haha, I just realized I start almost every chapter note with 'so'

In Soviet Russia, Fic enjoys You! (?)

#42. Hate

It's hard to hate someone when they're so damn nice.

Suki, she's perfect. She's polite and sweet, probably beautiful, from the things I hear Sokka whisper to her. She's a photographer, toting that stupidly heavy and bulky 'vintage' camera around, trying to seem artsty. She tries to play a ukelele, passing it off as music. If anyone knows what real music is, it's a blind person. What she plays isn't music. She flits around in clicking heels or overly-decorated flats with skirts that resemble circus tents. She plays sports, too, like volleyball and track.

We've got about three things in common: we're both girls, we're both on track, and Sokka.

I'm his best friend (as far as best friends that are girls when he has a girlfriend go), even more so than Aang. We do track, which would've been a wonderful time if Suki didn't insist on being in it, too.

See, the worst part about hating her is that she doesn't know it. She loves everyone and is loved by everyone. She thinks were friends, saying hi to me when we pass by or hugging me, wrapping her arms around me and squeezing me against her expensive hipster perfumed body. He probably loves that smell.

I hate myself for hating someone who is impossible to hate and makes the person I love happy.

I hate the fact that Sokka loves someone I can't stand.

We sit together on the bus until she comes on, when I give up my seat. He asks if I'm sure and I say its no problem. At lunch, they practically sit on each others laps, laughing and socializing like they're the perfect couple. That's always been their little persona: perfect couple. That couple that's rich but would just be happy with each others company and looks good (I'm guessing) together. They agree, give other couples adivce. The whole shebang.

We're polar opposites. She's polite and graceful, poetic and girly. I'm obnoxious and clumsy (although i have my ninja-reflex moments), hilariously rude and tough. And what really annoys me is the fact she's thought of as cool for visiting popular places like Omashu or Ba Sing Se, when I've spent summers there. But, of couse, if I mentioned that little fact, people would think I was one-uping Suki.

And it makes me sick to my stomach when they cuddle up and whisper things to each other they think no one else can hear. And they're right. No one else can hear them. Well, no one else but me.

Sure, I've been asked out once or twice but I've always turned them away as I sit in a studyhall monitered by an uncaring substitute next to Sokka. He'd drop the pencil he was trying to balance on his upper lip as a paper plane zoomed in the empty space between us I desperatley want to close, asking why I turned that particular boy down. I'd shrug and say I just didn't feel that way about him. Then I'd make a rude comment about the kid's personality or habits, both of us laughing.

Sometimes he'd call me to inform me on how the latest date went when I could really care less. I'd just nod my head with 'uh-huh's and 'nice's. Then I'd make up some lame excuse for me to hang up and he'd happily accept it, the phone clicking as he hangs up. I'd sigh and go back to whatever I was doing, filled with a new attitude leaning towards annoyance or hopelessness. It's like getting reminded you'll probably never do half the things you wanted to in life, like visiting somewhere obscure and never actually being what you wanted to be.

I hate that.

But, from the looks of things, I'm going to have to keep on hating it, with a small glint of hope that that hate with disappear.

Along with Suki.

Wa wa waaaa. Another sad one.

I love me some angst ^_^

This one is kind of a true story. Like I'm Toph and Sokka and Suki are two other people I know. Huzzah for inspiration!

Peace, L.