By the round of applause that continues to drift from the auditorium, down the long corridors and into the room backstage, Erin felt confident that her message got across to the hundreds of people who came out to listen. Being back in Chicago has always given her a buzz feeling; it was home, it was the place she was born and raised. And she appreciated this university, for bringing her in as a guest speaker and giving her an opportunity to not only advocate but to come back, even if it was for a few days.
Erin is at the refreshments table backstage, pouring a glass of water to relax her dry throat as Jay leads his brother, bandmates and Burgess down the hall. She has no idea he's here. He never told her he was even thinking about attending. And she honestly didn't want to ask, after the two events he attended with her back in D.C. she wanted to give him a break. Jay raised his arms and allowed himself to be patted down, "Is Erin in there?" He nods towards the closed door.
"Yeah," Atwater nods, signaling for Jay to step forward.
The only reason they were even allowed to step backstage is because security, Erin's guards, and everyone who has access to television, internet, newspapers and magazines know about her relationship with the lead singer of District 21. Jay crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the closed door as he watched secret service search every layer of his friends. Kim passed the search next, "Did you let her know we were coming?"
Jay shakes his head, "She doesn't even know I'm coming."
"Oh gosh," Burgess inhaled a shaky breath, "She doesn't like surprises."
"How do you even know that?" Adam chuckled, pulling his wife into his arms.
"I've seen interviews Adam," Kim states matter of fact, as if that was obvious, "And one comes to mind when I think of her and surprises. She hates them. Oh gosh, she hates them."
"Relax babe," his lips brush over her forehead and his hand palms her face, "Relax."
A breath she hadn't realize she was holding was released, "That's easy for you to say. You're not about to meet the person you look up to the most."
"You're older than her," Jay remarked.
"…by one year! And who cares about that anyway, there's no age requirement."
Mouse had just finished being searched, "I get what you're saying, Kim. My palms have been sweating and my heart has been racing ever since Jay came up with this idea."
"You two are ridiculous," Rixton stepped up next to be searched, "She's just a girl."
"She's not just a girl," was asserted in unison from not only Jay, but Mouse, Kim, Will, Ruzek and even a few of the secret servicemen.
"I'm going to need you to open your arms and spread your legs," Roman orders.
"Are you serious right now?" He doesn't take Roman's orders; instead he crosses his arms defiantly and leans against the wall, "That's a bit excessive. I'm not a threat. I'm not doing that."
"It wasn't a suggestion," Atwater asserted, moving towards him as if intent on physically moving him away, "We have a job to do and if you're not going to follow orders then I will happily escort you off the premises."
"That's won't be needed," Will steps forward to do damage control; his hand comes to rest upon Kenny's shoulder and the look that he gives him speaks for itself, "He'll comply."
Rixton is the last one left to be checked. With a heavy sigh he steps forward, spreads his legs and opens his arms, "This is unnecessary."
"She's the daughter of the president," Ruzek reminded.
"Still unnecessary…"
Erin filled her glass up a second time. It's settling the hunger in her stomach. Normally, the venue provides food for the guest speaker but this one didn't. She came on an empty stomach expecting there to be food. Sorensen had a stick of gum that she chewed until it was time for her speech and now that her speech is over, it seemed the gum had only tricked her mind and teased her stomach. The growls had only gotten louder and water was starting to not be enough.
With one hand resting over her stomach and the other covering her cup, she needed the dean of the university to hurry up back here so she can leave and find some form of sustenance. This wasn't her first time public speaking; she knew it would be considered rude to just leave without saying goodbye, but it had to be considered just as rude to leave a guest alone, waiting and hungry. Her stomach growled for the umpteenth time, this time twice as loud as the last, "Don't tell me they're starving you."
She recognized that voice, "That's what it's feeling like…" The sound of Erin's voice brought the entire room to a halt, silencing everyone's thoughts and voice as each person inside whipped around to see who had spoken.
Erin sets her empty glass down, flattens out her light pink, pencil skirt. Her white blouse is tucked inside and she immediately steps back into her white heels, "Well isn't this a surprise," she turns and smiles at him, overlooking the other people in the room as she approaches, "Fair warning for the future though, I'm not too fond of surprises."
A muffled, "I told you so…" fills the room.
"Hi," Erin said when she stood in front of Jay, taking a hold of his hand in front of all of his friends, "I am glad that you came though." She could see all of his emotions, every ounce of feeling she had for him was being reflected back towards her.
"Hi," he grinned.
Jay was entirely too attractive for his own good. He wore dark wash jeans, a black button up and a leather jacket; this is a look that continues to make Erin swoon. She moved in closer, it's obvious what her intentions are, "I'm going to kiss you now and we can catch up afterwards."
Jay nodded, calling up to his friends over his shoulder, "Guys!"
It's Ruzek who responds, "What?"
"Mind looking elsewhere," he doesn't check to see if they listen. He just assumes.
And without wasting another moment, his hand cups the side of her face as the two lean in towards each other. He brushes their lips together in a lingering closed mouth kiss that lasts entirely too short for his liking because she's well aware of the company in the room. Even though they're watching, they're only a few feet away. He sighs disappointedly when she pulls away, "maybe later," she runs her thumb across his bottom lip, wiping away a smudge of lipstick.
"I'm going to hold you to that."
Erin looked passed Jay curiously, seeing the back of his friends and brother. She was about to meet the people who matter the most to him. This isn't serious since they've been dating less than a week; this is probably more coincidental than anything but the fact remains, she's about to meet the people who know him best. When her eyes fell back to Jay, she was smiling, "Jay?"
In a split second, his lips were on hers again and whatever question she was about to ask is lost in translation. Instead, she gives in and moves her lips against his, her hands coming to wrap around him, pulling him as close to her as physically possible. She forgets they're not alone. She forgets about her reputation. She forgets that any second now the dean of the university will be walking in. All she knows is that it's her and Jay, just them together.
"Sorry babe," he draws away first this time, "I kind of got carried away."
Erin shook her head, smiling, "You don't see me complaining," she made her way around him to finally approach his friends whose backs remained facing her, "Hi everyone."
Silence. Her greeting is met with total silence.
Jay speaks up for her, breaking the intense silence that had settled over the room, "Guys," he sounds amused; he enjoyed the stunned silence his friends were in as they slowly, and somewhat nervously, turned around. He leaves her side in order to approach his friends, "Let me introduce you. Erin this is Kenny," she moves forward, "Kenny meet Erin."
"Hi," Erin extends her hand.
And Rixton stares at it, "Hey." He makes no move to shake it, choosing instead to walk around her and head over to pour himself a glass of water.
"Really man?" It's Jay that speaks up, pushing Erin's hand down from its extended position.
Rixton just shrugs, grabbing an empty glass to fill, "What?"
"You're just going to disrespect my girlfriend in front of me."
"I didn't want to touch her," he brings the glass to his lips for a small sip, "wouldn't want her guards to think I pose a threat or something."
"Am I missing something?" Erin whispered, glancing over her shoulder to gauge her boyfriend's expression, "and by the look on your face, I'm definitely missing something."
"It's not important. Rixton is just bitter," Jay brushes it off, "Sorry," he apologizes on his bandmate's behalf.
"It's fine, Jay. Just introduce me to everyone else." She's always the bigger person. Reputation has to be maintained.
Halstead's hand comes to rest against her lower back as he resumes the introductions, "This is Ruxek," his drummer eagerly shakes her hand, yanking her arm up and down and up and down, "Alright dude, I would prefer it if you didn't tear my girlfriend's arm out of its socket."
"Sorry," Adam quickly lets it go.
"It's quite alright."
"You've kind of met Will already," Jay waves his hand towards his manager.
His brother is scratching the back of his neck bashfully, "Hi Ms. Voight; it's nice to see you again." Will chooses against extending his hand for a handshake; instead he continually scratches the back of his head, timidly avoiding eye contact.
"Likewise and call me Erin, Ms. Voight is my mother."
Jay anticipated this moment the most. It was Mouse and Burgess left –her two biggest fans and supporters. As his brother goes to grab Rixton, pull him off into the corner and scold him, he turns Erin towards his bass player and their wardrobe consultant. He nudges her side, encouraging her to step forward, smiling as both Mouse and Burgess stare, mouths wide-open in catatonic silence, "You're the…you're the um, the um first daughter." Mouse was the first to recover from the shock but Jay had honestly never seen him so nervous.
"Nice to meet you Mouse," she extends her hand out towards him.
"And you know who I am?"
"Yeah, I've been listening to you guys' music."
Mouse's mouth falls open, "You listen to our music. Erin Voight listens to our music."
"And last but not least, this is Kimberly Burgess, she keeps me looking good," Jay piped up the second he saw Kim growing restless and impatient.
"I guess I should thank you for that," Erin teased, eyeing Jay flirtatiously before turning back to extend her hand towards the woman, "It can't be easy to do all of that by yourself."
Kim remained frozen; she doesn't even notice the hand extended in front of her until Ruzek takes a hold of his wife's hand and directs it towards Erin's palm. The action snaps her out of whatever trance she had fell in, "You're…you're…you're Erin Voight."
"…yeah, well at least that's what they tell me. Hi," they briefly shake hands.
"I just want to say that you're amazing."
Erin's grin widens, "Thank you. Did you two enjoy the speech?" She opens the conversation back up to include Mouse, knowing from past discussion with Jay that he was just as big a fan of her as Kim is, "I always find myself nervous in the beginning until I get in the groove of things."
Jay did his best to mask his joy. He's watching three of his favorite people communicate with one another, even though Erin was doing most of the talking. Kim and Mouse stood staring at her as if they have yet to come to terms with actually meeting her.
"Erin," Atwater poked his head into the room, "the dean is ready to see you now. He figured you both could do some photo ops before everyone leaves."
"Excuse me," Erin maneuvered through them, "He didn't mention anything about photo ops when he invited me to speak."
"I guess it was a last minute change of plans," Roman chimes in.
Sorensen pokes his head in, "Want us to tell him no?"
"No," she chuckles, "You're my bodyguards not my personal assistant. I'll suck it up and take the pictures. I just need five minutes and we can head on out."
The door shuts behind them. All of her guards out of the room, leaving her in the presence of District 21 and two of their staff members.
"When was the last time you ate?" Jay stepped forward before she could apologize for her upcoming departure.
"…last night," she responds without much thought, "Usually these events provide food for their guest speakers, but I guess this time it was out of the budget."
His shoulders dropped at her answer, "Join us for lunch."
"Yeah, join us," Mouse finally finds his voice, eagerly stepping forward to chime in.
"I don't want to intrude."
Burgess brushes off the modest comment, "You're not intruding. We wouldn't have offered if we didn't want you to come. I don't even think you're capable of intruding."
"You guys act like she hung the moon and the stars," Rixton retorts from somewhere over in the corner, drinking another glass of water to nurse the slight hangover from last night.
His comment goes ignored as Jay speaks back up, "Come on babe, you're only in town for a few days and eating is kind of a necessity."
"I shouldn't be long," it's her way of agreeing; she turns to leave, but Jay caught her hand and pulled her back into him, kissing her deeply before having to let go, "I'll meet you back in here."
Jay is forced to let her go, to watch her straighten her hair and leave out of the room. He had been with her for the last couple of days and soon they were both going to be faced with separation. He had performances. She had work. It was still new in their relationship. And while he really liked her, he feared what the separation would do to their relationship, what it would do to him, especially when other women, fans included threw themselves at him. He could do this.
Burgess nudges his side and he glances down at her, "I like this new you."
This new him. He stuffs his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket as he considers it. Yeah, he could definitely do this.
-x-
Someone –no one can remember who- chose a restaurant a little outside of Chicago. If it was out of the city, the chances of paparazzi finding them were lower. Erin's guards ordered food to-go and are camped out in the rented truck, casing the place for any suspicious behavior. Will, Kim, Erin and the band are seated in a booth; three people on each side and a chair pulled up at the front for the seventh person. Erin is boxed in against the wall, Jay in the middle and Mouse on the end. Kim sits across from her, also boxed in against the wall with Ruzek beside her and Will on the end. Rixton is sitting in the added chair.
The sunglasses on Erin's face obscure her appearance; the band members don't really care about where they're spotted. They embrace it since technically it's all a part of the job. Even as they sit, food ordered, and patiently waiting for their drinks to arrive, they sign autographs from the brave fans that worked up enough nerve to approach them.
Erin sits comfortably, tucked into the corner and looking down at her phone every time someone approaches her table. Jay had kept his hand on her leg for almost the entire time, stealing kisses from her regardless of his friends' presence or the people capturing photos. He could barely keep his hands off of her and she wasn't complaining so he didn't find it in himself to stop.
So much for being inconspicuous.
Their drinks are brought to the table and when the waitress lets her name slip, she forgoes the sunglasses and tosses them into her purse. It was useless. Everyone knew who she was. She had accepted her hot chocolate with a grateful smile and brought the mug up to her lips to take a cautious sip, "Yummy." She grabbed the small bowl of marshmallows she ordered on the side.
"I didn't vote for your father," Rixton's words fill the table with tension and discomfort.
Erin dropped a few marshmallows inside of her hot chocolate, "I figured."
"He just seemed shady and suspicious," Rixton felt the need to elaborate, "He probably broke a lot of laws in his life. I couldn't trust him. He's probably a liar."
"Aren't all politicians?" Erin kept her rebuttal light but the growing need to defend her father started to settle in.
"All politicians don't run for the office of the president," he retorted, finishing off his glass of soda, "all politicians' daughters aren't currently dating one of my closest friends."
"Look, I know you aren't too fond of me-"
"That's putting it lightly," he interrupted.
"…but you don't know me," she finished her earlier remark.
"I know women like you."
"Is that so?"
"Alright that's enough," Jay avowed, waving for Mouse to exit the booth, "Kenny, can I speak to you for a minute? Actually, can we have a brief band meeting really quick?" His friend shrugs and rises from his seat; Will and his other bandmates rise too. He watches them walk over towards the jukebox, Will searching his pocket for coins to pass the time by searching for music to play. Jay hesitates in his seat, hand still on her lap and he glances from his band to Erin, back and forth at least two or three times, "I'm sorry."
"You have absolutely nothing to apologize for."
He shrugs, "Doesn't mean I'm not sorry. I didn't invite you out with us just for you to have to defend your dad. I don't know what's gotten into Rixton; he's never acted like that before."
"You've never been in a committed relationship like this before," Kim chimed in.
"I'll be back," he leaned forward, brushing his lips over Erin's before drawing away.
Erin doesn't respond. She nods and watches him walk away. Her hands cup around her mug of hot chocolate and she brings it up to her lips to take a larger gulp than before. In her peripheral, she can see them; it's too loud in the diner for her to hear but based off the body language, none of them are happy with Rixton, especially Jay.
"Jay is really…really into you Erin."
She draws her attention away from the band and across her seat towards Burgess, "Is that so?"
It's obvious she's playing it cool. Her outside demeanor is relaxed but inside she's totally freaking out.
"I have eyes," Kim reminded her as if that was the obvious answer, "You two are really great together. He's changed…for the better. And you might not notice, but when you're not looking or paying attention, he stares at you like you're the only person in the room."
Erin rolls her eyes, "No he doesn't."
"He looks at you like you hung the freaking stars," Burgess sets down her cup of coffee and straightens her posture, all hints of amusement gone from her face, "I'm serious Erin. I've known him for a very long time, I've seen him with women, I've seen him a long time ago attempt a relationship and it's much different than it is now. You two have known each other for a month, have gone on a few dates that weren't serious but have only been officially dating for less than a week and the look he gives you…it's hard to explain."
Erin quirks her eye, "Jay told you all of that? He's told you about the month we've been hanging out and the change in our relationship?"
"Not exactly," the nervousness from earlier today comes back to Kim as she responds, "I get all my entail from social media."
"You shouldn't believe everything you read."
Kim glances down and runs her finger over the rim of her cup. She's blushing and the tint to her cheeks causes Erin to laugh. She's honestly never had this affect on people, at least not that she's noticed. Burgess was avoiding eye contact, finding her thumb tracing the mug more calming and distracting than meeting her eyes. She swallowed hard, looking up to find Erin staring at her, waiting patiently to hear what she had to say next, "You're uh, you're right, but when you're a big fan of someone, you find any means to stay updated on their life."
"And I'm not faulting you for that, I'm just saying unless it comes from my mouth or Jay's for that matter just believe it with caution."
With her hands wrapped around her warm mug of coffee, she stares down into the cup, watching the ripples of black coffee move throughout the mug with every small shake she gives it. It's still hard for her to believe she actually met the first daughter, she's having lunch with her and right now she's having a conversation, just the two of them. Kim looks back up and takes in Erin's calm demeanor; her eyes open and concerned as she takes her in, "Are you alright, Kim?"
"Do you like him?" Burgess doesn't directly answer her question.
"What do you mean?"
"Jay," she clarifies, "Do you like him?"
"Of course, I wouldn't be sitting here willingly getting insulted by his bandmate if I didn't."
That's true.
"Good," Burgess releases a sigh of relief, when she realizes how her last comment may have sounded, "Not you getting insulted, I mean, good that you like him," she clarifies once again, "We were kind of giving up on Jay ever finding someone he liked enough to date. And when Will expressed that he needed an image and reputation change, I thought it was going to be a waste of time telling him that, but then he met you."
Erin's posture straightens, "When?"
"Pardon?"
Her shoulders are tight, "When did Will tell Jay that he needed to change his reputation?"
"It was after the coffee incident." Kim isn't picking up on what Erin is thinking.
"Was it before we started hanging out?"
"Yes," And suddenly, Burgess realized her mistake and quickly jumped up to amend it, "but that's not why he's with you. I swear that's not why. Jay would never do something like that."
"Why not? It works for his bad boy reputation."
"Yeah, that's true, but he likes you a lot," Kim glances over to see Jay nodding along to whatever her husband is saying, but his eyes are on them, questioning, sending off a message to Kim to make sure everything is okay, "Please tell me you believe me. Please tell me that I did not ruin this. I don't think he would ever forgive me."
"I believe you and you didn't ruin anything. I knew Jay was seeking to change his reputation but I just didn't know how much it lined up with him meeting me."
"That was purely coincidental."
Erin brings her mug of hot chocolate up to her lips to take the smallest sip imaginable, "Can I ask you a question, Kim?"
"You can ask me anything."
"You always go on tour with them?" Erin nodded her head towards the band.
"Yes,"
Her question was fruitless now, "…then never mind."
"No, tell me."
Kim actually slides out of the booth and walks around to slide in beside Erin. She doesn't know why, but she just does it. And by the look on Erin's face, she's just as surprised by Kim's behavior as the woman in question is. Erin is closed off; everyone isn't privy into the thoughts and feelings of Erin Voight and she preferred it that way. Burgess was sitting entirely too close, their shoulders were practically touching and if Erin didn't know how much Kim Burgess meant to her boyfriend, she would have told her to move, to back away and give her a little breathing room. Instead, she ignored the closeness and responded to Kim's persistence, "You won't be able to answer my question. You and Adam are married and since you go on tour with them, you've never attempted a long distance relationship."
"Yes I have," Kim eagerly nods.
"You did? But, I thought…"
Burgess interrupted with a rapid shake of her head, brunette strands flying from shoulder to shoulder, "My sister got a divorce and was assaulted shortly after that. I stayed off the tour for a few months to be with her, help her with my niece and just be of support."
"And how was that? Relationship wise?"
"It was easy at first, but the longer we stayed away, the more difficult it became," that eagerness, the upbeat attitude and Kim's cheerfulness started dwindling away, "Insecurities in our relationship started to appear. There were rumors that we were divorcing since I wasn't seen on tour and then women started throwing themselves at Adam. It was a mess. Other than the jealousy, the lack of intimacy, and the sometimes technological failure we had while video chatting, it wasn't that hard, mainly because he was busy with the band and I was busy with my sister. I didn't have much time to reflect on how much I missed my husband."
"So, he never sought comfort elsewhere?"
"I was gone for five months and I trust Adam with every fiber of my being."
"That never answered my question." It's the lawyer in Erin.
"I don't think you want the answer to that question."
"Great," that was her sarcastic response, "My relationship will end just as fast as it had begun."
"No, it's not. Jay likes you," Kim retorted, finding it in herself to rest her hand over Erin's intertwined fingers.
"Yeah, but Ruzek loves you and he still did it."
"It was a rough patch in our marriage."
"That's not an excuse."
"You're right but it was years ago and I forgave him."
"I don't think I would forgive that easily. I don't think I'm capable of forgiving that easily."
"Jay hasn't done anything that needs forgiving."
With that reminder, Erin realizes that they're debating for nothing. She slides her hands from beneath Kim's and goes back to grasping her lukewarm mug of hot chocolate. She bows her head, chin to chest as she releases a loud and drawn out sigh, "You're right. It's just with his reputation; it's kind of hard to not doubt him."
"I know but if it's any consolation, I'll be on the tour and I'll be looking out for him."
"You're going to spy on my boyfriend?"
Kim chuckles as she slides back out of the booth, "…not in those words exactly. I'll just be the friend I always am and remind him about who is waiting for him in D.C."
A genuine smile falls upon her features as she watches Kim slide back into her original spot in the booth. She may have come on a little hard but now that Erin thinks about it, she can never have too many friends. Friend being the operative word since it'll never amount to anything more; best friend wasn't even an option. That smile remains on her face, small but obviously clear, "Thank you." It comes out in the ghost of a whisper. It's low but Kim hears it. And she gives her an equally small smile in return.
This bonding moment is interrupted soon enough by the loud laughter of Will and the band rejoining them. She wasn't expecting their return so soon but when she notices the waitress maneuvering through the building crowd holding a large tray with an assortment of plates, it all makes sense. They're back because the food is done.
Erin is quick to straighten her posture and adjust her facial expression. And while no one else notices, she isn't surprised to see Jay watching. He looks between her and Burgess smiling, knowing that while he was immersed in a conversation at the jukebox, they were in one as well. He wouldn't prod even though he was tempted to. He was just happy that Erin was getting along with at least one person he considered family. He slid back into the booth as his plate is sat down in front of him, "Thank you."
"So uh, Erin," she looks over to see Rixton steal a fry off of Mouse's plate, "I want to apologize to you, I guess."
Her brows furrow, "You guess?"
"Yeah," he sits up straight, flashing her one of his signature grins, "I'm sorry for being an asshole. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings."
The grin on his face contradicted the apology coming out of his mouth. Erin's dealt with worse though; she's sat in rooms with men who casually insult her to her face and play innocent the second she calls them out on it. If she could handle old men looking down at her and judging her then she could handle whatever Rixton tries to throw her way.
"Seriously man," Will scolded, kicking Kenny's shin from under the table, "You could have at least made it sound genuine."
"Thank you for the apology," Erin responds in just the same tone he had delivered the apology.
Rixton shakes his head and chuckles before digging into his hot sub; fingers greasy and mouth wide open with each bite he takes. No home training. Erin rolls her eyes and recalling every manner she could think of, she delicately lifts her chicken wrap and takes a ladylike bite, earning a small laugh from Jay who had watched her the entire time.
"If I know you as well as I think I do, you want to shove that entire thing into your mouth," he teases –and that's the truth, "You haven't eaten all day. Go ahead, none of us will judge."
She continues to take the smallest bites, "I know you guys won't, but I can't say the same for the hoard of people watching and filming on their cameras."
"Come on my little foodie," he throws an arm around her shoulders, "Gobble that down, but if you're afraid…I get it."
Erin is tucked under his arm, "Is that a challenge?" Her question is posed without looking up at him. She's staring down at her meal, eyeing the chicken wrap and the side of fries with a menacing look. She doesn't wait to hear the answer to her question; she doesn't need it, that was obviously a challenge. And using her delicate hands, she lifts her wrap up and takes the largest bite her mouth could muster. It was absolutely delicious.
"There's my favorite foodie," he laughs, removing his arm from around her shoulder in order to start eating his own food.
Conversation fell light and Rixton wasn't a bother the remainder of lunch. Erin had learned so much about the band from a simple observation. She saw that Mouse appeared to be more of a brother to Jay than his own biological one. Ruzek was completely in love with Burgess, just by the small touches, the sweet gestures and the occasional looks he sends her way. That slip in their marriage had been a thing of the past and from the looks on Kim's face, she doesn't regret forgiving him. Will had been on the phone, either responding to texts or emails, the entire time, only looking up when someone asked him a direct question.
Eventually talk shifted and the conversation broke into more private talk. Burgess and Ruzek were in their own world, Mouse was debating with Rixton over some incident that happened before they left Louisiana, Will was still on the phone and Jay was now watching her eat the remainder of her fries. Her plate now empty the second he swipes up her last fry, "Hey!" she shoves his shoulder, "I was planning on eating that."
"You snooze, you lose."
"That so does not apply to right now," she lifted her refilled mug of hot chocolate and took a small sip, "Don't tell me you're going to swipe my drink now too."
"I'll just make you your own batch of fries."
The mug remains at her lips and only one of her brows rise, stretching as high as it can up her forehead, "Promises, promises."
"Come back to my place."
She carefully sets the smoldering hot chocolate back down and turns in his hold to face him; his brows are furrowed, taking in her reaction. He brushes his thumb along the corner of her mouth to wipe away the hint of whipped cream while simultaneously buying her time to come up with a reply, "To sleep with you?"
"That too, but I was thinking more along the lines of hanging out, spending some time together."
"I get to see your place," she whispers, smiling as he nods along, "I'll get to see your baby pics."
"You got to get to know me first," he remarked.
"Alright, what time should I come over?"
He shrugs, playing indifference, "I was thinking you could just come right after lunch."
"I have a conference call for work and my laptop is back in my hotel room," she asserts, mindlessly drawing shapes and figures into his pants leg, "but if you leave me your address, I'll drop by afterwards. It'll probably be some time around eight tonight."
"It's a little after one."
"After the conference call, I'm going to run by Annie's apartment. I promised Travis I would stop by at some point during my trip. And I want to stop by to see Kelly's new office and check in on how being the mayor of this great city is treating him. Today is a good time as any because I have a feeling that you're going to distract me for the rest of my trip."
He smiles. He definitely plans to keep her distracted for the rest of her trip. He tilts his head to press a kiss against her lips, ignoring the flashing of cameras, the public eyes, the bands' nosey gaze and every other disturbance around them as he deepens the kiss. Eventually they'll all find something else more interesting than their relationship. But, Jay didn't care. Erin may have, but as she kisses her boyfriend, she realizes one thing; Erin may be helping Jay ease his bad boy tendencies but he was definitely helping her in return. He was helping her relax, to not care what the public thinks and do what she wants, not what others want her to do.
-x-
Jay feels his socks slide along the hardwood floor as he races to the front door. She had been knocking for at least a few minutes and the music in his penthouse had muffled the sound of her beating against his door. After transferring the fries from the oven tray to a basket, he tossed it onto the counter before scurrying towards the door, slipping when his socks couldn't find friction against the ground only for the door and the knob to block and steady his fall. He caught himself.
And he opened the door seconds later to find Erin and two of her guards: Roman and Atwater.
Both of the guards let themselves in, leaving him and Erin standing beneath the threshold of his front door. Erin stepped in next, wheeling in her overnight bag –the one he text her earlier to bring- before moving out of the way so he could close the door.
"Finding parking here is next to impossible," she flushed the unopened bottle of wine against his chest, "I brought this for tonight," his eyes weren't on her no matter how hard he tried to pay attention; instead his eyes followed her guards and she noticed, "Don't worry, they're not staying. They're just canvasing your place. Dawson and Sorensen would have come in too but like I said, finding parking here is impossible so they're circling the neighborhood."
Jay nods, slowly backing away from her, "I'll go put this on ice."
It takes him longer than she would have guessed. By the time he returns her guards are finished, checking each room, examining the locks on his balcony door and windows and contacting the security at the front of the building, reminding them for the umpteenth time to be vigilant since the first daughter will be staying in the building overnight. Erin gives them both a hug, promising to contact them in the morning to let them know of her plans for the day and whether or not she needed to be picked up before opening the door and watching them leave. Seconds after their departure, she shuts and locks it, resting her forehead against it as she sighed, "It feels like I'm five and getting dropped off at my first sleepover. I'm embarrassed."
His arms circle around her waist from behind, "Don't be."
"I bet you never had to go through this with your previous girlfriends," she turned around in his arms, leaning back against the door as her hands wrapped around his shoulder muscles.
"I can't remember the last time I actually had a girlfriend."
That much was the truth. She remembered him telling her that; it was one of the things they had in common. Neither could remember the last time they had a serious relationship.
Erin pushes herself off the door and gives his lips a chaste kiss, "…so, what do you have planned for us?" Her lips brush against his mouth with each syllable.
"I was thinking I'll give you a tour of my place."
One brow rises, "Trying to one up me?
"Impossible," he chuckles, offering her his hand to which she accepts, "I don't think my one bedroom penthouse is capable of one upping your six bedroom high-rise."
From what she sees as he leads her to his kitchen, it appears to be the stereotypical home of a bachelor. His kitchen is what she expected. For a guy that can cook, his kitchen appears to be underwhelming. It's black –so, so black- and it looks cleaner than her own unused kitchen. Pots and pans hang above her head seeming brand new.
"…as promised," he lifts up the basket and hands it over to her.
She chuckles, "You took one of my fries and I get a whole basket of them in return."
"They're not all for you," he grabs a few and tosses them into his mouth as he departed from the kitchen. Erin stands in the center, holding the red basket, chuckling.
Jay leads her to his living room; it's combined with all of the other amenities a bachelor would need. And while everything that makes this room his space, it's the windows that draw her in. The window stretches so high, she has to squint just to see where it ended. It was tall in length and wide in width. And she thought her living room window was a sight to see. It draws Erin in and she peers out into the city below. It looks so far away yet so close. The lights sparkle in the night and she gasps in amazement at the view, "You definitely one upped me on this view."
"It's the Chicago skyline," he approaches to grab a few more fries, "It's one of the best sights I've seen. And trust me, as a rock star that travels, that's saying a lot."
After some internal force, Erin turns away from the view. She has all night to take it in. From her spot in the living room, she is unable to see the kitchen. That's one of the differences between their places. His living room is huge though –absolutely massive- in that it not only fits his dark, leather couch, but a custom, fully stocked bar in the corner, a dart board hanging beside it, a foosball table to the opposite side of it, a fish tank flushed against the wall, industrial shelves hanging around his home theater system and a pool table behind the couch. It was the epitome of a bachelor pad, a spot to entertain his friends and woo the ladies.
"When do you have a chance to bike ride?" Erin asks, strolling towards the bike hanging on the farthest wall, the only brick wall in the living room. The recessed lighting in the ceiling above them illuminates the room, bouncing off the dark colored walls to make it appear brighter than what it actually is. Jay follows her, trailing his fingers along the bicycle, "I actually don't," he admits with a heavy sigh, "I have ridden since I moved in and that was years ago."
"We'll have to find the time to go riding."
"You know how to ride a bike?"
She scoffs, "Isn't that like a basic requirement when being a kid? Of course I do."
Jay takes a hold of her hand and leads her on, pointing out the one bathroom that's beside his bedroom before grabbing her overnight bag with his opposite hand and leading her to his bedroom, "This is the last stop on the tour."
This room, his bedroom, was the definition of Jay Halstead. It was what she imagined. Three brownish tan walls and one brick wall creating the borders of his space with a plethora of electric guitars lining the farthest wall. His dresser is near his closet and a television, a few inches smaller than the one in his living room, hangs on the adjacent wall. His bed is in the center, flushed against the wall, facing the television. Sheets are falling off the spread and pillows thrown about on the unmade mattress.
A feeling unrecognizable to her takes over when she sees him drop her bag onto the unmade bed, "When was the last time you changed your sheets?" It sounds judgmental and she struggles to change her tone before clarifying her point, "I know you haven't been home in a while to change them since we started dating."
He reads between the obvious lines, "I don't bring women here if that's what you're suggesting."
"Can't be too careful…" She walks further into his room, carefully lowering herself beside him on the mattress, "I'm not judging you for your past. I'm just…kind of protecting my future." Did that even make sense? Erin doesn't even know what she's saying anymore.
"If they found out where I live, they probably wouldn't leave or would constantly show up. I would prefer it if I kept my personal and professional life as separate as possible."
"Sleeping with women was a part of your professional life?" Her hands fumble on her lap, playing with the thread of fabric hanging out of her pencil skirt.
"They were with me because I was rock star Jay Halstead, not regular, everyday Chicago resident Jay Halstead."
This somewhat soothes her, "Well I feel honored that I get to be a part of both." Since when did she become this ball of insecurities? Since she started dating Jay…that's when.
"You should because besides Burgess and Natalie, I think you're the only other girl I brought up here," he reaches his hand over, covering her shaky palms with his own larger hand.
Halstead stands, pulling her up to her feet as he leads the two of them out of his bedroom. It probably was for the best. Erin knows he's telling the truth, but she also knows of his past. She needs to get it together; it's why she mentally scolds herself, this relationship could work out if only she can practice what she preaches. She says his past doesn't bother her, but maybe she's not being honest with herself. Maybe it does bother her. Maybe the idea that so many women were privy to what she is privy to now; they know how he kisses, what he looks like naked, how he feels and so much more that she wanted for herself and only herself.
"What are you thinking about?" He hands her back her basket of fries. At one point she had sat it down without even realizing it.
"Your place is really clean for a guy in his late twenties." She lies. It's the lawyer in her that makes it sound believable but she couldn't tell him. Maybe if she didn't think about it, it would go away. She would learn to accept his past; it's the one thing that he is incapable of changing.
"Stereotyping me, Ms. Voight," he gives her a wink, dropping his arm from around her shoulders as he follows her towards the view that she finds comfort in, "I'm hardly home and not to mention I have a housekeeper come over and dust the place once every two weeks."
"Please don't call me Ms. Voight. That's my mother." She finishes the remainder of fries before handing him the empty basket.
"The guy keeps my penthouse in tip top shape for a nice price too," Jay disappears for a brief second to take care of the basket, "We all don't have a Camille Voight in our lives to keep our homes dust free and impeccably clean."
"She does not clean my place," Erin defends, "She may grocery shop for me on occasion but she does not clean my apartment. My place rarely gets dirty for her to even do such a thing. And besides, she's been busy trying to find the floor of Justin's place to even worry about if I have a dirty dish in the sink or if there's a grain of salt sitting on my counter." Jay chuckles. And that relieves her. It takes her mind off her earlier worries and focuses it on the here and now.
Here she's with Jay and now he's taking her hand and leading her away from the window. She follows with each gentle pull, "Jay, where are we going?"
"I have one more thing to show you."
"And here I thought the tour was over," her brows furrow as he leads her outside the door of his penthouse and towards the elevator, "Alright, now you have me curious."
Jay says nothing more. He simply grinned and kissed her forehead before pressing the rooftop button in the elevator. A silence filled their presence, surrounding them inside of the overwhelmingly large elevator. Neither chose to speak, instead they chose to stand, facing each other, staring into one another's eyes as the elevator took them up one floor. It's only when the doors opened that Erin pulled away, gasping almost immediately at the sight in front of her.
"Come on," Jay takes her hand and leads her onto the roof; he's walking backwards while holding her wrist and pulling her forward, "Since you enjoyed the view from my living room so much, I have a feeling that you'll enjoy the view from the rooftop."
He led her to the ledge, peering over the row of shrubs as they took in the city below. Erin is speechless, taking in her surroundings. It's as if the entire world is right in front of her, within reach and waiting for her to either touch or memorize every light, building, movement of water and plant as if she'll never be privy to this view again. There was no word that came to mind to even attempt at describing the view before her. All around them were the sounds and the lights of the city; it would seem next to impossible to get any amount of rest with how active the downtown city life is on any given day of the week.
"It's a sight for sore eyes, huh?"
Jay shrugs, turning away from the view to face her, "I've seen better," cupping her cheek with his hand to hint at what exactly he was referring to, "I've seen much better."
She blushed. She actually physically blushed. If not for the night sky, he would have noticed the dark red tint that appeared on her cheeks. This guy had a way with words. It was his superpower and she could actually see how he became a ladies man. It didn't appear to take much.
"Come on," he took both of Erin's hands into his own, squeezing them gently, "There's something else I want to show you."
Erin nods in agreement as he releases her hands. This time he doesn't pull her along. He simply points towards a trail and hints for her to take it. She does. And all along this pathway were bushes and patches of flowers creating privacy around the swimming pool cemented into the roof. The pool was well lit; it practically glowed beneath the moonlight. Erin suddenly stopped walking and turned around to face him, watching him as he started to discard his clothing, "I didn't bring my swimsuit. I don't have one with me."
"It's a good idea that no one is allowed up here after hours."
His feet were now bare and his shirt was thrown onto one of the lawn chairs. His pants shortly followed afterwards and then his boxer briefs. He stood naked and proud, eyeing her wardrobe with an expression that showed he expected her to follow. A smirk fell across her lips as she shook her head and took a step back, "You want to skinny dip in a public pool?"
"It's technically closed; it's after hours," he takes one step towards her.
"So now we're trespassing," she crossed her arms, looking at everything besides him, "we're breaking the law and you're naked."
He takes another step, "Live a little."
"I live enough."
"You can never live enough," he takes another step.
"And skinny dipping with you is living?"
Jay shrugs, "…among other things," and he takes another step forward, only this time she takes a step back, "Come on…say yes," he implored.
"You are a horrible influence."
It comes out as a chuckle as she kicks off her heels. He doesn't move any closer, choosing instead to enjoy the show from the distance. She shimmies out of her skirt and throws the blouse somewhere off to the side. Jay turns away from her. The rest of the show occurs without his prying eyes to watch. Instead, he starts to step into the pool, testing the water to find it just the right temperature. And by the time, he's completely immersed into it, she's naked.
"I can't believe I'm doing this," she whispered to herself, "My parents would kill me."
"Do you always do things to appease your parents?" He swims over towards the stairs of the pool as she starts to lower herself into the water.
"I try to," she admits, "aside from dating you; I try to do things they would approve of. I don't have the best track record when it comes to making decisions and I know that all of what they tell me is for my best interest. I didn't know that at first but after Nadia, I got my head on straight and started to really get serious about my life, what I wanted to do as a career, who I chose to date and who I chose to befriend. I'm taking back some of the control but it'll take time, especially because my decisions don't just affect me."
"That's good to know," he swam up to her. The water reaches just above her breast, lapping against the skin with each movement of the chlorinated water.
Her fingers trail up his arms, going over each droplet of water until they reach his upper arms, "You know," she soon wrapped her arms around his neck, "I think we should avoid talking about my parents while we're both naked and trespassing in a closed pool." He nods.
And suddenly, Jay's hands fall to her waist, pulling her flush up against him, desperately needing and wanting to feel more of her. He pushes her back against the wall of the pool, the water splashing and slapping loudly because of the abrupt movement. His hands roam down to cup her behind and her leg lifts to wrap around his, practically yanking him closer as she opens up to him. Their movements are erratic and rushed but the kiss he lays upon her is the opposite; it contradicts everything his hands and body is doing to her. Her bottom lip is sandwiched between his and he's sucking, pulling, tugging and biting against it as gently as possible. It's soft. It's filled with a rising passion. And as her back repeatedly hits against the pool wall with each thrust, he realizes that he's in deep, both figuratively and literally. Erin Voight, the president's daughter will be the end of him.