Ch.11

Being friends with someone you have a crush on isn't that bad actually. yeah, her giggle and smile and voice and ...okay yeah it drives me crazy. But, I get to hang out with her ...I had almost forgotten what it was like to have a friend..so..I'm happy , even if it can be a little hard.

I went to Cinnabon daily , I didn't even order sometimes..we just talked..he boss yelled at me a few times . We took the same breaks and talked over Chinese food or Pizza or whatever . And it was..nice .

"So..you wanna come to my birthday party? " She said

I almost forgot..she said her birthday was soon..a few days ago.."When is it ?"

"Tonight"

My eyes widened " Wait your birthday is today? Why didn't you tell me ?" I asked , complaining.

She laughed " Haha sorry! I forgot to mention it ! " She smiled at me " It's tonight at 8 at the bowling alley"

I chuckled "Bowling? Really Bonnie?"

She glared " For your information bowling is a serious sport "

I snickered " For your information 10 year olds have their parties at bowling allies "

She crossed her arms, ..god...stop being cute ...

"Well..what do you have in mind then?" she asked , still acting annoyed with me

I shrugged " I don't know ..go hit the clubs ..have some fun for once"

She looked like I told her to blow up a police station "Marceline! We are under age and I will not...get drunk and have "fun" with strangers! "

I stared at her and smiled " Geez Bon..you need to get away from those books..and I never said go get knocked up geez" I chuckled .." I was kidding by the way"

She uncrossed her arms.."oh...well...still!"

I smiled and she rolled her eyes.

"So are you coming or not?" She asked

I put down my bottle of Pepsi and looked at the table "um...er..I have kind of developed anxiety..."

Remember when I said I was a confident person?..yeah..well that was basically my sophomore year of Highschool...I was still with Simon..than Junior year came..and I had to move in with my dad ..I WAS confident..it is coming back ..now that I am living with good people and have a friend..but loosing Simon affected my connection with others..yeah I would still put on the confident mask...and I was still good with girls..but It kept getting harder and harder..I wanted my old self to come back..I went through a lot to get that confident in the first place though ..you know with my mom passing and the homeless thing..which sucked. I became a confident person through middle school and highschool...but senior year..I couldn't do it anymore..I began to be afraid of becoming attached to people..so I just wouldn't talk..and that led to anxiety problems...It is getting a lot better..and working at a mall has helped, plus deciding to talk to bonnie...but it's a party ...and a boring one...people I don't know will probably talk to me.. I would just put a shield up to protect myself...I still feel like I need it.

"I think that would be best ..If that's alright ?"

She was probably talking that whole time I was thinking cause I don't know what the heck she is talking about.

I looked at her , trying to look like I was listening " Oh! yeah It's fine ..yeah totally fine "

She raised an eyebrow "okay so I will see you at my place..at about 8?"

"Uhhh..yeah! um ..sounds good! " I said..surprised to hear she had changed her plans. "wait by myself?" I asked, slightly confused

"I knew you weren't listening" She sighed " I will have my party at my house from 5-7:30..than you can come over..I like you more than all of my other friends anyway.."

I blushed .." you do?"

She smiled " yeah I do " She pushed me lightly "you are like a hardcore softy and that is interesting to me" A small giggle escaped her mouth "and cute"

I pouted "hey! I..I'm not soft! "

She poked my nose, causing it to twitch.

"heh..yeah ya are..." She smiled . I could tell she wanted to do that again

She looked at her watch " I better get back to work..see ya later Marcy"

I blushed lightly and watched as she jogged back to her station.

I am really glad I had the confidence to talk to her...