AN: Alec and Magnus sitting in a tree... K.I.S.S.I.N.G... and well you know how the rest of the song goes right?

So there's actually no kissing in this chap but after what happenes I'm sure there will be a sufficient amout of kissing later...

Patience my malec fans, patience...

Yeah I know I hate myself too for no Malec kissing but go and enjoy anyway :D

Hiding in plain sight

All characters belong to Cassandra Clare but Izzy's bitchy attitude belongs to me.

Chapter 11.

Alec's point of view

Alec stood outside his sister's bedroom trying to rub his sweaty palms on his jeans. He had stood there for a while now; he heard her phone ring and had to wait for her to finish the phone call.

Alec felt very nervous because he could hear what Izzy was saying… She was talking about him and Magnus. At the point where he heard her say "I don't think you should ask him out…" He had tuned out and blushed far too red for his own health. Why was Izzy saying that? Was Magnus going to ask him out? Why would she tell him not to? Oh yeah, coz I haven't told anyone I'm gay. But Magnus must know, it was too obvious right? I should tell Izzy right now and get over it. Yeah, I'm gonna do it right now, just tell her.

Alec placed his hand against the door and took a shaky breath as he tried to knock on the door. He couldn't do it, it was just a simple movement of his wrist, but he couldn't do it. Something was telling him to stop. He wanted to tell Izzy, he even thought she might understand, I mean she was Izzy; she had to understand didn't she? His breathing was becoming more rapid, the more he thought about telling Izzy everything the more he felt as if someone was gripping him from the neck and choking him. He couldn't breathe, it was impossible. He couldn't tell her, it was not possible. Her demeanor towards him would change; she wouldn't think of him in the same way, she couldn't. She wouldn't think of him as "Alec my big brother" she would think "Alec my gay brother"

It would change everything; it was inevitable and couldn't be stopped. Wasn't this exactly why Alec had kept his secret and not admitted it to himself in the first place.

He was yanked out of his thoughts as he heard quiet steps coming towards him. He saw the door open in front of him in a quick flash revealing Izzy in her pink teddy bear pajamas.

She stopped on her tracks as she saw Alec just standing there like some sort of zombie.

"Heeeyyy Alec" She said with a smile saying 'what the hell is wrong with you hun?'

"Huh?" Was all he managed to mumble. She looked so innocent, like she wasn't plotting something behind his back; her brown eyes were bright and her hair on a messy ponytail. Her smile was welcoming and convincing, she looked like an angel. If only Alec hadn't known better.

"Was there something you wanted?" She asked in a curious voice as she cocked her head to the side.

"No" Alec said whilst shaking his head "Well yeah actually…"

"Great!" Izzy cut him off "I was just about to come and ask you if you wanted to join me and Magnus and…Simon for a movie night at Maggie's place. He has a lot of movies so I thought we could all hang out and get to know each other better"

Alec was just about to nod before he remembered what he had heard Izzy say on the phone "Hey was that Magnus you were talking to?"

"Were you listening in on my conversation?" Izzy snapped surprised.

"Well when I heard you were talking about me my ears were just burning" Alec said spitting out his words "You are conspiring something and I'm not liking it"

"What" Izzy said with a flabbergasted look on her face "Me?" She said slapping her hand dramatically on her chest "Conspiring behind your back, how dare you...-"

"Just cut it out Izzy" Alec croaked "I heard you telling him not to ask me out!" He was surprised that he was yelling but he was feeling so much angrier than he thought he would feel.

Izzy just stood there staring at him with a very distant look in her eyes. She frowned a bit "I didn't know you wanted him to ask you out…" She whispered.

"What! No. I…I don't" Alec said "But I don't want you making decisions for me"

"Well how am I supposed to know anything anymore anyway" Izzy snapped and turned on her heels just to stumble back into her room and slam the door in Alec's face.

No way was she just ending this conversation like this. Alec grabbed the doorknob and opened it with a tough yank "What the hell was that about?"

He saw his little sister sitting on the edge of her bed with her arms crossed over her chest. She looked like she used to when she was younger and didn't get her way with things.

"Well what do you think it was about" Izzy said sniffing.

Was she crying, no way was she crying? "Iz stop acting like that and just tell me what's wrong" Alec sighed "I'm the one who's supposed to be angry at you right now for talking about me behind my back but you're making me feel guilty. How is that fair?"

Izzy got up with her hands in tight fists tightly tucked on her sides "I don't know what to do to help you" She sniffed again and wiped her eyes with her hand "You won't tell me anything anymore and it makes me feel like an outsider. This isn't the way we used to be."

Alec felt taken aback, Izzy knew, she had to know, this was bad. "Izzy there's nothing to tell"

That wasn't a good move "Oh really Alec, so there's nothing, absolutely nothing you want to tell me? Nothing significant I should know? Huh?"

Alec didn't know what to say at all. He just looked at her with dread in his eyes. This was the moment he had been fearing all his life, all the time hoping and wishing no one would ever guess what he was, wishing he wouldn't have to confront his family.

And Izzy was already mad, how was he supposed to say anything "I-I… I haven't" Alec felt a lump form in his throat preventing him from saying anything without stuttering "I-I d-don't k-know wh-what you're um…"

Good job Alec, real smooth. This is going great, all you have to do now to make things worse is punch her in the gut and run away like a cry baby. His thoughts were quickly turning into self loathing mush that he couldn't figure out.

Izzy was still looking at him with an upset look on her picture perfect face although now there seemed to be a softer tone to her brown eyes. "Alec are you alright?" She took a step towards him and touched his arms lightly. He flinched from the sudden contact.

"I…" His mouth was open but no words would come out "I'm s-sorry" he mumbled out. It wasn't enough though, he knew that. He had lied to her…well not really lied but he hadn't told the truth either.

"Sorry for what?" Izzy said taking his hand not loosing eye contact.

"I- I d-didn't tell y-you"

He was afraid he would start crying soon. He needed to get out right now. He needed an escape route and fast. He couldn't stand the way she was looking at him, like it was pity in her brown eyes that was swallowing all his self confidence.

"Alec…" She whispered "You don't need to be sorry" She looked a bit guilty now. "I'm sorry for yelling at you… It's alright I promise" She said gripping his hand tighter.

"But I was going to tell you… I- I really was" Alec mumbled "I- I just thought that...-"

"Thought what?" Izzy said with a worried tone to her voice.

"Thought that you wouldn't' care for me anymore" Alec spat out as soon as he could before he changed his mind. "I'm not normal Izzy and you know how people will think about me when they find out"

"What the hell are you talking about Alec" Izzy said clearing her throat "Why would you say something like that?"
"Because it's true" He said whilst holding back tears. The situation was so absurd and distant, his blood seemed to be boiling, he wasn't feeling so good and wanted to sit down so he did. He just collapsed on the floor without a warning. Izzy quickly followed him down "Alec, it's alright" She tried to calm him down.

"You're gay" She said looking him straight into the eyes. Alec tried to look down but she placed her hands on the sides of his face and forced him to look up "Alec? Isn't that what you wanted to tell me? That you're gay?" She looked serious but at the same time she was nodding in a very calming way.

Alec couldn't say anything because by the time he tried to his tears were spilling out without nothing stopping them, he felt so disconnected to his body right now. "I-I…" He kept trying to start but never ended up finishing the sentence. He was taking shallow breaths and completely losing control over his body. He knew he was acting ridiculously but couldn't really help it. He felt so overwhelmed and at the other hand so free and relieved. Someone else knew he wasn't alone anymore; Izzy was right there and holding him very tightly.

"It's ok Alec" She said and wrapped her arms around him "I don't care if you like girls or boys or even sea monkeys for god's sake"

Alec was registering her words very slowly "What?" He mumbled between his sniffs and tears.

"Yeah you heard me right, I never cared. Honestly I've known for a while Alec, I've just been waiting for you to tell me. I just didn't understand why you didn't want to tell me. Don't you trust me?" She said with a very wary voice.

Alec looked up to her with a very pathetic look in his blue eyes, his hair was tousled and all over the place he was pretty sure he looked like shit "Of course I trust you. I just didn't know how you would feel… I-I didn't want you to be embarrassed of me"

"Oh Alec, I could never be embarrassed of you" She shook her head and gave him a lovely smile "You are always my big brother, you're always the same guy who used to take the blame for me when I did something incredibly stupid, you're always the guy I can count on to be there for me, you always take care of me and make sure I don't get scarred and burned" She said with a very emotion filled voice. She was leaning against Alec now and he was beginning to feel a bit better. Maybe it was the shock wearing of or maybe it was the tiredness taking over his body but he actually felt…like a huge weight was taken off his shoulders. He sat there on Izzy's bedroom floor with her cradled to his side surrounded by splotches of used and non used clothing lying around.

"I understand why you feel like that" Izzy suddenly said "Like you're not normal"

Alec arched his eyebrows "What do you mean?"

Izzy shook her shoulders "I mean I don't know if it's because of what I'm thinking of but it's just that I remember…all those things dad used to say about gay people and non catholic people and all kind of people who didn't fit into his perfect little mold of seeing things"

Alec shuddered as he remembered those days back in New York when his father would read the paper and go on a rant about something like that, something that made Alec feel like nothing, like a piece of trash someone threw out of a car window and no one ever looked at again.

"But you know I bet mom doesn't think of things like that" Izzy said while holding Alec's still shaking hand. "If you just told her-"

"No. I'm not telling mom, she… She wouldn't understand" Alec said quickly before Izzy could keep talking. He shook his head as to emphasize his point.

"I just think if she knew she wouldn't worry so much about you" Izzy said thoughtfully "She seemed to be really cool with Magnus too" She said with an encouraging voice.

"I just…I'm not ready…"

"Okay Alec" Izzy said which was a surprise to him, his sister never gave up on things like that or never really gave up on anything.

Izzy was quiet for a very long time and Alec just listened to her breathe. It had been a while since the two of them had really had a real conversation, heart to heart. Izzy had been busy and Alec had been acting like an angst ridden teenager.

"What are you thinking of? It's not like you to be that quiet" Alec asked.

"I'm just thinking about if I should call Maggie and tell him that movie night is called off"

"What, and let Simon down?" Alec asked with an actual smile playing on his lips.

Izzy let out a small sarcastic laugh "I haven't actually told him about movie night yet. We just needed a plus one so Magnus thought of him"

"Why did you need a plus one?" Alec asked his curiosity getting the better of him.

Izzy was awfully quiet. "Tell me Iz, please?"

"Well… I don't know if you know but Magnus is kind of interested in you, although you'd have to be blind not to notice"

Alec nodded blushing again "I might have noticed a little something…"

"Anyways, he wanted to ask you out but I thought that you might freak out if he did so… I figured we should have a group of friends over to watch a movie or something and then I'd distract Simon with I don't know like maybe Star trek or…-"

"With dungeons and dragons"

"What?" Izzy said".

"Dungeons and dragons, Simon likes dungeons and dragons" Alec clarified.

"Oh ok, well anyway, I thought I'd get us out of there and then you'd be there alone with Maggie, but I guess that's out of the question now…"

"What a master plan" Alec said swallowing loudly.

"I know" Izzy sighed "I did tell him though that if I had to spend the evening with Simon he'd have to give me a big piece of your wedding cake when you two elope to Canada"

Alec suddenly turned bright red "What! Elope, who the hell said anything about Canada?"

"Calm down…" Izzy said "I'm sure you can always go to some other country too… Maybe like Sweden or whatever, I'll check it out online"

Alec stared at her with pure disbelief flooding from his eyes.

Finally Izzy started laughing so brightly and without a trace of seriousness in her voice. Alec joined her and felt all the rest of his worries shed away. He was lying on the floor with Izzy and they were both laughing so hard that their lungs were aching. "I can't believe you thought I was serious!" Izzy laughed out loud.

"You can be very convincing" Alec said still recovering from his burst of laughter.

"So you don't want me to call off the movie night?" Izzy said with a shaky voice.

"And what, miss you spend an evening with Simon?" Alec laughed "Watching you two interact is way too funny to pass"

"But you won't be seeing us" Izzy pointed out "You'll be with Maggie looking at something completely else"

"Iz, what are you suggesting" Alec said with a wary voice, he wasn't sure where his sister was going with this.

Izzy quickly sat up and stared down at his bother "Alec can I ask you something personal?"

"Isn't that kind of the topic of the night?" Alec said with a slightly reserved smile on his lips.

"I was just wondering if you've ever you know…Kissed anyone."

Alec tried not to laugh "Well there was this one girl in fifth class but that didn't really count since I think she just kissed me to make some other guy jealous. And… I thought it was pretty icky"

"That sounds awkward" Izzy stated.

Alec let out a laugh "Believe me it was"

"So you've never kissed anyone for real?" She clarified.

Alec shook his head "Nope"

Izzy was smiling at him with a creepy look on her face "Well I think if you spend some time with Maggie that little kiss issue will be fixed"

"Nah, I wouldn't really know how to kiss him anyway… not that I don't want to but it's just that I wouldn't know when… or how" Alec was babbling but just the thought of kissing Magnus was beginning to deteriorate his brain.

"Believe me, I think Maggie knows how to handle that, he has that look about him that makes me believe he has had his fair share of kisses"

Izzy smiled at Alec and he smiled right back at her "Thank you" Alec whispered at her.

"For what"

"For being you and understanding" Alec said and squeezed her hand.

"No problem, actually I have been dying for you to come to me with your relationship issues, I just love meddling with other people's lives"

AN: Izzy was being so nice huh? How did you think Alec did with the whole "coming out" thing? Let me know your thoughts on this chapter. Please? Pretty please? With a cherry on top? Reviews?

Ok I'm done now - Love ALWAYS - Alexandra