Sorry that I haven't updated in a couple days. I've been working on another story "Everything Has Changed". It is also Camaya and you should all check it out because you are amazing and you just should. Thanks for the reviews on last chapter. I love you guys. Remember that I update faster if motivated by reviews... Motivate me!
Disclaimer: I don't own degrassi
"Cam! Wake up!" My sister calls jumping on the foot of my bed with her knees excitedly. I sit up and groggily wipe my eyes before looking at the alarm clock… 8 am. "What?" I ask my sister with a scraggly voice.
"You and Maya are dating! What the heck dude! You're supposed to tell me stuff like that before Katie calls me to tell me!" she shouts excitedly at me with a smile on her face.
"Sorry… it just happened last night and you weren't home yet when I went to bed. How does Katie know?"I ask my sister curiously after coughing a few times to get the sleepiness out of my voice.
"Maya told her! What do you think?" she asks me as if it should be obvious. "Well?" she asks.
"Well what?" I continue not knowing what she wants from me.
"What happened?" she asks curiously and loudly grinning at me as Brady begins to stir in his sleep.
I think about everything that happened yesterday, and smile at the fact that I have reached the goal I was looking toward for so long. I feel like it's a Mario game, and I just beat the last Boss level. Now all that's left is me and my princess…
"Cam!" she says hitting my arm and pulliIng me out of my head. "Sorry…"
"Um… I told her how I feel about her, and she told me that she liked me, but she was worried about dating in case we were to break up because we're neighbors and it would be hard. Then I kissed her and she changed her mind." I tell her smiling and she holds her hand over her heart.
"Awe! My little brother and my adoptive little sister make a cute couple!" she coos on the edge of my bed.
"Can you not put it that way? You make it sound like incest!" I tell her standing up now fully awake.
"Sorry! It's just too cute… Are you going on your first date today?" she asks me inquisitively.
"Well, we're going to that Bonfire tonight. I guess it could be kind of like a date." I tell my sister as I walk across my bedroom to the door with her following behind.
"Ooh! I guess I'll see you there, Bro!" she says going past me in the doorway.
"Why are you going to a party hosted by a guy in my grade?" I ask her confused at what my sister; a pretty cool person would be doing caught at a grade 10 party.
"Are we talking about the same party? I'm talking about Liam's party." She says confusedly cocking her head to the side a bit.
"Oh… I'm talking about Kyle's, but Liam's his brother so it's probably the same one." I nod as the realization comes to my mind. "Okay! We should carpool." She adds as she walks away down the stairs.
I hop in the shower and get myself ready for the day before going down stairs to see that my mom is not home. "Can you tell Brady to get ready? We have chores to split up!" Lydia yells from the kitchen. Ugh! Chores suck!
After making sure Brady gets up and gets ready I go back down the stairs to the kitchen where Lydia is already tidying up busily.
"You guys took too long! I split up the chores myself… I've got kitchen and laundry. Cam, you have living room and dining room. Brady you're doing the bathroom and the basement!" Lydia orders us while she wipes the counter.
"Okay" I agree going into the dining room to start tidying the table. "Why do I always get the bathroom?" Brady groans irritated as he makes his way up the stairs.
"You wake up last!" Lydia calls back at him as she continues to clean the kitchen. I vacuum the floor quickly and put things where they belong and finish my chores before 11.
"Where's mom anyway?" I ask Lydia curiously as she brings a basket of clean clothes upstairs. "She went to get her hair cut and then to the grocery store." She tells me as she sits on the couch and starts folding the clothes.
I sit down on the coffee table and help Lydia fold the clothes in the basket, and sort them into piles according to who they belong to before bringing me and Brady's piles up to our bedroom and placing his on his bed.
I put my clothes away before heading back down to see my mother had arrived back at home. "Hey mom. Love the new do!" Lydia greets her as she sits folding a new basket full of clothes.
"Cam, could you help me bring in the groceries!" she asks me with a smile. "Sure thing, mom" I say walking past her in the door and to the trunk to grab a couple bags.
Once I get back into the house m mother is talking to Lydia and I carry the groceries in my hands through to the kitchen.
As I walk back through to grab more bags I hear my mother say something to Lydia about her having a date tonight.
"What?" I ask shocked butting into their conversation. "Cam, it's no big deal. I'm just going out on a date with a very nice man tonight." She tells me with a happy smile as she folds one of Brady's plain t-shirts.
"What about dad?" I ask her as I start to feel anxious and upset about the news.
"Your father has been gone for 3 years, Cam. I have to move on at some point. What better time than the present?" She adds shrugging her shoulders continuing to help Lydia fold.
The thought of my mother dating anyone ever again never even crossed my mind. It bugs me to think that she is trying to replace dad. I mean I understand that he's never coming back and she gets lonely, but dating? Really? It seems so juvenile for a person her age.
"Do you think he would want his wife dating other men?" I ask my mother snippily.
"I like to think that your father would like us all to be happy, and if that means me finding companionship then I'm sure he'd be okay with it." She says not looking away from the clothes.
"He would not be okay with it!" I snap back at her irately. "Well, I don't think that it's your place to tell me what you think he would want. I am a grown woman capable of making my own choices, and I choose to start dating again." She retorts back obviously getting frustrated with me.
"I can't even believe you're doing this, so much for loving dad!" I yell at her in disbelief. What is she even thinking?
"Don't accuse me of not loving your father! I gave that man everything and I loved him more than anything! I don't want to be alone the rest of my life because of something I had no control over. Please Campbell, understand that I can only be a mourning widow for so long." My mother shouts more angrily than I have ever heard her shout.
"Lydia, what do you think about this?" I ask my sister angrily. "I think that you should chill out. Mom should be happy too." She snarls while folding laundry.
"I'm taking a walk." I say irritated as I walk out the door.
Does no one see how mad dad would be if he saw mom dating another man? Does no one care? Am I the only person in my family who still gives a damn?
I wander around the neighborhood for a few hours before unconsciously stumbling upon the field about a mile from my house where my dad taught me how to play soccer when I was a kid. I was wrong about what I said the other night. I could never hate him.
His last actions may have scarred me for life, but he was a good dad and he was a good husband to my mom. How could she do this to him? To us?
I really don't want to be around to see her with another man and I'm certain that I'm not the only one. Brady would probably agree with me even if Lydia is being ridiculous and siding with mom.
She fights with mom about everything and now the one thing that mom is doing that I don't agree with she does. She's supposed to side with me on something like this. Why does she want mom to try to replace dad?
Obviously mom could never replace dad. He was awesome when he was happy. When Lydia and I were little he was happy all of the time. I think he started having issues when I was about 5, and after that he would come in and out of being sad.
It got worse as time went on and near the time of his death he didn't really talk to us that often. He was happy maybe twice a month. I have no idea why he didn't talk to Doctor Reed about switching his medicine. The Zoloft was obviously not working the way it was supposed to.
I'm no stranger to sadness, but I can't even imagine how he felt everyday to feel that the only way out was to kill himself. I hope I never have to endure that sadness.
I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket and I see that it's Maya. "Hey, where are you? Your mom came over here looking for you."
Oh great... Now my mom is worried about where I am. I've been gone for four hours and now she cares. Okay!
I decide to text Maya back "I'm at Pine Ridge Field… Don't tell her. I don't really want to talk to her right now. I'm cooling off."
Not even seconds later my phone starts ringing and it's Maya this time instead fo my mom who had called me 9 times in the last hour.
"Hey… what's up?" I ask her as casually as I can as I sit underneath a tree.
"What happened? Should I walk over there? Do you need to talk to someone?" Maya asks me with worry in her voice. Knowing about my anxiety issues probably sent her into worry mode as soon as she found out I was missing.
"I don't NEED to talk to anyone. I'm just trying to get my head around something. You can come if you want, but please don't worry about me just because I'm crazy." I add laughing into the phone, but not hearing even a giggle on the other end.
"Cam, it's not funny. She had me thinking you were dead. I'm coming to the field. Don't move a muscle." She tells me into the phone before hanging up.
Is my mom seriously that worried about me? She has no reason to think that I'm doing anything other than what I said I was doing which is taking a walk. After she lays something that huge and upsetting on me she has to expect that I;m not going to want to talk to her.
Maya pulls up on her bike and I see her grab her phone out of her pocket as she looks anxiously around for me. "Over here!" I wave at her from under the tree. She walks her bike through the grass over to me and sits next to me grabbing my hand.
"Hey, don't scare me like that." she tells me obviously feeling relief in seeing that I'm fine.
"Maya, I'm not some loser who tries to hurt himself." I sigh sadly with a frown as she leans her head on m shoulder.
"Okay… well, your mother doesn't know that. She's really worried. I told her that you're fine, and that I was going around the neighborhood to look for you." Maya lets me know still holding my hand tightly.
"What does she think I'm gonna kill myself because she's being an idiot? That's ridiculous." I groan annoyed at my mother's actions.
"What happened between you two anyway? You never fight with your mom." Maya adds worriedly looking at me.
"She's going to start dating tonight. I don't think that she should… I don't think my dad would want her to date anyone." I tell Maya with a frown as I continue to think of my mother's betrayal to my father.
Maya raises one of her eyebrows at me and looks at me bewildered. "You don't think that your mom should date anyone because your dad wouldn't want her to?" she asks clarifying the situation for herself as I nod in agreement with her words.
"Cam, that's ridiculous." She says letting go of my hand.
"Why is it ridiculous to think that he wouldn't want that for her?" I ask her annoyed that she is siding with my mom. I thought that at least my girlfriend would see this through my eyes… or at least try to.
"Let's say that he's looking down at her and doesn't want her to date anyone, which for the record I highly doubt. Anyway hypothetically, he doesn't want her to date… why should that stop her?" Maya asks me curiously.
"She should respect that!" I tell her irritated as I stand up from my seat under the tree.
"Why? Do you think she wanted him to kill himself?" she asks standing up too.
"Of course not" I reply as if it should be obvious which it is. "Well then why should she be lonely just because he left her by herself with 3 kids?" Maya asks me calmly clearly trying to make me see things her way.
"Because no one can replace my dad!" I yell at my girlfriend angrily starting to get frustrated with her.
Maya cowers slightly looking scared of me, but I don't even feel bad. I still feel angry at her for not agreeing with me.
"She knows that no one can replace him. She's just tired of being sad about it. You should understand that." she tells me gently placing a hand on my shoulder.
"Don't tell me what I should understand, and don't touch me. Just leave me alone, okay!" I yell at her ripping my shoulder out from under her hand aggressively.
How did she manage to make me feel worse about this? How did she manage to make me mad at her? I haven't been mad at Maya since I was 11…
"I'm not going to leave you when you're this upset." She continues trying to appear calm, but I can see the tears threatening to spill.
"Alright, you stay. I'm going." I tell her furiously starting to walk away.
"Cam, wait." She calls running after me and grabbing my hand. "Maya, I'm pissed off. Can you please just respect that I need a little space?" I scream at her continuing down the road faster as she watches me walk away sadly.
Go back, Cam. She's right and you know it. You wish that she wasn't but she is. Mom didn't choose to be left here and no one can dictate what she wants to do or not do.
You probably made Maya cry with the way you were screaming at her! Go apologize before she breaks up with you!
Now I've got fucking voices in my head… What the hell is wrong with me? I find a new place to sit and sulk in my unhappiness and stay there behind the dumpsters by Degrassi for hours ignoring every call I get from my mother, Lydia, and Maya.
I don't want to talk to any of them… I want to sit here by myself and just yell. I realize that I'm overreacting, but I can't stop. I find myself getting more enraged with every passing moment and I don't know why… If I go home I might do something I regret so I stay here still trying to cool down.
Okay... tell me what you think! Love you guys!