Crude Irony

It's been ages since my last update. I'm sorry for the delay. Junior Year really is the hardest year of High School. Thanks to my wonderful readers, reviewers, and those who have this story on their Alerts list.

Last chapter left off with Mierra kissing James in front of Lily after their Quidditch game.

Crude Irony

Chapt 11 – Locked In

Christmas Day was drawing closer, and the presents had begun to pile up under the extravagant tree. Though the streets were howling with reckless wind and falling snow, the walls of the Evans' home carried the warmth emanating from the frequently lit fireplace. Sirius had taken to his usual custom of singing Christmas carols, more than often following Petunia around whenever she entered the room. Vernon's visits had decreased dramatically after his brawl with James; Petunia would go to his house instead whenever she was not required to spend time with her family. Mr. and Mrs. Evans were often out of the house finishing up whatever work was required of them before the holidays, so Petunia was barely ever around to dampen the mood.

However, even in the presence of such a cheerful atmosphere, melancholy still lurked around James and Lily. Mierra had stopped paying visits to the Evanses. Whether this was of her own accord or Lily's doing, James did not know. However, her absence did little to amend the damage she inadvertently caused.

Lily had turned a cold shoulder toward James. She would not even waste time to argue with him when he made a stupid remark, let alone glance at him when they crossed each other in the hall. He was sad to say it, but the absence of her frequent scowls and constant bickering penetrated him more deeply than any blade could have.

"Evans!" he bellowed, knocking obstinately on her bedroom door in response to the ongoing blaring of her alarm clock. "Evans, knock it off! You've abused me enough, can't you give me a break already?"

Of course, above all else, she could never pass up the chance to get back at him when the opportunity presented itself. Agitatedly, he tried opening the door again, but it was locked.

"How about you just get a mountain troll next time? Maybe if it sits on you—"

He was cut off by a thud that could only be associated with Lily's pillow making contact with the door. The idea of blasting his way into the room seemed very tempting, but James was sure her alarm clock was a lot heavier than it looked and he had no doubt she'd be throwing that next. He sighed in defeat and allowed his head to rest on the wooden barrier that locked him out.

It had been the perfect opportunity to get closer to her. It was just his luck that Mierra decided to come along as well.

"Lily, come on . . . it isn't my fault. She came onto me. It's not like I wanted it to happen. But of course, with my being irresistible and all, it's only natura— ouch!"

James removed his forehead from the door as Lily undoubtedly punched it from the other side. Then, just as quickly, it flew open, and she stepped over the threshold, eyes narrowed with distaste.

"I'm sorry, but are you under the impression that I'm bothered by your little episode with Mierra?"

She put a different stress on the girl's name, and James found himself mentally noting to avoid the two when they coincided back at Hogwarts.

Lily walked coolly past him without another word, her once beautiful face sunken by the sullen attitude that plagued her. There wasn't a doubt in James' mind that she was deeply bothered by what happened. Despite the melancholy attitude, however, James couldn't help but crack a wide grin as he watched her walk away, disheveled crimson locks bouncing as her pace increased. Truth be told, it didn't matter if she knocked him out cold on the spot, as long as she was finally acknowledging his existence.

"So what is it that's making you act as if you've got a leech crawling up your arse?"

A lock of Lily's thick hair whipped him in the face when she spun around and —

SMACK!

Of all the times she had retaliated, he had never been struck with enough force to actually end up looking in a completely new direction. The sudden jerk also had consequences on his neck, which remained sore until the evening.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mr. Evans returned home that night looking very disgruntled, only to leave an hour later with stumbling words — one of which James and Sirius had grown used to hearing: "Office."

The house, much to James' liking, had been void of much parental supervision, and so the two Marauders were able to exercise their magic at will. Petunia had made it a habit to disappear whenever that happened.

Tonight was no different. The door slammed behind her skeletal form as she made her way out into the dark, rainy driveway. An awkward silence settled as soon as the roars of wind from outside had been muted.

James was seated on the couch, staring fixedly at the dancing flames as they painted images in the dark glass of the window, only occasionally perturbed by lightning.

Lily had intentionally isolated herself in the dining room upon making eye contact with James. He didn't dare follow her. What she needed was time alone to think the situation over and realize he hadn't been at fault.

Despite whatever she said, James knew perfectly well that it was Mierra's kiss that speared her spirits. He wanted above all else to turn back time and go back to a few moments before that. He knew Lily never really hated him as much as she had claimed. She wouldn't waste her breath arguing so frequently if she did. Of course, it didn't mean he was one of her closest friends, but there was something beyond that seemingly impenetrable surface that she failed to fully conceal. Despite all the remarks and all the irony, there was something that James saw beyond her cold gaze that made him feel as if he was a piece of her life that she would not liked to have lost.

Only recently did that hidden something escape her — that one night, when she was in his room, worry masking her otherwise lively, emerald eyes.

He heard someone's approaching footsteps and tore his dazed eyes away from the languorous window with difficulty. After blinking several times, he was finally able to make out Sirius' distinctly handsome features.

"What is it?" he asked

"Just thought I'd let you know that I spoke to Lily on your behalf," he said, taking a seat next to his friend. "I fed her some rubbish about how scoring the winning goal just got Mierra excited and all that, and that Evans' senseless jealousy was making her ignorant to the fact that you didn't kiss Mierra back."

A rush of gratitude spread through James as he grinned for the first time since the morning.

"And did she throw knives at you?"

Sirius let out a laugh at his friend's remark and replied, "That privilege is reserved for you, and you alone, Prongs."

"I'm honored," James commented sarcastically. "So what did she throw if not knives?"

Sirius remained silent and in thought. He seemed to be trying to formulate how and what to say next.

It was at this point that James felt his heart sink to his stomach and the heat rise in his face. Whatever Sirius was going to say next didn't seem like something James would want to hear.

Finally, his friend looked up. His usual childish malevolence was not present in those cold, gray eyes he had inherited from his mother. His lips parted to speak, and the word that escaped them was not one that James was expecting to hear.

"Tears."

The flash of lightning outside only emphasized the gravity that accompanied the image of a lonely Lily, crying because of him. Feeling at his worst, he sank lower into the couch and rested his head on his clenched hand.

"She's crying . . . and it's because of me."

"It's not because of you. It's because of her," Sirius consoled. James refrained himself from asking if the love of his life was currently PMSing, knowing for a fact that if the words escaped the living room, his head would be on display somewhere other than his body.

"Don't tell her I'm spilling this out to you," Sirius continued, glancing around to make sure he wasn't heard by anyone else, "but Mierra confessed to her at the beginning of the trip that she had begun developing feelings for you again."

"I had no idea," James intervened irritably. Sirius disregarded the sarcasm.

"I don't think I should betray her trust so indifferently, so I won't go too into it, but Lily's begun to see you more as a friend than a rival lately. Of course, out of respect for Mierra, she never let it show for fear that it would encourage you to continue flirting with her."

"I've spent four and a half years trying to get her to like me … and when she finally starts to feel something other than hatred, she squashes it because of Mierra's feelings?" James clarified, disliking his ex-girlfriend more and more.

"Which is why what Mierra did to you a few days ago got to her so much. It was—" (he formed quotation marks with his fingers) "—insensitive."

But why would she care? James found himself asking. Wasn't Lily holding back so that Mierra could get her chance?

Sirius seemed to know what was going on in James's mind and, for some reason, tried to dodge the question by making his leave. James, however, stopped him before he could get too far.

"It's not just friendship she was starting to feel was it?" he asked. His famous lopsided smirk accompanied his speculation and Sirius couldn't help but smile back.

"Don't get cocky," he reprimanded lightheartedly. And before James could interrogate him further, he was already heading upstairs.

Several minutes later, Lily emerged from the dining room, proof of tears evident in her red eyes and cheeks. She seemed to have attempted to wash her face clean of any traces, but was unsuccessful. James stood up from the couch to acknowledge her and was surprised to see her jump in shock; clearly she had been waiting until he was upstairs and came out a little too early.

Of course, James would've stayed the whole night downstairs if he'd had to until he ran into her.

"Evans . . . are you all right?"

It was said in the most sincere way he could muster, but his efforts went unrecognized. Lily was determined to avoid speaking to him. She was already sprinting up the stairs by the time he finished. Taken aback and slightly offended by her abrupt departure, he dashed after her.

"Evans, talk to me!" he said, though it was more of a command than a request.

"Good night, Potter," Lily said somewhat more feebly than usual, but James stuck his arm between the door to keep her from locking him out again. Of course, he realized a millisecond later that it wouldn't have stopped her.

However, this time, it did.

She gasped before she could slam it shut on him and held back, giving him a chance to open it again and step forward. Lily reacted at once by pulling her wand out of her pocket. Unfortunately for her, James was swifter and managed to cast Expelliarmus before a hex even came to mind. Her wand flew neatly into his hand and he put both his and hers on her dresser.

"No magic," he said. "I'm not here to fight with you."

"Get out," Lily demanded, but she struggled in saying it. James felt another wave of guilt strike him. She was about to start crying again.

"Lily," he tried a little more softly, ". . . are you feeling okay?"

Idiot.

That was all he could say? She was ready to break down again and he asked her if she was okay?

But Lily didn't seem to think it was stupid at all. Her breathing (which James had noticed was becoming an arduous task for her) slowed down slightly.

"W-What?"

James was taken aback by this more than she was. Had he just said something right?

"Er. . . I noticed you've been really down lately. And what I said to you earlier was insensitive. I shouldn't have assumed that you were mad at Mierra for what happened."

He was careful with his words, having finally caught her full attention. Lily remained calm, giving him the cue to go on.

"But, I know for a fact that you're upset with me about something, and I have no idea why," he said, sensing that his five seconds of being on her good side were about to come to an abrupt end.

Lily's expression hardened for a split second, in which she was staring at the wall over James's right shoulder. Then immediately after, a look he had never seen on her took hold of her features — guilt.

Now was the time to ask if she was feeling all right. . .

"You're wrong," Lily whispered, again struggling with her speech as she tried to keep the tears from earlier repressed.

She failed; one by one, they began falling again. Despite the fact that they were in complete darkness, James was able to see something was wrong. She must've felt terrible to have cried so much in one night.

Lily Evans never cried . . . or at least, James had never imagined seeing her doing so. Any image of her would always be that of a strong, impenetrable (yet inwardly gentle) girl. She rarely ever showed a sensitive side.

And now here she was, crying for the first time in front of James Potter.

He wanted so badly to leave . . . to apologize for disturbing her and then run out as fast as possible before the hatred he felt toward himself engulfed him. None of this would've happened if not for him.

"Lily . . ." he said, once again acknowledging her by her first name, "I'm sorry. I should never have bothered you. Whatever it is, we can talk about it tomorrow morning." (Or we can just forget about it completely, he silently implored.)

When Lily didn't respond, he made his way to the dresser to retrieve her wand. However, it was not there. Heart jolting, James dropped to his knees to search the floor without even bothering to turn on the lights.

"What the—?"

He rose back to his feet and reached for the door, but it would not budge.

"We've been locked in," he announced to her, running various explanations through his mind. Again, he glanced around for their wands, but they were out of sight. Only one name came to mind —

"SIRIUS!"