Sorry about the wait, I've been having problems as usual and life is losing its color. I'd like to enthusiastically show you the chapter but I'm tireddddd.
I really am sorry. I know some of you like to get updates fast like I did in summer but school takes its toll on me and I'm exhausted.
Review responses:
TheSlayerGirl: If they'd finally make a PLUSHIE for Canada I would give him to you, but sadly…. ;-;
AiLeiben: Thank you! I appreciate the feedback~~~ And I try to update but writing is so tiring…
TheLastOfUs: hehehehe. I'm glad you liked it! And I need to check your profile again. You really do write in a fantastic way~
kittycatpony: HEHEHEHE DON'T WORRY I'M NOT FINISHED WITH TORTURING THEM YET v-v I must apologize but I have a little problem with my ships, I am the hurricane and I destroy all ships :D
canadaprussia: I love your username, and thank you! I love Kumajirou… And I try to honestly portray France but his character type can be hard to elaborate on…
Leona 'Jay' Jasmin: Thank you for the support :D and thanks for the feedback as well. I'm trying.. But it's hard to describe. Like the harder I try to stay happy, the more difficult it is to really be happy.
bluebacon: I honestly love getting your reviews, you sound enthusiastic whenever I read them. I just hope you like the story in general when it's completed (:
hetaliafan101: I'm sorry ;-; *hands tissue*
Fiadraye: Thank you! This is probably the most important issue to me, where people romanticize self-mutilation. I try to bring out all the negative effects it has on people, but sometimes things sound more like I'm promoting it ;-; don't worry, I'm NOT. AT ANY POINT EVER.
The otaku girl: Thank you *hands muffin*
Anon: Thank you! I'm glad I got some guest reviewers, it gets so lonely ;-;
Kurenai-san: Thank you! Please review again! :D
Guest: I know, right? England will shape up eventually, don't worry!
IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY, PLEASE COME UP WITH A GUEST NAME FOR ME SO I CAN REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE~~~
The airport was nearly empty, much to Canada's glee. Canada couldn't completely suppress the smile that lightened his features, and England noticed, a wry smile spreading across his own face. Canada sighed lightly as he struggled to carry his luggage, rotating his shoulder tiredly. He quickly picked up the pace, his shoes squeaking lightly on the tile. England suppressed the urge to hug Canada right then and there, and tightened his hold on his own bags.
Canada rushed through the airport, straight to America and France, who had gotten there early in a sad attempt to out-do the Englishman. France deemed himself victorious, however, and rushed at Canada, enveloping him in a classic bear-hug. America's eye twitched in a very defensive way, and he stepped in front of France, moving his arms away from Canada as he did so.
Suddenly, Canada felt the beginnings of withdrawal symptoms from the time that he spent resisting the urges to self-mutilate. His breathing shallowed out, his heartbeat accelerated wildly, and his fingers grew severely cold.
Oh no, not this, not this…
I've heard about this, it's common among self-harmers... the dreaded withdrawal symptoms…
Why haven't I experienced this before?
Why now? I should be happy, and now I just feel anxious and numb…
Like…
Like I need a cut…
Not here… how long do I have to wait? Until after my flight…! Or even later! I have to find razors!
Canada was shaking lightly, tremors building in his upper arms and shoulders, and cascading down his lithe back. England noticed easily, feeling Canada's forehead quickly.
"Matthew, your forehead is quite warm…"
Matthew blushed furiously, not used to the almost maternal contact. In his movement, he bumped America by accident, sparking another defensive attack- this time on England.
"This is my brother, man! Back off!"
"You bloody wanker, I told you a million times not to interfere with me!"
Canada sighed, walking towards the gates. France reluctantly followed suit, eyes following a rather adorable young girl. She flushed and continued walking, although she stole a few glances toward him. France winked and then stopped walking as Canada slowed in front of the gate. Canada's mind was working itself up by now.
My fingers feel like ice…
This isn't supposed to be happening... This is supposed to be for long-term things! Why now!
My feet hurt, and my head hurts, and I have chills like nothing else… is this normal? How do I stop it?
At this point, England and America stopped bickering long enough to sprint over to France and Canada.
He pulled out his smart phone, typing the question quickly as England stared, dumbfounded.
Why the bloody hell is he on his phone?
Meanwhile, Canada had his turn to be dumbfounded.
Withdrawal symptoms include but are not limited to: headache, dizziness, nausea, acid reflux tendencies, chest pain, chills, goose bumps, temperature changes, and a sense of foreboding/anxiety.
Well fuck. I don't really know what to do now.
And there aren't any results for solutions, other than the obvious one to actually cut…
"All passengers flying to France board now, repeat, flight 201A to France is now boarding. All first-class or reserved seats may board at this time."
The nations picked up their bags and headed for the plane.
As the nations boarded the plane, England realized he sat next to Canada. And for reasons unknown to him, he felt- actually- happy about that fact.
I'm not…happy… about sitting with him. I mean…. I am, but I'm not, and I want to be around him…
Canada felt himself melt into the seat quickly, blinking and finding it difficult to force his lids open once more. His mind started to wander off into wonderland, and he felt himself drift into blissful, dreamless slumber. England watched with morbid fascination as Canada fell asleep literally five seconds after boarding the plane.
He must be seriously exhausted, falling asleep so quickly… I wonder if I'm overworking him lately. He isn't resting as he should. I know he works for long hours each day, and that's why he has this vacation time available. I should have known that this was a bad time for him to be overexerting himself, and now he's suffering… probably mentally and physically as well.
Is it all my fault?
England spaced out as the plane took off, staring at Canada's sleeping face. The features of Canada flattened and relaxed in his sleeping state, making him appear like a sleeping child. His long eyelashes fanned out, the dark brown of them contrasting his pale face. Matthew's breathing was shallow at times, then deep and steady, as though his heart struggled to beat with his inner drum. Canada stirred slightly, reaching up in his sleep to brush at his ear. The pressure change made his ears ache slightly, and so he began to wake, eyes fluttering open to the world around him.
He didn't seem to like the reality, though, so he opted to return to his slumber, no matter how painful his nightmares would become. He allowed his eyes to slide shut, and his hands slipped gracefully back to his legs. His eyes twitched, signaling another dream, and England took notice of the way Canada would move as he entered his dreams, tensing as if in physical pain. His eyebrows twitched slightly, then relaxed. He had given up.
Suddenly, his chest caved in, a shuddering breath releasing itself. His eyes filled with tears, some spilling immediately over onto his pants, others dripping down his cheeks slowly.
England rushed to his aid, shaking Canada to wake him, although it was in vain. Canada appeared trapped inside the dream, either not wanting to face the even harsher realities of life or just feeling like he needed to finish the dream.
In a quick movement, Canada's eyes snapped open and his hands reached to brush the tears. He was awake now, that was for sure. His shocked, horrified expression told all.
America glanced over France to see how his brother was doing, and his eyes widened in shock and the fear of the unknown that he saw.
England was helping Canada?
Canada sat, red eyes and lips swollen from biting at them. England brushed any tears that threatened to stain his cheeks, and whispered comforting words to Matthew.
America wanted to be the hero for real this time… and he was losing it all.
I wanted to save him… he's my other half, and I've made so many mistakes, and I just want to save him! Is that too much to ask for? Why is England so concerned anyway? From now on, I will take care of him.
The plane descended into France's land, waking him as the presence of his land registered within him. England sighed in relief as the plane landed quickly and quietly, unbuckling his seatbelt as the plane slowed to a stop.
He grasped Canada's hands and pulled him upwards as Kumajirou woke at Matthew's feet. Canada felt Kumajirou climb into Canada's backpack and the three exited the plane as America silently fumed behind them.
I will be the one. I will be the only one he runs to from now on. I will not let anyone take my precious brother away.
I will be the one that's gonna hold you
I will be the one that you run to
My love is
A burning, consuming fire
No!
You'll never be alone
When darkness comes I'll light the night with stars
Hear the whispers in the dark
-Skillet, Whispers in the Dark
Drop me a review, reminder that I love all reviews, including guest. Make an account if you can, so I can PM you with suggestions for your own writing, or vice versa. I like to establish connections with my readers.
My 50th reviewer is TheLastOfUs and I appreciate that~ Hopefully I counted right. I pretty much screw up everything so check if you'd like lol.
Tell me to get my butt up and write, I'm lazy…. Again, I apologize for the wait. OTL