Hello Readers! Yes, i've finally updated!
So sorry again for the delay - but I can hopefully write a lot more now i'm back from holiday and uni is finished :) I have also managed to battle past a bit of writers block, which will hopefully stay away for a while!/
As always, a massive thankyou to those who reviewed last chapter: angels041630, scarwth, OMJH1012, dancingintherayne, lhaine07, suze18, leah97, kelmikmag, fyrebirdrises and eliley. It's always so good to hear what you think! And thanks for being so patient and loyal!
And a huge thanks to my amazing beta reader ct522, who got this chapter back to me so quickly!
I won't hold you up any longer! Happy Reading!
I woke up the next morning as something began to play with the end of my braid. I stilled for a moment before the smell of the pillow beneath me swept into my nose. Cinnamon. Instantly I felt a smile pulling at the corners of my lips; there was only one person I knew who smelled so sweet, and I felt myself sinking further into the bed, no longer feeling the urgency to move. A gentle breeze flowed through the room, causing the shorter hairs which no longer fit into my braid to tickle against my face. I forced myself to open my eyes, instantly greeted by the early morning sun peeking through the window. Peeta always left the curtains ajar in order to let the wind cool the room, my smile widened as I noticed another one of Peeta's habits. It had bothered me to no end when I'd first shared a bed with Peeta and he'd opened the window - but now I couldn't sleep without it, even as the icy breeze elicited a trail of goose bumps along my exposed arm. Peeta somehow automatically sensed this, pulling the covers over my arm. I waited for him to finish running his hands through my hair, loosening it completely from the braid, before I turned around to face him. I was greeted by a lazy smile as his eyes struggled to adjust to the morning light.
"What are you doing up so early?" I crooned. I wasn't sure of the time, but hunting in the morning for years has allowed me to just it pretty accurately by the sun.
He shrugged before letting his arm encircle me, pulling me closer to his chest. "Baker's body clock." He muttered. I tried not to pick up on the fact that he doesn't need to get up so early anymore, but something told me not to approach the subject.
I laughed as his hand slipped up my back and into my hair, playing obsessively with it. He gave me a guilty smile before leaning forward to press his lips to my forehead. "I wish you'd wear it down more often," his eyes sweeping over the brown locks as the tendrils trailed along my shoulders.
"And look like a wild animal all day?" I raised an eyebrow at him.
"I quite like that look," a glimmer of something passed across his eyes, making me warm in the pit of my stomach, and I tried to hide the blush that spread over my cheeks. I'm not sure where the thought came from, but I was suddenly convinced there was a hidden meaning behind Peeta's words.
We remained in each other's arm for a while, slowly letting the morning sink it, before Peeta groaned and rolled onto his back, stretching his arms up over his head - and giving me a sneaky glance of his bare torso as the covers slipped down his chest.
"You going hunting this morning?" he asked, bringing me back to reality.
"Oh, um..." I blurted out quickly, face flushing red as Peeta smirked at me knowingly. Why was it when I caught him looking at me he pulled it off - whereas I managed to make it somehow comical? "Actually, I had something else in mind." My legs seemed to have a mind of their own; dragging me out of bed toward my discarded trousers strewn across the floor. I never had the patience to fold my clothes like Peeta did each night. My hand delved into the pocket, and once my fingers grazed the paper inside I realised what I was looking for.
"What is that?" Peeta murmured as I pulled the envelope from the pocket.
"It's a letter," I scanned my eyes over it - it was heavily crumpled and the ink on the address was smudged slightly as if the person writing it hadn't had the patience to seal it delicately. "I think it's from Johanna." I felt my throat close as I croaked out her name. I couldn't back out now. I knew my new-found courage had something to do with Dr Aurelius urging me to talk to Peeta more, and I was going to take advantage of it.
Peeta motioned for me to come back over to the bed, and as I climbed back, he peered at the handwriting over my shoulder.
"Yeah, that's Johanna's" I could hear the smile in his voice and instantly the feeling in my throat intensified. When would I be able to smile at the thought of my friends? But then again, Peeta had never hurt them.
I leaned back into Peeta's chest, suddenly needing the comfort of his touch. However, I instantly regretted it when I felt myself shaking against him.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked softly, his arm circling around my waist.
I nodded eagerly, I couldn't back out now. I passed the letter to him, tilting myself away from it so that I couldn't see the letter but could still feel his firm chest against my back.
"Will you still read it for me?" I asked quietly. I wished I was strong enough to read it myself, but it was likely I wouldn't make it all the way through.
Peeta didn't say anything, instead he took his arm from around me and quickly opened the envelope before returning his arm to its place around my waist. He cleared his throat almost awkwardly, making me suddenly nervous about what the letter would hold.
"Brainless," Peeta started, letting out a small chuckle. I had to roll my eyes, of course Johanna would start a letter so abruptly. "I'll keep this short as I hate writing letters, but since you insist on ignoring everyone's calls - I've forced myself to send this. I suppose I should let you know what's happening with us - I've been living with Annie and Finnick in Four since we left Thirteen, although I can assure you I will be jumping ship as soon as the baby comes along. Annie's been doing really well, she still drifts off into her own little world sometimes, and I have to admit it's hilarious when she forgets she's pregnant. Although no one else finds her freak-outs amusing... And I guess I'm getting better, although if my doctor tries to get me to lie in a bath full of water once more, I will happily drown him in it. Finnick's probably making the most progress of us all, although I suppose he had the furthest to come."
At the mention of Finnick's name I could already feel the thickening in my throat and the burning behind my eyes as I blinked back tears. Finnick was always the hardest one to think of, maybe even worse than my mother or Gale. He'd nearly been killed by my actions, if it hadn't have been for Peeta, Annie's baby would have been fatherless.
"Hey, Katniss." Peeta cooed softly, I only then realised his hand had moved to my shoulder, gripping it comfortingly. "I can stop if you need me to."
"I just," I choked out, but as Peeta circled his arms around me, it was much easier to throw myself into his chest then try to explain myself. He held me close to him as my tears soaked into his shirt where I'd pressed my face.
"He could've died, Peeta." I whispered after a while, the words sending a painful pang through my chest.
"But he didn't, and he really is doing much better." Peeta murmured into my hair before placing a soft kiss on the crown of my head.
"No thanks to me." The resentment was clear in my voice. I'd been the one who'd almost led him to his death, I didn't save him, nor had I participated in his recovery.
"Katniss," Peeta scolded me, placing a hand under my chin and forcing me to look up at him. "We've been through this, Finnick knew what he was getting into when he went out there. We all did. He doesn't blame you, so you shouldn't either."
I sighed heavily before leaning against him again, this was an argument neither of us would ever win.
"What else does the letter say?" I asked. Peeta looked at me doubtfully before picking the piece of paper up and scanning his eyes over the remaining part of the letter.
"She mentioned some more about Finnick's recovery, then added a few insults before demanding you call her." He shook his head lightly, although the amusement was clear in his eyes.
"How has Finnick's recovery been?" I asked quietly, ashamed it had taken me all these months to even think to ask. The memory of what happened had always been too painful.
"Maybe you should read Annie's letter, she'll probably tell you some of it." I knew that was Peeta's way of trying to encourage me to finish reading the letters rather than relying on him, but I quickly shook my head - I wanted to hear this from him. Coming from Annie would be too much.
"Honestly, he was in pretty bad shape after the war. I went to see him in the hospital before I was taken to the Capitol." He swallowed loudly, as if trying to keep his emotions at bay - I was suddenly glad I had been deprived the chance to see him. "I know you were told he suffered from brain damage, but it was much worse than people had anticipated after his initial tests. He struggled to talk or even move his arms and legs. He had to undergo a lot of physical therapy and was in a wheelchair for a while - It's a good thing Johanna was around or god knows how Annie would've coped."
I suddenly felt terrible for wallowing in self pity since coming back to Twelve. If it wasn't for Peeta pulling me out of my shell, I wouldn't have even known the suffering they'd all been through. The regret came hounding back at me at the thought of all the calls I'd missed from Johanna, how many times she could've needed my help or just a friendly chat to take her away from Finnick's pain.
"But the closer it gets to Annie's due date, the more determined he's been to get better. He's got his speech back completely, and he's walking again - he just gets tired easily." I could feel Peeta's mood shift, he was proud of his friend for getting better - and they all had something exciting in their future.
"I wish you'd told me sooner." I murmured.
"I didn't know how you'd take it. You should ring him Katniss, he still struggles to write - but he worries about you. He and Annie ask about you every time I speak to them."
I opened and closed my mouth, trying to somehow formulate a response - find some kind of excuse for my inability to talk to a friend who needed me.
"It's okay." Peeta smiled lightly, "I didn't mean today, I just want you to think about it."
I just nodded slowly, forcing myself to swallow down the lump that had formed in my throat. I silently took the letter from Peeta, casting my eyes over Johanna's almost illegible scrawl - it showed how well she and Peeta had stayed in contact since he was able to read it without hesitation. A longing began to build in my stomach as I re-read the first couple of lines. I missed her, even her insults and utter disregard for other people at times. But she was the fiery spirit we all needed in our lives.
"She misses you Katniss, even admitted so herself - believe it or not." Peeta laughed lightly.
I felt a sad smile creep over my lips. Never had I thought Johanna and I would actually get on, let alone miss each other.
"Come on," Peeta urged after a few moments of silence. He hoisted himself up off the bed - noticeably wincing when he applied pressure to his prosthetic. I raised my eyebrows in suspicion but he carefully avoided my gaze.
"What are you doing?" I asked as he leant over the bed towards me with outstretched arms.
Peeta smiled widely, a glint of mischief in his eyes, before I suddenly felt myself hoisted from the sheets and into his arms.
"I have the most beautiful woman in the whole of Panem in my bed and I managed to make her cry, I thought I'd better rectify that."
I rolled my eyes at his comment, knowing better than to argue with him. I was soon laughing when Peeta jostled me around in his arms so he had me clutched against his chest - my feet swept up from underneath me.
"And how do you plan on doing that?" I smirked at him.
"You shall see," he winked at me before carrying me out the room and down the stairs.
Once he'd managed to perfectly navigate us both into the kitchen with ease, he placed me down onto the kitchen table, letting his hand caress down my bare thigh as he moved away. I couldn't help but bite my lip to hold back a grin as his eyes slowly made their way across my skin. I didn't know when I'd become so comfortable around him - with only his baggy shirt and my underwear to cover my modesty.
"I don't know about you..." Peeta purred, bringing his eyes up to met mine. "But I'm suddenly very hungry." I let out a small gasp as his tongue darted out to wet his lips. I felt a longing building at the pit of my stomach, a feeling I'd never experienced without us even touching.
"Hungry for what?" I asked, barely able to recognise my own voice as it came out low and husky.
The surprise was evident in Peeta's eyes, but he soon composed himself - reaching out to cup my neck with one hand, running his thumb along the line of my chin. I could feel the breath hitch in my throat as his hand moved down to ghost over it before resting above my chest.
"You have no idea, do you..." he murmured, as if lost in his own thoughts.
"Of what?" I asked, scooting myself closer to the edge of the table, wanting to feel more of his touch as his hand moved back up to cup around my neck.
"The effect you have." He flashed me a half smile, and I instantly felt myself grinning back at him - remembering a time he'd spoken the same words to me. My eyes drifted away from his as I took in the image of him in front of me, and soon my hands were on his bare chest, just wanting to touch him in some way.
His hands moved into my hair, massaging my scalp softly and I groaned in appreciation. I don't think he realised the effect he had on me. The feeling in my stomach just seemed to grow as I let my hand drift down to his hips bones, pulling him close to me so that his waist was wedges between my legs.
"You know," Peeta's eyes seemed to reluctantly tear away from scanning over me as I spoke. "I think someone forgot to give me a good-morning kiss."
Peeta didn't skip a beat before pulling my lips to his. I expected his kiss to be one of light caresses, but instead he pressed his wet lips to mine firmly - his hands pulling on the roots of my hair lightly. I groaned involuntarily as his lips began to move slowly and forcefully against mine. I could almost feel my lips immediately swelling, but I only pulled him closer- enjoying this new side to him.
One of his hands continued to hold my face closer to his, as the other trailed down my body. I gasped as he ran it across my chest, and I felt him began to pull away. Desperate to keep him close, I wrapped my bare thighs around the backs of his legs. Peeta seemed to take the hint, letting his hand continue its journey down my stomach and onto my thigh, enjoying the skin there before he moved to my hips, kneading the area with his thumb, following the phythm of his lips against mine.
The moment was interrupted when my stomach decided to growl loudly, making Peeta pull away with a large grin.
"It seems you're hungry for something other than me." He joked, but I felt my cheeks blush wildly at his comment.
He chuckled lowly at my response before lifting me up off the table and setting me back on my feet.
"What do you want to eat?" He asked before turning on his heels and rummaging through his cupboards. "I could make muffins? Or cheese buns... but they might take a while." He continued to list off all the ingredients he had before I cut him off, spotting a carton of eggs on the counter.
"What about omelettes?"
His face fell as he looked over his shoulder at me, "but, it's not very special..."
"Peeta," I laughed, moving across the room to find a frying pan. "You don't have to make something amazing every time we eat."
I began beating the eggs in a bowl before he had chance to protest any further, of course he insisted on adding extra ingredients before I threw the mixture in the pan. I didn't understand why we needed peppers, mushroom, cheese and ham all in one meal - but I let him humour himself, not even commenting when he insisted on adding salt and pepper. I stood aside as he cooked, knowing I'd probably just burn the meal anyway. Instead I busy myself by wandering out of the kitchen and through the bottom floor of Peeta's house. I realised I'd hardly been anywhere in his house apart from his bedroom - he would usually come round to mine. I wandered into the living room, not surprised when I see it looked exactly the same as mine -apart from the lack of decoration, I really needed to ask him about that, and the stack of large boxes in the corner. I frowned, walking over to them and reading the labels - recognising who they were from when I saw the Capitol delivery stamp.
When I walked back into the kitchen Peeta was already placing the plates on the table, he flashed me a small smile before gesturing for me to sit down - not doing so himself until I had. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at his need to be chivalrous at all times.
"Are all those boxes Delly's?" I asked before even tasting the food.
Peeta laughed lightly, "Yeah they are. I think she's developed some kind of hoarding problem."
I smiled back at him, wondering how she could find so many things in the Capitol to her taste. "When is she meant to be moving back?"
"A couple of weeks I think. She hasn't decided on a definite date yet, but she said it would be around then." Peeta nonchalantly stuffed a mouthful of omelette into his mouth.
"So soon?" I raised my eyebrows. "How come you never mentioned it?"
He shrugged, "It must've slipped my mind."
I frowned at him, "Since when were you such a bad liar?"
He looked up at me, a guilty look on his face. "I only am with you," he sighed, placing his cutlery down on the table to give me his full attention.
"Where is she staying?" I asked slowly, realising the one reason he'd want to keep it from me.
"Well, I kind of hinted she and her brother could stay here until she finds something more permanent."
"And you didn't think to mention this?" I felt my voice becoming sharper as I narrowed my eyes at him.
"Oh, come on Katniss," he groaned. "It's not like I'm going to be sleeping in the same bed as her." He reached across the table to take my hand in his. "As big as my bed is, I doubt it'd fit the three of us in."
I rolled my eyes at his attempt to humour me, forcing myself not to grin back at his pathetically desperate smile. "That's not the point, Peeta," I sighed.
He raised his eyebrows, wanting me to continue. I groaned, hating that I had to explain this. Technically I had no say over whether Delly could stay in Peeta's house. It wasn't like we lived together, and I knew he'd never even look at another woman.
"I just, I don't like that you kept me out of this. I think it's a decision you should've ran by me."
"I didn't think it would be a problem," Peeta's face fell momentarily before he perked back up again. "I was planning to stay at yours anyway," he grinned at me and I couldn't help but allow myself a small smile.
"Alright, but this needs to stop. You need to tell me things," I tried not to imagine all the information he'd held back from me over the past few months. "From now on, we make decisions as a couple," I found myself pulling at face at the word, but Peeta looked utterly delighted, pulling my hand across the table to place a soft kiss to the back of it.
"Yes, love." He smirked at me before letting go of my hand completely. "Now, no more talking, breakfast is going cold."
"Peeta, I need to go," I laughed, as he spun me round yet again so that I was facing away from the door. He started to pout out his bottom lip, something that reminded me of how Prim would've behaved when she didn't get her own way.
"Why?" he groaned, wrapping his arms around my waist to keep me in place.
"Because, I need to get changed." I raised an eyebrow as Peeta's eyes casted down my body.
"I don't see a problem," he smirked, earning a smack in the chest. I was still wearing Peeta's shirt which I had slept in, only now it was accompanied by a pair of his shorts which were clearly too big for me.
"Alright, alright, you can go," he laughed, holding a hand to his chest to feign being wounded. "I value my own life too much to hold you hostage."
I rolled my eyes at him, "You're such a drama queen, Mellark." He just grinned wider at my comment.
"Just promise me one thing," he leant forward so that his lips ghosted along my ear. "Promise you'll come back to me."
I pulled back from him, furrowing my brows. "Of course I will." I hastily met his lips with mine, pressing a short but firm kiss against them. "Why don't you make us something to go with dinner? You won't even notice I'm gone." I winked at him before darting out the front door, barely glancing back to see him waving at me with an amused look on his face.
Peeta only retreated back indoors once he'd seen I'd made it to the steps outside my house, and furiously waved at him to go several times. As I reached for the handle to my front door, I was interrupted by a gruff cough from across the village. I looked towards Haymitch's house, not surprised when I saw him sitting on his steps, smirking knowingly in my direction.
"Nice getup, sweetheart." I could see him dying to laugh at me, I crossed my arms over my chest - refusing to let him get a rise out of me.
"I thought I'd try out a new look." I considered ignoring him and walking into my house, but instead found myself stepping back down the steps and towards him.
"For two people who are trying to be discreet, you're not doing a very good job."
"What do you mean?" I scowled.
"Oh come on, I'm not daft. It was obvious from the moment that boy came back to Twelve that this would happen." I forced myself to hold his gaze, although the amusement in his eyes was tearing apart my resolve by the second.
"What would happen?" I asked slowly. Haymitch threw his head back and groaned in exasperation.
"You really are a nightmare sweetheart. Good luck to the boy." He stood up and turned back towards his house, obviously fed up with our conversation. But I wasn't finished with him yet.
"Just what are you implying?" I called to him. He craned his head over his shoulder and laughed at me.
"I wasn't implying anything, it's you who's putting accusations in my mouth."
"Then why say anything?" I spat back. I knew what Haymitch was thinking, he never thought I was good enough for Peeta - and he probably assumed I was using him for my own needs. Although my attire wasn't helping my argument.
"Look, girl. I don't really care what you pair do. I got tired of warning you both a long time ago." He sighed before turning back towards me fully. "I was actually going to say I was happy for you both. You almost made me wretch this morning with how happy you looked."
"Oh," I muttered, letting my arms drop to my side. "Well... thank you."
Haymitch just rolled his eyes before making his way up the steps, bending down to pick up a large bag from the floor. I frowned as I watched him awkwardly carry it down the steps, carrying on as if I was no longer stood there.
"What are you doing?" I asked, following him round the side of his house and towards the back garden.
"Carrying a bag of feed, what does it look like?" he grunted, clearly under the weight of the bag.
"The geese are here?" I asked. I hadn't seen him bring them round.
"I'm collecting them later, might as well get this pen set up properly for them." He dropped the bag onto the ground in front of the pen. I felt myself smile lightly when I saw the work he'd done on it. Although Peeta had done most of the external structure of the pen, Haymitch had managed to sort the bedding area, as well as setting up a rather shabby looking fence for them to run around in.
"Do you want a hand?" I asked. He turned round and frowned at me, glancing back at the bag he'd already carried from the house. "I mean with collecting them later, I'd like to help."
I could've swore I saw a smile playing on his lips, but he quickly disguised it before a more sinister grin appeared on his face. "Sure sweetheart, but I'm not going to be seen dead with you wearing that."