Heaven Help Us
By
xXx MissHaun†ed-MoonLigh† xXx

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Disclaimer: I still, still, still, still, still, still, still, still, still, still own nothing …

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Hi! Not too long of a wait. And this week's my own so I'll probably be able to update again before I'm back at school next week. Still, we'll see, yeah? Not promising anything … just feeling relatively hopeful …

Bit of light-heartedness in last chapter … no such luxury with this one, I'm afraid. My Muse is feeling depressed … (Sigh)

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You don't know a thing about my sins,
How the misery begins.
You don't know,
So I'm burning, I'm burning

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The mood had considerably lightened over the past few minutes, mainly thanks to Paige's genius alone.

Even cranky, she could pull an amazingly simple solution out of nowhere.

For which Piper was immensely grateful.

But the minutes were passing by.

Trickling passed as though falling through a gigantic hourglass, the grains of time hitting the base with deafening crashes, one by one.

Second by second.

Minute after minute.

And Chris' mood, though far from brilliant even with his Aunts in the room, was beginning to worsen.

She could sense his inner turmoil, feel his despairing desire to leave them, to go home.

And Piper was beginning to hate herself for denying him of his wish.

He didn't want to stay with them.

And that knowledge alone hurt so much that as the minutes continued to pass by in silence, her occasional glance at either Leo or Chris procuring no speech from her speechless throat, she was becoming increasingly less obliged to remain in the same room as him.

She couldn't take his pain.

Not as a mother.

No mother should ever have to feel their child hurting so much.

No child should ever be hurting so much, period.

It just wasn't fair …

"Damnit, I can't take this!"

Jumping slightly and blinking, Piper glanced up to see Chris running an irritated hand through his hair.

'He needs a hair cut,' Piper mused vaguely, before her eyes sought out his and her heart ached at the look of abject desperation that was adorning his worn and weathered features.

"Why can't you just accept it? Why can't you just let me go home?" he asked of her, rising from his seated position against the pedestal and wandering aimlessly to the window, his back resolutely to them.

The storm was moving in, he realised, catching sight of a blackened cloud hanging sheepishly over the street.

Yet he still refused to quench his uncontrollable emotions.

He couldn't.

The anger, the fear, the aching, burning, searing love towards his parents and yet hatred of them for keeping him here at the same time … they were eating away at his insides.

Eating away at them so vigorously he wanted to scream.

But he couldn't.

So the storm raged on, his only available outlet against the blitz of emotions inside his chest.

Inside his very soul.

"Chris, we need you," Piper replied softly, her watery tears threatening to spill over her pale cheeks.

Brushing at her eyes roughly, she forced them back.

Chris laughed hollowly, the sound eerie and unnatural as the tense atmosphere became almost suffocating.

Shuddering, Piper shared an anxious glance with Leo, who was yet to contribute to their fast becoming heated argument.

Damn Pacifists ...

"Me? Needed? Don't think so, somehow," Chris shot back, eyes downcast.

"But you are," Piper insisted, jumping to her feet at last, abandoning the old couch and taking a tentative couple of steps towards her hurting son.

The sounds of crying echoed up towards them from the first floor, and Chris sighed heavily.

"Oh Hell," Leo murmured, staring at Piper apologetically.

Piper, in turn, stared at the doorway, sorely tempted to run to the aid of her young eldest.

After all, she could probably look at baby Wyatt without hating herself …

"I'll be right back."

Oh.

Too late.

Leo had beaten her to it.

A second later, the jingling sound of orbs offset the illuminating blue and white lights that lit up the room briefly, before they filtered out of existence.

And Leo was gone.

'Coward,' Chris thought spitefully, shaking his head.

Some things would never change …

And the same could be said for Piper's stubbornness.

For Chris was more than fully aware that despite how much she may blame herself for his desire to go, and despite how much she may hate herself for refusing to let him leave, she still wasn't going to back down.

Not even a tiny bit.

Her resolutions were set, and they'd been set in stone.

Chris was screwed …

"And what about him, Chris?" Piper asked, snapping him out of his spiralling thoughts.

"What about who?" he asked back, still refusing to look at her.

If he didn't look at her, he'd be fine … right?

If he didn't look at her ... he could handle this.

"Wyatt. Your brother, Chris! Remember him?"

Chris snorted.

"Well, when he's left his mark on you on countless occasions, marks so distinctive that they could sicken even a masochist's sadistic mind, I think it's safe for you to say he's a pretty hard person to forget."

Piper's breath hitched, but not a sound escaped her lips.

Instead, her tones softer this time as she stared at his shivering back in concern, she asked softly, "can you really give up on him? Can you really leave now, knowing you haven't changed anything?"

Chris sighed.

"You'd take care of him."

But he didn't sound entirely convinced.

Piper raised her eyebrows.

"Who says we will? If you leave, why should I pick up the pieces?"

"He's your son!" Chris replied, tones incredulous. She wasn't really suggesting what he thought she was … was she?

"He's your brother," she retorted, eyes gleaming. "If you decide to go without completing your 'mission', I don't see why it should be left to us to finish it for you."

Chris turned on his heel, finally angry enough to stare directly at her.

As the anger helped him to forget how hard it was to face her.

Feeling fury bubbling beneath his veins, he narrowed his eyes, ignoring the sweeping cold that was beginning to blanket his weakened body.

"So you're saying … that you'd willingly let the future fall to pieces just to prove a point?!" he demanded of her, shaking with rage as well as cold now.

Internally horrified, Piper's expression remained passive.

"If needs be," she said firmly. "So if you really want the future to improve, you're just going to have to stick around and accomplish it yourself, aren't you?"

Chris was speechless.

She'd readily sacrifice her Twice Blessed just to get back at him … She'd readily sacrifice the entire future just to prove a point …

"That's low," he murmured, eyes blazing. "That's really low, Piper."

Piper couldn't help it that time.

The gasp escaped her.

As did the horror that was soon welling like wildfire within her auburn orbs.

'That's really low, Piper.'

'… Piper …'

'… Piper! …'

Struggling to regain her lost composure, feeling her heart shattering to dust beneath her ribs, she ignored the welling tears and turned away.

"Yeah, well …" she mumbled, but fell stonily silent, suddenly at a loss for what to say.

Chris sighed too, turning his back on her and slapping a hand against his forehead.

Damnit, why did he always do it?

What in the name of Hell had possessed him? What made him say that?!

"I'm sorry … mom …" he whispered, studying the clouds that were rolling in as his desire to run over and hug her, to apologise a thousand times and then a thousand times more became somewhat overwhelming.

Piper said nothing.

She wandered back over to the couch and sank into it, overbearingly exhausted, all of a sudden. With another heavy sigh, she sat with her head resting on her hands, her elbows sitting precariously atop her drawn up knees, and stared off into space.

Chris shook his head, refusing to submit …

Because if he gave in … if he went over to comfort her … he'd never be able to get away from here.

Instead, he watched as the first smidgens of rain began their horrendous descent from the blackened heavens.

His powers were well and truly out of control, now.

He wouldn't be able to pull them back even if he'd wanted to …

"Look, I know you hate it here, but is it really necessary for you to destroy the city before you go?"

Chris gasped, clenching his fists and finally tearing his gaze from the pounding droplets of rain that were slamming hard against the Attic window.

With bated breath, he stared at his mother through tormented eyes.

"What?" he asked, voice barely above a croaked whisper.

"You heard," she replied monotonously, absently contemplating the far wall.

… …

Chris was thrown.

Had she … had she just caved?

Was she willing to let him go?!

"Mom -"

But his confusion was short lived when a moment later, she climbed dejectedly to her feet and left the Attic.

Chris stood, motionless, staring at the wide-open doorway, not quite sure as to what had just happened.

A moment later, she was back, only this time holding the Book in her arms.

With a soft sniffle, she placed it delicately upon its stand and began flicking through the pages, her melancholy mood unwittingly infectious.

Chris felt the tears pricking at his eyes, but was still unsure as to what was going on.

Outside the window, the harsh storm was dying down ever so slightly, mere minutes after springing into life.

Oh.

It seemed he did still have a little control over his emotions ...

The howling wind had quietened down a little, and the rain wasn't pummelling the windows any more.

Piper glanced up as a sudden hush fell over the Attic, momentarily surprised by the lack of raging-weather sounds.

With a small smile, she spotted Chris' slightly calmer expression, his hands no longer clenched and tears of his own springing into his eyes.

Choking back a sob, she returned her attention to the Book.

"Is that the Spell?" she asked sadly after a few silent minutes, voice unsteady.

Chris remained still for a moment, half-delighted, half-horrified that she was even asking that question.

And the answer he finally did give was not what Piper had expected.

"I can't believe you're doing this to me."

Piper turned from the Book and stared at him, their eyes locking for the first time in hours.

Breath momentarily stolen, she hardly noticed Leo's return until his footfalls against the oak-wood floor grabbed her attention.

"Sorry,"he said, walking over to the couch. "Wyatt thought it'd be fun to chuck Mr Tibbs across the room. Wasn't so funny when he couldn't get the thing back, though."

At the stunned silence that greeted his words, Leo felt suddenly uncomfortable.

Much to his surprise, neither his wife nor his son decided to reply to him.

"You can't believe I'm doing what to you?" Piper whispered, her gaze piercing and strong, despite her quivering will.

Chris considered her face, shaking his head a fraction.

"Just when I think I can do this, just when I think my mind's made up, you go and tip everything skywards."

Piper flinched.

Chris wasn't shouting. But she wished he was.

No, he was speaking. Normally.

His voice eerily, freakily calm.

"It's not just the fact that you guys don't trust me. 'Cause … well, I get that. Really, I do. I've messed up so many times it's no wonder you don't. But … even when I'm offering you the chance to get rid of me at last, you go and play the guilt card and suddenly I'm made out to be the bad guy."

Piper was stunned.

"Who said anything about you being the bad guy?" she asked, stumped.

Chris shrugged.

"Hey, if the glove fits," he replied, shaking his head. "I've been called so many things during my life. 'Bad guy's probably one of the nicer things."

Leo gasped, but said nothing, still a little confused after walking into this half way through the conversation.

Piper, however, was glaring at Chris now.

"Chris, I'm not playing 'the guilt card'. You said you want to go home and I'm just helping you out. What the Hell's with the sudden change of heart?"

Chris stared at her suspiciously.

"That card's two-faced. I can ask you the same thing. Why are you suddenly so ready to get rid of me?"

Piper's anger was mounting.

"Well, I don't see why it's such a big problem all of a sudden, Chris! You wanted to leave a moment ago!"

Glaring, Chris remained silent, unable to think of a suitable come back to that.

'Like mother like son,' Leo mused sadly.

Sitting at the sidelines, watching with an air of apprehension, he was almost sure he should intervene before one of them said something they'd regret … but he didn't have a clue how best to do that.

Not when the two arguing were his wife and his youngest son.

One of them would take his intrusion the wrong way.

Being so similar in their stubbornness and their attitudes, one of them would think he'd sided with the other on purpose.

And Leo couldn't shove that on top, not when Chris was so close to the edge, right now.

So he simply sat there.

Silently watching.

Chris' eyes were riveted to his mother now, his heart burning beneath his chest.

The tears leaking beyond his notice, he shuddered, wrapping his arms around his chest and rubbing vigorously at his arms, trying to insert even the tiniest amount of heat into his frozen limbs.

"You want me to leave."

It wasn't a question.

Piper blinked but held her gaze.

"No. No, I don't. And I can't believe I'm even considering this … but I can't handle the thought that you could hate me even more for keeping you here against your wishes on top of everything else I've done."

Silence.

Chris stared at her, gobsmacked.

"Wait … what?"

But Piper pressed on.

"You don't feel comfortable here. I get it. Really I do," she added, smiling faintly before it vanished from existence as quickly as it had appeared. "And if being here isn't helping, if you can't stand to be around as after what we've done … well, I guess I'm just gonna have to deal with it."

Both Chris and Leo were staring at her as though she'd just sprouted another head.

"What do you mean 'what you've done'?" Chris murmured, eyes wide as saucers. "You haven't done anything wrong! How could you even think that?"

"Look at the way we've treated you, Chris! What kind of mother can't even recognise her own son when she sees him?"

"Mom … you didn't know because I didn't tell you! I didn't want you to know! What you guys did … I brought it all on myself, trust me. And besides, it made things easier in a way."

Piper frowned.

"How? How can being treated like that ever help?" she asked of him, hardly daring to believe it. How could he stand there and dismiss everything they'd done? All the things they'd said?

He half-smiled, finally blinking and dropping his gaze.

"It helped because … well, I could pretend … just for a bit I could imagine you weren't … y'know, you."

Confused, Piper remained silent, mutely thankful for the squeeze of the shoulder that came a second later, as Leo finally came to her aid.

Standing side by side, they waited, hardly breathing.

"Why wouldn't you want me to be me, Chris?" she asked softly.

She was nervous.

She didn't know why, but she was feeling unbelievably nervous, now. Surely Chris wasn't about to give something away …

He wouldn't give up on his 'Future Consequences' …

Surely not … ?!

Chris sighed heavily, the tears leaking against his wishes.

His voice trembling, he fixed her with a piercing, heart-filled stare, the shivers becoming stronger.

With words so soft they were almost lost to the dulling howl of the diminishing winds, he murmured sadly, "I ... I don't want you to be you because … you're dead."

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Wow … (insert vigorous ear cleaning moment) … Did Chris really just give something away? It's the Apocalypse! Run, people!

Ahem …

So Leo's not the only one to know the truth, now. Wonder how Piper's gonna take this latest bombshell ... (Grins wickedly)

Thanksies to peppymint, dgeo98, Soraya, aerohead1980, piperloveleoalways, xcharmedgrl4evax, DimpleBulbo, forestwife, criminally charmed, Pandora of Ithilien, Plutobaby494, Marcus1233, DejaVu86, lizardmomma, HPSmallCharm29, onesmartgoalie, Za Webmaster Authoress, charmedgrl4ever, Twilight in my Eyes, Fae Child19, History Buff 1990 and Secret Thought!

Y'all rock! More up soon!

Oh, and just so's you know ...
Reviews are shiny!

Hugs,
xXx MissHaun†ed-MoonLigh† xXx