-Chapter 11-

I sat on the couch thinking about what I had just said, "Being worlds apart" am I crazy? How am I to go six months without him, I know we have the bond between us but we are worlds from each other. I just can't get in the car and go to his place or call him on my cell. This is a true test of our commitment and our love to each other." I got up walked over to the patio doors opened them and went out on my deck. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, it was nothing like Lothlorien, the air didn't smell fresh, even the stars weren't as bright, I never heard the sweet melody of the trees either. I turned and went back in the house and locked the door behind me. I decided that there are two things I needed to do tonight, talk to my Aunt and Katara.

I sat on the couch opened my purse, took out my cell phone and called my Aunt.

"Hello?"

"Aunt Cloie, it's me Shashuwan, I…I need to talk with you tonight." I was trying very hard not to sound upset. But my heart was aching over Haldir.

"Shashuwan, what is wrong? You sound upset. Has something happened?"

"I…I can't talk about it right now, but I will be there in an hour, ok?"

"I'll be waiting for you."

"See you soon Aunt Cloie." I hung up the phone and then I called Katara.

"Hello?"

"Katara, it's me."

"Shash, hey girl, when did you get back? Are you feeling better?"

"I am not sure what you mean by better, Katara, my entire world has been turned upside down and other …things."

"You sound upset? What happened? Talk to me Shash or I am coming over right now!"

"Could you meet me at my Aunt Cloie's house please in an hour?"

"Now, it's after ten? Are you sure?"

"Yes, it has to be tonight, thank you. I have to go."

"Shash, can you at least tell me what it is about?"

"Not now. I'll tell you everything when you get there."

"Ok, I am getting dressed now, bye."

I hung up, went upstairs to pack a change of clothes and something to wear to bed in my overnight bag. I went back downstairs and pulled out my toiletries that I had taken with me and placed those in my overnight bag. I placed my purse and bag on the sofa and concentrated on Haldir. I closed my eyes and thought of him. I heard his voice, "Shashuwan? My love, open your eyes."

I opened my eyes and I was in Lothlorien again and before me was my love, "Is this real?"

He smiled, "Touch me and you will see."

I slowly walked towards him closing the space between us and laid my hand on his chest. When I did that and could tell that it was real, I threw my arms around him.

I pulled back and smiled, "But how is this possible? How did you do this?"

He smiled, "It is our bond that we have with each other that makes it possible."

"Our bond, I knew what we had was amazing but this is truly wonderful. You must think I am over reacting to us being apart?"

"No, why would I think that?"

"I have not felt anything from you my love. Are you hiding your true feelings from me?"

He gently took my hand and placed it over his heart, "I have been, I did not want you to worry about me but you can feel what I am."

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath and exhaled, I felt all his hurt and pain. "I am sorry, I didn't know but why would you hide it from me?"

"I wanted to be strong for you. The pain I was feeling when you left was something I have not felt for quite some time. I am sorry; I will not hide my heart from you again."

I smiled, "Nothing to be forgiven. You were protecting me. You don't have to hide your feelings from me, I need to feel them, ok?"

"I understand, my Shash. I must leave you now but if you need me, just think of me."

"I will. I love you Haldir."

"I love you, Shash." He pulled me into his arms, and we kissed and when I opened my eyes, I was in my home but I could still taste his lips on mine and his scent was all around me. I felt a little better after being with him; I picked up my purse, overnight bag, put my cell phone in my pocket and grabbed my keys off the coffee table. I opened the door to the garage, turned the light on and locked the door behind me. I got in my car and made sure all the doors were locked, buckled up, started my car and was on my way. While I was driving on the highway it seemed like every radio station was playing love songs, so I just settled for my favorite jazz station. I was hoping that it would help settle me but every song reminded of my love that I had to leave behind.

Shash, this is not like you to be so emotional but then I have never been in love like this before. What I feel for Haldir is so deep, so profound and then there is this bond that we share it is amazing. I almost missed my exit thinking about Haldir. I really have to get this under control for I have too much to accomplish in six months. When I exited the freeway I did not have too much further to go; a couple lefts then a right, my parent's house was the third house on the right. It was beautiful four bedroom brick house with a porch and an enclosed deck on the back. I pulled up in the driveway turned off my car and just sat there for minute just to collect my thoughts. The porch light came on automatically. I got out the car with my things, walked up the front stairs and let myself in.

"Aunt Cloie, I'm here." I walked into the living room on the left and there she sat sipping her tea reminding me of the elves in Lothlorien.

"Shashuwan, I have been waiting for you. How are you?"

I walked into the family room to join her and to figure out where to begin, I sat in the chair across from her.

"Shashuwan, what is wrong?"

"I have questions for you but I have to wait for Katara to get here so I won't have to repeat it again." We sat there talking about little things. Before long there was a knock at the door and I answered it.

"Shash, how are you?" We gave each other hugs, I was very happy to see her I was only worried about how she would react to all that I have to tell her.

I led her in to the family room where my Aunt sat waiting, "Katara, believe it or not I feel 100% better than when I left."

"That's great but you sounded so upset when you called and I can tell you've been crying. Why?"

I smiled at her, "Katara, please sit down and I will explain everything now that you are here." She sat in the chair across from Aunt Cleo and I sat next to my Aunt.

I took a deep breath and began, "I want to thank both of you for being here at this late hour. I would have waited until tomorrow, but I just couldn't stand not talking to you about what had happened. "I turned away from them trying calm my nervousness.

"Aunt Cloie, I am pretty sure that you know what I am going to say, don't you?"

She looked at me and smiled, "Yes, I do but please continue."

"When I left here two weeks ago, I never made it to the cabin, I went somewhere else."

Katara sat there with disbelief all over her face, "What do you mean, you went somewhere else?"

"Katara, I need for you to just listen to me because it is very hard for me to relive everything that I have been through because my heart is breaking. So please just listen." She nodded yes and listened.

"Like I said, I was not at the cabin for two weeks. As a matter of fact I was not in this world at all. I was taken to another time… another world. I was taken to a place called "Lothlorien" I know you must find this hard to believe but it is true. Lothlorien is beautiful. It has the tallest trees you have ever seen in your life and the skies are as blue as the oceans. The people that live there are beautiful, they are much like you and I but for one thing; their ears are curved like seashells. There was a storm of some sort, a tree branch fell and hit on my head I was out cold and that is where I was found in the woods by an elf that took me to his Lord and Lady. They took care of me and helped me heal. I ended up spending a lot of time with the one that found me and I fell in love him. His name is Haldir and he is amazing. He has long silver hair, his eyes are so blue they just hold your attention and his smile breathes life in to your soul. While I was there Haldir was wounded and he returned to me, I was his healer that was when I realized that I loved him. While there, I was told that my father was an elf, whom met my mother here in our time. Believe me, when the Lady Galadriel first tried to explain this to me, I was more than upset with all that I had heard. I did not want to believe it but the more that I heard I had no choice. I tried to make sense of it but I just couldn't I was even more confused and upset.

I did not return to Haldir afterward being told about my father. Instead I ran into the woods during a storm and took shelter in a hollowed out tree. When the storm ceased I left and tried to find my way back and was discovered by Haldir's brothers, Rumil and Orophin. They returned me to Haldir. I expected him to be upset but he was not. He was only concerned for my safety and wellbeing. It was then that I discovered how much this ma…elf meant to me. We confessed our love to each other and we knew we were destined to be together." I paused to catch my breath and didn't dare look up at my listener's faces. I was afraid what I might see there, so I plowed ahead.

"Shortly after that time he asked me to be his wife. I said yes. I know it seems like a very short time, and I have never believed in 'love at first sight', and it wasn't really like that in anyway. Even before we confessed our love to each other, we were connecting in some supernatural, spiritual way. We had our engagement ceremony the very next day. We have not made love yet, but I promised to return in six months and marry him. There is nothing on earth that is going to stand in my way of being with him. Being here without him is breaking my heart and nothing in this world matters to me more to than my life with him. But what I want to know Aunt Cloie," once I finally had the courage to lift my head, "is why did you not tell me of this when my parents died? Don't you think that knowing I am half elf was important to me? Why didn't you tell me!"

My Aunt was startled at the tone that I had taken with her, "Shashuwan Shane! It was not my responsibility to tell you! Your parents had made up their minds that the "Lady of Light" was to tell you if they could not."

"But you could have told me something! Do you have any idea how long I have suspected that there was something missing from my life? You knew this, I have told you this but yet you sat by and said nothing!"

"Shashuwan, like I said it was not for me to tell you! I have something that your father told me to give you if something were to ever happen to him it may help you, I will give it to you now." She left the room and I sat on the sofa in total exhaustion. Katara sat there looking at me shaking her head in disbelief.

"Shash, I..I don't know what to say all this is so unbelievable. But I think you need more time to think before you marry this so called Haldir, maybe you hit your head so hard that it was all just a dream?"

I shot her a look that could have killed. "What? A dream, are you serious? This is real Katara! Look!" I held out my left hand with my engagement ring, I then pulled out the little sachet and gently pulled out the lock of hair that he had given me. "This is his hair, touch it. Now smell it! This is him. He is as real, as I am talking to you right now, so don't sit there and tell me that I dreamed it all up. Ok?"

Katara sat there and gently reached out and touched his lock of hair. "Shashuwan, forgive me, it is just so hard for me to believe. It just sounds so crazy especially for you! You are a woman of science and quite pragmatic about things. You write grants, perform surgery and you have been like a sister to me for so long. " She was staring at my necklace. "Did the necklace come from him?"

"Yes, he gave it to me, as a gift to the woman he loves and as a symbol of our bond to one another. It glows when his thoughts are with me."

She stood and stepped towards me, she gently ran her finger along the chain, "It's beautiful. I have never seen anything like it before. Shash, you have to understand this is just very hard for me to believe."

My Aunt returned and placed the box on the sofa, I sat down next to it before I opened it I had to ask my Aunt something. "Aunt Cloie, why is it Katara and I have never seen you for what you really are? I mean right now I am looking at you and you are beautiful just like your kin, why can't Katara see you?"

Katara looked at her then me, "What do you mean? See her for what she really is? She is Aunt Cloie, isn't she?" Aunt Cloie walked towards Katara,

"Katara people here on earth see what they want to see. Please close your eyes." Katara, did as she was told, my aunt passed her hand over eyes and said something in elvish. "Now Katara open your eyes and see me."

Katara opened her eyes and almost fell backing away from her, "Your…your ears are pointed! What are you?"

"I am an elf from Rivendell. I was sent to be with her father and mother to help them raise Shash.

Katara eyes widen, "So Shash, you are an elf also?"

"I am peredhil, half-elf, Katara. It seems that my father was a full blooded elf from Rivendell and my mom was human.

"I need to sit down and take all of this in, this is too much." She, Aunt Cloie and I sat as I opened the box that my Aunt had given me. I was amazed by what I discovered inside the box.

"Aunt Cloie, these are my father's swords, daggers and clothing, I said, looking at them reverently. "Lady Galadriel had shown me a vision of what my father as an elf he was very handsome. Katara, you have to see this." She looked and could not say a word. She knelt in front of the box in amazement. Katara's hands shook as she reached out and ran her fingers lightly over the objects inside the box. She sat back on her heels and tried to take in some deep calming breathes. I could tell she was pretty overwhelmed, but I had more to tell her. This was the night for revelation and truth.

"Aunt Cloie, I need to talk with Katara alone. She has to hear the rest of what I must say. I have waited too long and it can wait no longer."

"Shashuwan are you sure you want to tell her now? It could be too much for her. Do you really want to do that now?"

"What do you mean tell me the rest? What more can there be Shash?"

"Aunt Cloie please, leave us." With a concerned backward glance, Aunt Cloie left the room and now it was just I and my dear friend.

"Katara, I have something to tell you that I should have told you almost seven months ago and I know that you will be upset with me. You may not even want to be bothered with me anymorebut I trust in our friendship and love for each other that we won't lose what we have," I told her anxiously.

"Shash, we are sisters and that will never change so please tell me what has been bothering you all these months?"

I took a deep breath and sat on the sofa across from her, "Katara do you remember when James came in town and you had to leave, so I looked out for him. Remember that?"

"Yes, I do. Why?"

"That evening when I got off work I called and asked James if he would like to go to dinner with me. He said yes, so that is what we did. I picked him up and we went to Mitchells. We had a great time talking about growing up together and everything. Afterwards we went to a club so I could meet some of his friends and had a couple drinks. I noticed that he was drinking a little too much so I told him that I needed to get him home, so I could take care of some work there. I took him to your place and made sure your fish were fed. I didn't want him to forget to take care of them. Well, I picked up my purse and got ready to leave."

I tried taking slow deep breathes and I was fiddling with my ring, turning it around and around in my anxiety and fear. "Shash are you alright?" She was very concerned about me.

"Katara, I am fine just give me a minute, ok?"

"My love, you don't have to do this now."

"Haldir, I must, I will be fine."

I felt his smile surround me, "Haldir, just stay with me, please?"

"I am always here for you.

"I am sorry Katara; I can try to finish now." I swallowed nervously, but continued, "I opened the door to leave and he came up behind me and pushed it shut. It shocked me and when I turned to face him, he pushed me against the wall and started kissing me. I pushed him away and said "James, stop it I don't feel that way about you, you are like a brother to me!"

Katara stood up and was very upset, "Shash, are you trying to tell me that my brother attacked you or that he raped you?"

"Yes he did, he raped and beat me! He took from me what was not his to take and he beat me like I was a dog in the street, Katara!"

I could feel Haldir's rage, "Haldir please don't be upset, not now."

She gave me a look that I had never experienced from her before. "James would never do that to you. I know that he loves you like a sister Shash, you are wrong! Maybe it was you who had too much to drink and you blacked out or something. James isn't like that!" she responded with tears in her eyes.

"Shashuwan, I am here. I have not left you."

I was unzipping my pants a bit and un-tucked my shirt to show her the scars, "Do you remember the belt that you and I bought James for Christmas last year the one with the letter "J" on it?" I turned my back to show her, "Here is my evidence do you believe me now!"

I heard her take a deep breath, "Oh my God! No! Tell me he didn't do this, tell me!"

She grabbed me by the upper arms making me face her and tried to shake "the truth" out of me. I felt my love's anger swell up inside of him. Katara's arms fell heavily to her sides and I looked at her.

"He did. And dear God, I wish it weren't real, but it is. I am sorry that I waited to tell you, but I did not want to hurt you, I was thinking of you! We are sisters. I didn't want to tear your world apart like James did to mine. Katara, you have to believe me! I would never lie to you." The tears were coursing down my cheeks and my nose was stuffed. I felt so miserable bringing this thingto light. But I had to. I learned from Haldir to face the "demons" that hid in the darkness. They can not stand against the truth. I know that now."

I felt Haldir's smile and his love surround me, "So you did listen to me, I told you, you could do this, Shash. I am so proud of you."

She was upset and crying, "Well, I still don't believe you, Shash! You are lying and I will prove it!"

"Katara, I have no reason to lie!Go to the Police Department and ask for the Detective handling my case. He will show you the file and everything. Katara, I swear to you I am not lying. Did you think I wanted to tell you this? No, I didn't. I wanted to protect you!"

Katara, stopped and just stood there like she was thinking about something, then she looked at me, "Is that why the police have been…No, you are a liar and I will prove it to you once and for all!" She stormed pass me, slamming the door behind her and never looked back. I ran after her to stop her but she got in her car and left.

"Katara, Please stop you can't tell…. You can't tell James you know." I stood there not knowing what to do.

Aunt Cloie called out for me. "Shashuwan, come in you need to rest." She tried to talk to me and calm me down from the rollercoaster of emotion that I have been on for the last hour.

I turned and looked at her with tears in my eyes. "It's my fault she is so upset, I should have told her when it happened. I don't blame her if she wants nothing to do with me," I shook my head filled with self-recrimination.

"Shash, you have nothing to feel sorry about, yes you should have told her but it was a horrible experience for you. Do not doubt what you have done." I felt his love but what I needed was to have him close tonight, I was exhausted and hurt. I just needed to feel his arms around me.

I went inside gathered my things my things to go to bed and sat down feeling exhausted. While I was sitting there Aunt Cloie sat next to me and placed my hands in hers.

"Shashuwan, look at me." Slowly I raised my head to look at her.

"I understand why you could not tell her earlier and I am sure she will come to understand. She just needs time, what about the threat James made against your life have you told her? I bet Katara will go and ask him. There is no way around that. She's going to be looking for the truth and she will have to confront her brother. After all, she loves both of you and doesn't believe this horror could be possible. Does Haldir even know that James threatened your life?"

"No, Haldir does not know. I have kept those thoughts locked away in the back of my mind. But he knows now and I am sure I will have to deal with him soon."

"Shashuwan, you did not tell him? Why not? Why would you hide this from him? He has promised to protect you always, how do you think this will make him feel?"

"Aunt Cloie, please stop I can't handle this not tonight, ok?"

"Shashuwan, you will have to deal with this, if not tonight, then another time."

"Alright, Aunt Cloie I hear you but right now I am going to bed, I am exhausted and I desperately wish he were here with me right now."

"So, what are you going to do about James? You know how he is, he never forgets! And when he says he is going to do something, he is true to his word!"

. "I can handle James; he is not the man that I once thought he was anymore. I will never be so vulnerable again!"

"Shash, you have to give Katara time deal with everything you have told her tonight, you have to admit you did tell her a lot and I understand why you did. The love of your life is waiting for you and nothing should get in your way of that."

"You understand? Aunt Cloie, I love him so much and leaving him was the worst feeling in the world."

"I know, Shash. Look, I know you're exhausted. Leave your father's things on the sofa and go get some rest." She kissed me on my forehead, "You will always be my little Shash. Would you like your favorite breakfast in the morning?"

My face lit up, "You mean banana pecan pancakes with your homemade syrup? You always knew how to make me feel better. Thank you, Aunt Cloie," I told her as I gave her a good night hug.

I collected my bag and went upstairs to my parent's bedroom, usually I would stay in my old room but I needed to be close to my parents so I slept in their bedroom tonight. I changed into my bed clothes and went to bed. I laid there and felt perfectly safe but I stilled missed my love dearly. I closed my eyes and all I could see was him, I curled up in a ball and cried myself to sleep. My dreams were only of Haldir which I expected, but sometimes they seemed so real. While I slept I felt his arms around me, "Haldir, our bond is growing you feel so real?"

"My love, I am here because you need me." I opened my eyes and there he was in bed with me.

"Yes I need you, but I did not think you would actually come."

He smiled, "You will be wife. I may be protector of Lorien's borders but your well-being is all ways my concern and my duty as your husband is to protect you."

"I need you, please hold me!" I was so upset, I was bordering on a breakdown. He lay back on the pillow and pulled me in his arms while all of what I went through poured out in my tears. After my tears were spent I sat up and looked him, "Haldir, I am sorry I did not tell you about the threat…" He placed his finger on lips to quiet me.

"Shash, I understand why you did not tell me and also understand why you must confront him on your own but it does not mean that I approve of you not telling me. There is nothing in your world or in mine that I would not do to protect you, I love you. Shash, I will kill to protect you and our family. So, when you confront him I will be there. I promise you, on my life, he will not harm you again. I swear it." He kissed me and pulled me to him so, I could sleep. His arms, felt strong and a peaceful spirit wrapped around me like a cloak and I finally fell asleep with no worries.