Apologies for the slight delay - I've not been well.
Chapter Ten
"Remorse"
An incessant tone disturbed me from my peaceful slumber. I stretched lazily and then opened my eyes, only to be met with complete darkness. I frowned in confusion. Was it still night time? I felt like I had been asleep for hours, but it was still pitch dark, and yet there was something not right with this room. Where was the glow from the green lava lamp? Where was the faint illumination from the street lights? Strange, I thought to myself and then sighed in relief as that damn tone stopped from wherever it had come from.
A grin widened on my face as the dream from last night came back to me. A delicious dream I knew I shouldn't be having, but what the hell - I could indulge in my dreams at least. Henry and I together, making love all night long - more real than any of my dreams had been for months - perhaps inspired by seeing him and being around him again I surmised. And then I rolled over and my leg kicked something solid. I screamed into the darkness and cautiously reached out with my hands, meeting soft silk sheets, plump luxurious pillows and finally a head of soft curls. My eyes widened upon the realisation that someone was in bed with me. How the hell had that happened? And just when had Coreen changed her bedding for silk?
As my hands explored further…I suddenly sat up in the bed and reached over to snap the bedside lamp on. I screwed my eyes shut against the sudden harsh lighting, before squinting slightly in the direction of the body beside me and my worst fears were revealed…I was still in Henry's condo, in his bedroom and in his bed…quite naked I realised. And then it all came rushing back to me with a blush - no wonder last nights dream had felt so real…it hadn't been a dream at all - I had slept with Henry last night.
"Oh crap," I groaned at myself and couldn't bring myself to glance Henry's way. What the hell had I done?
That same tone started again then, and I realised it was my cell phone in my bag. I jumped out of bed, completely forgetting about the broken glass until my feet reached the floor - but it was clear. I realised Henry must have cleaned it up before he slept. Locating my bag on the Victorian sofa in his bedroom, I snatched my phone from it and answered it quickly.
"Yes?" I snapped.
"Cat! Where the hell are you?" demanded Vicki's anxious voice.
"I erm…I…" Oh God, what to tell her?
"Have you just woken up?" she realised.
"Uh huh," I mumbled.
"Oh…guess that's why you weren't answering your cell or the phone at Coreen's."
"Mmm, yeah," I agreed.
"So, last night….you left in a huff and just went straight to bed and slept until now?"
"I was tired," I protested, relieved she assumed I had just been asleep at Coreen's place until now.
"Are you feeling alright?" she wondered.
"Erm…actually, my ears hurt," I mentioned, realising at that moment that they did. "Might head off to the doctors soon, just to be safe," I added, it dawning on me that perhaps that was why I had fainted on Henry in the park the night before - I was coming down with another infection. I felt my own forehead, it was rather hot and I felt a little dizzy.
"Do you want me to send Coreen to pick you up?"
"No!" I snapped. "No…it's fine. I can get a cab. I guess you're still busy."
"Yeah, we've both been here all night," she revealed.
"Oh good…erm…I mean, Oh god…you must be exhausted."
"Nothing I'm not used to. Anyway, you get yourself to the doctor if you're not feeling well…and let me know how you are, okay? If you're up to it, come by the office," she instructed.
"Will do. See you later Vicki."
"Bye." She hung up as I snapped my cell phone shut, tossing it down on the sofa.
I turned then and inadvertently caught sigh of Henry laying in the bed - the bottom half of him draped simply with a red silk sheet. And I gasped audibly - he truly was a work of art!
I stood silently, regarding him carefully and contemplating just how awkward I had made things now. I knew he would be under some pretence that we were back on, that we were lovers again. He might be a vampire, but he was also still just a typical male and they all thought sex solved everything. It didn't, I realised with a disheartened sigh - it just caused more problems. Still he looked so beautiful in his sleep - the brown tousled curls of hair scattered upon the pillow. The light of the lamp shimmering off his glorious bare chest on display. The muscles in his arms so strong and tempting. The hallow of his throat and the pout of his luscious lips almost summoning me back to him - back to his bed, to forget all my logic and all my defences and simply give in, to take what I wanted with total abandon.
A sudden high pitched bleep startled me from my whimsy reverie as I literally jumped and my arms flailed at my side. It took me a moment to realise what it was before I grabbed my phone from the couch again to discover a text message from Coreen. I read the message vaguely - something about checking if Lestat and Louis - her pet gerbils needed feeding before I left her place. What had more impact on me was the realisation of the time which I noted on the phone - it was already almost one in the afternoon and I had slept for hours.
I groaned inwardly, realising that I would have to get back to Coreen's place first to change and check on her pets before I could go to the hospital to see the doctor about my latest infection and that very likely I would be there for hours. What a futile waste of a day - especially when you consider it was very possible there might not be too many more for me to benefit from.
Pulling myself together I began to gather my clothes from around his room where they had been carelessly strewn the night before. And when I couldn't find my panties, I found myself rummaging under the sheets at the bottom of the bed with my eyes closed in fear I would see something that I really should not enjoy or take advantage of in his comatose vampire sleep. I knew that admiring his naked form would be my complete undoing.
Finally, with an armful of clothes I headed for the bathroom and took a much needed hot shower to clear my head and mull over what on earth I was to do now. How was I to handle the situation? The only conclusion I came up with was that it was not going to be at all easy - I was about to have a very pissed, very confused and very slightly hurt (though he would never admit it) vampire on my hands. And I felt like a complete bitch about it all.
Sometime later, upon exiting the bathroom and buttoning my blouse en route, I glanced up and was stopped in my tracks by the sight facing me. Somehow, in my hunt for my panties I must have caused the sheets on the bed to slip, so as they now hung very low on his hips - revealing the treasure trove of hair that barely concealed his dignity. Did I really have the will power to walk away from this Adonis replica? From this beautiful specimen of a man? From my one and only true love? With anguish I realised that I would have to force myself, no matter how much it would kill me to do so. Because if I truly still loved him, if I ever cared for him and if he still meant to me what I claimed, then I had to do this. I would not become a burden to him for all eternity, long after I escaped in death.
Taking a step towards his bed, I grasped the sheet and pulled it further over his body for his benefit as much as mine. As I did, my fingers brushed lightly against the smooth cool skin of his belly and I flinched away from him as if he'd burnt me - using every last ounce of my resolve.
"I'm so sorry Henry," I whispered, glancing at his handsome face relaxed in his deep sleep. "Last night was…beautiful. You're still amazing," I grinned to myself. "And perhaps you needed it as much as I needed you. But it was wrong of me to give in to the lust so easily. I should have more control - not that I ever really did when it came to you," I chuckled to myself. "But, I'm sorry, it shouldn't have happened. Maybe it was simply an itch we both had to scratch, something we needed to get out of our systems in order for us to move on - or I can fool myself into thinking that anyway. After all, I do have the art of delusion down pretty well. But," I sighed before continuing with my hushed monologue, "it doesn't really change things Henry. We can't be together for all the reasons you told me months ago and then, more than that…and yet I can't tell you. I want to, so badly…but I love you too much to do that to you."
"I know you think I hate you and that I'm still angry with you for everything, and you'll think that even more now. But Henry…the truth is I still love you, I never stopped. I love you so very much," I lightly brushed a single curl from his forehead and ran my finger tenderly down his nose, over his full pink lips and to the cleft in his chin. "And I'm going to be in love with every day for the rest of my life…and very probably whatever comes after that," I added quietly, choking on a sob as I gazed at his perfect statuesque form. "I'm just so sorry Henry, for everything, for hurting you. I hope one day you can forgive me for all of this," a lone tear escaped the corner of my eye as I bent to press my lips against his. "Goodbye Henry."
And with that I collected my bag and jacket from the couch and quickly left his apartment with silent tears streaming down my face.
******
It was almost four hours later before I was diagnosed at the hospital - as I'd suspected I had a middle ear infection and right now, after all the doctors poking and prodding in my ear - it was killing me. I lay on the hospital bed in the lonely, far too quiet nondescript little room, gazing at the clock the other side of the wall. I watched every tick of the clock hands, knowing that every second was a moment closer to twilight and a feared moment closer to facing the wrath of Henry and having to let him know that last night changed nothing. That it had been nothing more than sex - and I was dreading it!
But before that I had to face a series of tests my doctor had prescribed upon the discovery through my medical records he'd obviously tracked down from England, that this was my 12th infection I had suffered in the last few months. He suspected something more serious at fault here and since I could barely tell him the truth - that it was caused by an evil curse cast by a psychotic dark witch, I would have to endure further needles and examinations and various procedures once more.
"And I see you you've brought in the troops," I commented as the rather cute doctor from my last visit to hospital returned to my room with a nurse in tow, complete with her tray of torture devices.
He smiled in response to my attempt at humour. "We're going to have to take more blood." He almost sounded apologetic.
"Hmm…you too huh? Seems that everyone wants my blood…" I muttered under my breath.
"Excuse me?" he frowned.
"Oh, erm…just every doctor I see, they all want blood samples," I explained flippantly and shrugged my shoulders, knowing I was really talking about the vampire I'd had feeding from me the night before. I winced then as the nurse jabbed me with the needle in the crook of my elbow. Sure, a vampire biting me with sharp fangs to feed upon my blood and I didn't bat an eyelid, a needle inserted into my skin and taking my blood and I cringed like a wuss. But then, Henry always had me rather…distracted when he did it I thought wryly.
Vampire feeding from me…hang on, just how much blood did I have left anyway? I mean…there was my injured foot which bled rather extensively and then he'd healed the cut - tasting my blood in the process and then he fed from me too. How would I explain a really low blood count or something? Though, that could explain why I had slept so soundly and so long.
"Well, I promise we won't take too much," Dr McDonnell smiled whilst checking something on my chart.
I looked down as the third tube was slowly filling with my swirling blood and wondered how much exactly was not too much to him.
"I think it would be wise to wait for all the blood results to come back before we investigate further. No reason subjecting you to tests we don't need," the doctor added.
"So, I'm free to go?" I asked as the nurse filled her final tube and began to withdraw the needle. Yep, I decided, a vampire bite was definitely less painful - at least the way Henry did it to me was.
"Almost," he looked up from my chart. "Just have a few more questions. We have your number if we find anything, right?"
"Erm…do you have my cell number on there as well?" I wondered as the nurse routinely slapped a band aid on my arm before picking up her tray containing five tubes of my blood and hurried out of my room with them.
"No, but that could be handy to have," he grinned, his demeanour totally changing now the nurse had left. He handed me the chart then and plopped himself down on the bed as I quickly moved my legs. "Care to fill it in for me?" he smirked. I scribbled the number down before handing my chart back to him and he tossed it onto the small sterile bedside table. "You're not local are you?" He surprised me with his next question.
I rolled my eyes after the initial shock of his unexpected question. Hardly detective work doc - my accent and medical records would have given that away. "No, I'm from England," I answered his question - were we done yet? I wanted to go.
"So, are you just visiting or perhaps you're relocating?" he wondered.
I smiled politely through my frustration at wanting to leave, wondering what point these questions had and where this was leading to - though I had a fair idea. "I'm visiting my cousin for awhile, she lives in the city."
"Oh, I see," he grinned at me again and I gave an involuntary shudder. For all his good looks there was something…creepy about him when he smiled - almost an evil leer rather than the infectious grin of Henry Fitzroy - damnit - get out of my head vampire!
"You know," he continued as I tried to mentally eradicate thoughts of the vampire from my head. " I get every Sunday off. I could give you a tour of the city if you're interested? There's so much to see and I know plenty of places barely seen by the usual tourists." He tried to make his proposal sound even more appealing. "Don't want you missing any of it," he made a move to take hold of my hand just as I developed an itch on my shoulder to scratch, causing me to flinch my hand away at the right moment.
"Well, thanks for the offer," I replied kindly and took a surreptitious glance at the clock, "but I spent a few months here last year. So I'm already pretty familiar with the city."
"Right, not your first visit then?" He wasn't easily swayed
"No."
"You said you spent a few months here. Were you visiting your cousin then as well?" He wondered.
I frowned, wondering what business it was of his, but I figured answering him might get me out of here quicker than trying to distract him. "Initially I was. But…then I met someone, hence me staying longer than I planned," I admitted as that vampire once again crept into my thoughts whilst gazing at the tiny pin prick of blood that had soaked through the plaster on my arm.
"And is this someone the reason you're back? Are you still seeing them?"
"Erm…I…we, well…it's complicated," I sighed, feeling progressively uncomfortable with his line of questioning and wondering why on earth I was answering him truthfully - why did I not just lie and tell him that yes I was still seeing someone, that we were serious and get him off my case. Too late now!
"I'm sorry," he touched my shoulder as I glanced down at his hand, "I must seem awfully rude and very unprofessional. But…I do think you're a lovely lady and I would like to spend some time getting to know you. Perhaps we could go for a drink or something sometime?" He asked hopefully.
"Erm…" I shifted on the bed causing his hand to slip from my shoulder. "Isn't there…some rule about doctors dating patients?" I still wasn't sure what to make of him and especially not now with his unwanted advances. Along with his creepy smile there was just something about him that bothered me and I wasn't at all interested.
"Yes, there is. But once I discharge you with your prescription today I'm not your doctor anymore, so it's hardly inappropriate. Besides, I'm not your registered doctor or anything like that, I'm just a medical consultant you saw in the ER in a foreign country. It's all perfectly above board, I promise."
"Oh, well…" I didn't know what to say. I wasn't interested, he made me feel uncomfortable and yet I didn't want to be rude. Admittedly he was good looking, but I guess a little too smarmy with it and I felt a little cornered and pressured here.
"I have Miss Ellis' shot and prescription." The nurse returned at that moment and I had never been so grateful to see another needle.
The doctor leapt from my bed the second she opened the curtain and made out he had been examining me before he stepped back. She gave me the antibiotic shot and told me I should take pain killers if I needed them as he hung around.
"Dr McDonnell, you're needed in resus two!" someone called anxiously, sticking their head around the curtain before rushing off.
"I'd better go," he hesitated. "We'll erm, be in touch…with your blood results," he muttered whilst scribbling something down on a piece of paper. "Here's my out of hours number, if you have any concerns of erm…anything you want to discuss," he added, winking behind the nurses back so as I got his double meaning.
"Doctor McDonnell!" Someone else called him more frantically.
He sighed then, gave me one last fleeting look and left my room swiftly as I wished I hadn't added my cell phone number to the chart.
"There we go, all done." The nurse put the needle back on the tray. "Here's your prescription," she handed me a print out sheet. "You can get it filled out at any pharmacy and you'll need to take one four times a day for a week. You should feel better really soon," she smiled encouragingly. "And like Doctor McDonnell said, we'll be in touch with your results and if we need any further tests."
"I can go?" I asked, shoving the prescription into my bag.
"You can," she smiled, clearing up the bedside table.
I jumped down from the bed and wobbled slightly as my head spun and spots danced in front of my eyes. Must be from all the blood loss and laying there for the past few hours, I surmised to myself. The nurse caught me and helped steady me.
"Are you alright?" She looked concerned.
"I'm fine. Just got up too quick." I assured her with a smile before slowly making me way out of the hospital. I would rather struggle with dizziness than sit around for a repeat performance of the Doctor Mcflirty experience!