A/N: You guys and your reviews make me positively beam! And blush! And hysterically giggle! I love them all! here, I whipped up some evil and poorly timed comedic relief for all the sexual tension between the last chapter and the next chapter... ohhh yes next chappy shall be fun ;) stay tuned folks, judging from all the great feedback at my feeble attempts at sexual tension, i just might pop my "smut cherry" (as it was coined by one of my lovely followers) with this fic ;)
here's a super-manly encounter between two best friends...
Chapter 11 – Oh Sweet Anticipation
"Oh. My. God! You looked positively sexed! Tell me everything right now!"
Who else would it be but Renji Abarai?
Ichigo didn't even offer him his customary scowl as he let his best friend into his home. Ichigo just smiled calmly and floated up to his room, feeling like he was on cloud nine.
"Dude yer creepin' me out, the fuck happened to you?" Renji inspected Ichigo up close, hmm'ing and ha'ing at what could possibly be wrong.
He suddenly pointed straight between Ichigo's eyes – startling the poor guy, "It's there! It's yer face! Yer face is wrong!"
Ichigo felt a vein tick, "Fuck you!" He growled and smacked the hand away, "Can't ya let me be fuckin' happy for two damn minutes? Asshole."
Renji whistled, "Subject's testier than usual, Doctor." He nodded appreciatively to himself, like he had all the damn answers.
"Tsk, idiot." Ichigo rolled his eyes but broke into a sheepish grin nonetheless.
"Subject's showing all the usual symptoms of a classic bug-bite, Doctor. Better get the disinfectant."
Ichigo raised an eyebrow, "The fuck? Bug-bite? What are you on about now?"
Renji twirled away dramatically and grabbed Ichigo's spray bottle for his desk plant and pretended to cock it like a gun, "The LOVE BUG!" He cried before wildly triggering his 'gun' in Ichigo's face – much to Ichigo's displeasure.
"FOR FU- RENJI YOU MORON!" He made a grab for the bottle but Renji was prepared for that and jumped back, laughing manically. "GIVE IT BACK!"
But Renji kept chanting 'love-bug' and 'disinfect' while dancing just out of reach of Ichigo's grasp. 'Why am I friends with this asshole?'
Eventually Ichigo just gave up and flopped back onto his bed, arms behind his head. He looked up at the ceiling… and thought about Grimmjow – or more specifically – Grimmjow's lips.
He got a spritz in the face before Renji's mug entered his vision, "Yo!"
"Renji! What the hell!"
"So?" he prompted, conveniently forgetting about his stupid dancing a minute ago.
Ichigo sweat-dropped, 'Exams really got to him, eh?' He cleared his throat, "What?"
"Don't play dumb with me! I want to know what happened with you and coffee-boy! You look like how I felt when I was supposed to be studying with Rukia…" He waggled his eyebrows.
Ichigo grinned and said nothing. 'His lips were so soft, and he tasted like espresso and caramel… that must be from a coffee, no one can taste that swee-'
"Oi! Don't just daydream about it!" Renji whined, "Tell me~"
Ichigo sighed and sat up, taking in his friend's eager posture: Renji sat cross-legged next to him on the bed, hands in his lap and leaning forward, as if to glean insight faster by being closer.
Ichigo gently pushed his friend back for space and mirrored his pose. "Okay, here's what happened…"
Renji whistled, "The man's got some lines, I'll give him that! You got yourself a Rabbit, Ichi. Congrats!"
Orange brows quirked in irritation, "Do I even want to know what a Rabbit is?"
Renji laughed, "'Course you do! It means you two are gonna go at it like rabbits! He sounds like the type who'll get in your pants every chance you let him."
The images that followed were too much.
Grimmjow completely flushed.
Grimmjow with his pupils dilated.
Grimmjow ripping off his apron…
Ichigo felt himself break out into an instant overheat while his face boiled – he quickly covered it with his hands but Renji saw anyway.
"D'awwww Wittle Ichi's Cyuuuute~" Renji cooed, thoroughly enjoying his revenge for all the shit Ichigo said to him when he spilled about Rukia and him becoming official. Ichigo spent the entire night egging him on and making everything he said sound sexual if you were paying attention.
Once he was done making his best friend squirm, Renji threw his arm around Ichigo's shoulders and gave him a quick and very manly hug, "Soon…" He whispered in Ichigo's ear, pushing some orange locks away from the ear he was addressing, "Soon… you will lose your virginity!" He began cackling loudly.
Ichigo fumed and shoved his friend away harshly, "Dick!" He grumbled and flushed all at the same time.
"Yes exactly!" Renji howled, holding his stomach, "Oh! It hurts! Ahahaha! Oh shit Ichi!"
"You are exactly the kind of person I hate." He growled.
"Love ya too man, love ya too."
"Big brother! Mr. Renji! Dinner!" Yuzu shouted over all the commotion the boys were making.
"Coming!" both called before eyeing each other and breaking out into matching grins.
'He may be an idiot, but he certainly knows how to fix me when I'm down in the dumps or up in the clouds – '
"But I think Ichigo is coming first today!" He called, winking at Ichigo and darting out of the room before he could be smacked by the raised hand.
'Did I mention he'd an idiot? Straight up and nothing more to it. Idiot.'
But he couldn't hold the grin at bay long enough to be mad.
Eight o'clock.
What a scary time of day.
Ichigo paced his room while Renji threw around a stress-ball and kept an eye on his friend in his peripherals.
Ichigo was nervous.
"Should I change?"
"No, Ichi."
He paced another line.
"Should I shave?"
"No, Ichi."
He paced once more.
"Should I at least shower?"
"No, Ichi."
"Why the fuck not?!" he growled.
"Why would you shower, shave and change for this little date when he's gonna look exactly the same as earlier? He's at work Ichi, he's gonna be in his uniform. Wouldn't you feel odd if you did all that when he never got the chance? Ya showered this mornin' anyway, quite being a chick."
"Fine."
He paced some more lines.
"What if I brought him flowers-no!-wait! He prefers chocolate. What if I-"
"No, Ichi."
"WHY THE FUCK NOT?!"
"Shouldn't you be heading out now?" Renji snickered.
Ichigo whipped to face his alarm clock, "SHIT! Why didn't you tell me it was getting so late!" He frantically played with his hair in the mirror.
Renji laughed, dropped the stress-ball and made his way to stand behind Ichigo. He slowly pushed away the hand that was fussing with Ichigo's usual cowlick and patted it back for him. "There," he murmured, voice lower than normal.
Ichigo looked over his shoulder to eye his friend and found Renji wiping away a small tear, "Wh-what's up with you?"
*Sniff* "You… you're" *sniff* gonna go and" *hiccup* "have a wonderful time an'" *sniff sniff* "and lose your virginity and" *hiccup sniff* "I'm just so proud!" And with that Renji started dramatically bawling his eyes out.
"Oh my god Ren! You're insane! Absolutely and completely. I'm leaving." He turned and walked down the stairs, shaking his head and muttering about 'damn redheads.'
But he was smiling nonetheless.
He didn't see Renji staring out the window after him, giggling and texting Rukia, "Well i tried to calm him down best I could. lets cross our fingers n hope this 1 works out!"
"does he kno what u were doing?" she typed back. "like does he suspect u?"
"nope. He thinks im a regular idiot lol I bet he'll tell me"
"i dont kno.. he doesnt seem like the type to share THOSE details."
Renji scoffed, "he better tell me! i wanna kno what two guys do!"
"me too, im actually really curious about it."
"i kno right? i'll reeeally have to bug until he spills tho" Renji sighed, 'He won't be easy to crack this time around…'
"lol anyway get ur butt over here now that ur done with him. I have… needs ;)"
"ur wish is my command, my lady ;)"
"damn straight it is!"
Ichigo stared at the store-front, 'Alright. I can do this, just be cool. Renji is right – in his own way – I shouldn't be so dramatic. This isn't some movie or book, I need to man up if I want Grimmjow… ha yeahh I want him – focus Ichigo! – Right, movie star, famous, sexiest man alive, movie star, famous, sexiest man alive…' He ended his pep-talk with a little mantra to put some swagger in his steps.
"I got this." He smirked, sauntering across the street and knocking on the locked door. He saw Grimmjow jump and look up, checking his watch and smiling widely at the time. He grabbed a key-ring off the counter and made his way over to the door. Ichigo put his hands in his back pockets and waited, trying his best to not make it obvious he was totally checking Grimmjow out.
'This should be interesting.'
A/N: I know this was silly, I just wanted to give poor Ichi some breathing room before the big finale and explore Renji as being that sort of grounding pillar for Ichigo when he gets just a little too... up in the clouds, so to speak.
But of course Renji doesnt always have the most pure intentions for his help... hehe
ANYWHO, tell me if this was dumb and if I should just not include this chappy... it's hard to tell - i havent slept in a long time =P