... She still couldn't tell him...

"Shinji, I... I can't.. I... I don't know... ", she whispered.

She had exhausted all other excuses over the past couple of weeks. As she sat there, desperately trying to come up with something... anything... to tell Shinji, she felt a slight pressure come to rest lightly on her knee.

She looked down and saw Shinji's hand resting gently on her kneecap before turning her gaze back to him.

Mein Gott... That... That feels so.. so... right... Shinji... I... Please...

"Asuka... Don't worry... You can tell me... Alright?", said Shinji as he rubbed her knee slightly, not fully aware of what he was doing..., "Don't worry... No one else has to know, unless you tell them yourself... Please, Asuka... Talk to me..."

Asuka felt a slight tremble starting in her hands. She made a concentrated effort to stop it, but it slowly spread up her arms and headed for her shoulders. All the memories from the past few weeks, good and bad, began to swirl around inside her head.

Unit 03... Shinji... Bleeding from the ears... the hospital... needles... Shinji... breakfast...

The trembling reached her shoulders and began to pick up speed as it started to gradually spread all around her body. Still, she couldn't find the words. She couldn't say it...

The forest... the lake...Shinji... the paddle boat... The sirens...

Shinji...

The promise...

The girl reached her breaking point. The last vestiges of her old self finally gave in and surrendered, and Asuka took full control.

She cried out and flung herself at Shinji, wrapping her arms around his chest as she began bawling uncontrollably. Shinji sat, stunned for a moment at the sudden outburst before he sprung into action, so to speak. He returned the embrace as he gently repositioned himself, slowly crawling around to better accommodate Asuka. She moved with him, unwilling to let go, and settled into his chest as he leaned back against the wall.

Reaching up with his right hand, Shinji began to softly stroke the crying girls' hair, not entirely sure why he was doing it, only knowing that it felt...

Right...

"It's okay, Asuka... Let it out... Don't hold back...", he whispered quietly as he tightened his grip on the girl ever so slightly.

They stayed in this position for what felt like hours, until Asuka's tear ducts were completely spent. Her sobs slowly quieted down and the distance between them slowly grew. She gave one more good sniffle and lifted her head from Shinji's chest, wiping her eyes as she did. She looked up and saw that Shinji was still smiling.

"Feel better?", he asked quietly, slowly reaching up to wipe at Asuka's cheeks as he spoke.

"Yes, thank you", she replied quietly while offering a small smile, "Shinji, I.. I'm so..."

Shinji raised his finger and cut her off.

"No no. No need to apologize", he said, "You've done nothing wrong."

"Yeah but... Shinji, your shirt. I mean..."

Shinji looked down to the rather large wet spot on his NERV t-shirt where the girl had buried her face and grinned.

"What? This?", he asked as he pulled on the fabric, "This is nothing. There are dozens more just like this one I can pull from. They had a surplus, and they all happened to be my size."

"Well...", Asuka continued, "I still feel bad. I mean, now you've got to wear this soaked shirt until we can get you another one. Plus, it's freezing up here, so there's that as well..."

"Hmm, I'll make do, I suppose..", sad Shinji, chuckling lightly before his expression turned a bit more serious, "Asuka... You still haven't told me what's wrong..."

Asuka looked down for a moment before slowly extricating herself from Shinji's embrace and leaning back against the wall, her head resting on his shoulder. She let out a sigh before speaking up.

"I don't know, Shinji... I really don't...", she said, "I mean, I do... I guess I just don't know how to say it, is all... If that makes any sense..."

Shinji thought for a moment and then nodded his head slightly. He thought back to the lakeside and the trouble he had had with talking to the two girls. Needless to say, he could relate to Asuka's plight.

"I know exactly what you mean, Asuka", he said, "Trust me... It's hard sometimes, finding the right words to say. I guess the best thing to do now would be to just give it some more time. Maybe after you get a little more calmed down, the words will just come to you, ya know?"

"Yeah... Maybe...", she responded, a slight frown appearing on her face.

They sat in silence for a few moments before Shinji spoke.

"Well... They'll probably be looking for us. I guess we better start heading back to th..."

"No", Asuka spoke up, gently pushing herself closer to Shinji, "If it's okay, I'd rather just... Sit here, for a while... If you don't mind..."

"But...", Shinji started to protest, but feeling Asuka press herself against him slightly, he decided against continuing, "Okay Asuka... We'll stay here for a bit longer..."

The only reply he received was a satisfied grunt. He chuckled to himself and settled his head back against the wall. He stared at the ceiling far above as he let his mind wander, a small grin on his face.

One hour later.

Asuka and Shinji made their way down the hallway leading to the Simulation Plug control room, Misato and Rei keeping pace. All four were quiet, but the general mood was considerably more jovial than the last time the four of them had been together.

Shinji and Asuka had stayed there for almost 30 minutes before Rei and Misato had found them. The two women had waited for quite a while before setting out to find the other two pilots. It hadn't taken them long, though, to figure out where Asuka would have gone.

They had found the two Children laying comfortably against each other, dozing. Misato almost didn't want to wake them up. After all the two of them had gone through since they first met, she was glad that they were finally starting to warm up to each other.

After waiting for a few minutes, the Major reached down and gently shook the two awake. Asuka snapped her head up first, a small line of drool running from her mouth to Shinji's shirt where it had mingled with her tear stain from earlier.

Misato giggled as the girl became aware of this and quickly wiped it away with her sleeve. The sudden movement had woken Shinji who was now looking around and trying to get his surroundings. He caught site of Rei and Misato and blinked a few times before standing up. He offered his hand to Asuka and helped her up.

"Well well...", said Misato playfully, "Didn't you two look comfortable..."

"Yeah yeah...", Asuka retorted as she blinked the sleep out of her eyes.

"Hey, how long were we gone?", Shinji asked as he stretched his arms out behind him.

"Roughly an hour, Ikari-kun", Rei responded, "Major Katsuragi and I waited for about 30 minutes before we started looking for you."

"Why, though? Why'd you wait, I mean?", Asuka asked, now fully awake.

"Well... I figured you two would like some alone time...", Misato answered, the teasing in her voice being quite obvious, "So, I told Rei to hold on and just give you two plenty of time to, well, sort things out. If it weren't for me, Rei would have been on your tail the second Shinji ran after you."

The two pilots looked to the blue-haired girl, quizzical looks on their faces. She noticed them and blushed slightly.

"Well, I wanted to make sure the two of you were going to be fine, but Misato told me that perhaps you two needed to be alone together so you could te...", Rei began before Misato cleared her throat loudly, stopping the girl mid-sentence, "Ohh... Maybe I've said too much..."

Shinji and Asuka looked at each other and were about to inquire as to what, exactly Rei was going to say, when Misato's phone began to ring loudly. She fished the device out of her jacket pocket and flipped it open.

"Hello? Yes... I found them. Yes, they're alright. No, they.. Yes... I hear you. No, I'm not taking this lightly. Yes, but.. Okay. See you in a few."

She flipped shut the phone and deposited it back into her pocket. She shook her head and sighed.

"That was Ritsuko. She wants you three back in the Simulations 20 minutes ago, so we had better hurry back."

At that, the four had started back for the control room, the door of which they were now coming upon. Rei and Misato ran their hands through the scanner and walked in, but when Shinji attempted to do so, Asuka pulled him back.

"What the hell...", he began to protest, but stopped as he saw the look on Asuka's face, "Asuka.. What's wrong?"

She stood in silence for a moment, her hands wringing together, before speaking.

"Shinji? You remember what I said back there? About not knowing how to say what's on my mind?", she asked quietly, looking at the ground as she spoke.

"Of course, Asuka. Why?"

She took a step towards the boy, her head still facing down. Shinji involuntarily stiffened up and gulped audibly.

"Well..."

She took another step forward and, pushing herself up on her tiptoes, placed a feather soft kiss on the stunned boys' lips.

"Maybe I don't need to say anything...", she whispered softly as the door behind Shinji hissed open and Misato stepped out.

"Hey, what's the deal, huh?", she asked, mildly annoyed, "You two out here bein' all lovey-dovey or something?"

Shinji found himself lost for words. He gulped again as Asuka spoke up for the two of them, instantly switching into Old-Asuka mode.

"Oh, be quiet, Misato!", she barked as she moved past Shinji and into the lab, her hand brushing slightly against his as she did so, "Like that would ever happen!"

Shinji stood, still frozen, when Misato said his name, causing him to jump slightly.

"Easy boy...", she said playfully, "Come on, Shinji, we've got some more tests to run."

O..okay, Misato", he spoke up, finally broken of his paralysis. He turned and followed Misato into the lab as a large smile forced its way onto his face.

Later that day.

The three pilots made their way out of the testing facilities and headed for the elevator that would take them to the parking deck where Misato was currently waiting for them.

"Hey, wait up for a minute, you guys!", said Asuka as she turned and started running back the way they just came, "I think I forgot something back in the lab. I'll be right back!"

"Okay, Asuka.. Just hurry. Misato said she was hungry...", Shinji called after her.

Asuka barely heard him as she turned the corner and slowed down. She soon came to the now-empty laboratory and scanned herself in. The lights had been turned off, but she didn't need them. She knew exactly what she was looking for.

She made her way across the room and came to the door leading into the changing rooms. She walked in and headed for Shinji's side. There, laying draped over a chair was the item in question.

That baka... Just throwing his clothes anywhere..., she thought to herself happily.

She grabbed the t-shirt and stuffed it into her bag before running back to Shinji and Rei.

"Did you find what you were looking for, Asuka?", Rei asked as the doors slid shut on the elevator.

"What? Oh, yeah, I didn't forget anything after all.", she lied, grinning to herself.

The rest of the night passed by without much commotion at the Katsuragi residence. No other mention was made of the kiss, and, to their mutual credit, neither party acted any different than usual.

After she had closed the door to her room, Asuka quickly slipped off her NERV sweat shirt and pants and pulled on the stolen t-shirt.

Shinji's t-shirt...

She stood there, taking in the smell of it...

HIS smell...

She stood for a few more moments before finally lying down. She barely needed a blanket, the shirt was so big on her. Nevertheless, she pulled her blanket up to her chin and nestled herself in.

She was out almost instantly. It was a good, deep sleep, the kind of which she hadn't had in several weeks, and was full of dreams... Good dreams. Dreams about...

Shinji..., Asuka mumbled happily as she lay there, smiling broadly.

Well... There it is. Chapter 11. I know there is a lot of WAFF and other fluffy stuff in here, but, It's not my story anymore. It truly is its own creature now.

Having said that, the next chapter will take place at school, and perhaps, Zeruel will make his debut...

Who knows... Oh wait, that's right... I do. :)

Until next time, stay cheesy. ;)~