11. Lena

Lena snuggled into the pillows on her ornate bed and reread the letter from Will for what must have been the fiftieth time.

Dear Lena,

We're so thrilled you're coming to the Isle for our sixteenth birthdays next month. Everyone is really eager to see your whole family, but I'm most excited to see you.

Lena smiled. She was as excited as Will seemed to be about going to the Isle of the Eldunarí for a visit. Her family was getting large now—Lena had five younger siblings, two brothers and three sisters—but the trip would be possible with Tomath and Snowfire to help out. And Ajh of course.

Since the time Tomath and Elva had married five years earlier, Elva had never been able to have a child, though both she and Tomath longed to be parents. Lena hadn't understood much about the situation until more recently, and it was then she learned that there were many opinions regarding Elva's misfortune.

Lena was never one to trust rumors, so she had gone straight to Elva and asked for greater understanding. Elva had explained that she was unsure why her body couldn't maintain a pregnancy. She had conceived many times, but the pregnancy always ended prematurely. Elva thought it might have something to do with the accelerated growth she had inflicted on herself as a baby. More than that however, Elva feared that her body had a deep mental terror of bringing a child into a world so full of pain and sorrow, something Elva was able to experience on such an intimate level when she allowed herself to.

She and Tomath were learning that if she prevented herself from feeling anyone else's suffering, her pregnancies seemed to last longer. But if she used her ability even slightly, her body would immediately begin rejecting the pregnancy. Elva had told Lena that she was working to master her gift even further so she could completely ignore any perceptions of hurt or anguish. She and Tomath had also discussed living somewhere more remote so the temptation would be easier to resist. They hoped these measures would enable her to carry a pregnancy long enough that the baby would have a chance to survive when born.

Since they had no children of their own traveling with them, Tomath, Elva, and Snowfire had room for additional passengers and would be able to help transport Lena's large family. Thorn was obviously strong enough to carry them all, but it was difficult for Lena's parents to keep track of six children on the back of one dragon.

So the two middle children would ride with Tomath and Elva, while the two youngest would stay with their father and mother on Thorn. Ajh and Lena would ride his dragon.

Lena sighed. Ajh had become a Dragon Rider the year before when Snowfire's first egg hatched for him. Ajh had named the dragon Berry, since some of his favorite desserts were made with cream and strawberries. When finished, the delicacies looked remarkably like the dragon's coloring—pale pink with red streaks. Ajh was always thinking about things in terms of food, but Lena wasn't surprised, for that was what Angela had instructed him to master.

The year before Ajh had been chosen was the dwarves' year. That Choosing Ceremony had taken place in Tronjheim under the guardianship of the dwarf Riders. And it was no real surprise to anyone that the dragon chose Keeta, the oldest daughter of Knilf and Greta, just a few months after her thirteenth birthday.

So five of the Dragon Riders' children were now Dragon Riders themselves, all chosen the year they turned thirteen. But not Lena. She had stopped feeling resentful the year she turned fourteen, but when Berry had hatched for Ajh just after her fifteenth birthday, Lena had felt a full resurgence of her jealousy. Was she somehow unworthy? Was that why she hadn't ever been chosen?

Now almost a year later, Lena was back to the comfortable place of being fine with the way things were. Angela continued to visit her in a dream every birthday with the same insistent reminder to sharpen her mind and figure out how to solve difficult problems. Lena assumed that whatever she was being prepared for had nothing to do with being a Dragon Rider.

She continued reading.

I hope you have been doing well there. I'm sorry to hear about how some of the youth in Ilirea feel about us younger Dragon Riders. What if they're right . . . ? I'm only teasing. But we should talk to our parents about how we could change that. Maybe if they had a chance to interact with us, they wouldn't think we're arrogant or self-absorbed. And they might better understand that we don't have anything to do with being chosen.

It would be fun to do something like a camp, where we invite the youth from the different races to spend a few days or so with all of us younger Dragon Riders. We could teach them a little of what we learn and give them rides on our dragons. Things like that. It might work to have a camp like this right after the Choosing Ceremony each year, since all of the youth are already gathered anyway. Then those who didn't get chosen wouldn't feel so disappointed that they came all that way for nothing. If you think your parents might be open to it, mention it. Then we can all talk about it in more detail when you get here.

Lena paused for a moment and thought again about Will's idea. The more she considered it, the more she agreed that something like what he suggested might be really fun and really helpful. She decided to ask her father and discuss it with the other youth when they got to the Isle. The next Choosing Ceremony would be happening in Ellesméra about a month after the birthdays, and many of the inhabitants of the Isle were already planning on going for it. Maybe they would be able to quickly plan something to happen afterwards.

The letter went on, We have a lot of fun things planned for your visit to try to make it special, since you're coming for your (our) sixteenth birthday. Var and I came up with some saddles for the dragons that can be used for swimming. They're really light and basically just protect our legs from the scales since we don't want to wear riding boots or leather pants while swimming. They also make it easier to stay on the dragons' backs while they dive and swim around. They can seat more than one passenger, so you'll have to try it out with me. We'll play some games to see how big of a splash we can make.

Mother and Aunt Arya also finally talked us (the males) into having a dance. All of the girls wanted to straightaway, of course. We were all more reluctant, but Zadí and Keeta and Brin and Hanna were all desperate, so we gave in. Aren't we so gallant? Teasing, again. But I suppose it will be fun if you'll be my first partner. Will you? The elves have been teaching me and Var how to dance so we don't look like bumbling fools. I think I still will, but if I'm dancing with you, no one will notice me so it won't matter. Brom and Nefin are naturals, of course. But if they ever tease us about it, we can still easily pin them to the ground in about half a second.

Lena giggled. Will was always making her laugh. He and Var were really good fighters, though Brom and Nefin were so quick. But she was more amused picturing him dancing. She already knew she would definitely agree to be his first partner and hopefully be able to dance with him a lot more than only at first.

Will's next words were, The girls are doing well. Willow and Monrow are really excited to see you too. They remember how we all used to play house when we were younger. And Ray is getting bigger. He just turned three. It's funny when he pretends to wrestle with me or Var. Kind of like when we try to wrestle with father. Someday we might be that big, but not yet. The baby is so adorable. She just starting to walk and jabbers nonstop, just like Var and I used to do, or so Mother says. She and Father are already talking about the next one. It seems like they're more in love every day, and I'm glad they seem to like having so many children. It's fun being a big brother to so many younger siblings. Var and I think it's good practice for the day we get to be fathers.

One thing Lena liked most about Will was how kind he was to his younger siblings and how much he seemed to enjoy being a brother. She had often noticed how respectfully he treated his mother and knew it was because Will and Var learned from the perfect example of their father Varhog.

The last few lines of the letter read, My horns are almost to the back of my head now. Father told me his began curling down when he was seventeen, so only a little over a year away. We still don't know if we'll do the Urgals' initiation tradition to prove our courage. We'd obviously have to do it without our dragons. And alone. That'd probably be harder than killing a wolf or bear, which neither Var nor I want to do after learning how to meditate like the Riders.

I hope you get this before you leave. And that you'll arrive here safely. I'm counting down the days.

I don't know if I should say "Love," or "Sincerely," or what.

Your friend,

Will

The smile that always covered Lena's face when she finished Will's letter was there once again. She asked herself the same thing. Should he say "Love, Will"? What would she think of that? Lena knew it would make her heart flutter if he did. That he was even contemplating it already made her heart flutter. But the familiar worry also revisited her. What would her father and mother think if she admitted that she liked—and maybe even loved—a part human, part Urgal boy? Would such a match be appropriate for the crown princess of Alagaёsia?

She glanced at the clock on her desk and realized that her father would be mentally checking on her soon. He did that every night. With the younger ones, he just always did and they never really knew the difference. But once she had begun to recognize it happening when she was about six, her father had asked her permission to continue, and he had done the same once any of her siblings reached the same age.

Lena had agreed of course. She loved the reassurance of having her father check on her every night. Many nights she was already asleep when it happened. But other nights she was still aware enough to feel the familiar tone of his mind briefly touching hers to make sure she was safe and sound and where she should be. Tonight she knew there was no way she would be able to pretend she was asleep before he checked, and she didn't want to anyway. He had only arrived home from his three-week trip a couple of days earlier, and she wanted to talk to her father that night.

Though Lena couldn't communicate with her mind as the Dragon Riders learned to, she knew if she simply thought her desire, her father would get the message.

So after another couple of minutes had passed and she felt her father's mind reaching for hers, Lena thought, Can I talk to you tonight, Father?

Lena felt her father's surprise and then his answering thought, Of course, sweetheart. I'll be right there.