A/N: Hi guys and welcome to all new readers! This chapter took a bit longer than the others, but it's super long. Always remember, this is a mature and in some parts dark story that contains language, violence, sexual content and character loss. It may not be suitable for some readers, so read with discretion. A pirate's life is no bed of roses! I warned you. And as always I want encourage you to review. Tell me what you like, what you don't like, everything.
Chapter 11: City of Snakes
One week later:
The sticky air in the cabin made it hard to breathe. Emma would have liked to open the door to let in some fresh air, but unfortunately, that wasn't possible, because the Captain had kept his promise and locked her in. Counting the minutes, she sat on the stool and stared daggers at the door, boiling with indignation. If the captain would had entered the infirmary right at that moment, she would have lunged at him, no matter the consequences. He had ruined everything! For once in her miserable life she had been happy. She hadn't expected to meet a person who valued her for who she was without putting pressure on her. Jake was intelligent, kind and tender, and she knew her parents would have approved of him. They would have seen past his father's history. She just knew that her father would have been fond of him. He always supported people who worked their way up from nothing, earning their place in society. And there was that kiss, her first kiss with a man…
Jake could barely look at her now. He spent most of his time on deck with the others, only coming back to the cabin to sleep. Emma had tried to talk to him, but he avoided any conversation unless it was about medicine. She would have understood if he was blaming her for the situation. He was about to lose his home of the past years because of their ill-advised conduct. But the kiss had been more than a drunken mistake and he knew it, too. At least his eyes couldn't lie.
She didn't care what Hook thought of her. There was nothing wrong with caring for someone, even if she really was a boy. Admittedly, she did understand that flirtation on board a ship would only cause problems, but his reaction had been much more than a rebuke. He punished them in the worst way possible. By separating them, taking away yet another person she cared about.
For a while, she had thought she'd been wrong about him. She had searched for a reason explaining the crew's love for him and had almost been convinced that he was capable of compassion, only to be bitterly disappointed.
Aside from that, it baffled her that she was the center of his attention. If Jake was able to buy her an out, why didn't Hook let him? Didn't a pirate always care about money? It made no sense that he abandoned a doctor whose work was imperative on a ship, and kept her, a dispensable cabin boy, on board.
It was as if he'd set his mind on denying her all happiness, just to win the game he was still playing with her. The more she thought about it, the less she understood how a woman could leave her home to live with such a cruel man. Moreover, how could any woman deal with his continuous mood swings?
After a while she felt a jolt under her feet and heard the voices of the crew outside that indicated their departure. They had made port for a few hours to sell their wheat in a food market, which was a day's journey away from Abydos*. In the Enchanted Forest it was also known as the 'City of Snakes', a place filled with mysteries, tales, and all-encompassing wonders. And thanks to the Captain, she wouldn't see any of the infamous magicians or smell any of the foreign spices, because she was locked in this hole for the entire bloody week.
She brushed some hair off her face, feeling sweat wetting her forehead. Since they were traveling south, it was getting warmer each day. She wasn't used to such temperatures and again, she damned the Captain for locking her in here, while the others could feel the warm air and sand on their skin.
Soon, Bernie would bring her some water and food, and if she was lucky, Jake would come to say goodbye before leaving the ship in Abydos this evening. Hook already planned to recruit a new doctor there, he'd told her as much the day before. Since the incident, he'd changed his habit; he went from ignoring her to popping in every day after supper to check if everything was 'in order'. She knew he didn't do it because he was concerned about her well-being. It was more to control Jake and her.
Day dreaming of scenarios in which she poured rum over Hook's face, or stole his hook and threw it over board, she stood up to stretch her legs when she suddenly heard a clatter of boots and a confusing sound of many voices.
"Where is it? Is it dead?"
In an attempt to make out more than scraps of conversation, she pressed her ear against the wood.
And then she heard the blood-curdling scream of a familiar voice.
"Bloody hell, Jake!" Clarke shouted.
Next, Hook's dominant voice was breaking the silence.
"Get out of the way!"
Emma backed away from the door, as she heard the voices getting closer and a key turning in the lock. The door swung open forcefully. Ramsay and Clarke entered the infirmary, carrying Jake between them. Hook followed them inside, a dead black snake with orange stripes impaled on his hook.
They heaved Jake on the treatment table and Emma rushed towards the doctor.
"Make yourself useful and get me that book about envenomation. It's the red one on the shelf," Hook commanded immediately, leaving her no time to dwell on her shock.
Jake was lying back on the table, holding his arm, his face contorted with pain. Emma complied immediately, sensing this was not the first time someone had been bitten by a snake. With shaking hands, she searched for the book and returned to Hook. He snatched it from her and hastily thumbed through the pages, searching for the name of the snake. Soon enough they figured that it wasn't listed in there, so Emma walked around the table. Jake's skin was covered in sweat and he was clenching his teeth, unable to talk.
"It's alright," Emma tried to calm him as she reached for a washcloth to bathe his forehead. "We will fix this."
In reality though, she was mad with terror, her heart pounding so heavily that she was convinced everybody in the room heard it.
"Step away, boy," Hook snapped at her. "Mr. Felton needs more than soothing words."
Emma looked at him with undisguised disgust. He might be the captain, but she was the doctor's assistant and it was not like she hadn't learned anything from him during the last weeks.
"Fear and panic increase blood flow and causes the venom to move faster through the body," she stated as confidently as possible in front of the pirate captain. Of course she was no physician by training, but she had read the chapter about venomous animals only a few days prior, and she wouldn't let him treat her like she was dense. The infirmary was her ambit now. "The patient needs to stay calm, so we have to keep him from moving. And I need some boiled water."
Hook looked at her as if he wanted to bind her to the mast and whip her for her audacity to object, but remained silent. Obviously he agreed with her plans. Clarke gave the captain a questioning look and he nodded with clenched teeth. At that, Clarke left the cabin to get some of the requested water from the galley.
Hook wordlessly reached for his rum flask and removed the cork with his mouth.
"You're not going to disinfect the wound with that swill," Emma gaped at him.
His eyes narrowed as Emma chose a small brown bottle from the medicine cabinet next to the shelf and poured the alcohol over the wound.
Jake gasped but tried to keep his hand calm. After disinfecting the spot, Emma covered it with a clean cloth to keep the dirt out of it. "We need to fix his arm, so that he can't move it anymore," Emma continued, skeptically looking at the swelling. "Maybe we can sit him up. His heart should be higher than the wound."
She walked across the room to search for a pillow as Ramsay and Hook gently moved him into a sitting position.
"Maybe it's better to take off that bloody hand as a whole," Ramsay suggested when Emma returned with the pillow.
"His body is weakened and I don't know if he'll survive the blood loss," Emma objected. "I can't even give him a sedative because I don't know if it interferes with the venom. We need to keep him calm and get him to a doctor. How far is it to Abydos?"
"Five hours under full sail," Hook responded. "It's windy today, so maybe four. I've already instructed the crew to speed up."
He turned around, addressing Ramsay. "Tell Clarke to return to his post. Reaching Abydos is our first priority now. You can get the water instead."
The moment Ramsay left the infirmary, he stepped closer to Emma.
"If you ever undermine my authority again, I'll hang you upside-down on a yard until you pass out," Hook whispered, so that Jake didn't hear.
Emma swallowed hard and nodded without looking him in the eyes. She should have known that the Captain wouldn't tolerate her objection in front of his crew. To him, she wasn't more than a cabin boy and a lousy stowaway. He would never see anything more in her.
They were suddenly interrupted by a weak voice from the treatment table.
"Emmett?"
She looked down, worry written all over her face.
"If you bind my arm above the wound, you can stanch blood circulation and defer the venom from spreading to my organs," he spoke through clenched teeth. "I don't know the snake, but it may buy us some time."
Instantly, she followed his advice. Jake watched her movements with watery eyes. Staying calm took all his strength. She knew he wanted to talk, say all of the unspoken words that had lingered on their tongues for the past week. And she needed to hear them, but it wasn't possible because Hook was still present. He was standing in the room like a guard, with furrowed brows and crossed arms. Emma felt the knot in her chest tighten. Couldn't he even give them one moment of privacy? By the time he finally left the infirmary, Jake had passed out.
-/-
Bringing the Jolly Roger to its limits, they reached Abydos in four and a half hours. Emma could hear the foreign voices of the workers as they docked in. Jake's condition had become worse. He was unconscious most of the time, droplets of sweat covering his pale face. His lips were blue and his breathing short and shallow. She was sitting on the stool, holding his good hand. That was all she could do at the moment, wait and pray. She looked up when the door opened and Hook stepped in.
"We're there," he said monotonous. "I'll send Clarke for a doctor. He speaks the language."
Emma jumped up. "I have to go with him," she demanded. "I can explain his condition to the doctor on the way. Then we lose less time."
She desperately looked at Hook, knowing that it was a weak explanation. She just couldn't sit here any longer; worrying would make her go mad. She didn't intend to run away, of course she couldn't, not when Jake needed her.
"Please," she begged again.
"Okay," he surprisingly agreed, bested. "Take care on the streets. And Emmett," he grabbed her arm as she slipped past him. "Better hurry."
With that, Emma surged through the door and stormed up the ladder.
"I'm coming with you," she shouted as she saw Clarke walking down the gangway and hurried to close up. Clarke turned around and sought consent from the Captain, who had followed her on deck. Hook simply nodded, about to return to the infirmary.
When walking along the docks, Emma was instantly hit by a wall of hot air. Dust was covering her shoes and the sun burned mercilessly on her skin. The people were wearing hats and sandals and protected themselves with long tunics of light fabric. Her pale skin was unusual here and Emma felt prying eyes everywhere. She stared right back at them, just as baffled. Almost all of them had dark hair and honey-colored skin.
Clarke guided her through a market place where people offered fruits and vegetables Emma had never seen before. She almost got lost in the mix of dusty air and foreign smells. Everything was different. Even the houses were built of mud but flat, with terraces on the roofs. Emma felt crowded, much worse than in the North Harbor, especially after all this time on the ship. There seemed to be endless rows of buildings and alleys leading nowhere. This city was big, unlike anything Emma had ever seen. She was used to the simplicity of the castle or the village, but this was a new dimension, a place far off this world.
"Where are we going?" Emma shouted over the voices as Clarke led her through the market place.
"Searching for someone who knows the place. Let's ask one of the locals."
He stopped at a stall and spoke to a woman who was selling silk. Her shiny black hair, decoratively held together with a string of pearls, fell over her shoulders, reaching down to her hips. Emma looked at her open-mouthed, astonished by the exotic beauty. The woman was at least forty, but her eyes, framed by long lashes, sparkled with an ageless spirit that made Emma speechless.
She was answering his question in a melodic language.
Emma tugged at Clarke's sleeve. "What did she say?"
It was then that Emma noticed a woman in a silk blue cloak who was standing at the side of the stall, inspecting a green cloth. She wasn't wearing a hat like the other citizens, but a hood that covered her face. Reddish brown curls spilled out from it, grazing the lace-trimmed white dress as she touched the fabric with gloved hands.
Drawing attention to herself, she turned towards them and Emma caught a glimpse of slightly browned skin, but most of her features were still hidden under the hood.
"Are you from the Enchanted Forest?" the woman asked and Emma noticed that she spoke without an accent.
Emma nodded, glad to find someone she could understand.
"And you're in need of a doctor who has experience with snake bites?"
"Yes," Emma answered rapidly. "Can you help us? We can pay!"
"I may know someone."
The woman payed for the green fabric and motioned for them to follow her. She led them across the market place and through narrow alleys, away from the harbor. Soon, Emma had lost all sense of orientation. Not sure if she could trust the woman, she exchanged looks with Clarke. After all, they were in a foreign city. But then the woman stopped in front of a building. Unlike the others, it was built with stones. The entrance was lined between two pillars which showed carved tendrils, soft engravings of flora and fauna met with odd shapes and ends to overspread and curl around the pillars. The building was older than the other ones on the street; it seemed more like a temple than a residential house.
The woman reached for a massive key and unlocked the wooden door. Emma and Clarke entered a long dim corridor, only illuminated by oil lamps on the walls. The thick stone blocked off the noises of the street, and the only sounds that remained were the echo of their footsteps and their breathing. It made Emma feel slightly uncomfortable.
The woman, who hadn't given her name yet, opened the next door and when Emma stepped inside, her previous thoughts vanished from her mind.
Shelves, filled to the brim with books, all the way up to the ceiling, as far as she could see. Wooden ladders leaned on the shelves. Desk and tables were blanketed in white cloths, protecting the wood from the dust. The blinds were lowered, which made the room even darker than the corridor. It looked like a place that had been abandoned a long time ago.
"My apologies, but I can't turn on the light," the woman said kindly. "These books are very old and direct sunlight would cause great damage."
Emma reverently walked along the shelves; she would have given everything to have a closer look, but there wasn't time for that.
The woman seemed to sense her impatience and motioned for her to follow her.
"Please wait here," she addressed Clarke.
Clarke frowned at that, but there was no time for objection.
The woman walked up the spiral staircase in the middle of the room, to a door which led them onto the roof. Bright daylight blinded Emma when she stepped outside. Gusting wind of salty air disheveled her hair.
When Emma was able to open her eyes again, she gasped at the view in front of her. The library was built high. From up here, she could see the coastline with the harbor and the market place. And to her right was the city, which spanned as far as the hills in the distant. In the middle of the roofs and alleys, an emerald blue river winded its way to the harbor.
"It's beautiful up here, isn't it?" the woman said from behind her and Emma turned around.
Emma watched as she walked towards a cage filled with pigeons. Carefully, the woman opened it, picked a white one, and attached a little note to the bird's leg.
"It's the fasted way to exchange massages in this town," she explained. "The doctor is a dear friend of mine and will come immediately." She opened her hands and gave the pigeon a push. The bird spread its wings and purposefully flapped away.
"How long will it take until he's here?" Emma asked as she followed the bird with her eyes until it disappeared in the wilderness of houses and streets lying beneath.
"Maybe half an hour, if he walks fast."
Emma gasped. That was too long! Her thoughts drifted to Jake, who she'd left unconscious and almost lifeless in company of an insensitive man that had wanted to get rid of him anyway.
"I understand the urgency, but I assure you, this is the fastest way to consult a doctor. Dr. Johnston has plenty of experience with snake bites. And he speaks your language."
Emma nodded, still unsettled.
"You're from the Enchanted Forest, too, aren't you?" The fact alone that she was referring to it as the Enchanted Forest, and not Misthaven, as foreigners used to call it, spoke volumes. And Emma even noticed that she spoke with the accent of her region.
The woman looked at her for several seconds and then wordlessly lifted her hood. It revealed a face of such beauty, with long dark lashes and light blue eyes. Her lips were perfectly curved and as fine as her facial features, framed by long brown curls. A face that seemed slightly familiar.
"Do you want to tell me what you're doing so far from home, dressed as a boy and in company of a man who clearly isn't a servant from the castle?"
Emma's blood ran cold.
"You don't recognize me?" the woman said with a little smile.
Emma frantically tried to remember where she knew that face from. If the woman was familiar with her, she had to be someone who she'd met at the castle, maybe at a royal ball. She dug in her memory for a hint.
"I know it's been a while," the woman added.
Slowly, the fog lifted and unveiled a vague memory, the image of a celebration. Her mother's birthday. Ten years ago. There had been a young woman, roughly at Emma's current age, who had taken her hands and pulled her to the dance floor. Following the scene in her mind, it became clearer. They'd snuck away to steal candy from the kitchen, then made their way to the library to celebrate their very own feast between sweets and books. She had showed her all her favorite stories, kindling her passion for the written word. They'd done that every year, until that very year, when the girl had vanished from Emma's life. Forced into a marriage of convenience with a beast to ensure her kingdom's safety. And had never been seen afterwards.
"Belle?" she asked stunned and the woman's smile widened.
It was the same face, not that smooth as she recalled, but with fine wrinkles, her eyes a little wiser and sadder.
"Lady Belle?" Emma repeated, still astonished. "But you married the Dark One, the beast! Everyone believes that that monster killed you!"
Belle chuckled bitterly. "Killed me? That's what they're thinking there? He may be the Dark One, but he's simply a man who chose power over love. That's what dark magic does to you. It corrupts your soul and poisons it. There's love in everyone, Emma. Sometimes it's just buried under a thick layer of grief that leaves no room for another person."
She sighed. "I had to go. To lead my own life. Somewhere where he couldn't find me."
As Emma met her gaze, she saw Belle tear up and swiftly walked over to her. She gingerly touched her arm. How could someone let a woman of such beauty go? And how could Belle speak that gently of a man that had purchased her like a cow? Was that what love looked like? Crying over someone, even after being hurt like that?
"Now, look at you," Belle smiled. "You've grown up. What happened to your beautiful long hair?"
Actually, Emma was concerned about the fact that Belle had recognized her that quickly, but there was something else she had to tell her. Speaking of it still frightened her, but Belle deserved to know.
"I'm afraid my disguise is not for nothing. The Enchanted Forest has been invaded by an evil force. My parents have been killed and a new king is now occupying the throne. I have no idea what happened to my little brother, but I assume he's dead too." She saw Belle's eyes widen, but continued speaking. "Ruby, my bodyguard, rescued me. She tried to bring me to Arendelle, but we were separated by pirates. They hold me captive on their ship and force me to sail with them. They don't know who I am and still think I'm a boy."
She felt the knot in her throat tighten. "The captain locked me up so I can't escape but then Jake, one of the sailors, got bitten by a snake."
All at once she felt Belle's hands on her shoulders. "Slow down," she said, pulling her into a hug. Emma clung to her, feeling Belle's arms tighten around her and she pressed her head into her hair. It smelled of roses and soap, not like the sailor's dirty scent.
"I'm so sorry Emma," Belle whispered into her ear. Emma could discern Belle wasn't as shocked as she'd expected her to be. Who could blame her? She had probably experienced horrible things herself and had cut her ties years ago, physically and emotionally. And yet, she still cared about the man who was responsible for her pain.
Surprisingly, Emma didn't feel the urge to cry. She'd shed all her tears in that moment with Jake. She carefully slipped out of Belle's embrace, taking a step back.
"I'm fine," she declared. "I survived."
Belle nodded understandingly. She obviously knew what surviving meant. No matter how hard it was to proceed, it was necessary to leave the past behind.
"What happened to Ruby?"
"Apparently, she managed to find a ship to Arendelle. And I'm sure they're already searching for me. But the ocean is big and the Jolly Roger is fast."
Belle's eyes widened even more.
"Does that mean you were captured by Captain Hook?" she gasped. "Under no circumstances can you return to that ship!"
"But Jake's my friend!" Emma objected. She didn't know how to explain what had happened, after all she hadn't had time to process things.
"I'll send Dr. Johnston to him, if that's what you want. But Captain Hook is an evil man. If he'd found out who you are, he would have sold you to the highest bidder."
"How do you know?" Emma asked warily.
"I've met him once. He tried to kill me in order to take revenge on my husband, but he failed. This pirate's without mercy. His heart is rotten!"
Emma felt the urge to tell her what Jake had told her of Milah, but she held it back. Where did this come from? She should agree with Belle, not defend Hook.
"I will accompany the Doctor to the ship. I have to," she said instead. Belle had been a companion when she was a child, but she had no right to decide her fate. She knew that this was her ultimate chance to escape. But she made a promise to Jake and she wouldn't break it.
She raised her head, giving Belle a challenging look.
"You must be very fond of that friend," Belle finally said and Emma nodded.
"Well then, you're a grown woman. But rest assured that decision can only end in catastrophe."
"We'll see about that," Emma replied stubbornly and turned to the door, intending to wait with Clarke downstairs.
-/-
The doctor arrived twenty minutes later. He was a skinny and tall man around fifty, with sparse hair and round glasses. He'd brought a suitcase with antidotes, eager to get to the patient. Before they left, Belle had taken her aside and instructed her not to mention her name to the Captain. It hardly needed mentioning; Emma was intelligent enough to figure out that telling Hook of Belle wouldn't give her any advantages. After all this time, she knew how to act on that ship. There would be another possibility to escape, but first she had to focus on Jake.
On their way the doctor asked questions about the snake, how it had looked like, the form of the bite, time of the incident and the symptoms Jake had shown. As Emma explained it to him in as much details as possible, the doctor quickened his pace, but didn't say anything. It certainly didn't help to calm Emma's already heavily pounding heart. They didn't take the detour through the market place, but chose a way alongside the river, which wasn't that crowed.
Soon they could see the forest of masts in between the houses, and five minutes later they arrived at the docks. Emma needed a moment to find the Jolly Roger, but then she saw the familiar vessel swaying peacefully in the water. Wasting no time, she walked up the gangway, not waiting for Clarke and Dr. Johnston.
"Emmett!" she heard someone call her from the stern. Not taking notice of the sailors she made her way to the infirmary. Dr. Johnston seemed to understand his profession, and Emma was sure he knew the snake that had bitten Jake. He would give him the antidotes and Jake would be fine.
"Emmett!" the voice called again. It was Morren, and she would return later, but right now, she needed to check on Jake.
As she arrived at the hatch, Ramsay stepped in her way, touching her arm. "Don't," he said insistently. Alarmed by his voice, Emma looked up. Ramsay held her arm, not wanting to let her pass by. His face was contorted. He squeezed her arm, as if he wasn't able to continue speaking.
Emma's mouth opened slightly, trying to make sense of his expression as it dawned on her. She yanked her arm free and opened the hatch forcefully. Ramsay didn't make another attempt to stop her. Tumbling down the ladder, Emma stormed towards the cabin. In her rush, she almost fell over her own feet. Her head was spinning as panic overwhelmed her senses with every step. Her hand trembled when she pushed the door open and entered the room.
Hook was sitting on the stool next to the treatment table, slouching, his shoulders sagging. As he heard Emma entering, he looked up, watching her stoically as she stepped closer. Jake was enveloped in a blanket, his arms crossed on his chest. His eyes were closed as if he was sleeping, his features relaxed; almost peaceful.
Emma's lips trembled as she reached for his pulse, already knowing she wouldn't find one. His skin was pale, and the lips she'd kissed a week ago were already losing their color, but his skin was still warm and Emma couldn't help herself. She mechanically reached for his arm to inspect the wound. She turned the limp arm in her hands.
"Emmett," Hook said quietly, but Emma didn't listen and kept touching Jake until she felt Hooks rough hand on hers. "Stop it."
Emma winced as she heard Dr. Johnston entering. He walked towards them, subtly indicating her to move, so he could examine the patient. What was he thinking? It wasn't as if he could do anything other than record the death.
"You're not needed here," she suddenly said through clenched teeth. "You can leave!"
Opposite of her, Hook rose from his chair and walked around the table, but Emma couldn't stop.
"We don't need another doctor here!" she spat out.
It wasn't right that this old man was standing at the treatment table, opening his suitcase to take out all the instruments as if this was his domain. It should be Jake standing here, doing all these things, not this stranger. Emma had read about it in the book and knew the procedure to determine a death correctly. She could see the white papers used to certify death in a side pocket of his bag. The document that would make it official. Her body shook as the doctor refused to listen to her and she opened her mouth to repeat herself.
This time, she was interrupted by a hand and hook slightly pulling at her shoulders.
"Come with me," Hook said softly but Emma refused to obey, digging her feet in the ground, not wanting to move an inch.
"Emmett please," he said again, and nudged her slightly towards the entrance. The grip on her shoulders was firm, and finally Emma gave in. Simply because she no longer had the strength to put up a fight.
She wordlessly let Hook lead her through the ship. He didn't take the path above the deck and not through the crew's quarters either, but chose a detour through the food stores in order to avoid an encounter with a crew member.
When they arrived at his cabin, he guided her towards one of the armchairs. He put two glasses on the table and reached for his flask, pouring the entire content into the two glasses. He shoved the drink towards her and sat down. Clinking his glass with hers, he leaned back and took a gulp. Emma did the same. The rum burned her throat, but it didn't drown the thoughts that were consuming her.
"When?" was all she could get out.
Hook turned the glass in his hand. "An hour ago, shortly after you left."
Emma swallowed, shaking her head to fight the numbness spreading in her head.
"I was too slow. I lingered for a bloody conversation."
"Nobody would have reached for a doctor that shortly. If anything was too slow, it was the Jolly Roger. And as the captain of this ship, you can blame that on me."
Emma downed the rest of her drink with the next gulp.
"You wanted to get rid of him anyway," she said motionless. "Now you can even keep his wage for yourself."
She expected Hook to snap, threaten her with flogging or even go through with it, but he only returned her look, somehow sad.
"Is that how you think of me?" he suddenly asked. "As a heartless man that doesn't care for anyone on this ship?"
"Why abandon him then?" she asked bluntly. "This ship was the only home he had left. You might as well have made him walk the plank. It wouldn't have made any difference."
Bitterness encompassed his gaze.
"Who are you to judge me? You have been onboard for how long? About two months? And you claim to know me and my ties to my men?"
"I know how you treat me," she replied brusquely. "You knew I was in a desperate situation when you found me. And you enjoyed it for no purpose. You separated me from my sister just for fun. And you keep taking every single person I care about away from me. You don't need me on this ship. I'm a worthless cabin boy. If someone had to go, why not me instead of Jake?
"Mr. Felton was the older one," Hook replied angrily. "He was supposed to know the rules on this -"
"Bullshit!" Emma cut him short. "This was never about the kiss. Or him. For some reason you keep up this game."
She thrusted the empty glass on the table. "Well then, Captain. You won. I don't know what the purpose of this is, but I surrender. Flog me or do whatever you want, I don't care anymore. You did enough to scare me off. You could have chased me off the ship at that food market. Then Jake would still be alive and doing his job, as he's supposed to do. Not lying there, dead -"
She sniveled and narrowed her eyes to slits, trying to hold back the tears. But then she changed her mind. Why pretend to be strong while reaching her breaking point. Soon he would know everything about her, and be able to sell her to the highest bidder, be it Elsa or her enemies. At least she would be able to leave the ship then.
Hook didn't respond. She realized it after several minutes when she'd shed all the tears she'd held back for the past months, when she had endured all his humiliations, always hoping that his feigned mood-swings would stop. By now she understood them for what they were, a mask, not more than pretending, and a lie, meant to frighten and to discipline her.
Raising her head, she met his pensive gaze. There again, she caught that glimpse of sadness she'd seen earlier.
"My first time on a ship was at the age of eight," Hook suddenly said. His voice was lower than before and Emma brushed the tears off her face, finally able to listen.
"I was traveling with my father and my brother. At least that was what I thought. When I woke up in the middle of the night, I learned that my father was gone. He sold us into servitude. The crew were rough fellows, not even close to what you can call a family. They shoved us on deck, presenting us to their captain, in the middle of the night, laughing and growling around. I have never been more afraid in my entire life. I was kneeling on the planks, certain my life would be over soon. My brother Liam stood up in front of them. I don't remember what he said, but he shielded me from them. Ever since, my brother never left my side. We even went on to serve together in the Navy." He paused, to gather himself. "It was a day in late August when he died. We were on a mission to collect a poisonous plant for the king. He died because of a mistake I made. And I can never take it back." He sighed. "It was unreal when I saw you that night, kneeling behind your sister, showing that exact same fear, but also the same trust that she would keep you safe."
Emma swallowed; she couldn't speak and so he continued.
"You were two lost souls, and like us, abandoned by the world. But this is a pirate ship, a dangerous place. People die here all the time. You know now of what I speak of. Imagine if it had been your sister. Imagine if she was here and was the one who'd been bitten by the snake."
Emma felt fresh tears rising and shook her head. "Don't do this."
"Now you get what I mean. I couldn't provide shelter for the two of you. In addition, this is a pirate ship. You had a higher chance of survival. Because that's what people like us do. We survive."
Emma inhaled sharply. Had he treated her like this to make her tough to ensure her survival? Was this his twisted way of caring about someone?
"So when you offered me the deal, I took it. I made sure that your sister left the ship safely and found a ship to return."
"You gambled with our fates first," Emma snorted.
Hook shook his head with a sad smile.
"I never gambled over anything. Don't you remember what I told you as a pirate's first rule? Always negotiate with the intention to get what you want. Never let coincidence decide what you get, and call it fate. You determine your own fate. It's you alone."
"I don't understand."
"I rigged the game. You were exhausted; it was very easy. I own all kinds of loaded dice. When I saw you weren't paying attention I exchanged the dice and made sure you would win the game. You're right, I could've just agreed to your deal, but I had to make a point. Frighten you a little bit. Getting used to the fear was what you had to learn. It's what makes us stronger. And you did well. I've never seen someone get accustomed to that way of life that fast. You've been a natural in the rigging and you managed to win over the crew in no time. Jake told me you have the intelligence to become a fabulous doctor. The day I took you in, I decided to do right by you. To teach you to be a sailor during the time we agreed upon and then let you choose if you want to remain on this path. That was what I told Jake last week. It was then that he insisted that he should be the one to leave the ship."
"He insisted on it?" Emma whispered.
"Aye, he said you did deserve better than him."
"What?"
Hook hesitated. "Consider this the hour of truth. There is something else I haven't told you yet. Shortly before Jake passed, he woke up. There was something lingering in his soul. Something he probably didn't want me to tell you. But since the two of you seemed to be …close… I think you deserve to know his secret."
*I borrowed the name from an ancient Egyptian city.