C. M. Black:Blood of a Dog

Chapter XI: By your side

Warmth flowed from the flickering fire, embers fluttering down onto the slate in front. The logs crackled and burnt, hissing gently underneath the conversation between Hermione and Hagrid. She was crying, sniffing loudly behind a dun cloth Hagrid had handed her. Her eyes were rimmed with red and her cheeks were flushed, breathing harshly with the exertion to breath normally. Cassy's hand was on her back, rubbing it slowly. It did not do much to help.

Cassy looked towards Hagrid, who eyed her warily from where he was making Hermione another cup of tea. He had chatted with them, gasping and tutting in the right places as Hermione explained what had happened. Harry and Neville had been asked after when the girls turned up without them and Hermione could not stop the sniff that began it all. Cassy was alarmed to say that Hermione was taking Harry's anger worse than herself. She knew it had something to do with the strain that the other was all ready under with all of her work - too much, Hagrid had said at once. She was trying to do too much. Still, Hermione refused to beg and apologise and Cassy supported that wholly.

'I'll speak ter him if he comes around,' said Hagrid, setting the mug down on the table.

'It's okay, Hagrid,' said Hermione weakly. 'He'll just get mad at you if you say something and I don't want that.'

'Never you mind what he says ter me,' said Hagrid gruffly.

According to Neville, Harry had not said much in the two days since Christmas. He would speak when spoken to, but never said anything more than necessary. Caught in his thoughts, was what Neville had called it, and they all knew Harry well enough to know that was not a good thing. Neville spent the evenings with the girls after Harry went to bed early in the night, although he was not sure Harry was ever really asleep when he finally went to bed himself. He could hear him tossing and turning in the early hours of the morning, restless and agitated. Neville was sure Harry was close to coming around, but no one could see how he thought that.

Cassy gave Hermione's back a particularly hard thump as she chocked a sob into her drink.

''Ave yer tried speakin' ter him, Cassy?' asked Hagrid.

'That would make things a lot worse than they are now,' she said after a pause. 'Harry and I are on worse terms that he and Hermione.'

Hagrid looked shocked.

'What happened there then?' he demanded, throwing his hands down in shock to connect loudly with the table.

'Some uncomfortable truths,' she muttered, ignoring Hagrid's 'what?'. She pushed the chair backwards and grabbed her coat from the back of it, leaving her scarf and gloves on the table. 'I'm going to get some air. It's a bit stuffy in here.'

It was a rude exit and she could hear Hagrid's confused called as the door slammed shut behind her, but she could not explain it to him and he would not take no for an answer. At least she was leaving Hermione in good hands, she thought, as she stared across the expanse of the Black Lake. The recumbent limbs of the ancient trees around her creaked under the weight of the snow, water dripping from the bare branches, piercing the snow beneath with continuous splatters. Hellebores protruded with a fierce defiance, littering the lining of trees that lead to the Forbidden Forest with pink.

Not for the first time since their meeting, Cassy thought about what Professor Lupin had said to her. She understood it well, although there was no ground-breaking realisation to come from it. The idea of wearing her heart on her sleeve and greeting everyone with the same cheer she did her friends was ludicrous. What she really took from the evening, she admitted to Neville the next night, was that she had it better than many people, especially Harry. She had people who loved her all her childhood, weather her father was there or not. Harry had had no one and it was her father that took it away from him. He had every right to be angry and it must have been so much harder for him with her there as a reminder.

Cassy rubbed her hands together. A sinking feeling filled her stomach and she faintly wondered if she felt guilty for her thoughts.

If she could speak to Harry right then, she knew what she would have said. She would have told him she had not known, and perhaps he would admit they he knew she had not. Then she would have scowled and let out a biting complaint that he should not have hit her. It did not matter that she understood, she understood the unadulterated rage and confusion he must have felt, she felt a similar surge herself, but to knock her to the ground was unfair. Maybe Harry would look ashamed, ruffle his hair as he always did and think of something smart to say, but end up with a raw, emotional admittance that left her anger feeling terribly misplaced. Defending herself in the only way she knew how to – calmly, strongly, fierce undertones and an uncompromising position – she would ask how she ever would have known.

Draco had, she knew that the moment Harry vanished from sight. The query of why Harry had not sought out Sirius, the smirk and the surprise, it made sense and Cassy wondered why he had not told her. Narcissa may have sworn him to secrecy, he had said so the moment she cornered him before dinner the same day, but that meant nothing. He had told her far more before that.

'He's a Pratt, Cass, I've told you that for ages now,' Draco had said, leaning back on the stone railings.

'You could have told me,' she ground out. Her voice wavered slightly, not enough for anyone to normally catch, but Draco knew her well. He fixed her with a warning stare, one that clearly told her not to start crying or he would vanish immediately. That would be a lie.

'I was warned not to, by more than one person.' He did not look at her. 'He could never understand. He's been raised in this perfect bubble, Saint Potter. People like us can never be friends with people like them. Sirius was doing his duty as a pure-blood, Potter has as little sense as his father. He should of just joined instead of protecting that mudblood wife of his.'

There was a sharp, deafening crack. Cassy's hand had connected forcefully with Draco's cheek.

'You know nothing of Harry's life. Something makes me feel as though you wanted Harry and I to fight, it would not be the first time you have tried to pull us apart,' she said softly, her gaze unwavering as Draco stared at her in utter shock. 'You know, you are staring to sound a lot like Lucius. Do you not think it is time to stop living under daddy's cloak and think for yourself?'

Draco sneered at her, his face red. His lips were drawn back to bite back, but Cassy had one final thing to say as she turned to walk away.

'I would be proud to be anything like Lily Potter.'

She and Draco had not spoken since then. He would not even look at her and Cassy felt as though she had finally tipped the balance on what was forgiveable. Somewhere in the mix of it all, she could not bring herself to care too much. The sense of betrayal had faded and she accepted that it was just a very Draco-like thing to do, but that did not make her anymore pleased about it. Yet, she did worry that he had told Narcissa. Cassy would rather her older cousin was not angry with her. She did not care what Lucius thought in the slightest. She half expected a Howler.

Even rubbing her hands together more fiercely, Cassy could not bring feeling back to her fingers. Her feet were heavy and a chill had set in her bones. The temperature must have dropped as she was recalling, she thought, until the ache in her chest intensified suddenly. Raising one hand to clumsily clasp the front of her coat, she breathed in short, sharp rasps, puffs of white visible in front of her, then blending indistinguishably into the snow as she fell forwards. She did not even feel her thinly covered knees hit the snow, nor hear the crunch. All she heard was a high, distant ringing.

Bowed, her head turned trying to look back wards Hagrid's hut. As she did so, she noticed the slow crumble of the flowers, their leaves whitening and crinkling.

Cassy's eyes winded and she forced herself to her feet. They were too heavy and her arms barely managed to soften the blow when she fell face first to the ground after turning. She gasped. Her lungs would not work. She was suffocating. With great effort, she threw herself onto her back just in time to see the cloaked figure swoop over her. Its face was above hers, hovering, closed mouth and Cassy let out a cry.

'Help!' she called. Her voice was croaky and weak, no one would hear it. She gasped and tried again, calling louder this time with everything she had, but she knew it was ridiculous to hope that either Hermione or Hagrid had heard her so far away. Desperately, she scrambled backwards. Snow splattered against the cloak of the Dementor. It drifted forward, closing in as Cassy's strength finally gave out once and for all. Blistered eyes watched her, unseeing, then leant in close and opened its mouth. Cassy felt her eyes roll back into her head, the ringing becoming unbearable, a voice filling her head again, screaming and crying – then, as though very far away, she heard something else. A low, continuous bark.

Barely visible behind the frosted windows, fingers rapped at the glass. They clinked and scratched, tearing through the thick layer that had settled over the past few weeks of grey skies and icy nights. The light within the hut flickered and spat, but it seemed too dim. It barely warmed the tiny room.

Hermione stood beside Hagrid, refusing to be huddled aside by him. Her wand was drawn, although useless, and aimed at the window. Her hands were almost steady. Looking at Hagrid, she could see him shiver and breath deeply, having ran from his hut and back and worse having thrown himself at a Dementor in the process, for in his arms lay the limp form of Cassy. Hermione was not even sure she was breathing.

The Dementor outside drifted backwards, but Fang did not stop barking.

'Is that it then?' asked Hermione stiffly. 'Has it given up?'

'I don't know,' muttered Hagrid, moving towards his armchair. He placed Cassy down onto it, curling her up and Hermione was instantly at her side, fingers on her icy neck. He unbolted the door and poked his head out, before stepping out fully and shutting it again behind him. Fang whined.

Beneath Hermione's fingers there was a slow, faint rhythm. She sighed deeply and then placed her hand under Cassy's nose just to make sure she was still breathing too. When she found she was – if just - she took the other's hands in her hands, rubbing them vigorously to try and return some healthy hue to her purple fingers.

She watched anxiously as Hagrid re-entered his hut.

'Well?' she asked.

'There's not one in sight. I need yer to run up ter the castle and tell Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall what's 'appened,' he said, picking up Cassy once again.

Hermione nodded and took off quickly through the snow, careful not to slip in the icy steps. She did not stop as she skidded over the stone floor and thundered up the marble staircase, ignoring the calls of the portraits to slow down. Down the first floor corridors and straight towards the Defence Tower first, knowing it was the closest. Professor McGonagall could send for the Headmaster herself, because Hermione had somewhere else she needed to go next.

She did not stop to knock on the door. It burst open, startling the other within, but before she could be scolded Hermione burst into frantic chatter.

'Professor, you have to go quickly. A Dementor has attacked Cassy and she's not well, Hagrid's brining her in now, but-'

Hermione did not have to finish her sentence, for Professor McGonagall was already out of her seat and bustling towards her.

'Goodness, why was she on the grounds? Had no one told her?' mumbled Professor McGonagall as she past.

Hermione did not bother to enquire further into that comment, instead she turned on her heel and headed back towards the staircases. Huffing as she gave the password, she darted into the common room, praying that they would be there before finally rounding on Harry and Neville, who both looked up at her in surprise.

'Hermione?' asked Neville, rising at the sight of her obvious distress.

'It's Cassy,' she heaved. 'A Dementor's attacked her and she's barely breathing. She's in the hospital wing.'

There was no clear moment when Hermione realised that Harry was by her and Neville's side as they sprinted towards the hospital wing, but she was glad he was. When they burst through the doors, Madam Pomfrey was conducting the last of her checks. She did not bother to look up at them. A green light flickered on the end of her wand and she nodded to Professor McGonagall and the Headmaster before moving away. The two stayed and watched Cassy for a moment as the three friends approached slowly.

'How is she?' asked Neville.

'Miss Black will be fine after some rest,' said Professor Dumbledore softly. 'It was very close.'

The three breathed a sigh of relief.

'What happened exactly?' questioned Professor McGonagall, turning to Hermione, who shrank slightly under all the attention. She gave a very abridge version of events, not wanting to admit she had been crying, nor that she and Harry had fought. She said that there had been a commotion outside, it sounded like shouting and although the ground was upturned when she and Hagrid got to the lake, there was only Cassy laying still on the ground with the Dementor several feet away. Hagrid had ran over to get her, hauling her back to his hut, even as the Dementor turned on him, angry and craving.

'I think, Miss Black is very lucky to be alive,' said Professor Dumbledore gravely. 'I expect that the Dementor thought she was her father as they probably posses similar auras due to their close relation. I would advise you not to let her out of sight if you must be on the grounds. We cannot assume this will be an isolated incident.'

Somewhere between Cassy arriving in the hospital wing and her friends appearing, her hair had been taken out of the bun it was in. Her thick, black hair cascaded across her pillow making her skin appallingly gaunt. She was tucked in many blankets that thinly veiled the fact that she was now shivering. Madam Pomfrey assured them that that was a good sign; at least her body could function enough to try and warm itself.

Unable to ignore the faces, she allowed the three to stay by Cassy's bedside. Once she had bustled into the back room, Neville and Hermione pulled up chairs to seat themselves closely. Harry did not move. Instead, he lingered awkwardly, hands in his pockets and eyes fixated on her face. Even when Hermione and Neville got up to go for lunch an hour later – some light conversation had been passed between the two – Harry did not move. They did not urge him to either.

The doors pulled shut and for a second Harry expected Madam Pomfrey to shoo him out as she too stood to leave, but with a stern look from her and a nod from him, she let him be. He disregarded the pitying look on her face that had flashed across for just a moment. He did not want it.

He took Hermione's vacated seat and for a time be did nothing, until eventually he reached up and took her hand that was folded over the sheets. Squeezing it, he looked around, trying to think of something to say, if that would help at all. He wondered if he would have felt the same last year if he had actually made it into see Cassy when she had been petrified. Perhaps he would have felt so foolish for wishing desperately to speak to her then, at least he could hope that she could hear him.

His anger at her had washed away many days ago, shortly after it had arrived in reality. The weight of his parents' betrayal had not and the more the thoughts swirled around in his head the more he could not bare to look her in the eye. That did not mean, however, that he did not look to her. He did when she was not aware and he watched in rage as she laughed with Ron, seemingly forgetting everything so quickly. That too, faded when he began to weigh the time she then spent alone, the meals that she would miss and how she rarely turned up for breakfast at all. He wondered if she had trouble sleeping like he did. He wished he had just asked her.

'I'm sorry,' he muttered, squeezing her hand. 'It was never the fact that it was your dad that upset me... it was the thought that they had trusted him and that I trusted you with my life too and... wow, that sounds really stupid when I say it aloud, doesn't it?' He forced a laugh.

'You sound stupid when you laugh like that.'

Harry's eyes darted to Cassy's face. Her eyes were still closed, but he found himself calling her name uncertainly.

'I would open my eyes, but it is rather bright,' she said and Harry laughed for real, tightening his grip on her again. 'I take it someone thought to put me in a bed below a window? I want them discharged.'

'Are you all right? How do you feel?' he said raising to get a proper look at her face. She did not look any better than before, especially when she squinted as she opened her eyes.

'Awful,' she replied honestly.

'I should have expected that, to be fair,' he said.

Harry let go of her hand and helped her sit up although she tried to bat him away. She sighed deeply and stared at him before rubbing her eyes tiredly.

'We need to talk,' he said knowingly.

'You have nothing to explain.'

'I do,' he countered. 'At least, I would like to. That's for when you're not looking as though you'll faint again.'

'I did not faint. That makes me sound like a swooning housewife. I collapsed,' grumbled Cassy, unable to stop a smile breaking onto her face as Harry let out a round of laughter. The weight in their guts finally lifted.

It was not until the next evening when Cassy and Harry were able to sit and talk. Madam Pomfrey had kept her in the previous night as her blood pressure was still low, but released her lunch the next day. The afternoon was spent just enjoying each other's company, the four of them simply pleased to be all back together. Harry had apologised to Hermione, assuring her that he did know she was doing it for him. She had held up her hand, halting him and said she understood. He had a lot going on and she had tipped him over the edge by taking away the little bit of joy he had found. She looked tearfully pleased anyway.

At dinner, Cassy had received a nod from Professor Lupin that she had been inclined to ignore because of his 'I told you so' smile, but in the end she relented and smiled slightly herself before turning back to her mountain of food Madam Pomfrey had instructed her to eat. Neville seemed to take this whole heartedly to the point of trying to force feed her which just ended up with potato flung halfway down the table.

It was when the four retreated back to the common room that Cassy and Harry were left alone. Neville and Hermione had returned to their dormitories in tandem, allowing the remaining two to take seats on the sofa in from of the fire. Their conversation slowly fizzled and it took Harry a moment to think of what he wanted to say.

'I really am sorry. I was just so shocked by everything that I needed some time alone and once I had pulled away, I didn't know what to say to you to bring you back. You must have been so angry at me when it looked like I hated you for who your family is, but that wasn't it at all.

'I just... My parents trusted Black with their lives, they gave everything they had to him and he let them down. I then thought that maybe you...' he trailed off.

'Would do the same to you one day,' finished Cassy with a slow nod. 'I understand. Why would you not think that? Harry, I would rather die than do something like that to you, to any of my friends. I swear to you.'

Harry nodded and said, 'I know. I get that and it was stupid of me to think it, because when I thought about it when you were in the hospital wing I realised that it didn't have to be you. It could be anyone that does that to me and I would never see it coming. Anyone has that ability and the only way to avoid it is to let go of everyone and I won't do that. You're not like him, Cassy, and I'm sorry for thinking for a moment that you were.'

'You have nothing to be sorry for, Harry. Everyone does it. Everyone makes assumption,' she said with a faint smile. Her expression suddenly flattened. 'You still should not have hit me.'

Harry cringed. 'Sorry! I wasn't thinking – I mean it, it's not an excuse. I just turned. I'd never purposefully hit you, you do know that, right?' His lips were quickly pressed into a thin line when he looked at Cassy long enough to see her unabashed enthusiasm at his flustered chatter. Smacking her arm lightly, he asked: 'How do you feel now, by the way? Does Alphard know about the Dementor?'

'No, thank Merlin,' scoffed Cassy. 'Could you imagine that? I have no plans of telling him that either. Perhaps not Dean as well, I got quite the lecture from him when he heard about what happened on the train, I would rather not get another.'

Harry laughed. 'It will only make things worse when he finds out, you know. Dean's a great guy, he tries to look out for everyone.'

'I know that. He becomes quite smothering at times though,' she said flatly, ignoring the way Harry laughed again.

'Lupin's Dementor lessons begin on the first Thursday after the holidays. Maybe you should join,' he suggested.

Cassy shook her head and curled her legs up onto the chair. She eyed Harry lazily.

'I can't. Teaching you is something he can just get away with, seeing how partial they are to you and while they are attracted to me as well, teaching two students would only cause issues. If anyone were to notice, they might be inclined to ask for lessons as well, having one student as special circumstances is passable, but two all ready looks like a class. I doubt Professor Lupin would be able to fend off others and then no one could be taught.'

'What's the likelihood of anyone actually noticing us attending these classes though?' he asked with a raised eyebrow.

'Quite high, actually, given the staff who follow you around so much. Besides, it is not as though we spend our evenings in the library. People will begin to notice if we are both not in the common room and once things start to spread...'

'You can't stop them,' finished Harry with a nod. 'Those still sound like excuses, you know.'

Cassy huffed and rolled her eyes, but Harry looked thoughtful when she looked back at him. He stared for a second before awkwardly announcing: 'I could always try and teach you what he shows me.'

'Really?' Cassy blinked owlishly.

'Maybe,' he said with a shrug. 'I probably won't be a good teacher and you're better off going yourself, but... if you're teaching me Magic customs and laws, I guess I could try and return the favour.'

Cassy beamed at him. She genuinely felt that she could not attend Professor Lupin's classes, both for the fact it would be noticed and that he was too fond of Harry for her to feel welcomed in their little class. Professor Lupin had not been hesitant to tell her exactly what he thought of her on Christmas evening. Most importantly, Cassy was all ready picturing the look on Hermione's face when she eventually found out. It would be beautiful.

'Cassy,' said Harry suddenly, shaking her out of her thoughts. 'Can I ask you something?'

'You just did, but go ahead,' she said.

'What is your Boggart?'

Cassy was quiet for a time and stared at Harry intensely. He waved his hand and tried to take the question back, but Cassy shook her head. Twisting to face him, she folded her legs across the chair and entwined her hands in her lap.

'Not all muggles react to magic the way your relatives do. They do not all hate it, but everyone fears it. Their wonder and excitement always leads back to fear. They fear what it can do, they fear what the people can do. It does not matter how excited they are by the prospect of magic. Muggles and magic can never co-exist in complete harmony. I guarantee that even the most accepting parents of muggle-born children are wary beneath their smiles. It just takes something to make that fear spill over and then everyone will see it,' she said calmly.

Neither Cassy's voice nor face showed any emotion. It was if she was reading from a book, a well practised speech, and Harry found himself mildly horrified by what she was saying, but he could not interrupt.

'My Boggart is my mother,' she said, noting the shock that erupted in Harry's bright green eyes. 'I knew it would be the moment I stepped into that room and saw the cabinet. It was really the only thing that came to mind.'

'Your mum?' repeated Harry loudly. 'Isn't your mum...'

'Dead? Yes, she is, but she died when I was six and I can remember seeing her twice before that,' said Cassy in the same conversational tone, which was beginning to make Harry uncomfortable.

'What happened?' he asked.

'I do not know everything. The only person that would is my father, but I expect I will never get the full story from him. What I do know is that my parents met shortly after my father graduated from Hogwarts. My mother held some muggle profession and lived what seemed like an ordinary muggle life. She leant about magic from my father when they began dating, she told me she loved hearing about his adventures at school. He was apparently quite the trouble maker, Alphard would be the first to tell you that.' Cassy paused for a moment, looking down at her hands in thought. She blinked slowly.

'I cannot say what happened next. It is expected that she realised the magnitude of magic and understood what it could do to someone like her, of course, no one knows for sure. They assume that is what happened because of the way she spoke about magic. She would praise it and then curse it, screaming at the wardens suddenly, not that anyone paid her any mind.'

'Wardens?' asked Harry.

'Sometime between conceiving me – an accident, I was assured – ' she added lowly, 'and my birth she had this grand realisation. So when I was actually born, she went a little strange. It was in the paper, in the end, although you cannot believe everything you read in the Daily Prophet. It said that my father had split up with her, no reason stated, and that she had refused to let him see me. I think she thought he would take me away. If he did, there would be little she could have done about it. He could have disappeared from the muggle world and no one would have believed her... She refused to let anyone see me, even other muggles. I do not understand it, Harry. I cannot say much about it other than my mother went mad and my father fought for custody. In the settlement it was agreed that she would have to be moved to an asylum, a magical one in Devon, so she could be assessed for a time without exposing our world. Although, I don't suppose anyone would listen to the cries of a mad woman. I first visited her when I was five.'

Cassy had been dressed in blue with little white shoes and her hair falling loosely down her back. She walked down each hall, one hand tucked in Alphard's and the other on a scruffy stuffed bear that she loved dearly, listening to the moans and cries within each room. Occasionally, she would hear soft whistles and see arms reaching through the bars on the doors; she never looked at them, she looked straight ahead as Alphard instructed her to. She never dared to talk back to them.

Suddenly, the man in blue stopped outside a door with a large plastic window. It did not lead to a bedroom like the others, but rather an ugly, plain sitting room, with the furniture charmed to the ground and the sound of a poorly tuned radio echoing from somewhere beyond the walls.

There was only one person inside the room; a woman with long, greasy blonde hair, long limbs and and an oval face. Her eyes were large and deep blue, Cassy noticed, like her own.

Alphard did not tug her into the room, nor did he let go of her hand. In fact, his grip tightened when the woman turned to them. At first, her eyes lingered on Alphard in confusion, but as they followed down his arm they brightened and she emitted a strange, hoarse gasp that sent Cassy reeling back behind her uncle.

'No,no,' hushed the woman with a sob. She held out her arms as if expecting Cassy to run into them. She did not. Undeterred, the woman let them fall to her side and simply smiled and for a moment Cassy thought she looked beautiful.

'Jane Lowe,' said the man in blue – upon reflection Cassy realised he must have been a mental health nurse - ' this is Alphard Black, the guardian of Cassiopeia Black, your daughter.'

Her mother held still and she looked at Alphard with a critical expression. He did not waver under it, but gently squeezed Cassy's hand as she tightened her own fearfully.

'What happened to Sirius?' she demanded. 'Why is he not raising our daughter?'

'I am afraid my nephew is indisposed and will be for a long time. Thus, Cassy went to the next of kin. In this case, it was me,' replied Alphard calmly, even as the tall woman rose dangerously.

'Her next of kin is me,' she had said softly.

Cassy could not remember much beyond that point. Her mother and Alphard had talked for the better part of half an hour and he had even let her close enough to run a hand through Cassy's hair. Cassy never let go of his hand though. All she saw through that flash of a beautiful smile was a sickly stranger. She fidgeted under her touch, but her mother did not seem to mind.

'It was not until the second time I went to see her that it became obvious how sick she was though,' said Cassy to Harry, removing all previous thoughts from her mind.

Cassy had sat on the ground with a newspaper spread out in front of her. She slowly ready down each column, not always taking in what it said and occasionally piping up about words she did not yet understand. Her mother would hush her, replying gently and telling her anything she wanted to know when she knew it, while running her hands through Cassy's hair and twisting in into a French plait.

On the other side of the room was Alphard, tucked into a corner, yet always watching behind the paper he held. Jane did not seem to notice as she hummed softly, sounding as thought it was a lazy Sunday afternoon and she and her daughter had finished pegging out the laundry together. She smiled and kissed the top of Cassy's head, unflinching as a low buzz emitted through the room.

'The timer went off on my second visit to tell us it was time to leave, but instead of letting me go she heaved me into her lap and pulled the paper closer, asking what I was reading. I remember looking to Alphard and he was staring straight back with a peculiar expression. I didn't think too much of it at that moment. My mother seemed nice and she would talk about my father unlike everyone else. I did not know then, about everything he had done and I was a curious child,' said Cassy. Her face dipped into a frown.

'Alphard stood up, I think. I cannot remember it clearly, but somewhere between the timer sounding and her reading to me he had stood and moved towards us. She did not like that at all.'

Cassy had suddenly been aware she was tucked under her mother's arm, hanging awkwardly as Jane swung around and darted behind the sofa and out of reach from Alphard. She was repositioned at her cry of distress and again Jane was muttering in her ear.

'Miss Lowe, please hand Cassy over. It is time for her to leave,' said Alphard gravely. 'She will be back.'

'Hand her over?' shrieked Jane. 'You think I can just hand her over to you? I don't know the first thing about you! You can't just have my little girl, I know all about your kind.'

'My kind?' repeated Alphard calmly.

'The Black family! Sirius told me some things, but I could see on his face that there was a lot more to it than that. You're a family of monsters and Sirius was the only light in it. Where has he gone now? Did you do away with him? You can't have our daughter,' hissed Jane. Her knees were bent as though ready to leap away if Alphard were to move at all. Her grip tightened painfully around Cassy.

'She shouted at him, cursed him and said she would not give me to a stranger. He just kept speaking to her calmly as though nothing was wrong until he managed to edge his way towards her. Then, I remember him touching my arm and she swung for him, cutting down the side of his face with her nails and there was a horrible scream from her,' said Cassy.

Harry stared in shock and asked, 'Why did Alphard not just stun her?'

'He didn't have his wand. Visitors were not allowed them in case they were taken away by a patient. Most of them were magical, my mother was the exception to that. I once asked why they did not erase her memory if it was something that drove her mad, but apparently it would be illegal because of her involvement in the magic community. She could not forget whatever realisation she had because she had me and you cannot make someone forget about their child justly,' explained Cassy soberly.

'In the end, the noise alerted the staff and they came in and stunned her. I don't really remember what happened in between and at the time I did not want to. I can remember looking back at her and she was on the floor sobbing. Her face was bloody, so I suppose Alphard had hit her at some point. He carried me out of the room and said that I was never coming back and that she had not improved at all. Deep down she was still unstable and I could hear her screaming even though the door was closed. She shouted that Alphard was a monster, that they were all monsters, and she shouted for me, begging them to give me back to her.

'Then, she said something that I did not really comprehend until I was older... she said that if my father had been there then he would have protected her, saved her from this madness and that he was the only one she could trust. She was then shouting for him, not me. I can still remember it clearly even now, only now I can't stand the thought of being so dependant on someone that I become what she was. To become so utterly vulnerable is something that I cannot do and I cannot tell you if I fear that or the madness I saw in her eyes that day more. I never want to become her, Harry.'

Silence followed. It was only when Harry was certain that Cassy had nothing else to say that he leant forward and rested a hand on her shoulder, smiling weakly although she would not look up from her hands to see it.

'You're stronger than that, you know you are and everyone else knows it too. You're not your mum, nor your dad,' he said, shaking her shoulder slightly.

Cassy let out a huff of attempted laughter and her face looked very grim as she turned towards the fire.

'She died nearly a year later. They said it was from grief. She was so upset that I never went back that she stopped eating properly and made her body weak, so when she caught an infection that winter it could not be fought off. Alphard sat me down and explained it all to me and... I am a horrible person for this, but I actually felt a little relieved at the time. I never wanted to go back to her again,' she said and only then did she look over to Harry. He met her eyes and squeezed her shoulder again.

'It's fine,' he said. 'It's fine.'

Okay, so a bit to run through, I reckon.

First, I hope that all made sense. Part of it was in Cassy's head and some she told to Harry. I thought this was the most effective way of providing enough information, while not giving Harry her life story.

With Jane (Janie, as Sirius called her in the Prologue) I wanted to write what I thought would be another angle of muggle reactions. You have the Dursleys with fear and hate, so I wanted one with fear and obsession, which I thought there would be too. The full version of everything is only known by Sirius, so this is just bits that Cassy knows and to be honest, I would not think she would know a whole lot. Alphard would not know the ins and outs and no one would think to tell a child that their mother is mad in strenuous detail.

My own mother is a nursing assistant in a mental health hospital and I hear things from her sometimes about her work. While their hospital is nothing like the one described here – I based it off a Victorian style along with my own thoughts – Jane's reaction is one that I hear of often. A lot of the patience there appear normal for a time before suddenly having 'episodes', where they become something else entirely. I hope it didn't read too strangely for anyone, but mental health rarely makes sense without the full story.

Also, I wanted to make the madness believable. I didn't want her to have completely lost her mind and be incomprehensible. To be exposed to a world where you truly have no power and knowing that you have to protect your child from the evils of that world would make anyone go on edge. Being alone with that would only make it worse. Janie snapped here because she knows the Blacks are not a nice family and she is fearful for Cassy. In reality, I think a lot of it would be justifiable on her behalf, but, of course, there is more to it than that!

Cassy's Boggart is born from this memory of her mother and is not related to one thing or the other. Sometimes, I believe, fears are complex and there are many things that children pick up on that adults would not. That fear can grow and become distorted as you get older. I hope that all makes sense. It probably doesn't read as traumatic as I want it to, but I've never tried to write a flashback scene before. I have how Sirius and Janie met all planned out, I knew that very early on when this entire story was still in my head, and I look forward to writing it eventually.

On another note, I hope no one found Harry too out of character. I always worry when I write him because he's hard to display any sort of strong emotion through. I either find he's angry, or he's neutral in the books, whereas I'm an emotive writer and like to say and display exactly how everyone feels.

Anyway, let me know what you think.

Thanks!