Guys I am so happy I decided to split this part into two chapters because it wouldn't have been possible to explore everything I wanted otherwise. This one is my favorite so far, it has a lot of unseen scenes and these are my favorite to write. It takes place during the events of 11x14, when Amelia recklessly takes off her gloves during Herman's surgery and Owen flips (I wrote his reaction to it) and also what I imagined happened between 11x14 and 11x15. Here goes!
The Journey – Part Eleven
"Shepherd, what are you doing?!"
Owen had got up and reached for the intercom before he could even notice what he was doing. From the OR, he heard Amelia's distant voice.
"It's so much easier this way…"
But Owen didn't care how easy it was. After over fifteen hours of standing in that OR, going through an incredible exhausting procedure, Amelia Shepherd had finally made it to the near end. All she needed to do was place small radioactive seeds in the inside of Nicole Herman's brain to make sure the chances of tumor recurrence were as close to none as possible. After weeks of closely following up with her plans, Owen knew the procedure steps by heart. The radiation level those seeds contained were considerably high, which demanded special gear to handle them. Even though the dosage was not life threatening, it could still be very harmful. As chief, Owen had to ensure the hospital staff took every precautionin n the book to guarantee their own safety before anyone else's.
His head of neurosurgery taking off her gloves and exposing herself to radiation was a huge liability. It could cause a great deal of damage if she prolonged that exposure, therefore causing a big bureaucratic headache for Owen to solve, not to mention a very likely insurance problem.
But that was not at all Owen's concern.
Instead, he was having a hard time accepting that something harmful could actually happen to Amelia Shepherd.
"You need to put that glove back on right now!" He shouted through the intercom, struggling not to let his emotions cloud his decision-making skills. Owen looked at the clock and saw the minutes ticking. He knew they were in a time frame and Amelia was toying with her luck. "Grey, stop her," He ordered, looking at Meredith who was also inside the OR. "She needs to put that glove back on right now."
Next up, Owen heard Meredith talking about the time they had left but he was hardly paying attention. It wasn't until Amelia finally placed the last seed and backed away from the table that he was finally able to relax, dropping on the chair and sighing heavily.
.
Amelia could not believe it when, after having had dinner and taken a relaxing hot shower, she couldn't gather the energy to go home, choosing instead to crash on a bed in one of the on call rooms.
Her day had been exhausting and the past thirty-six hours, incredibly overwhelming. She'd gone from a back to back day at work with a rollercoaster of emotions only to find out she'd have to start Herman's surgery before planned and without getting any kind of rest.
The sun had set and risen but Amelia had not seen it, spending nearly twenty hours inside an OR. The whole process had been draining, not only physically, but especially mentally. The neurosurgeon had needed every ounce of energy to keep fighting and maintain her cool. At times, Amelia had found setbacks and her mind had played tricks on her, making the surgeon second guess herself. But with the support of co-workers and the memory of the comforting words Owen Hunt had said to her hours before the procedure were enough to keep Amelia standing.
And now, she was rewarded with the best scenario possible.
Herman had made it through surgery; Amelia had been able to take out the entire tumor and she had successfully planted all the radioactive seeds. The patient had then been taken to the neurology ICU, where she would recover from anesthesia and possibly not wake up for hours. All the parts of her plan had been beautifully executed and the minute her head lied on the pillow, Amelia embarked on the serene sleep of one who knew she'd done everything in her power to fix a situation, everything that could possibly be done.
A few hours later, she woke up to the sound of the door cracking opened.
"I'm sorry," she heard a deep male voice that sounded displeased echoing inside the room. "I was looking for you but I had no idea you were resting."
Amelia struggled to open her eyes, adjusting to the darkness. Even though she couldn't see much, she would recognize that voice anywhere. Owen Hunt stood by the door, his hands clenched into his fists. As she regained some of her sight and consciousness, Amelia noticed his jaw was hardened and his eyes were sparkling with fury. The guy was obviously struggling to contain himself.
"Is everything okay?" She pulled out the covers at the same time she sat on the bed, with obvious intention to get up. "Is it Herman, is she-?"
"She is fine," Owen interrupted her as he finally fully walked into the room and closed the door after himself. Amelia saw him reaching for the switch and violently pressing it, turning on the lights. Her eyes were assaulted by the sudden clarity. Next thing she noticed, he had walked over to the corner where her bed was and unceremoniously held out her hands, examining her palms.
"What are you…?"
Her sleepy voice was once again interrupted by his serious tone.
"Don't ever," Owen's voice was dangerously low and Amelia noticed for the first time the contained wrath in his face. "Ever pull a stunt like that again, you hear me?" He hissed, finally looking from her hands to her face.
Amelia felt the intensity of his gaze and swallowed hard. Her body was assaulted by a warm rush of blood and she wasn't sure what that unexpected response was exactly about.
"It's fine," She started, sustaining his look in clear defiance to his intimidation. It was obvious her boss was worried that the radiation from the seeds in the surgery could somehow have hurt her. "It didn't even…"
Owen possessively grabbed her right wrist, carefully inspecting her hand again and Amelia realized that was his way of showing her she was no match for him where physical dominance was concerned. His grip, despite fierce, wasn't too tight so he wasn't hurting her but it definitely didn't allow Amelia to escape should she wish it.
The neurosurgeon didn't notice she held her breath as Owen's free hand touched the palm of the one he was holding. His thumb slowly explored the surface of her skin, examining it, and then slid upwards to her fingers, making Amelia slightly shiver. The contact was at the same time very intimate and incredibly erotic. Amelia never knew that only the touch of a hand could cause all of her senses to suddenly be brought to life and she didn't realize her lips were slightly parted as her breathing got heavier by the second.
"You don't know," He whispered in a dangerously low voice, unable to accept how exponentially angry he was with her. Owen had waited for hours to talk to her, giving the neurosurgeon a chance to rest after the exhausting procedure and also some time for himself to calm down but it clearly hadn't worked. He was still as mad as he'd been in the gallery. "You could have late signs of radiation exposure. You could have-"
"I am fine!" It was Amelia's turn to interrupt him, repeating the words as she forced herself up with full intention to get rid of his touch. His presence was inebriating her logic and that was something she couldn't afford right now.
"Do you have any idea what you could have done?" Owen easily contained her attempt to free herself and as if punishing her, he held her slim wrist above her head, forcing Amelia downward again. She felt his shadow covering her as his face got dangerously closer. "The damage you could have caused?"
"Herman is fine!" Amelia chided, too aware of his proximity. Her heart was racing and it was alarming the way she couldn't control the responses of her body. "She is fine, she will be…"
"Well, damn it, Herman is not the one I am concerned about!" Owen shouted between his teeth, too angry with her to try to act rationally.
Amelia's reply got lost somewhere in the back of her mind. She looked up and noticed Owen's eyes fixated on her, his pupils dilated with anger and desire as they traveled from her gaze to her lips. Automatically, Amelia opened them, silently consenting his seductive invitation.
"Who, then?" She tested him, unable to help it. Amelia wanted to hear him say it. She wanted to see him lose control, the same way he was forcing her to at that moment.
But he ignored her question completely, almost as if reading through her intentions.
"When I tell you to do something," Owen leaned over on the edge of the bed, completely aware that he had long before crossed the line of professionalism. Amelia drove him crazy and he hated himself for allowing her to have so much power over him. "You do it." He commanded irrationally, his face hovering over hers, almost as if testing the woman.
Amelia opened her mouth to automatically say he was not her boss, but she held the words in the last second, realizing how foolish she would sound. Owen was her boss. In the OR, he had every right to demand she played by his rules.
But right now, as she lay on a bed under his shadow, completely vulnerable to his every action, Amelia knew she should feel threatened and intimidated. But somehow, she felt strangely excited, vibrating in the same frequency of his outburst of energy. She spotted the vein pulsating on his neck and knew how hard he was struggling to remain in control.
Guys like Owen weren't very used to being defied. Amelia knew that. The realization only boosted her desire to test his patience and make him lose his mind completely.
"Fine, then… Next time you disagree with one of my choices, I will hand my OR over to you and you can finish the procedure yourself," She declared, doing her best to pester him as she spoke the words, on purpose inputting all the irony in them as she could. "If you think you can do a better job, I mean." She sustained his look and provoked the guy, seeing his pulse racing through the vein that was popping on his neck. "I'd like to see you with that ridiculously large hand trying to place small seeds inside someone's brain…" She smiled mischievously at his angry scowl at her insult. "I know, right?" She went further, knowing he was about to lose control any minute now and she was in for God knew what kind of retaliation. Strangely, even though she was well aware of Owen's physical superiority, Amelia wasn't afraid of him. "It's easier said than done…"
Owen breathed in and out through his nose, desperately trying not to lose his last bit of rationality.
"You are the most irritating, obnoxious, insolent woman I have ever…" His words got lost as, amidst the blinding anger that was consuming Owen, he looked down and saw Amelia smiling at him with what looked like contentment.
She didn't look pretentious or provoking in any way. Instead, her eyes were warm and her smile was surprisingly lazy, almost as if she was satisfied.
His brain twisted in a knot and he brought his face closer to hers, trying to study the woman with more objectiveness. She was testing his every limit and he wasn't sure how much longer he could take it.
Owen was an army guy. He had grown up in a military household and spent a great deal of his life under a chain of command. Where he came from, disobeying clear orders was a serious violation and not at all a considerable possibility. Every day, he walked around the halls of the hospital with the calm confidence of someone who knew that, just like in any army base, his service ran smoothly because it was under a reliable command. There was hierarchy. Order. Discipline. People listened to him. They trusted him. And they obeyed his orders.
But then Amelia Shepherd had walked into his life and disrupted that balance completely. She was so insubordinate, impulsive and took so many risks that Owen felt like more than half of his work related headaches were caused by the brilliant neurosurgeon. Her behavior stood out completely from everyone else's, not only because she was pretty much the only one who dared to defy him so openly, but she also had the annoying habit of almost always being right or making the best choice.
And Owen felt a primitive need to discipline the woman, to subdue her to his command at the same time he desperately wanted to protect her from everything else and preserve that spark of stubborn determination that challenged him so much.
"Wipe that silly smile off your face before I…" Owen heard the words, interrupting himself when he realized he was the one saying them.
"Before you what?" Amelia's smile slowly faded as she made eye contact with him again, realizing his face was only inches away from hers. If she moved one bit, their noses would touch. She could feel his warm breath as his intoxicating scent numbed her senses. Even the muscles on his neck were rigid, showing he wanted the same thing as she did and Amelia realized she was done playing her games. Relaxing under his touch, she made eye contact with him and lost her smile.
Owen noticed how she slightly let her guard down and saw the opportunity there. As badly as he wanted it, he couldn't miss out on a chance to give her that lesson. It took all self-control he had left and more to prevent himself from crushing her lips with his.
"I want to kiss you," He lowered his head and released the grip on her wrist, daring her to break free of him now that she could. While dangerously hovering his face over hers, Owen noticed the moment her eyes closed, as if preparing herself for what was about to come. "I will kiss you." He added, brushing his lips on the smooth skin of her cheek, avoiding her lips on purpose.
Owen knew he had achieved what he wanted when Amelia's hand made its way to his shoulder, silently inviting him in. It took all the effort in the world to do what he planned to do. Owen tried not to think of how she was lying down on a bed, closing her eyes, expecting to be kissed by him. But he needed to prove a point and Amelia needed to learn a lesson.
"I will kiss you, but not right now," Owen added, pulling away gently. Amelia opened her eyes in shock, being brought back to reality by his surprising words and the loss of contact with his lips on her skin.
"What?!" She got up, on purpose using her hands to push his chest from above her.
"Go home and get some rest, Shepherd," Owen's angry voice returned as he got up, too frustrated with himself for having to do that. Sometimes, he hated being the chief. "I'll deal with you later," He informed her with authority, on purpose using the same tone as he would with an impertinent child before leaving the room.
Amelia was left fuming with anger and disbelief at his outrageous attitude. I'll deal with you later. Who the hell did he think he was?, the neurosurgeon wondered, still in shock for the way he had obviously seduced her with full intention to drown her in frustration. To top it off, the guy had left her with a double meaning remark, making Amelia completely unaware of what she should expect.
Why did it have to be so hard?!
Biting off the case of a pillow at the same time she snorted with frustration, Amelia threw herself back on the bed, feeling her back violently colliding with the soft mattress. No one could make her as confused and indecisive as Owen Hunt. He was more stubborn than she thought was humanly possible; more relentless than anyone else she'd met and harder to beat than any opponent she'd had to face.
The more Amelia tried to figure him out, the more she realized he was way too complex and challenging. And unlike Herman's tumor, Owen couldn't be subjugated to carefully constructed plans. No matter how much Amelia tried to decide on how to act around him, he always seemed to find a way to break into her defenses.
And her only option now seemed to be giving up planning completely.
.
Amelia enjoyed the hype after the surgery but it didn't last very long. Not too long after she'd left the on call room and went back to the neurology ICU, a familiar sense of worry started to grow inside of her as soon as she noticed Nicole Herman wasn't waking up like she was supposed to.
Initially, Amelia supposed it had to do with the extended surgery and the possible overlapping effect of a prolonged general anesthesia. But as hours became days and days became a full week, the neurosurgeon went back to feeling like she was walking around in circles.
It became increasingly hard for Amelia to pay attention to anything that wasn't related to the patient. She cancelled her electives surgeries and pushed consults, obsessing with finding out what could have possibly gone wrong to explain why her patient wasn't waking up. Amelia had left the OR after the tumor removal feeling like a hero who'd just won a battle yet now, with the lack of response from Herman, she wondered if all of that had really been worth it.
Nicole Herman might never wake up again and Amelia would be the one to blame for stealing possible weeks from her life with her ambitious surgical plan. No matter how perfectly the execution had been, if the outcome wasn't positive, there wouldn't be much to celebrate.
The neurosurgeon took another sip from her cup of coffee, getting ready to go over the footage of the entire procedure for what felt like the tenth time that week when she was suddenly interrupted.
"Stop. Go home."
Amelia had to use all of her strength to keep it together and not talk back. A lot of colleagues had said the same to her during the past days and she was tired of people not getting it.
"I need to figure this out." She replied evasively, determined to go back to what she was doing and be left alone.
"No, you need to take a break." Owen affirmed with propriety. During the past week, all his head of neurosurgery had done was examine Herman's case, repeatedly studying the surgery performance and analyzing every single detail of the entire thing. He could barely remember the last time he'd seen Amelia anywhere near the house. Ever since their day in the on call room, he'd been desperate to be alone with her again. But Owen's frustration didn't only have to do with the damage she was inflicting on himself, but also with his longing to enjoy her company and attention.
"There is no swelling, no edema. I don't know why she is not awake." Amelia spoke, more to herself than to him.
"It could be any number of reasons," Owen pondered rationally.
"Don't tell me what it could be!" Amelia lost her patience, unfairly taking her annoyance about the entire sitiation out on him. "Don't you think I know every possible thing it could be?" She exploded. Hearing it from Owen had been more triggering because he was one of the few people whose good opinion Amelia actually cared about. She expected him to talk back and reprimand her but after seeing the look of patience and comprehension in his eyes, Amelia felt too embarrassed for her tantrum, turning her head sideways to avoid his gaze. "I'm sorry," She softened her tone and added with sincerity. "I just need…" Her voice trailed off as she struggled to explain.
"I know." Owen affirmed with security. "You need it to be over." He said, hoping to be right.
Amelia once again wondered why he could read her so well.
"I need her to wake up." She explained, offering the only scenario that would give her any sense of accomplishment.
Owen felt a stinging sensation in his heart and mistook her guilt for unmeasured ambition. It was hard to imagine Amelia Shepherd was egocentric enough to obliterate everything else about that experience and focus only on the result. The idea was quickly rejected by the chief, and he left before he could think too much about it.
It took a while longer than expected but on a random weekday, Nicole Herman finally regained consciousness. It was with a sense of relief that Amelia realized pretty much all of her patient's cortex functions were intact, with the single exception of her vision. At first, it really bothered the neurosurgeon but then as she had proper time to digest the information and process it, the patient's sight loss felt like a small price to pay in face of the many years of a healthy life she would have, and all of it thanks to the miraculous surgery Amelia had planned and performed.
.
As she drove home that night, Amelia recapitulated the events of the past month. It had been an insane rollercoaster. Especially lately, when she had focused most of her energy on work.
But now, that incredible surgical challenge was finally over and Amelia could take a break and relax again. It felt amazing to leave the hospital with the sense of who'd just done their duty remarkably well. Amelia loved her job but she could very well need a break to focus more on herself now. The neurosurgeon knew that for the next weeks, she would still have to go through follow ups with the patient and probably a lot of medical press but those were nothing in comparison to what she'd already been through. She couldn't remember the last time she'd calmly had breakfast at home, without a rush, and those simple things were the ones she missed the most.
As she parked her car in the garage, Amelia saw some movement around Owen's trailer. It wasn't dark yet and her brother's house seemed to be empty. Meredith and the kids were probably still at work and day care, and the prospect of being alone after such an amazing victory made Amelia feel strangely sad and lonely.
She got distracted pondering why Owen was home at such an unusual hour. She knew he usually worked late but muffled sounds were coming from his place and Amelia grew curious. Earlier that same day, she had been unfairly rude to him. Telling herself that apologizing to the guy was the reason why she needed to go there, Amelia dropped her work bag on the front porch and made her way across the yard.
To her surprise, the sounds she was listening to weren't coming from a TV or any other equipment. She found her boss outside his trailer, near the lake, where what looked like a punching bag was hanging by a tree branch. Owen stood next to it, mercilessly attacking the object with his closed fists.
Amelia noticed how flushed his face was as he fired blow after blow, apparently unaffected by the collision of his hands against the hard material. She swallowed hard at that display of virility as the simple white T-shirt he was wearing outlined the muscles of his back and the width of his shoulders. A droplet of sweat was running from his forehead, and it touched the ground at the same time the guy turned around and noticed her presence.
"What?" Owen frowned, unable to decipher the estranged expression on her face.
After being caught flagrantly staring at him, Amelia looked away, finally noticing the countless boxes stacked near his deck. It was obvious a moving was going on and she felt her heart beating faster when she considered the most obvious idea.
"Are you…" She studied the place again, unwilling to believe that possibility and anxiously asked. "Are you moving out?"
Owen tried to ignore the look of surprise and expectation on her face as he followed her gaze and noticed what her eyes were fixated upon.
"No, these are not mine," He explained, wondering if it'd just been an impression or if Amelia really had been bothered by the notion. "Two of my friends are getting married and buying a new place. They asked to drop those here until they can take it to their new house."
"Oh," Amelia replied with an unexpected sense of relief. She didn't know what else to say so she simply slid her hands inside her back pockets and watched as her boss resumed punching the sandbag, this time around even more fiercely. "Is that theirs too or have you moved on from throwing rocks at the lake as a stress reliever?"
Owen stopped amidst a hit, but didn't turn around. He took a deep breath, trying to figure what the lighthearted tone on her comment meant but he couldn't. With a heavy sigh of frustration, he finally faced her again.
"It is my friend Leo's," He explained. For some reason, having Amelia figure out so quickly that he was throwing punches because he was stressed made him feel uneasy. "He was in the army with me and he has always been into boxing, so he dropped this stuff here while he doesn't have a place to store them."
Amelia took a couple of steps in his direction. His voice sounded sharp and his body language was very defensive. Was it possible that he was this mad with her? Earlier that day, when Amelia had lashed out at him, she had immediately said she was sorry and he seemed to have understood her frustration and accepted her apologies. Deep down, she knew there were a lot of unresolved matters between them two but Owen had never acted so silently angry with her before.
"Are you okay?" She asked, finding his behavior very strange. She'd seen mad, serious Owen before. But Amelia had never seen him acting so unaffected and indifferent in her presence.
"Never better," He replied harshly, obviously lying.
Owen had just been waiting for Amelia to give him any kind of stupid reason so he could start an argument with her. He was frustrated and the past few weeks had been hard enough to endure withstanding the intense attraction he felt while unable to act on it.
All he wanted was to be with her, but Amelia was focused on something else entirely. For a while, that had been completely understandable. Owen agreed that she'd needed all of her focus and energy to come up with the hardest surgical plan of her career, and of course she should prioritize that above all things at that moment. But then, even after Herman's surgery was over, she had kept immersed in work, obsessing about it despite the fact that there was nothing else she could do to change the patient's status other than wait.
Owen had tried to approach her. He'd offered to talk, but all she seemed to do was to dig her head deeper in the case, studying it and going through the files over and over again. Earlier that day, Owen had had enough of it and confronted her. But before he could even begin to lash out, Amelia had rudely dismissed his attempt to offer some kind of support.
Even though it was hard to admit, her behavior had disappointed Owen a little. Not only because he was physically frustrated, unable to channel the attraction he felt for her, but mostly because he thought Amelia wasn't that kind of person. Unconsciously, he'd come to slowly form an opinion about her and actually like what he'd seen in the woman. Owen had imagined she wasn't one to make her career the center of her life and neglect everything else completely, depending only on her surgical outcomes to feel happy and validated. So to see her so immersed in work, not paying attention to anything else even after the procedure was over had been a big letdown. Owen had assumed she was different. For weeks, he'd watched her actions, heard her words and been in her presence. Everything so far had led him to think Amelia was relatable. But now, for the first time, he'd come to wonder just how accurate his opinion of her really was.
"Are you mad at me?"
Amelia felt an involuntary constriction inside her chest. She felt drained, all her energy was gone and she didn't have the mind for flirtation games, teasing each other or even pretending the feelings she had for Owen weren't there. Her biggest challenge at work was over and she was finally free. Coming home to an empty house had felt lonely enough, but to see the only person she would consider celebrating her big victory with treating her with such cold distance hurt especially hard.
Her question took him completely by surprise and Owen looked up from the ground to her face. The sun was starting to set, casting an orange shadow upon them, making Amelia's large blue eyes look even more revealing than he could remember.
Something in her sheepish tone alarmed him. Owen had to be fair: Amelia was many things. She was impulsive, intense, energetic and even ambitious.
But she was also genuine.
The transparency in her eyes was obvious and the way she would look at him with so much vulnerability reminded Owen of a child who felt like she had just disappointed someone. There was no way he could look into those eyes and think for a second that Amelia could be lying about who she was, or pretending to be something she was not.
"I'm not," Owen replied with a much gentler voice. He withheld a chuckle, wondering how could he have been so stupid. "What brings you here? Is everything okay?" He asked, realizing for the first time that she had willingly showed up at his doorstep.
The realization pleased him very much. He knew Nicole Herman had finally regained consciousness that day. Instead of staying late at work to register every detail of it, Amelia had come home very early. And apparently, the first thing she'd done once there was to look for him.
"It's just that…" Amelia felt a lump in her throat. She didn't want to confess everything to him but at the same time, she didn't have it in her anymore to keep pretending or to keep analyzing every little scenario for her every action. Amelia was tired. All she wanted was to lower her guard but in order to do that, she needed to be with someone who she trusted enough not to take advantage of that. "I just wanted to see if… I mean, if you're not busy, if you…"
Her voice trailed off and she looked up to find Owen's encouraging yes.
"Yes?" He offered her a warm smile in exchange for her words.
"The whole thing with Herman is over," She explained. "It's finally over. And it worked out," She chuckled, biting her lower lip embarrassingly. "She is alive and I didn't rob from her a couple of months of her life… and now she can go on to save more babies…" It was clear in Amelia's voice she was relieved. The neurosurgeon had no idea how much those words meant to Owen, because even though he'd read it in her eyes, she was giving him verbal confirmation that her commitment to the after surgery outcome had nothing to do with her ego and pride. "I mean, now she is blind, she can't operate anymore, of course, but at least she can teach? Or, or… guide, instruct?" She went on rambling. "I don't know… Oh, she can share her experience, write books, inspire others…" Amelia added excitedly. "Anyway, it doesn't matter." She smiled gracefully. "What matters is that it's over… And I feel like I should celebrate it," Amelia finally added, seeing him nod his head in agreement. "You know, it feels like a big win…" She said with modesty. "And I was wondering if you…if I… I was thinking that I'd like for us to celebrate it together."
Owen narrowed his eyes in appreciation. He was really not expecting that.
"If you're up for it, of course," Amelia nervously added, putting a loose lock of hair behind her ear.
"Of course." He gave up thinking and having an opinion about her completely. That could be left for later. Now, all he wanted was to enjoy her company. "So what do you have in mind?"
Amelia shrugged. She hadn't really thought it through.
"I don't know," The neurosurgeon answered with honesty. "I didn't really plan anything. I just don't want to be alone, I guess." She admitted.
Owen pondered for a second, with a relaxed look in his eyes.
"Well… Do you like hot dogs?" He asked, obviously with an idea in mind.
"I love hot dogs," Amelia replied with a smile.
"Good," He rejoiced at the sight of her dimples and walked over to his trailer deck, silently inviting her to join him. "I'll start the grill and then have a quick shower, okay? Give me ten minutes."
Amelia nodded affirmatively and spent the following minutes studying everything around her. A couple of blue coolers were empty by the deck, but she'd seen Owen getting beers from them a couple of times. She particularly liked the bottle shaped lamps hanging from the ceiling, realizing they gave the place a personal touch. The wooden table and set of chairs looked very rustic, and fit perfectly with that outdoorsy scenario and the personality of the man for whose company she eagerly waited.
Exactly ten minutes later, he came back from inside the trailer bringing the hot dogs and fresh buns. By then, the grill was already hot enough. As Owen got busy preparing their dinner, Amelia spent her time observing him.
His hair was still wet from the shower and he smelled like fresh soap. Even though he'd put a sweater on because the weather was getting cooler now the sun had fully set, his strong arms were still visible, much to Amelia's appreciation.
"You make that seem very easy," Amelia casually commented, watching him handle the grill.
"It isn't exactly brain surgery," Owen replied with a playful smile, indirectly paying her a compliment.
Amelia chuckled and handed him an open bun, enjoying that comfortable intimacy much more than she could predict. Owen asked if she'd been to a lot of barbecues growing up in New York and even though Amelia nearly always avoided talking about her childhood, with him it didn't feel so awkward.
The conversation shifted from her childhood to his childhood; then to trips, some of the cases Owen had seen while in the army and Amelia's training during her fellowship. Owen talked about his time at Harvard, his favorite professors, most of which Amelia had later been taught by, and they discovered they both used to go to the same small pizza place in Boston while in med school.
At some point during the evening, Owen realized she was nearly freezing and before Amelia could realize what he was doing, her boss went inside and came back with a fluffy sweatshirt that nearly engulfed her entire frame.
"It fits perfectly," Owen joked, gently pulling up the zipper while looking into her eyes with an affectionate smile. There was nearly one foot of excessive fabric on each sleeve and the hem of the sweatshirt made it almost past her knees.
They were standing in front of each other by the deck, next to the grill. Amelia felt the soft touch of his old army training uniform against her skin and wrapped her arms around herself, breathing in to feel his familiar soapy scent on the piece of clothing, loving the combination of senses.
"I think I am going to steal this hoodie from you," Amelia confessed, genuinely in love with it.
"You can keep it," Owen smiled in return. Somehow, seeing her in his clothes made him feel proud and touched by the obvious reality that Amelia was very comfortable around him. Besides, she looked adorably cute in the oversized sweater.
"Aww, thank you," Amelia replied playfully, trying to mock him. "First you gave me a job, then tonight you fed me, entertained me…" She joked. "Now you even clothed me."
The silence that followed added to the brightness in his eyes let Amelia know that perhaps she'd said a little too much. It was obvious Owen was thinking that he would much rather be taking off her clothes instead of dressing her, and Amelia had to admit she also did.
"Owen…" Her voice was nearly a whisper and he felt a wave of desire running through his entire body after hearing her pronouncing his name like that. "What are we doing?" Amelia asked without any trace of malice, really interested in the answer. "I mean…" She hesitated, seeing the intensity of his gaze on her face. "What is this?"
He took one step closer and gently placed his hands on each side of her waist.
"I think you and I both know what this is…" Owen whispered back, completely seduced by her. He had to use all his strength not to pull her into his chest and wrap both arms around her.
"Last week you said… You said you wanted to kiss me." Amelia reminded him, eagerly looking for an answer in his eyes.
Owen knew she was talking about the day he'd woken her up in the on call room and confronted her about her impulsive decision to remove her protection gloves during Herman's surgery.
"I meant it," He replied, unable to break eye contact with her. "I wanted to."
"But you didn't." She reminded him, suddenly pulling apart from his touch.
Owen held his breath, frustrated for the loss of contact with her.
"Amelia, you know I…"
"I know," She interrupted him, smiling lazily into his eyes. Amelia wanted very much to be in his arms and kiss him back with the same desire she knew he felt for her. But if she allowed that to happen, she knew in her heart that the night wouldn't end there. And they couldn't go there. Not yet. Had it been any other guy, Amelia would probably already be sneaking out from his bed at that hour. But with Owen, for some reason she knew the sex would mean much more than just physical release. "We don't need to define anything right now." She smiled, showing him there were no hard feelings. "Let's just figure out what this is instead of hurrying to put a label on it."
Now that her big surgery was over, Amelia would finally have the time to focus on her personal life. She didn't want to rush into things. On the contrary, she wanted to enjoy every step of the way. And with Owen, that felt especially important.
"Okay," Owen read her meaning in her eyes and smiled, silently agreeing with her conditions. "Let me at least walk you up to the house?" He offered, noticing she had gotten ready to leave. "It's kind of late." He added, as if that somehow justified Amelia needing his protection.
"Sure," Amelia replied with newfound joy and started walking beside him. "There are no werewolves here, you know?" She teased his offer to walk her home, playfully nudging his shoulder with hers on the way. "No vampires either… I won't get bitten."
"Let's not take any chances," He contained a smile, knowing that his proposal to accompany her had been a mere excuse to spend more time in her presence.
Much to Owen's dismay, they reached the house soon after and as Amelia turned around to say bye, he felt the soft touch of her fingers on his.
"Good night," Amelia rubbed his hand affectionately. "I had a great time tonight. Thank you for dinner." She smiled with honesty. "It was delicious."
"Anytime." Owen felt sad to be leaving and gently let her go.
He had already climbed down the steps of the porch and was on his way back to the trailer when his voice interrupted her thoughts.
"Amelia?"
She looked up one last time before closing the door, noticing he had turned around. After seeing he had her attention, Owen smiled widely and confessed.
"I still want to kiss you."
Amelia chuckled, feeling a delicious sensation on her stomach. Everything about that evening had been wonderful.
"I know." She smiled back, her eyes sparkling with mirth and playfulness.
And just as she thought he was done, Amelia heard Owen adding from a distance, unknowingly widening the smile on her lips as he walked home with his eyes still on her.
"I will kiss you." He repeated the words he'd said to her in the on call room, causing the same sensations he once had.
But the only difference was that, this time, Amelia had no doubt that he would.
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