Chapter 10: Long Live the King

Keeping a firm grip on his rifle, Tucker glared angrily at the Reds, "You have literally the worst timing."

"Stow it, thin mint!" Sarge snapped, jumping off Red Glory's turret, "We're no longer fraternizing with the enemy."

Tucker frowned, "'Thin mint'?"

"Now see, when he says 'we', imagine he's only referring to himself," Grif advised, "Do not group us together."

"My armor's aqua!" Tucker yelled, "I think."

Washington took a step closer, still holding his rifle, "What the heck are you two doing?"

"Uh, again, not 'two', just him," Grif repeated, "I can't stress this enough."

Sarge raised his shotgun and pointed it at Wash's face, "You made me believe that Reds and Blues can coexist, and we can work together as one people, and that we can all get together and be a little... purple."

"We can! We are!" Wash yelled, pushing the gun away, "Seriously, what the crap is this about?"

"You kidnapped one of my men!" Sarge shouted.

"Who, me?" Simmons cried out.

"He wasn't kidnapped, moron," Rhode retorted, "He came over here by himself! We can't get him to leave."

Sarge lowered his gun and turned to his pet private, "Is this true, Simmons?"

"It's not your fault, Sir," Simmons explained, "It's Grif's."

Grif was stunned, "What did I do?"

"You're disgusting, Grif!"

"Well, yeah. But I've always been like that. Sarge was the one that decided to take half the base for himself."

"Oh..." Simmons turned back to Sarge, "Then I guess this is your fault, Sir."

Sarge raised his gun again, this time pointing it at Simmons, "Then that makes you a traitor!"

"What?" Simmons gasped.

Quickly Freckles raised its gun turret, "THREAT LEVEL INCREASED."

"Uh, yeah, no reason for panic," Caboose gulped nervously, "Everything's fine. Might anyone have a rolled-up newspaper at the ready?"

Sarge ignored him.

"You weren't kidnapped!" he growled at Simmons, "You deliberately joined the enemy!"

"But if he wasn't kidnapped, that would mean we were never the enemy in the first place!" Tucker pointed out.

"Don't try to confuse me with your words, shamrock!" Sarge snapped.

"I'm aqua!"

"Tucker, calm down," Wash ordered.

"Me?" Tucker cried, "These guys roll up in a freaking assault jeep, and you choose to yell at me?"

"Look, tensions are high-"

"No kidding, Washington." Tucker turned and glowered at his leader, "I'm tired of you bossing us around."

"Now is not the time."

"You know, I disagree. We were having a talk when Tweedledee and Tweedle-freaking-idiot decided to interrupt, so let's finish this."

"There is nothing to finish!"

Grif scratched his helmet in confusion, "Are we interrupting some sort of lovers' quarrel right now?"

"I can't blame you for thinking that," Rhode told him.

Tucker ignored him as he stepped closer to Wash, his visor reflecting the ex-Freelancer's face, "You are the worst thing to happen to this team since Blue-boy over there decided to show up."

"I am a man!" Caboose cut in. "Blue man!"

"You take that back!" Simmons yelled, pointing accusingly at Tucker, "Wash is a great leader... I assume."

"Blasphemy!" Sarge bellowed.

Freckles raised its missile turret, "DEADLY THREAT AUTHORIZED."

"Seriously," Tucker scowled, "I would rather follow Caboose into battle than you."

"Oh, really?" Wash sneered sarcastically, "Then let's just make him the leader, see how much better off you are! You think so, Rhode?"

"Sure," Rhode said sarcastically, "That would be great."

Caboose perked up at this, "Well, I humbly accept your nomination and accept the position."

"Shut up!" Wash, Rhode, and Tucker yelled.

Suddenly, Freckles turned to the other Blues, "DO NOT TALK BACK TO YOUR COMMANDING OFFICER."

"Wash and I are having an argument," Tucker replied crossly, "I will be talking back to him. That's how arguments work, you toaster."

But Freckles shook its giant head, "WASHINGTON IS NOT THE COMMANDING OFFICER."

"What?" Tucker gasped.

"What?" Rhode sputtered.

"What?!" Wash yelled.

"IN A UNANIMOUS DECISION BY THE BLUE TEAM, CABOOSE HAS BEEN PROMOTED TO BLUE LEADER," Freckles explained, "CAPTAIN CABOOSE IS NOW YOUR COMMANDING OFFICER. DO NOT TALK BACK TO YOUR COMMANDING OFFICER."

Grif swallowed hard, "Oh, crap."

"Well, yep," Caboose beamed, puffing out his chest with pride, "This is gonna be a lot of fun."

"No, Caboose, you can't!" Wash ran towards Caboose, but was stopped by the Mantis pointing its turrets at him, "Look, Freckles, this is a misunderstanding!"

Simmons stared at the Blues in horror, "Caboose is team leader? Forget this."

"Oh, don't worry, Simmons," Caboose reassured, "As my first duty as leader in the position of the nomination, I say you can be on Blue Team... forever!"

"No thanks, I'm good," Simmons insisted, stepping towards the Reds' Warthog.

But then Freckles fired its gun turret at his feet, making him stop, "PRIVATE SIMMONS."

"Oh no," Simmons whimpered.

"DESERTING YOUR POST WILL DESIGNATE YOU AS AWOL. THIS DESIGNATION IS PUNISHABLE BY DEATH."

"WHAT?!" Simmons screamed.

"Uh, hey, Sarge," Grif called out, "Now the Blues have kidnapped Simmons."

"Then it's war!" Sarge leapt behind the turret and turned it towards Freckles.

"Wait! Stop!" Wash cried out.

But Sarge was already powering up the gun, at the same time that Freckles was powering up its missile launcher, "Say hello to Robot Satan, you mechanical son of a-"

"BAIL!" Grif yelped, diving out of the driver's seat just as Freckles fired a missile at Red Glory.

KABOOOOOMMM! The jeep exploded in a massive ball of flame, throwing Sarge out onto the grass.

"Whoa!" Rhode gasped.

"Sarge!" Simmons screamed, running over to his leader.

"Freckles, bad!" Caboose scolded, "Bad! No!"

"PRIMARY THREAT ELIMINATED," Freckles declared.

Just then, Lopez Dos.0 came running toward them.

"¿Cuál es esa explosio- Mierda!" he gasped when he saw the burning wreck of Red Glory, "¿Qué has hecho?" (What was that explos- HOLY CRAP! WHAT DID YOU DO?)"

Simmons knelt by his leader and helped him to his feet, "Sarge, are you okay?"

"No, Simmons," Sarge grunted, clutching the wounds on his side, "I'm afraid I won't be okay... until I exact my revenge!"

"Seriously, I am not affiliated with this lunatic," Grif called out from behind a boulder, "He does not speak for me."

Despite his injuries, Sarge picked up his shotgun and charged towards Freckles with a fierce battle cry, "HYAAAAAH!"

Again, Freckles raised its turrets, "ENGAGING TARGET."

"Freckles, no!" Caboose shouted.

"Sarge, don't!" Rhode yelled, running towards the Red leader in attempt to stop him.

Suddenly, a loud shot rang out across the canyon, making everyone stop in their tracks, including Freckles amazingly. Puzzled, the Reds and Blues looked at each other to find who had fired their weapon, but nobody responded.

Then as one, they slowly turned towards the middle of the canyon... and there on the edge of the ramp, holding a pistol high in the air, was a Spartan-II wearing bright pink armor and a big grin on his face, "Man, you guys are really noisy."

For several seconds, no one dared to speak.

Then Grif ran out of his hiding place with a great cheer, "It's Donut! We're saved!"

With shouts of joy and ecstasy, the Reds, Wash, Rhode, and Tucker ran over to the pink private and grabbed in a big group hug.

"Aw, you must have really missed me!" Donut chuckled.

"Donut, thank God you're here!" Grif cried.

"We were just about ready to kill each other," Sarge added.

"Speak for yourself," Tucker scoffed.

Wash quickly recovered and looked around, "Where's the ship?"

Donut looked confused. "What ship?"

"The ship you came here on," Rhode said, "The rescue team."

"Ohhh, yeah, duh!" Donut cleared his throat, "Allow me to introduce: the rescue team!"

He took a step aside to reveal a second Spartan, this one wearing purple armor with a red cross on a white sticker on his chest, and waving nervously, "'Sup?"

"Doc?!" Simmons cried.

"Wait," Wash muttered, "What is this?"

"Donut told me you guys needed help," Doc explained.

"So I got the best help money could buy!" Donut finished proudly.

"You didn't pay me."

"And I didn't tip the pilot! That's formality."

"What pilot?" Sarge asked.

"The pilot that dropped us off, dummy."

"'Dropped you off'?" Tucker cried.

"As in, he's not here anymore?" Grif added.

"Exactly," Donut replied.

At that moment, Caboose ran up to the group, "'Sup?"

Wash sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, "So you're telling me... that you heard the distress signal... grabbed Doc... hopped on a ship... and then TOLD THE SHIP TO LEAVE? AND THAT'S YOUR IDEA OF SENDING HELP?!"

"What? No!" Donut cried, while behind, Doc slowly began to back away, "I brought Lopez, too!"

With that, he reached behind his back and then brandished a brown Mark VI helmet with broken wires hanging out the bottom. Lopez Dos.0 went to look at the helmet and was stunned to see glowing green eyes staring back at him.

"Qué... Carajo." (What... the crap.)

Silently, the Reds and Blues all turned to look at each other, processing the information that Donut had told them.

Then Sarge spoke the words that everybody, even Caboose, was thinking, "KILL HIM!"

Doc turned to flee the scene but was quickly tackled by the Reds. The Blues meanwhile grabbed Donut and started dragging him towards the boulder.

"Someone get this maniac turquoise guy away from me!" Donut yelped.

"I'M AQUA!" Tucker screamed.

XXX

At that moment, on a cliff overlooking the Blue Base, the figure observed through the sniper scope as the Reds and Blues began to beat up Donut and Doc, Sarge using the original Lopez as a bludgeon.

With a deep chuckle, he stepped out of the shade of the tree, revealing his grey-and-green armor, "Unfortunate..."

He then pressed a button on his right gauntlet and disappeared into thin air.

XXX

And the plot thickens even more! Because apparently, this guy has cloaking. Till next time guys!