K – Kismet

Have you ever felt that something was absolutely kismet?

Kismet, if you don't know, is like 'fated' or 'destined'. So, knowing that, have you ever felt that way about something?

I have.

Only it took me a while to realize it.

At first, I thought that slightly weighted feeling on my heart was dread. I thought it was fear of rejection, not the foreboding sense of 'what is meant to be'. After my first kiss, however, I knew it was something else. Whatever fears I had, whatever rejection I was dreading, vanished. After that kiss, there was no going back. There was no possibility of rejection, either. And that's when I began to understand that maybe, just maybe, this was meant to be. That I was fated to be with this person, destined to love him forever.

It's a bit ironic, because I would have never predicted this to happen. Years ago, when I was practically still a child, I had not an inkling about love or kismet. I thought the blonde boy with blue eyes was nothing but an obstacle, one that I had to fight and rid myself of. It was a nuisance, but after a good knocking to my skull, he seemed less like one.

He and I have a mutual understand of one another due to our similar circumstances. Both our mothers are gone, and our fathers weren't there for us (his being deceased, and mine out to kill me). We were shunned from the people of our village. The only differences are this: I knew why they hated me and he didn't, and he was able to make friends while I couldn't. He also doesn't have siblings like I do, but it hardly matters. The point is, our demons shorted our opportunities in life, and we could see the pain in each other's eyes.

It was kismet that we met and fought, and that he changed me. It was kismet that he was the one to come after me when the Akatsuki kidnapped me, and kismet that it was his chakra that helped to ring me back to life.

It was also fated destiny that one week, I stopped in Konohagakure for an important meeting with the Hokage. But when I went to the gates, expecting to find Tsunade-san standing there, it was Naruto in the traditional robes, only modified to fit his personality. Flames were stitched onto the bottom in the same red as the undershirt, and the sleeves had been butchered to reveal the bulging muscles of his biceps. Admittedly, I had stopped short for a minute and gaped at him.

"Look, Gaara!" he had said in an overly animated tone, his arms opening wide to gesture at himself. "I'm Hokage now!"

At the time, I had managed a small smile. "I'm happy for you, Naruto."

He chuckled. "Me too. I finally got my dream accomplished, 'ttebayo. Took long enough."

"You're only nineteen, Naruto. Becoming Hokage at nineteen is very impressive," I said as we walked down Konoha's main street toward the Hokage mansion.

He sniffed. "Yeah, but not as impressive as becoming Kazekage at… what? Fourteen, fifteen?"

I waved that aside. "Our village is different."

"No, you're just different."

I wasn't sure how to take that, but the way he smiled warmly with his eyes twinkling at me, I took it as a compliment. Embarrassed, I glanced away. "Thank you."

"No need to thank me… all I did was say what I've always thought of you," he said, although I caught a hint of shyness in his tone.

I looked at him quizzically "You're always thought that I was different?"

He nodded as he walked alongside me. "Yup. At first, I have to say, it wasn't in the good way. But over time, I found that I meant it in the good way. You're special, Gaara. To me, and as a person."

I knew I was special to him, but it was odd to finally hear it aloud. I wanted to ask why he thought I was a special person – I had hoped he would mention how much I've changed, because even I'm proud of myself for that – but instead I kept my lips sealed.

It wasn't until after the meetings and formal dinner that Naruto and I were left alone. He said that he wanted to talk to me, so I permitted him to take me out for a stroll around the shore of Konoha's lake.

He walked like he always had, with his hands carelessly latched behind his head. He was done growing by then, but he stood a good three inches taller than me. I don't know when we went form the same height to three inches apart, but I didn't mind it very much.

"So…" he began slowly. The night air was fresh and cool on our backs, and it relaxed me. "How long has it been since we've last seen each other? I've kinda missed you."

"It's been a good year and a half, I think," I said. In reality, I knew exactly how long it had been: one year, seven months, two weeks, and three days. I had been counting, because I knew when the one-year mark since I'd last seen him, and from there I simply counted the days until I was going to make this visit.

In retrospect, Naruto's casualness had been forced. He was emitting a slight anxiousness, as if he had something to do or say that he couldn't bring himself to for whatever reason. I later found out what. But not before we had a short conversation.

"That long, really? No wonder I missed you!" he said with a tiny laugh. Then, a bit more seriously, he asked: "You, uh, didn't happen to miss me too, did ya?"

I bit my lip from the inside. "A little," I lied. Truthfully, I had missed him more than I could bear to say. I felt idiotic the entire time that we were apart, because I knew that it was girlish of me to ache for someone the way that I had. I had recently admitted to myself that I could be feeling something akin to love, and after speaking to Temari about it (I knew better than to ask my brother, Kankurou; he would most likely give me the sex talk instead), I realized that I had been correct. I somehow fell in love with Uzumaki Naruto, and there was nothing I could do about it.

"You did?" he asked hopefully. His arms fell from his head as he looked at me. I nodded, and he smiled. His gaze returned to the path ahead of us. "What have you been doing this past year?"

I shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't remember. The days blur together." Paperwork, training to regain some of my jutsu talents back after losing Shukaku's chakra and power, more paperwork, conferences, a couple travels to other villages, and book reading. There's not much I do, but when you add it all together over the course of months, it sums up to a relatively busy schedule.

He nodded sympathetically. "Mine, too. Although a lot has changed around here… Sakura and Lee got together, and after a little mishap with me and Hinata, Kiba stepped in and now they're together, too. I heard that even your sister and Shikamaru are trying to plan a wedding or something. And Sasuke is back, although he's being kept under the watchful eye of our ANBU. It was rough, trying to get him back. But he finally broke, you know? And now things are on their way to going back to normal with him. At least I think they are."

"And you became Hokage," I added.

"Oh, right! That too," he said with a forgetful laugh, as if something so big was actually so small. I guess he didn't want to brag. That in itself told me how much he had also changed.

"You seem to handle the position well," I remarked softly. Then, I inquired: "How long ago was it that the ceremony was held? And how long have you known that you would get the title before you accepted it?"

Naruto snorted. "Tsunade-baachan was tricky. She didn't tell me a thing until she held this huge gathering in the main square, saying with a smirk that she was retiring, and was about to announce the new Hokage. When she said my name, I was honestly shocked. I thought I had failed, that I didn't deserve it, because of what happened with Kyuubi and the Akatsuki and whatnot and since Sasuke wasn't back yet. See, we got Sasuke back about five months ago, and she made me Hokage seven months ago. It was actually the act me becoming Hokage that allowed me to do what I thought necessary in order to bring the bastard home."

"I see," I muttered with interest. It fascinated me to hear about his life. His life always seemed much more eventful than my own, and I enjoyed hearing about it. If not for him, I might not care to hear such things. In fact, I wouldn't care about anyone or anything.

He looked at me then with an expression that I believe was seeking either approval or more feedback. Suddenly, however, he let it drop and he replaced it with another grin, only this one looked nervous. I could clearly hear the uncertainty in his voice then he told me next, "You know, I didn't come out here to make small talk. There's something I've been meaning to tell you for a while now. I could've sent you a letter about it, but I wanted to tell you in person."

"And what is that?" I asked, my throat growing dryer with each word. I sensed something approaching; like a storm, only it held a peculiarly amiable aura.

He slowed his pace and fidgeted. "Um, I have a question to ask first."

"You can ask me anything, Naruto. You know that," I assured him. He looked like he needed encouragement.

He took a deep breath. "Okay." He paused. "So, I was wondering… what do you think of me? Now, be honest. I want to know exactly how you feel, and don't hold back. Alright?"

It was my turn to fidget. Tell him exactly how I feel with all honesty? I can't do it, I thought. I can't flat out tell him my thoughts of him!

"I'm not so sure that you want to know, Naruto…" I said to prolong being forced to confess my feelings.

But he was having none of that. "No, I really want to know," he said sternly. He stopped walking altogether as he faced me, his hand coming up to point directly at my nose. "And you're going to tell me, because depending on what you say, I can tell you freely what's been bugging me for months now."

He as trying to make me curious. And, I am ashamed to say, it worked. I fell for it, and gave in. "Fine," I stated as I bat his hands away. "But you're not going to like it." At least I thought he wouldn't. By the slowly forming expression of doubt on his face, I thought that I was correct.

He swallowed. "Why not?"

I didn't answer. Instead, I told him everything. I turned away from him, my fists clenched, as I spilled everything I thought and felt; everything I still think and feel, even to this day. I doubt he was prepared for it, even though he told me later on that he had initially expected the worst and had been pleasantly surprised when the worst did not occur.

This is what I had said, as uncharacteristically blunt of me as it was:

"Naruto, even when I disliked you before we became friends, I admired your ability to get along well with others. Later, after we had become friends, I felt compelled to repay you for what you did for me, as unethical of a method you had used. I wanted to prove to you that I got your message and understood that there was more to life than I had been led to believe, so I aimed to become Kazekage, as you had to become Hokage. When I accomplished this, I hoped that you would hear about it when you returned from your travels with the legendary Sannin, and hoped you would be proud of me, and think that I became a great shinobi. I've always sought your approval, it seems, and when I got it I somehow felt happier than I ever before.

"It was strange, because I started having dreams and thoughts of you following our parting after you saved me from death. The dreams and thoughts were highly inappropriate, at least by my standards. I couldn't stop thinking about your kindness and smiling face the way I saw it when I awoke from death, the hues of sunny yellow and intense blue swirling in my mind. I started wishing for uncanny things, like feeling your hand in mine again, or along my back once more. It got worse as I began to wonder what it would be like to kiss you as I've seen other people do. When I asked my sister why it was I have these feelings of longing and warmth, she merely smiled and told me that I was in love.

"So you wanted to know what I think of you? Or of what I feel towards you?

"Well, Naruto, I think you're a wonderful person who conquered more than your share of violent trials, and like every human being, suffered and failed but tired again anyway until you succeeded. I think you're strong and determined and caring, even about fickle people like me.

"And I feel that I don't want to be your friend any longer, because it torments me. I want to be more than your friend; if you would allow it, I'd like to be your lover, and if I can't, then I'd like for us not to see one another again or else I might lose my mind knowing that all I'll ever get from you are smiles and gestures that a friend receives."

Finally finished, I exhaled sharply. I was tempted not to wait for his reaction; my stomach was churning so violently, I was beginning to feel nauseous.

But then, out of the blue, I heard hysteric, relieved laughter. I whirled around with a puzzled expression. "What?" I demanded. I was shaking all over with nerves and despite the context of it, I disliked being laughed at.

He grinned broadly at me, all the tension around him gone. "You have no idea how glad I am to hear that."

I blinked. My mouth opened and closed a few times as I struggled to reply. He was… glad to hear that I loved him? He wasn't disgusted or shocked or ready to break to me that he doesn't return my feelings?

As I continued to stare, he shook his head and calmed his weak laughter. "Wow. I never thought we were on the same level about this, too…"

"On the same level?" I parroted. He's not say what I think he's saying, is he? I thought. Because if he is…

"Yeah," he told me, "Because there's a lot we have in common, but I didn't think shared sentiments was one of them. I was worried that if I confessed first, you'd brush me off and think that I was kidding."

"So… that means…" I said slowly, my heart and mind still trying to wrap around the concept of what was happening. It was like some of my crazier dreams were coming to life. It felt impossible, and yet elevating. Kismet came into play once again, only it changed my life in a fresh manner.

"It means," Naruto said confidently, "That I can do this without consequence."

"Do wh–" But before I was able to ask, he closed the space between us in three milliseconds flat.

That was the first time I ever felt someone's lips on my own.

And, like originally I said, it was then that I knew what truly defined 'fate', 'destiny', and better yet, 'kismet'.

I know it's all these things simply because Naruto has not let go of me yet, and I doubt he ever will. We are bound together in way no other human could understand unless they, too, contained demons and together go through what Naruto and I have. Only then would they be able to understand the link fate has woven for us.

A/N: While searching for unique K-words (I originally put 'know', but that seemed too lame), I came across more than just 'kismet'... I found probably the most perverted and amazing K-word in the history of K-words: "karezza". It means: "prolonged sex avoiding orgasm". AWESOME, RIGHT? If you're a pervert like me, that is. And if you've read a lot of NaruGaa lemons like I have.