~*Anxiety*~

Dear Diary,

Today was perhaps one of the longest days I've ever been forced through. Not even my years with the smugglers were this horrendous. It's all because of that blasted elf. He's become extra insufferable. The others aren't helping, especially Isabela and Varric. They're really smug. Merrill was oddly quiet.

But that's beside the point! What am I going to do that that man? Gutting him is an option…it would certainly be colorful. I just haven't a clue what to do about this, other than resort to violence (highly recommended).

Those dreams…they haven't left me in peace yet. It's been a whole week, and I never thought I'd say I missed my usual nightmares. Anything is better than having to relive that memory…it's like re-opening an old scab. I'm no dream expert, but I know enough that having the same dream over and over means something is wrong. Oh, where's Anders when I need him?

I feel like everyone's been off today, not just me and the elf. Like they're all sharing some dirty little secrets. Anders looked infuriated, particularly at Isabela. Must have been an off night. Aveline didn't look too happy either. Probably, she's worried me and the elf are going to start breaking things in her precious Viscount Keep. I have to admit, we came pretty close to blows that night.

Hawke looked carefully at the sentence, and then reached over for an eraser.

Forget about that.

The cold breeze is finally starting to set in, at least. It really helps out when we're scouting out in Sundermount. We ran passed that cave me and the elf were trapped in a few weeks back. To think we managed a whole night without killing each other…amazing…

Another thing, something weird happened with Merrill when we came back down to Hightown that day. We passed by the Accessories shop, when suddenly she made a loud comment about the jewelry. I distinctly remember that one conversation we had about diamond rings, and I gaped at her in horror. "Perhaps I should ask Fenris my question, now," she muttered, eyeing the elf lurking nearby. I was furious and beat red, so I distracted her with pointing to the dirt on the ground.

"Look! Dirt! Scoop some up for cupcakes or something!" She did it too, looking as happy as a school girl. That wasn't the weird part, though it was odd and incredibly awkward for me. In the corner of my eye, however, I saw Isabela having an absolute field day. I mean, she was crouched over laughing her pretty little lungs out. I am convinced, now more than ever, that the party is planning something behind my back.

The elf didn't seem to notice anything. When I walked over towards him, he made some snide remark I can't remember. I told him we were going to Merrill's house for cupcakes later. It took some convincing, but I got those two over there. I'll tell him at some point the secret ingredient. Maybe. Rotten bastard.

Regards,

~Hawke