When Betrothal Goes Wrong.
Part 11.
I do not own Robin Hood.
15/5/09 and16/5/09.
A.N. Exams and Night out is my excuse. The latter not as valid but I could hardly write this after that night, believe me. So it will be a short one as it is a brief light-bulb moment.
I returned to Locksley Manor with Sir Guy. I thought he was happy with me, but he wasn't as happy as I thought he would have been. We had been practically blessed by Prince John, The Sheriff was powerless, apart from his words of warning to me that suggested I could be in danger at any moment and Lord Edward was sure to be in a great deal of trouble with Prince John.
"Welcome home." I said.
"Is it?" He asked.
"Guy?" I questioned his tone.
"Why do I still have the feeling that you're not here because you love me? Apart from the obvious that you still haven't said those words." He replied.
He expected me to say it on command, but I had had enough of admitting how I felt for one day. I said nothing but felt guilty when he turned away with disappointment in his eyes. I thought back to The Sheriff's words. 'When you see it you will know.' Was he talking about an expression? Or a direct action? Either way the riddle had puzzled me and almost worried me, but not as much as the thought that Sir Guy was loosing interest in me.
"If I say it now, you'll think
me humouring you. I have heard tell of couples who instinctively know
that they love each other. Isn't there a chance that we are one of
them?" I asked.
As I spoke to him, I put my hand on his arm.
By the time I had finished speaking, as I had deliberately thrown in
the word 'couples', he turned to me and wrapped his arms around me.
In response to my question I was kissed much more passionately than
ever before. I rose up to the devil inside me and responded just as
well. I had always heard that one thing led to another with men, when
you're in love with a man, when suddenly all that matters is being
with him, obeying him and pleasing him. I know full well that I
consented to everything that happened to me, that ended with waking
up the following morning, in pale, muscular arms against a pale,
muscular chest, with not a stitch between either of us. Did I regret
it? Of course in some way, it was immoral, rude and unacceptable, yet
as I thought back to that night, how could I? How could I regret the
look in Sir Guy's eyes when he woke up and found me still in his
arms? He looked to start with amazed, impressed, then finally very
happy as he looked down and kissed me good morning. I noticed how he
got ready for the day, he walked with an unmistakable swagger about
him as though he owned all of England. I caught him about his day to
day business, I had always heard him described as a merciless beast.
Yet when the tax man complained that a man hadn't paid his taxes on
time, I saw him reach into his own pocket. I felt a sense of pride,
The Sheriff had been wrong, or so I thought. Yet when I turned back
after smirking slightly to myself, the man was on the floor with two
coins in his eyes. I rushed over as his family gathered around him.
His young wife tried to wake him, I checked for the slightest sign
but it was too late.
"I'm so sorry." I said.
"How can you be? How can you? Are the rumours true? You actually want to be in his presence?" She asked.
"You don't understand..." I began.
"Oh no your ladyship! It is you who do not understand what he puts us through. He sometimes makes the Sheriff look kind." She added and left.
It was then that The Sheriff's words haunted me again. 'When you see it you will know.' I saw death and I knew that I would need the highest protection that could be provided if ever I displeased him. I returned to Nottingham Castle and said the words, I had hoped I never would.
"Sheriff Vasey, you were right. I saw it and I know." I said.
He looked at me and nodded quite calmly.
"Alright, that was big of you. But what does it mean? Will you stay or will you go? You have to let him know and you have to let me know." He said.
"What concern is it of yours if I do either?" I asked.
"Don't hurt me so Rose, your actions are of great concern to me. If you would believe me, I would actually feel something if anything happened to you. I know you have a burning passion for that man, but that could be the death of you. Perhaps you should turn that passion to someone else hmmm?" He suggested.
"Vasey don't go there. I made up my mind. There's something I can do, there must be." I replied.
"Rose it's too late. The damage is done, it's been long done and dead. He is who he is. You are what you are. Now all you have to decided if you as you are can accept him as he is." Said The Sheriff.