It's already Sunday.
I've been getting increasingly anxious about Yuri's upcoming visit.
I keep telling myself there's no reason to be nervous, but it doesn't help much.
Yuri is clearly an introvert and also an intimate person in general.
There's no doubt that she'll open up a little bit when it's just the two of us.
Meanwhile, we've even been texting occasionally.
She was extremely apprehensive at first, but it wasn't long before I was already learning more about her.
But putting Yuri aside...
I haven't heard a thing from Sayori since she left club early the other day.
I've been worried about her in the back of my mind.
Between what Sayori said, and what Monika said...
Is it really okay for me to put Sayori's feelings aside when she might need me?
I decide to visit Sayori before Yuri comes over.
Rather than asking, I simply tell her "I'm coming over", much like we've done in the past.
Once I reach Sayori's house, I knock on the door before entering it myself.
Again, we used to play so often that we've made it a habit of simply entering each other's houses like we were family.
The house is quiet.
Sayori isn't anywhere on the first floor, so I assume she's up in her room.
It's already strange of her not to run down and greet me.
I head up to her bedroom, where I finally find her.
You: Sayori?
Sayori: Hi~
I sit down in her room.
Sayori forces a smile, but it's easy to tell that she's different.
There's a minute of silence between us.
Sayori: You haven't come over like this in a long time, have you?
You: Ah... I guess you're right.
You: It has been a long time.
You: Not much has really changed, has it?
Sayori's room is as messy as it's always been.
I also recognize the same stuffed animals and wall decorations that she's had for years now.
Sayori: Ehehe~
Sayori: If you came over more often, it wouldn't be such a mess.
You: That's because I end up cleaning it for you...
Sayori: How come you suddenly wanted to come over today?
Sayori: Aren't you supposed to see Yuri today?
You: Yeah, but...
You: ...Wait, how did you know that?
Sayori had already left by the time we decided that last meeting.
Sayori: Monika told me.
Sayori: It's only natural for her to keep me informed about the festival preparations, right?
You: Ah, that's true...
You: But what about you?
You: Aren't you going to be helping Monika today?
Sayori: Of course!
Sayori: But I'm just helping her online.
Sayori: We didn't plan to meet up or anything.
You: Ah, so it's just me and Yuri, then...
Sayori: Yep~
There's more silence between us.
Sayori stares in a random direction.
Everything about her behavior is really uncharacteristic.
I finally get to the point.
You: I just...wanted to see how you were doing.
You: After you left on Friday.
You: When something's wrong, you can't hide it from me!
You: I know you too well.
You: So...
Sayori smiles, shaking her head.
Sayori: That's no good.
You: Eh?
Sayori: Why can't it just be like it's always been?
Sayori: This is all my fault.
Sayori: If I didn't get so weak and accidentally express my feelings...
Sayori: If I didn't make that stupid mistake...
Sayori: Then you wouldn't have been worried about me at all.
Sayori: You wouldn't have come here.
Sayori: You wouldn't have even been thinking about me right now.
Sayori: But this...is just my punishment, isn't it?
Sayori: I'm getting punished for being so selfish.
Sayori: I think that's why the world decided to have you come over today.
Sayori: It just wants to torture me.
Sayori: Ehehe~
You: Sayori!
I grab Sayori by the shoulders.
You: What on Earth are you saying?!
You: Are you listening to yourself right now?
You: I know something happened to you.
You: There's no other explanation for you to be like this.
You: So tell me, already...!
You: Until I know, I won't be able to stop thinking about it!
Sayori: Ah...
Sayori: Ahaha...
Sayori gives me an empty smile.
Sayori: You really put me in a trap.
Sayori: But...
Sayori: You're wrong.
Sayori: Nothing happened to me.
Sayori: I've always been like this.
Sayori: You're just seeing it for the first time.
You: Seeing what?
You: What are you talking about, Sayori?
Sayori: Ehehe~
Sayori: You're really just going to make me say it, aren't you?
Sayori: I guess I have no choice this time.
Sayori: The thing is...
Sayori: I've had really bad depression my whole life.
Sayori: Did you know that?
Sayori: Why do you think I'm late to school every day?
Sayori: Because most days, I can't even find a reason to get out of bed.
Sayori: What reason is there to do anything when I fully know how worthless I am?
Sayori: Why go to school?
Sayori: Why eat?
Sayori: Why make friends?
Sayori: Why make other people put their energy and caring to waste by having them spend it on me?
Sayori: That's what it feels like.
Sayori: And that's why I just want to make everyone happy...
Sayori: Without anyone worrying about me.
You: ...
I'm in shock.
I can't even figure out how to respond.
How is it possible that Sayori kept this from me the entire time that I've known her?
Did she really want so badly for me to just not think about her?
You: ...Why, Sayori?
Sayori: Eh...?
You: Why is it that you've never told me about this?
You: It almost feels like I've been betrayed as your close friend.
You: Because if I knew, I would have done everything I could to support you!
You: Even if there's only so much that I could do...
You: I would have tried a little bit harder to make every day a little better for you.
You: That's why I'm your friend!
You: All you had to do was tell me!
Sayori: You don't understand at all.
Sayori: Why do you think I didn't tell you?
Sayori: Because if I told you, then you would have to waste effort caring about me instead of doing important things.
Sayori: I don't want to be cared about.
Sayori: It's bittersweet, when people try to care about me.
Sayori: It feels nice sometimes.
Sayori: But it also feels like a bat being swung against my head.
Sayori: Ahaha~
Sayori: That's why I wanted so badly for you to make friends with everyone else...
Sayori: Helping everyone be happy together is the best thing for me.
Sayori: But then, I discovered something else, too.
Sayori: Seeing you make friends and get closer with everyone in the club...
Sayori: It feels like a spear going through my heart.
Sayori: So, that's why.
Sayori: That's why I decided the world just wants to torture me.
Sayori: Every path leads to nothing but hurt.
Sayori: Ahaha~
You: You're right that I don't understand...
You: I don't understand your feelings at all, Sayori.
You: But I don't need to understand.
You: Whatever it takes for me to help you stop hurting...
You: That's what I'll do.
Sayori: No.
Sayori: There's nothing.
Sayori: Nothing at all.
Sayori: The only thing that could have helped is if everything could be like it always was.
Sayori: But I was selfish.
Sayori: I finally showed you what a horrible person I am.
Tears streak down Sayori's face.
Sayori: I made you join the literature club because I was selfish.
Sayori: And I was punished by my heart hurting in a way that I couldn't understand.
Sayori: And now you came here and I made you hurt, too.
Sayori: I'm just weak and selfish.
Sayori: That's all I am.
Sayori: And that's why I'm going to accept these punishments.
Sayori: Because I deserve every last one...!
Without thinking, I once again grab Sayori's shoulders.
This time, I pull her into a tight embrace.
Sayori: A-Ah-
You: Sayori.
You: I don't care if you feel selfish.
You: I'm really happy that you convinced me to join the club.
You: Seeing you every day makes it worthwhile enough.
You: If I make friends with everyone else, then that's just a bonus.
You: But please never underestimate how much I care about you.
You: I wouldn't have it any other way.
Sayori isn't hugging me back.
Despite my arms being wrapped around her, Sayori's arms remain at her sides.
She starts sobbing next to my ear.
Sayori: No...
Sayori: Don't do this...to me...
Sayori: Please don't do this...
Sayori: I...
Sayori barely manages to speak between her sobs.
I don't know if I'm doing the right thing.
But all I want is for her to know that I care.
You: If you have it in you to call yourself selfish, then you have to let me be selfish too.
You: No matter what it takes, I'll figure out what needs to change.
You: I'll make these feelings go away.
You: And if there's anything that you need me to do...
You: Then you'd better tell me.
You: I'll get mad if you don't.
Sayori: ...
Sayori: I...don't know...
Sayori: I don't know...
Sayori: I don't know.
Gently, Sayori finally puts her arms around me in return.
Sayori: I don't know anything.
Sayori: It's all really scary...
Sayori: I don't understand any of my feelings...
Sayori: The only time I'm not feeling nothing is when I'm feeling pain.
Sayori: But...
Sayori: Your hugs are so warm...
Sayori lets me go.
As she does so, I let her go as well.
You: The festival is tomorrow.
Sayori: Yeah...
You: It's going to be fun, right?
Sayori: Yeah.
You: How would you like for me to spend it all with you?
Sayori: U-Um...
Sayori: Ah-
You: It's what I want.
You: I promise.
Sayori: I...
Sayori: I think that would be nice, then...
You: Yeah.
Sayori wipes her eyes.
If I could spend the whole day here, I would.
You: Of all days, this has to be the one where I have other plans...
You: Maybe I should cancel-
Sayori: No, don't-!
Sayori: Please don't...
Sayori: If you did that...then I really wouldn't forgive you.
You: But...
You: It's almost time for Yuri to meet me at my house...
You: At the very least, do you want to come along and help out?
You: It would be fun.
To my surprise, Sayori shakes her head.
Sayori: I'm sorry.
Sayori: I don't know if that would be very good for me today.
Sayori: You understand, right?
You: Ah...
You: It's...kind of hard for me to fully understand.
You: But I'm trying my hardest.
Sayori: It's okay.
Sayori: Don't worry too much about it.
Sayori: I'll see you tomorrow, okay?
You: ...Alright.
You: I look forward to it.
I say goodbye to Sayori and exit her house.
On the way home, I find myself still feeling uneasy.
But it's hard for me to keep thinking about it when Yuri is about to come over, too...
I think Sayori is right.
I shouldn't be worrying too much, and we're definitely going to have a great time tomorrow.
I should just focus on what's ahead of me!
Before I know it, Yuri texts me to let me know she's outside the front door.
Without delay, I open the front door to let her in.
You: I see you brought a lot of stuff with you.
Yuri: That's right.
Yuri: And did you manage to find everything I asked you to buy as well?
You: Yeah, pretty much.
You: At least, I hope I got everything right.
Yuri: I'm sure it will be fine.
I take Yuri to my room.
The first thing she does is glance around curiously, which makes me feel anxious.
Yuri: It's so clean...
You: Ahaha...
You: I cleaned it before you came over, so...
Yuri: That's very considerate of you to do.
You: Ah, no...
You: I would be really embarrassed for my room to be a mess while you were here.
Yuri: Hmm...
Yuri: Well, I do enjoy cleaning...
Yuri: I would have gladly helped you clean.
You: Ah-
You: That would be even more embarrassing!
You: Wait, don't look in there-!
I snatch Yuri's wrist, which was in the process of opening a desk drawer of mine.
Yuri: A-Ah...
Yuri: I'm sorry...!
Yuri: I wasn't thinking for some reason...
Yuri: I was just spacing out!
You: It's fine, it's fine...
I let go of Yuri's wrist.
She puts both of her hands firmly in her lap, as if making sure she's keeping track of them.
You: So, um...
You: Should we...get started?
Yuri: Ah...
Yuri: Yes...
Yuri: Um, I have a few things planned that you can help with...
Yuri: Decorations and other atmospheric enhancements.
You: Atmospheric enhancements...?
Yuri: You know...
Yuri: Mood lighting, aromatherapy candles...
You: Oh, wow.
You: I didn't know you planned on taking it that far.
Yuri: Of course.
Yuri: I want to help take our guests to a faraway place.
Yuri: Although many will stop by just out of curiosity...
Yuri: And for...cupcakes, I guess...
Yuri: I'm determined to provide an experience that will leave them wanting more.
You: That's great.
You: It's easy to forget that you're a pretty intense person.
Yuri: Ah-
Yuri: Intense...?
You: I guess that's the best way to put it.
Yuri: Is that...a bad thing?
You: No, not at all.
You: It's something that I like about you, actually.
Yuri: I-Is that so...?
Yuri: That makes me feel relieved...
Yuri: And kind of happy...
You: Yeah, no need to be so anxious.
You: You can relax a little.
Yuri: Relax...
Yuri: I brought some things for relaxation.
Yuri: I was going to use them during the poetry event...
You: Oh yeah? Like what?
Yuri: Let's see...
Yuri rummages through her bag.
She pulls out a few candles and a wooden cylinder-shaped object.
Yuri: I did some shopping on the way here, so I happen to have these in my bag.
Yuri: I planned to cover the windows in black paper and use the candles to light the room.
Yuri: I think that would be amazing, don't you?
You: Yeah, that would be really neat.
You: What's that wooden thing, though?
Yuri: Oh, this?
Yuri: It's a diffuser for essential oils.
Yuri: How familiar are you with aromatherapy?
You: Not familiar at all...
Yuri: Ah, is that so?
Yuri: It's one of my favorite contributors to a positive atmosphere.
Yuri: Depending on the oils or herbs you choose, you can change the mood of the air itself.
Yuri: You can even feel it permeate through your body.
Yuri: Relaxation, positive energy, romance, reflection...
Yuri: It's almost like magic.
Yuri takes the cylinder and pushes a switch on the bottom.
In just a moment, a thin ray of vapor begins to spout through a small hole on the top.
You: Wow, that smells wonderful.
You: What kind of mood is that one for?
Yuri: This is a Jasmine essential oil.
Yuri: It smells a little sweet and flowery, right?
You: Yeah, that's a good way to describe it.
Yuri: I chose Jasmine for the event because it provides more than relaxation.
Yuri: Jasmine enhances your emotions and helps you feel them flow through your body.
Yuri: You feel warmer, and your heart pounds more heavily.
Yuri: Don't you think that will be perfect for sharing our poems?
You: It does sound suitable...
You: But you seem to know a lot about this, so I'll trust your opinion with anything.
Yuri smiles gently, clearly enjoying herself.
She again reaches into her bag and pulls out several spools of thin ribbon.
You: What are those for?
Yuri: Well...
Yuri: Did you purchase the origami paper I asked you to get?
You: Yeah, I have it over here...
Yuri: We won't be using the paper for folding origami.
Yuri: What I'd like to do is write a different word on each paper.
Yuri: We'll need about a hundred of them.
You: Oh yeah?
You: What will those be used for?
Yuri: Well, I'm going to cut pieces of ribbon to hang from the doorway of the classroom.
Yuri: Then, we can fasten the paper onto the ribbons to create a doorway curtain.
Yuri: Wouldn't that be beautiful?
Yuri: It would also catch the eye of those passing by the room...
Yuri: It may attract some to peek inside.
You: That's really creative!
You: I had no idea you'd be so good at this, Yuri.
Yuri: Is...that so?
Yuri: Well, I suppose I do get a little intense...as you'd put it.
Yuri: Uhuhu.
Yuri giggles with red cheeks.
Is it just me, or is she more relaxed when it's just the two of us?
Or maybe it's the excitement she feels from sharing something that she enjoys.
Yuri: Here's a marker
Yuri: You can write any characters you want.
Yuri: I'll help you once I finish cutting the ribbons.
You: Ah, alright.
Sitting on the floor together, the two of us get to work.
I carefully draw a different character on each paper, doing my best to manage my bad handwriting.
Yuri unravels a long strand of red ribbon to her desired length.
Then, she reaches into her bag once more and pulls out a pocket knife.
You: Eh...?
The knife is strangely beautiful.
The silver handle has an intricate pattern of waves etched into it.
The blade itself is gently tinted blue.
You: That's no ordinary pocket knife...
You: It looks really fancy.
Yuri: A-Ah...
Yuri: Well...
Embarrassed, Yuri looks away.
You: What is it?
Yuri: You're going to think it's weird...
You: Yuri, whatever it is, I have no reason to judge.
You: To each their own, you know?
Yuri: If you promise you won't be weirded out...
You: Yeah, I promise.
Yuri: Alright...
Yuri: The thing is, I'm kind of into knives...
Yuri: They're just...so pretty...
Yuri: I-I can't help it!
Yuri: I don't know what it is...
Yuri: The combination of craftsmanship and feeling of danger, maybe...
Yuri: Uu, what am I saying...?
Yuri: Please don't think I'm weird for this...
You: Ahaha.
Yuri: You're laughing at me...
You: No, I'm not laughing at you.
You: It's just funny how nervous you got about sharing.
You: It's...well, it's an interesting thing to be into, I guess.
You: But I think it kind of suits you.
Yuri: Suits me...?
You: Yeah... It's kind of intense. Ahaha.
You: Besides, it's a really cool-looking knife, I can't deny that.
Yuri: It is, isn't it...?
Yuri relaxes her expression once again.
Yuri: Would you like to hold it?
You: Sure, I'll check it out.
Yuri carefully hands me the knife, with the handle facing me.
I take it and turn it around in my hands.
It feels heavy, and extremely solid.
Where do you even get a knife like this...?
Curious of its sharpness, I feel the point of the knife with my index finger.
You: Ow-!
Yuri: Why did you do that?!
You: I didn't expect it to be that sharp...!
You: I barely touched it at all.
Yuri: I-It's my fault!
Yuri: I should have warned you...
Yuri: This knife is extremely sharp...
Yuri: It can cut through skin like it's paper.
Yuri: Oh no...
A small drop of blood trickles down the side of my finger.
Yuri takes my hand and gives the wound a closer look.
Yuri: Ah...
She stares at it and noticeably fidgets.
You: If you're squeamish, I'll go wash it off now-
You: A-Ah!
Without warning, Yuri puts my finger in her mouth and licks the wound.
I feel her tongue curl around my finger.
Startled, I instinctively pull my hand back.
Yuri: O-Oh...
Yuri: P-Please forgive me!
Yuri: I wasn't thinking!
Yuri: I...
Yuri lowers her head, her face burning up.
You: Yuri...
Yuri: That's the most embarrassing thing I've ever done...
Yuri: How could I do something like that?
Yuri: I'm sorry, I'm sorry...
You: Ah...
Sure, it was a little weird, and it took me by surprise...
But I guess she was just trying to help, right...?
You: Yuri, I think you're overreacting a little...
Yuri: Uuuh...
She doesn't lift her head.
What if she doesn't recover from this for the rest of the afternoon?
You: Alright, you know what...
This might be a stupid thing to do, but I do it anyway.
I take Yuri's hand and lick her index finger in return.
Yuri: D-Did you really just do that?
You: N-Now we're even...
Yuri: ...
Yuri just looks at me like I did something wrong.
You: Ahaha...
You: I knew that would be a bad idea...
If not for the sweet aroma of the Jasmine oil, the air would be extremely heavy right now.
Yuri: You're so weird.
Yuri giggles shyly.
You: Eh...?
Yuri calling me weird?
I have no response to that...
Yuri: Where do you keep your bandages?
You: Ah...
You: I don't think I need one, actually.
You: It was a tiny cut.
You: Look, it already stopped bleeding.
Yuri: I see...
Yuri: That's relieving.
The tension is quickly lifted.
Yuri: Hey, I wanted to ask you something.
You: What's that?
Yuri: Have you noticed something up with Monika lately?
To be honest, I don't Monika that well. I've only known her in passing and never spent time with her.
You: I can't really say, why?
Yuri: Something just seems off to me.
Yuri: Like she's lying to us about something.
You: What do you mean?
Yuri: Playing a harp shouldn't be causing that much damage to one's fingers.
You: What do you think it is then?
Yuri: I don't know, but the marks on her fingers aren't just a harp.
You: How would you know?
Yuri: Uh...
Yuri: Just call it a woman's intuition.
Yuri: Besides, it's not like I'd know too much about that kind of stuff.
We each resume our respective activities.
I watch Yuri's knife cut through the ribbon like it's nothing but air.
Meanwhile, I continue to make progress on the paper.
After we finish attaching the paper to the ribbons, we lay them all out side by side.
It looks better than I expected and will be very effective as a door curtain.
You: It looks great.
You: Good thinking coming up with this, Yuri.
Yuri: Ah, thanks...
Yuri: It's just something I saw online, really.
Yuri: Are you ready to move onto the next task?
You: Yeah, let's do it.
You: What do you have in mind?
Yuri: I'd like to create a banner.
Yuri: That's why I asked you to buy the paint tablets.
You: Ah, that's right.
One of the items Yuri had asked me to buy was a kit of watercolor paint tablets.
Yuri: We'll need about six cups of water to put each of the tablets in.
Yuri: Do you mind fetching those for us?
You: Of course not.
You: Six cups of water...
You: I'll be right back in a minute.
Yuri: Thank you very much.
Yuri: Oh, and just a little bit of water is okay.
Yuri: If you fill the cups too much, it will be too diluted.
Taking Yuri's advice, I decide to use small plastic bathroom cups rather than full-sized glasses.
I put them on a plate to catch any paint that drips, then bring it back into my room.
You: Yuri?
Yuri: Yes?
I come in to see Yuri quickly unrolling her sleeve, pulling it back over her arm.
You: Ah, nothing...
You: Your face is a little red.
You: Is it too hot in here, or anything?
Yuri: Ah-
Yuri: No, not at all!
Yuri: There's nothing wrong, so...
Yuri: Let's mix the paint.
Yuri hurriedly dismisses me and takes it upon herself to unwrap the tablets, dropping them into the cups.
Yuri: So...
Yuri: I thought we would do something simple that would look very nice.
Yuri: I'd like to paint a gradient across the banner...
Yuri: Starting with the colors for a sunrise, then daytime, then sunset and nighttime.
Yuri: Once it dries, I'll write an inspirational quote across the banner.
Yuri: We can hang it on the wall behind the podium at the front of the classroom.
You: Ah, neat.
You: What are you going to write?
Yuri: Well...
Yuri: ...It will be more fun to surprise you.
Yuri smiles at me.
You: If you say so...
After rolling out the banner, Yuri and I kneel on opposite sides so we don't get in the way of each other.
Yuri uses a brush and adds a few dots of different colors across the banner to serve as a color guide when we paint.
You: This kind of reminds me of elementary school...
Painting on a banner with watercolors feels a lot like the art class projects we had back then.
It's relaxing.
Yuri: Ah...
Yuri: I'm sorry if this feels too childish...!
You: No, I didn't mean that at all.
You: It's kind of fun, you know?
Yuri: ...Yeah.
Yuri: It is fun.
Yuri: I'm glad you feel that way, too.
Yuri stops painting for a moment, thinking to herself.
Yuri: For me...
Yuri: I don't need to go out and do crazy things to have fun.
Yuri: In fact, I usually don't even want to.
Yuri: I just like when I can spend time with one other person...
Yuri: Even if it's something simple, like reading - it doesn't even matter if we don't talk much.
Yuri: Just having a friend next to me makes things feel a little bit nicer.
Yuri: I think that's all it takes for me to be happy.
You: Is that so...?
Even if Yuri and I are quite different, I can understand where she's coming from.
I feel that way about things like anime and games, where simply sharing the experience with someone can make me happy.
You: I think I feel the same way.
Yuri smiles gently.
Yuri: I knew you'd understand...
Yuri leans over the banner to grab an unused paintbrush.
But I move at the same time, causing my head to bump into hers.
Yuri: Kya-!
You: S-Sorry!
Yuri reels back, and I quickly lift my hands in surprise.
You: Are you hurt?
Yuri: N-No, I'm not hurt.
Yuri: It just startled me...that's all.
Yuri: Sorry, I should have asked you to get it for me...
You: It's not your fault.
You: Ah, your face...
There are droplets of paint on Yuri's face and neck.
Yuri: Is there something on my face?
You: Yeah, I accidentally got paint on you...
You: Sorry, it's totally my fault!
You: I'll get a towel right away.
I rush out and fetch a small towel, then I dampen it with hot water.
I return to my room and kneel back down in front of her.
You: Here...
I pat down Yuri's face and neck with the towel.
Yuri: Ah-
You: Is something wrong?
Yuri: It's hot...I just didn't expect it.
You: Sorry...
You: I didn't want to use cold water.
Having finished, I start to retract my hand.
But Yuri suddenly holds my wrist.
Yuri: Wait-
You: Eh?
Yuri: Just...for a little longer.
Yuri: It feels really nice...
You: Ah...
I keep my hand still against Yuri's neck.
She looks into my eyes.
It's an intense expression that I recognize from when she reads her books...
Almost as if she's lost in a daze, enveloped by her own thoughts.
She breathes gently, half through slightly-parted lips.
What is happening...?
Is it the aroma of the Jasmine oil giving me this dizzy feeling?
Yuri's gentle fingers, wrapped around my wrist, send a tingling sensation through my arm.
And suddenly, her face seems to be much closer to mine than it was just a moment ago...
Yuri: Ah...
Yuri slowly pulls away.
Yuri: Sorry...
Yuri: I've been feeling a little light-headed today.
Yuri: I didn't mean to space out...
You: I-It's fine...
The moment is over as soon as it began.
Yuri picks up her brush again.
But her movements seem clumsier, like she's unable to focus.
I remain silent, forced to ignore the event that just transpired.
I hesitantly retrieve my own brush and continue following Yuri's example.
You: That should do it...
I finish filling the night sky with white dots that looks like stars.
Looking at the banner as a whole, it's very pretty and natural-looking.
Yuri: I think it came out better than I expected.
Yuri: I'm really happy with the results.
You: Yeah, me too.
You: Are you going to add the lettering now?
Yuri: Ah, not yet...
Yuri: It needs to dry first.
You: That's true, but won't that take a while?
Yuri: Well...
Yuri: Perhaps it would be best to leave it here, then have you bring it in the morning.
Yuri: I can do the lettering in the classroom before our event starts.
Yuri: Is that okay?
You: That's totally fine.
Yuri: Wonderful.
Yuri: In that case...
Yuri: I don't think there's anything more for us to do here.
You: Phew.
Yuri: Ahaha.
Yuri: You say that like you're glad it's over.
Yuri: Was I wrong to assume that you were at least enjoying yourself a little bit?
You: Ah, no, it's not that.
You: I'm just glad that we managed to get everything done.
Yuri: I see.
Yuri: I am, too.
Yuri: I was a little concerned about time...
Yuri: I need to start making dinner soon.
You: Ah...
You: So you don't have any time left?
I was secretly hoping we would have extra time after finishing the work...
Yuri: Well...
Yuri: ...
Yuri thinks to herself.
Yuri: I-I think it would be too irresponsible of me to wait much longer...
Yuri: I'm sorry!
Yuri: I was hoping there would be more time as well...
You: It's probably my fault.
You: Sorry for being such a slow worker.
Yuri: No, it's not your fault at all.
Yuri: And...the important thing is that we got everything done, right?
You: Yeah...
Yuri: So...
Yuri: I shouldn't be disappointed...or anything.
Gathering all her things, Yuri seems to look a little downcast.
I understand why.
It sounded like she rarely gets the opportunity to spend time with friends in a relaxed environment.
But that doesn't mean this is the last time it can happen...
Once Yuri packs up, I walk her out the front door.
Yuri: Thank you very much for having me today.
You: No problem, I'm glad I was able to help.
You: Just let me know if there's anything else you need me to bring tomorrow.
Yuri: I will.
Yuri: Well, then...
Yuri fidgets.
Yuri: I guess...I'll see you tomorrow.
You: Wait-
I kind of say that without thinking.
You: About today...
You: It's fine that we didn't have as much time as we wanted.
You: Because we can do this again.
You: Whenever you want, you can come over, or we can go out somewhere-
You: Ah, I forgot you don't like going out much-
As I stumble over my words, Yuri simply smiles bashfully.
You: Anyway...
You: You know what I'm trying to say, so...
Yuri: You're very thoughtful.
Yuri takes a step closer to me, then briefly squeezes my hand.
Yuri: I kind of like that about you...
You: Well...
How am I supposed to respond to that?
But I don't even get a chance to, as Yuri suddenly pulls back.
Yuri: S-Sayori-?
You: Eh?!
Sayori: Ah...
Sayori: H-Hi...
You: Sayori-!
You: Just now, we weren't-
Sayori: Ehehe~
Sayori: It's okay.
Sayori: I just stopped by to say hi~
Yuri: U-Um...
Yuri: Well, it's nice to see you...
Yuri: I'm sorry, but I'm already on my way to leave!
Sayori: Aw, really?
Sayori: That's too bad...
Yuri: I'm sorry...
Yuri: But we'll all be together at the festival tomorrow, so...
Yuri: So that's fine, right?
Sayori: Of course!
Sayori beams.
Yuri: Y-Yeah, so...
Yuri: I'll see you tomorrow!
Clearly embarrassed, Yuri hurries off.
Sayori waves goodbye after her.
You: Sayori-
You: I thought you didn't want to come over today!
Sayori: Ahaha, well...
Sayori: I tried staying in my room...
Sayori: But my imagination was being really mean to me...
Sayori: So I had to come here and see it for myself.
You: See what?
You: What are you talking about?
Sayori: You know...
Sayori: How much fun you were having with.
Sayori: And how close you got to her.
Sayori: It makes me...really happy...
Sayori: That you've made such good friends.
Sayori: That's all that matters to me.
Tears start to fall down Sayori's face.
Sayori: That's all that matters to me-!
Sayori: Why am I feeling this way?
Sayori: I'm supposed to be happy for you.
Sayori: Why does it feel like my heart is splitting in half?
Sayori: It hurts so much...
Sayori: Everything hurts so much...
Sayori: This would be so much better if I could just disappear!
You: Sayori, don't say that!
Sayori: It's true!
Sayori: If I wasn't here, then you wouldn't have to waste your sympathy on me!
Sayori: You wouldn't have to put up with me being selfish!
Sayori: Monika was wrong...
Sayori: I should just...
You: Monika...?
You: Monika was wrong about what?
Sayori: ...
You: Sayori...
You: What I said before is true.
You: I'm not going to let this continue.
You: Caring about you like this isn't the burden your mind is making it out to be.
You: It's something that makes me happy.
You: It's something that I wouldn't trade for anything else.
You: So, even if it takes an entire lifetime...
You: I'm going to be by your side until you don't feel any more pain.
Sayori: B-But...
Sayori looks away.
I put a hand on her shoulder to reassure her.
Sayori: I'm scared...
Sayori: I'm really scared...
You: What are you scared of, Sayori?
Sayori: I'm scared that...
Sayori: That I might like you more than you like me...
You: Sayori...?
Sayori: It's true, isn't it?
Sayori: I was weak and started to like you too much...
Sayori: I did this to myself.
Sayori: I like you so much that I can't stand it!
Sayori: That's how I feel!
Sayori: And...and...
You: That's enough, Sayori...
You: I don't want you to hurt anymore.
I slide my hand down Sayori's arm and squeeze her hand in my own.
You: Do you remember how I said I always know what's best for you?
You: Do you still believe me?
Wordlessly, Sayori nods.
You: Even if you don't understand all of your own feelings...
You: I know what you need the most right now.
You: And that's what I'm going to give to you.
You: Sayori...
You: You'll always be my dearest friend.
You: What you need most is for things to be like they've always been.
You: Monika told me the truth...
You: She told me how much happier you seemed after I joined the club.
You: I know you're struggling with some really difficult feelings right now.
You: But...
You: Please trust me that I know what's best...and what will make you happy in the end.
You: I promise I'll help get things back to the way they were.
Sayori: I...
Sayori: I...see...
Sayori forces a smile through an incredibly pained expression.
Sayori: Ahaha...
Sayori: Is this what it feels like...to get stabbed in the chest?
Sayori: I should write a poem about this...
You: Sayori-
Sayori: It's okay.
Sayori: This is just my punishment...remember?
Sayori: For being so selfish...
Sayori: So please...
Sayori: Please don't worry about these stupid feelings.
Sayori: I know you're right.
Sayori: I knew this whole time that there's no happiness down that path.
Sayori: That's why I came here...
Sayori: Just so I could get the answer I needed to hear.
Sayori: And the other thing...
Sayori: You're also right that I just want it to go back to the way it was.
Sayori: I realize that now.
Sayori: You really do know me better than anyone.
Sayori: I'll trust you with anything...
Sayori: Anything at all...
Sayori: So...
Sayori: I'm sorry.
Sayori: Let's just be friends then...
Fumbling for something to say, I say the only thing that comes to mind.
You: Did you Monika get everything done you needed to?
It seems to work as Sayori becomes distracted.
Sayori: I haven't heard from her at all
Sayori: Which is weird, because she's typically good about responding back quickly.
You: Do you think everything is alright?
Sayori: I was actually thinking about going to check up on her.
Sayori: She doesn't live that far away from here.
Sayori: Would you want to come with me?
You: Um well...
You: Sure
Why do I suddenly feel nervous about visiting Monika?
Sayori starts to lead the way there.
You: Hey Sayori
Sayori: Yeah?
You: I really mean it.
You: I know things are bad right now.
You: But I'm going to be your friend through all of this.
You: I want to help you through this.
Sayori smiles at that.
The smile is genuine.
It's not too long until we arrive at Monika's house.
It's massive and seemingly empty.
There's not a light on in the place.
Sayori cautiously walks up and rings the doorbell.
There's no answer.
Sayori: Monika!
Sayori: Monika are you home?!
It takes a couple minutes but we hear movement from inside the house.
The lights turn on room by room.
Eventually we are greeted at the door by Monika.
She's still wearing her sleeping clothes and seems to not be ready at all for the day.
Her entire face goes red and then she slams the door closed immediately.
Monika: Uhh
Monika: Uhh
Monika: Give me five minutes.
A few minutes go by and Monika opens the door again.
She's clearly just rushed herself through getting dressed.
Even still, I can't believe how remarkable she looks in something besides her school uniform.
She welcomes us inside.
Monika: What brings you here?
Monika: I didn't mess something up again, did I?
Sayori: No, it's not anything like that.
Sayori: We were just worried is all.
Sayori: You weren't answering me back and...
You: We wanted to make sure you're okay?
Monika seems completely blown away by this.
Monika: Well this is a surprise.
Monika: I'm sorry for not answering you, Sayori.
Monika: I was really tired and spent most of the day in bed.
Sayori: Are you feeling alright?
Monika: I think so.
Monika: Just a lazy day I guess.
Sayori: Well now that we're here, shouldn't we work on the stuff for the festival?
Monika panics for a second.
Monika: Oh no!
Monika: I completely forgot.
Monika: I mean we never get to...
Monika: I'm so sorry Sayori.
Sayori: It's fine, I'm sure we can put something together.
Monika comes back a few minutes later with everything we need to make the posters and pamphlets.
Well, more or less.
We all spend the next few hours rushing through everything and trying to get it all done.
With three people working on it, the work gets done pretty fast.
The entire time, Monika seems slightly on edge though.
Before I know it, everything is all done and taken care of.
Monika: I'm still so sorry for dragging you two into this.
Monika: I really didn't mean to.
Monika: I guess I just haven't felt like doing anything recently.
Sayori: It's okay.
Sayori: We all have days like that.
Sayori: What's important is having friends around that can help you with that?
Sayori: Isn't that right?
Sayori looks directly at me.
You: Absolutely.
Monika apologizes again before we end up leaving.
All in all, it was actually really fun.
I don't know why I don't try to spend more time with her.
Sayori: You noticed it too right?
You: Noticed what?
Sayori: She must've spent all day in bed.
You: Hmm
You: Yeah I thought about that but I didn't want to say anything.
Sayori: I hope whatever is bringing her down isn't anything too bad.
You: What do you mean?
Sayori: Oh, so you didn't notice?
You: Notice what?
Sayori: Something is definitely up with her.
Sayori: I just hope it all ends up working out.
You: How do you even know something is up?
Sayori: Let's just call it a woman's intuition.
You: Sayori.
Sayori: Hmm?
You: I completely give up on ever understanding you.
Sayori giggles a little bit.
Sayori: That's fine.
Sayori: As long as we're friends.
Sayori: That's what matters.
As I lay in bed, I think back to what Yuri and Sayori mentioned.
Monika must be really great for all of her club members to worry about her so much.
Maybe I'll try to spend some time with her at the festival and make sure everything is okay.