"Your baby is measuring exactly where he should be at twenty-four weeks, Lorelai. And your blood pressure is good too. I'd like to see a little more weight on you, but other than that, things are right on track for you as you get closer to your third trimester," said Dr. Rosen as she looked over Lorelai's chart.
Lorelai sat up on her elbows. "More weight? Isn't it bad enough that at least three people have suggested that I should paint my stomach like a pumpkin for Halloween next week?"
Dr. Rosen chuckled. "You're no where near the size of a pumpkin. Besides, I've seen pictures of moms that do that and it's actually pretty cute."
"It is cute," mumbled Lorelai reluctantly. "How much time is left?"
Dr. Rosen checked her watch. "About five or six minutes. Where's Luke? He didn't feel like keeping you company today?"
"He wanted to come, but I told him it would be me drinking a disgustingly sweet drink and then waiting around for an hour before having my blood drawn. Mention the word blood to Luke and he turns green," said Lorelai with a chuckle. "He'll be here next time, so hopefully we get to see Eli on the big screen."
"Speaking of which, you need to come back for your twenty-eight week appointment and that falls on the week of Thanksgiving." Dr. Rosen turned to the computer to pull up her availabilities for November.
"Can we make it the week after? The week of Thanksgiving is always so hectic with the inn and the town and the four different dinners we have to attend." Lorelai rubbed her stomach gently as it growled at the mention of dinner. Because of her glucose screening test, she couldn't eat breakfast that morning.
"Four dinners? Well I won't have to worry about you not gaining enough weight after all," said Dr. Rosen jokingly. "Okay, let's make it for the week after that. Is November 30th good for you? It's on a Wednesday."
Lorelai thought for a second. "November 30th. November…30th. That date is so familiar, but I don't know why. I'll tell ya, pregnancy brain is the real deal." She shook her head slowly and shrugged. "Put us down for the 30th."
"Done. And time's up. Let's go get that blood drawn."
Ten minutes later Lorelai was climbing into her Audi when her cellphone started to ring. She quickly started her SUV to warm it up before answering. "Hello?"
"Lorelai, are you still in Hartford? I need you to come by to help me decide on something."
"I'm doing fine, Mom. Thanks for asking," Lorelai teased.
"No need to be sarcastic, Lorelai. I had every intention on asking how you were doing once you got here."
"Fine. E-Man is trying to kick his way out, so you better have something for me to eat when I get there."
Lorelai pulled up to her parents house a few minutes later. She pulled her pink coat around her tightly as best as she could and rang the doorbell. Emily whipped the door open and quickly ushered Lorelai inside.
"Come in, come in. It's been unseasonably cold lately. You really should wear more layers, Lorelai. And perhaps buy a coat that actually fits around you." Emily helped remove Lorelai's coat and handed it off to the maid.
Lorelai scoffed. "Excuse me, but my coat fits fine, Mother. And as much as I would love to stand here and listen to you criticize my wardrobe choices, I need to get back home. What did you need my help with?"
"I thought you were hungry, so I had Trinity make us some ham, brie, and apple tea sandwiches," said Emily as she led the way to the dining room.
"Fancy," said Lorelai with an appreciative nod. She sat at her usual spot at the table as Trinity placed a three-tier serving tray filled with sandwiches and scones in between her and her mother.
A minute later Trinity returned with a large tray that held a silver teapot, two teacups, and two smaller containers filled with milk and sugar. She placed the tray down next to Emily and scurried away to the kitchen.
Lorelai watched as her mother filled both teacups. Normally she would decline a cup of tea, but her mother seemed to be in a decent mood and Lorelai didn't want to ruin it. She reached for a sandwich a took a tentative bite. To her relief, the sandwich was actually quite good. "Great sandwiches, Mom. I'm not usually a meat with fruit kind of girl, but I could probably eat a dozen of these."
"I'm glad you like them." Emily smiled and handed Lorelai her cup of tea. "How was your appointment?"
Lorelai filled her mother in on the basics. Ever since Lorelai returned home from Maine over a month ago, Emily seemed to call and want visits more often than Lorelai was used to. Lorelai knew her mother would never admit it, but Emily hated not being able to be around more for this pregnancy. At first, Lorelai thought it was a control issue. Typical Emily not being able to call the shots or make Lorelai feel weakened by her condition. It wasn't long before Lorelai realized her mother was genuinely interested in what was going on and how she was feeling. It was new territory for the both of them, so of course Lorelai had to tread lightly. Still, it was a nice feeling.
Lorelai popped her last piece of scone into her mouth and eyed her mother suspiciously as she chewed. "Did you really need my help or did you just want me to come by? You don't have to make something up every time you want me to come over, Mom."
Emily shot her daughter a look that said "Yeah right" before polishing off the rest of her tea. "I wasn't lying, Lorelai." Trinity came to clear the table and Emily asked her to fetch Lorelai's coat when she was done.
Lorelai pulled on her coat and asked, "Where are we going?"
"Follow me." Emily led them through the side doors and onto the patio. They quickly walked through the gate that led to the pool house and stopped so Emily could unlock the door.
"Why are we going inside the pool house, Mom? Haven't you learned your lesson from the last time you went snooping around in there."
"Oh, please. I'm not snooping. This is the only place large enough to set all this up." Emily opened the French doors and stepped inside with Lorelai trailing behind her.
"Set all what up?" asked Lorelai before gasping at the sight in front of her. All of the furniture that had previously taken up space was removed and in its place were three cribs (in three different finishes) and every piece of matching accessory that could possibly go with it.
"Well what do you think?" asked Emily as she smiled brightly at her daughter.
"When did you get a Babys-R-Us?"
"Babys-R-Us? Do you honestly think I'd shop for my grandson at a retail chain like Babys-R-Us?" asked Emily with a look of disgust.
Lorelai rolled her eyes at her mother's snobbery. She crossed her arms over her chest. "Mom, what is all of this?"
"You won't let me throw you a baby shower, so I thought I would get you something that you need. All you have to do is pick what finish you like and they will deliver and set everything up for you. I like the white. It's so classic."
"Mom," said Lorelai slowly. "Luke made all of Eli's furniture. He worked really hard on it. I'm sorry, but I can't accept this." The look of disappointment on her mother's face absolutely crushed her. Before thinking, she quickly added, "How about we choose one for a nursery here?"
Emily immediately brightened up. "All right," she responded in an airy voice.
"How about we choose one for a nursery here? God, what was I thinking?" groaned Lorelai as she sat on the rocking chair in Eli's nursery later that night.
"You were thinking that you didn't want to hurt Grandma's feelings because you know deep down she meant well," said Rory as she sat on the floor folding some freshly-washed Yale baby gear she brought home from school.
"She's good, you know. Buttering me up with yummy tea sandwiches and scones. She knew what she was doing. She knew I'd be too tired to argue. And then she threw that whole 'I don't want a baby shower' argument in my face. Who does that? Also, why would Eli need a nursery there? Does she really think I would leave my newborn with her alone in the Winchester Mystery House?"
Rory sighed. She didn't want her mother getting all worked up, so she decided to change the subject. "What are our plans for Thanksgiving this year?"
"Nice segue. Oh! That reminds me. Is someone's birthday on November 30th? That's my next appointment. When Dr. Rosen said the date, it sounded so familiar. And…why are you looking at me like that?"
Rory gave her mom a confused look. "Mom, isn't that Luke's Dark Day?"
Lorelai quickly covered her mouth and whispered, "Oh, my God. How did I forget about that? He was so miserable last year."
"Yes, but a lot has happened since last year. You guys are married now and are having a baby. This year will be different. You'll see," said Rory reassuringly as she patted her mother's knee.
Lorelai forced a smile. "Yeah," she said softly. "We'll see."
"I have to say, I'm glad you decided against hanging those stupid caramel apples in the tree this year," said Luke. He and Lorelai watched from their porch as Babette and Morey performed their annual Halloween skit next door.
"Hey, it's not stupid. It's fun," objected Lorelai.
"It's unsanitary," grumbled Luke as he massaged Lorelai's calves.
"Did I tell you Dr. Rosen called and said everything came back fine? It should be smooth sailing from here on out." Lorelai rested her head on the back of the love seat as Luke's hands worked their magic.
"Good. When is your next appointment, so I can make sure I have coverage at the diner?"
Lorelai froze. She had been putting off telling Luke when her next appointment was out of fear of how he might react. Not that she thought he would be angry. It was the thought of him in pain that she couldn't handle especially when this time in their life should be full of joy. She had a vision of them years down the road and Eli asking her why his daddy was upset or worse, gone without saying a word. That thought left a huge knot in the pit of her stomach.
"It's, uh, the week after Thanksgiving," she answered quietly.
Luke chuckled. "Can you be more specific?"
Lorelai sat up straight and watched him carefully as she spoke. "November 30th."
There it was. If she didn't know him so well she would have missed it. The tiniest flicker of dread right there in his eyes. As quickly as she saw it, it was gone. He gave her a small smile although she could see that his jaw was clenched.
"I'll put it on the calendar at the diner." Luke cleared his throat. "We should probably head inside. It's getting cold. You want me to light a fire?" Luke stood and offered Lorelai his hands to help her slowly stand up.
"A fire would be great," she said softly.
Later that night Lorelai sat up in bed as she listened to Luke's soft snoring next to her. She couldn't get that look of dread in Luke's eyes out of her mind. They didn't speak about her appointment or November 30th for the rest of the evening and it didn't go unnoticed by Lorelai that Luke's mood became a lot more sullen. I wonder if getting him to talk about his grief would be helpful, she thought. She remembered their conversation last year and Luke telling her that he didn't like to talk about it, but maybe that's what he needed to do. Bottling up those emotions for over twenty years couldn't possibly be good for a person.
She grabbed her laptop and padded quietly down the hall to Eli's room. After taking a seat on the rocking chair she opened up her computer to do a little research on helping loved ones deal with grief. An hour later she was startled by a warm hand on her shoulder. She quickly closed her laptop as Luke kneeled down beside her.
"You scared me," said Lorelai quietly. She smiled at his appearance. Sleepy Luke was always one of her favorite Luke's.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know where you were. Is everything okay?" Luke tucked a stray hair behind Lorelai's ear.
"I couldn't sleep." She slowly stood and placed her laptop on top of Eli's dresser.
"Is it heartburn again because I bought you those chewy TUMS you like. It's more like candy if you ask me—"
"Luke, we need to talk about—Quick! Come here." She pulled up her soft, tunic exposing her belly.
Luke scrambled to his feet and stood in front of her. She reached for his hand and placed it on the left side of her belly. A second later, Luke felt the undeniable jab from his little boy. Their eyes met as they shared this beautiful moment for the first time together and Lorelai didn't have the heart to ruin it with talk of Luke's Dark Day. Instead she pulled him in for a deep, slow kiss. After a moment she pressed her forehead to his and whispered, "Take me to bed."
The conversation needed to be had, but it would have to wait for now. The look of hopefulness in Luke's eyes undid something inside of her and she wanted to hold onto that moment as long as she could. Once she brought up Luke and his grief, she wasn't sure when she would get that moment back.
Two weeks later Lorelai was leaving the post office when she was nearly toppled over by an overzealous Liz.
"It's so good to see you! You look great! Can I?" asked Liz gesturing to Lorelai's now basketball-sized belly.
"Yeah. Of course. He's awake now, so you should be able to feel him kick." Lorelai smiled at her sister-in-law as she felt Eli kick from inside.
"Wow. I still can't believe Luke is gonna be a daddy. How is my big brother?"
"He's good. He's been butting heads with Sookie over the menu for Thanksgiving next week. We're doing a late lunch at the inn if you and T.J. want to join us. We'll have plenty of food."
"I may take you up on that. My cooking skills aren't exactly up to my brother's level. I guess it serves me right for never staying home when we were kids. I could have learned a thing or two."
Lorelai hesitated before asking, "Liz, can I ask you something?"
"Anything."
Lorelai quickly checked their surroundings before leading Liz across the street and into the gazebo so that they could sit. "When your dad died, how did Luke take it?"
Liz stared off into space for a moment as if she were reliving it. She took a deep breath and turned her attention back to Lorelai. "I was in New York when he called to tell me about Daddy. He had been sick for a while, so we knew it was coming. Luke made all the arrangements, making sure everything was done exactly as Daddy would have wanted it. I was a mess. I hadn't been home in over a year and Jess barely even knew his grandpa. But Luke was Luke. Strong and put together. He made sure Jess and I had what we needed. It became too much for me. Luke had this strong need to take care of everyone all the time and I think it was because he didn't want to deal with his own feelings. I don't think I ever even saw him cry. Oh, damn. And now I'm making you cry."
Lorelai sniffled. "It's okay. It's just that Luke never talks about his dad and I can tell he carries that pain around with him all the time. Especially this time of year." She reached into her purse and pulled out a tissue to wipe her eyes.
"Liz, what did I tell you about making my wife cry?"
Both of their heads whipped around to see Luke standing at the bottom of the gazebo's steps holding two to-go cups from the diner. Lorelai was unsure of how long he had been standing there. He didn't look upset as he climbed the steps and handed each of them a cup.
"It's hot chocolate. I saw you two from the diner and figured if you were going to be out here chatting that you would need something to keep you warm." He leaned against one of the columns and crossed his arms over his chest. "Care to share?"
Shit. He knows, thought Lorelai as she looked nervously at Liz. "She didn't mean to make me cry, Luke. It's one of those days. We were talking about our Thanksgiving plans and then we got to talking about—"
"Me," said Luke knowingly.
Lorelai sighed. "Yes, but only because I was worried about you. You won't talk to me about your dad."
"I told you before that I don't like to talk about it, Lorelai." His voice was calm, but there was a slight edge to it.
"Don't you think you need to? It's been over twenty years, Luke," said Liz, finally speaking up.
Luke's eyes narrowed. "I know how long it's been. What is this? An intervention?" He pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep, cleansing breath. "Liz, I need to talk to Lorelai alone."
Liz looked at Lorelai to make sure she was okay before standing up. She stopped in front of Luke and placed a gentle hand on his tense forearm. "She only asked because she loves you, big brother."
Luke waited for Liz to exit the gazebo before joining Lorelai on the bench. He turned sideways to face her, resting his arm across the back. "When my dad first got sick, I lost it. Our mom died when Liz and I were just kids and my dad was all I had. I cried for days until he finally told me to man up and that real men don't show weakness, they have to be strong for the people around them. I never forgot that. And that's why, after he died, I went into autopilot. I did what needed to be done and when it was all over, the funeral and the selling of our house, I felt that weakness starting to creep back in. That's why I opened the diner. I was scared that if I stopped pushing forward I would get swallowed up by grief and sadness and that somehow my dad would know and then he would be disappointed in me."
Lorelai reached for his hand and was relieved when he intertwined their fingers. "You honored your dad, Luke, by being strong and taking care of everyone around you. There's no way he would be disappointed in you. He was wrong about one thing. Showing emotion doesn't make you weak or less of a man. It makes you human. And we don't always have to talk about the sad stuff. I'd love to hear happy stories about the person who shaped my husband into the incredible man that he is today. I think it would help."
Luke looked up into her bright, blue eyes and was overcome suddenly with a wave of emotion. A huge weight had been lifted off of his shoulders and his heart as well. Seeing his wife look at him adoringly and not with pity, made him feel so relieved. He reached out and caressed her jaw before leaning in for a soft, lingering kiss. He pulled back and said, "I want to show you something, but if you're too cold it can wait."
Lorelai smiled. "I'm fine. Show me."
Luke stood and helped Lorelai down the steps of the gazebo. Hand-in-hand they walked across the opposite side of the square, behind Miss Patty's, and then down a dirt path that came to a clearing. The cemetery. The last time Lorelai had been here was after Fran had died two years before. Luke led them to a shaded spot under a large oak tree where two headstones covered in flowers faced towards them. Lorelai read the first headstone. MARY ELIZABETH DANES. She smiled as she realized that Liz was named after their mother. And then she turned her attention to the second headstone. WILLIAM ELIOTT DANES.
"Oh, Luke," said Lorelai softly. "You got Eli from Eliott. Why didn't you tell me?"
Luke shrugged before squatting down to brush some fallen leaves off the top of his parents headstones. "You were excited about the whole rhyming thing and I figured eventually we would come here and you would figure it out for yourself."
"So in your own non-communicative way, you were telling me about your dad. I just didn't know it."
Luke stood and walked over to stand next to Lorelai. "Something like that. We should get back. It's too cold for you to be out here."
"Okay, but I want you tell me a story. A happy one. And speak up so Eli can hear you too." They turned and made their way back towards the footpath that lead back to town. Lorelai listened as Luke told her about his and Liz's first Christmas after their mom had died. His Uncle Louie and his dad had tried to make dinner but burned it instead, so they had to call Luke's grandmother to come and help out.
"She's the one who taught me how to cook. After that, every holiday she and I would plan out a menu and spend the day cooking. I loved it and it was one less thing my dad had to worry about." Luke walked Lorelai up to their porch and then gestured behind him with his thumb. "I have to get back. I'll be home in a few hours. You need anything?"
Lorelai smiled and leaned in for a quick kiss. "No. I'm good. I'll see you later." She turned to open the door but then stopped suddenly. "Oh! I may have invited your sister and T.J. for Thanksgiving," she said quickly with a grimace before turning and running inside as best as she could.