Title: The Beautiful Lie 11/?
Fandom: Rizzoli and Isles
Pairing: Jane Rizzoli/Maura Isles
Spoilers: No...not really
Rating: R to NC-17
Disclaimer: I don't own them. I'm just playing around with them for a while.

Summary: Jane has to deal with changes in Maura's life and her feelings surrounding them.

2:03am.

The red numbers on her dashboard seemed to glare at her in mocking fashion, but Maura needed no reminder of her sleepless nights. She knew the blame rested solely on her shoulders. The city shined through her windows alive and well. It was a sure sign that life had continued merrily. She almost smiled at the irony as she literally passed it by only to see it continue to encroach again and again.

A bone deep weariness settled into her being, but Maura ignored knowing it would offer her no peace. It was a false hope of sleep only to have memories flood her and what could have been taunt her. A few hours here and there were all she could glean, but Maura was no fool…not in this. Without sleep, her work would suffer. A minute mistake and a killer could walk free. It was the last thing she wanted. It was one of the many reasons she drove with such purpose at such a loathsome hour in the morning.

One of the other reasons had become a refrain. I have to fix this. Knowledge weighed heavily on her shoulders, reminding her that it may be too little too late. Maura carried the burden but there was no honor in it. She swallowed down the ball of emotion clogging her throat. If I could just get her to look at me again.

Maura's mind reeled with memories of Jane's laughter, her smile, and her touch, causing a shiver to work its way down her spine. It was almost as if she were remembering the dead, but wasn't it tantamount to that? The Jane she knew was gone, but Maura did not want to mourn the death.

She was planning a resurrection.

Maura merged onto the exit that led her downtown. She had lofty goals and no idea how to achieve them. All of them centered around Jane. This night had seemingly been no different as Maura sat in a home that had become barren with a stark loneliness that permeated her every pore. Honesty bled through once more and she found that Jane was the one thing she missed the most. It was a conclusion reached without the help of alcohol but aided by something deep within.

Peter had been set free.

Jane was the one loss that left a terrible, gaping hole that seemed to radiate pain. As Maura curled around the agony and let the tears fall, she knew this ache was in no way comparable to the fear that led her here. This ache usurped it all.

Tears burned her eyes, and Maura wiped at them angrily. Jane had been right. I don't deserve the release of tears. Still, they refused to listen and came anyway, but there was no one to see. Simply put there was no one period.

Maura gasped. It was the truth, but she had no other choice than to reach out to an old friend, a former lover who had served as the catalyst to this all. Will she even help me? Recalling, Addison's parting words, desperation arced through Maura, leaving her trembling in its wake. "She has to."

As she pulled into The Ritz's parking lot, Maura caught a glimpse of herself in the rearview mirror. Sans make up, she was pale. Heavy dark circles looked like permanent smudges. Bloodless lips trembled. Her hair was a wild mess that she lacked the ability to tame at the moment even with a hair tie. She was a broken mess.

Glancing down at her attire, Maura choked back a sob as she peered down at the ratty Red Sox t-shirt Jane had left ages ago. She barely remembered pulling it on but just wanted to be closer to the one thing that was a continent away. Is this what she felt…feels? Pathetic and helpless? No wonder she wants to hate me.

Maura's mind took a moment to wrap itself around that concept. Hate- to dislike intensely and passionately. Passionately. It wasn't the absence of feeling. It was far from it. It was a small hope, but one Maura had to cling to. Pushing the car door open, Maura stepped out into the balmy night.

Maura heard a growl as Addison opened the door. The woman in question pushed flaming red locks from her face and scowled as she tied the brief silk robe tight around her. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

Maura blinked and whispered, "Yes."

Addison eyelids flicked rapidly as if trying to focus her vision, and Maura knew the second that she had. A gasp emerged. "Maura? Are you okay?"

Maura released a sound somewhere in between a laugh and a sob. "No. It's seems I haven't been for a long time."

After a long breath, Addison nodded. "True."

The door remained a barrier between them. "I know that I have no right. I find myself in need of a friend right now, and I've literally exhausted my one possibility."

Addison let out a bark of laughter. "I'm your last resort, huh?" She pushed the door open. "Come in then. Mind you, I've been trying to be your friend the whole time."

Maura took a step forward but as an afterthought, she asked. "I'm not interrupting anything am I?" Am I selfish even in this?

"My God, I'm not that big of a whore." Addison paused. "She left about an hour ago." Her mouth turned upward slightly.

Maura returned the gesture.

Another beat. "It wasn't Jane either if that's what you're thinking." Addison added softly.

Feeling ashamed, Maura looked down at her feet then up again. "I deserved that, but I know."

Addison nodded once more and led Maura toward the couch. "You need anything? Coffee?"

"No, I'm awake enough without the help of caffeine." Maura sat primly on the sofa.

Silence lapsed between them. Maura peered into Addison's expectant gaze. "I-I've made a mess of things, Addison, and I want to fix it." Her voice was thick with regret. "You should have seen the way she looked at me…the things she said…I never thought it would be that way between us."

"But it is." Addison reached out, wrapping Maura's hand into her own. "And you look like utter shit so I think you finally understand the situation."

Maura pushed on. There was no need to acknowledge what was so painfully clear. "Peter's gone. I couldn't do that to him. I couldn't do it to Jane or myself." Maura looked away feeling lost. The squeeze of her hand brought her back.

"That's one of the smartest things you've ever done, but I've never been one to sugar coat things. It might be too late." Addison added bluntly.

"I know, and I don't know what to do."

An auburn brow rose. "And I'm the one you've come to for advice? You have seen my track record right?"

"I have, but you've gotten to know her."

"Somewhat, but I don't know her as well as you do. How to you feel about her Maura?" Addison asked.

"I-I don't know. It's all so confusing. Right now, I've never felt so lost…so empty. She won't talk to me. She won't even…look at me." Maura sucked in a shaky breath. Still, she continued. "You scared me Addison. I had no idea what to do with all the intensity and the need so I ran. Jane." Maura paused, swallowing and preparing herself to make the admission. "Jane terrifies me. I can't breathe when she's around. I can't think. I'm not myself but it seems I'm the same way without her. How is that possible?"

"When did you notice—" Addison started.

"I don't know. If I'm completely honest with myself, it started to a lesser degree long ago."

"It's about time. Don't you think to be completely honest with yourself?"

"Yes, I have to agree. Too much has happened for me not to be. I'm just sorry it took this long and so many people were hurt." Maura's grip on Addison's hand tightened. "So what do I do?"

"I'm not some oracle, Maura. I don't have all the answers, but I can tell you this much. Jane loves you, but she doesn't trust you for shit. My guess is that's where you have to start. She's also one of the most stubborn bull headed people I've ever met, so you'll have your work cut out for you. I hope you're not above begging."

"I'm not. I've learned that I'm not above anything." I'm capable of some horrid things. There has to be a comparable dichotomy.

Addison's expression turned quizzical as she peered at Maura for several silent seconds. She reached out fingering the shirt. "Is that hers?"

Blood rushed to Maura's face self-consciously. "Yes, I-"

Addison clucked her tongue. "Oh sweetie, you have it just as bad as she does."

Puzzled, Maura asked, "Pardon?"

Tapping on Maura's temple. "There's somebody home in there. Otherwise, you'd still be engaged to Peter. I know I don't feel that way about my friends…the few that I have anyway."

Maura searched through her confusion. "I'm not sure—?"

"How did it feel when she kissed you?"

Maura couldn't help herself. She gasped as an electric tendril shimmered over her skin. "I-"

"No need to answer. It's written all over your face. I'm your friend. Do I make you feel that way now?"

Maura shook her head. "Well, no…" A dim light began to form.

"Good because it's not normal to want to fuck your friends, Maura." Addison grinned crookedly.

The light exploded with illumination. "Are you saying…is this what it feels-? I don't know the first thing…" Maura babbled.

"Uh huh. The great Maura Isles is human after all and very much in love. I wouldn't worry about not knowing what to do. If you can convince Jane you're on the up and up this time, I don't think you'll have a problem figuring it all out. She's a take the bull by the balls kinda girl. She could probably teach us both about taking a bite out of life and all that."

Everything dimmed around Maura and for a second, she found that she couldn't breathe. Revelation rushed over her and through her like a barreling truck, filling her with wonder. This is why I wanted to escape. This is why there was Peter. This is why I tried to push her away, and this is why she terrifies me. A single word escaped, "Oh." It wasn't much on the surface, but within were the answers to everything.

"Yep." Addison smiled winningly.

Laughter escaped. "Well, why didn't you explain this to me at the beginning?" The weight on her shoulders lightened minutely.

Addison rolled her eyes. "Because you and Jane have something in common besides wanting to tear each other's clothes off, you're both stubborn …incredibly so."

"Well, I guess that's an accurate depiction."

"Damn straight it is. Promise me something for your sake and Jane's?" Addison asked.

"Yes?"

"No more running. No matter how hard it gets, and it's going to be hard."

Maura sucked in a deep breath, realizing that the burden was still there just in another form. "I-I'll try, but I don't have much of a choice do I?"

"You don't. Damned if you do and double damned if you don't. Are you ready?"

"No…yes…possibly?" Maura's tone wavered.

Addison chuckled. "I say that you use tonight as a litmus test or sorts."

"What are you—"

"That charity thing at City Hall? I'm tagging along."

"Oh, I'd forgotten. You don't think it's too soon? Maybe I should give it the weekend at least?" Maura's tone had a desperate, uncertain edge to it.

"No, no. You need to strike while the iron is hot, and I do mean hot. You've seen her in her dress uniform right? I can only imagine. My God, if you don't want her—"

Maura's eyes narrowed as she squeezed Addison's hand hard, pulling the red head toward her. "I get the point."

Addison smirked. "I like this new possessive jealous thing you have going. It's sexy as hell. I guess we'll see you there."

Addison stared at the closed door for several seconds. It had been the last thing she was expecting, but it was a welcome surprise. Maura had grown some balls. It was yet to be determined how big they were going to be, but Addison knew they were going to have to be gigantic to sway Jane. Good luck, Maura. She's not in a good place.

She peered at the door again. Her visitors over the past few days had been very strange. To make matters even more interesting, both of them had come to confess in their own way and seek some sort of absolution. Addison snorted. When had she become Addison Montgomery keeper of secrets and love guru? Rising from the couch, she shook her head and muttered, "I guess I set myself up for that one."

Jane groaned as she rose from the cot. It squeaked in protest as the ancient springs righted themselves. She stretched and moaned as battered vertebra snapped back into place. The oblivion of sleep had barely kissed her this night, but still Jane laid there staring up at the scarred ceiling, seeing nothing in the darkness.

After flipping on the light, she peered down at her watch. It was still early. It was early enough for her to wash up and change so no one would be the wiser. Jane could imagine the lecture she would get from Vince and the looks from Frost, and she wanted none of it. Her plate was grossly full and there was damn sure no room for anything else.

Jane had been right.

She was in no way prepared for this level of anguish. There had been periods of time where she had to remain completely still in fear of breaking into a million pieces. There had been times that she knew that if the tears started they would not stop, and somewhere sandwiched in between, there had been times where she faced what lay ahead with grim acceptance and stoicism. Jane's hope was that those times would grow and last longer than a few measly minutes. But it is what it is and I don't have a choice.

Jane could have gone home to a warm bed and familiar surroundings, but at the moment, all it housed were memories. Memories that she was in no way prepared for as she lay in her bed, loafed on her couch or walked through her kitchen. Jane had to deal with the near debilitating pain first. There had to be some way to dull the sharpness before she stepped from the frying pan into an even hotter fire. Until Jane figured it out even minutely, one of the cots in the precinct was going to have her name on it.

Jane pushed her hand through what she knew was insanely mussed hair and sighed. She had alternatives. Addison would have been more than welcoming. Her mother would have accepted her with open arms, but Jane had dismissed them both. Even though, her mother had been gracious enough to take Jo with no questions asked. At the moment, no one knew of her self-imposed exile, and Jane was going to try her best to keep it that way. She was tired of asking for help. Words and hugs could only go so far. I have to get through this just like everything else.

She rubbed a hand over her face and tried not to think anymore, but even her mind no longer belonged to her as snapshots of Maura filtered in. The images were so real that Jane wanted to reach out and touch them- Maura laughing, smiling, and wearing an expression of faux exasperation. As if on remote, she paused over the last image. It was the one of Maura crying and begging. Something fluttered in Jane's chest, and she wondered in perverse fascination how they had fallen so far.

Pain and rage ripped through her, robbing her of breath and leaving her shaking like some wounded thing. Jane leaned against the cold concrete wall and willed it to pass. This must be what hell is like. It seemed like an eternity had passed before she could function again. Jane knew she had to take advantage of these moments to project some sense of normalcy. With that in mind, she began to move with purpose.

Jane peered up as a large cup of coffee appeared on her desk. Frost flashed her a muted smile.

"Am I fucking off this morning?" He asked.

Jane bit the inside of her cheek. Part of her was ashamed but the other part saw the humor in it. "No. Not if that coffee is as strong as it looks."

"I gotta ask. I want to be prepared for whatever you throw at me." Frost sat on the edge of her desk. His grinned widened.

Jane sighed in exasperation. "You are one of the most irritating people I've ever met, and I mean that in the most sincere way possible." I can't help but love him for trying to be there for me.

"I wish I could quit you too," Frost simpered. The look on his face was equally as priceless.

A burst of laughter flew from Jane's mouth. She looked at her partner in surprise. She had been sure there had been no room for laughter in the jumbled up mess she had become.

Frost chuckled in triumph and held up his hand when Jane opened her mouth to speak. "Uh uh, no taking it back. I heard it." He paused for a moment. "So can you still fit into your dress uniform?"

Jane wanted to kiss him for the strategic change in subject. "Oh yeah, haven't gained more than a pound or two since joining the force."

"You disgust me, but I have to say. I think I'm all muscle."

"I think it's just your head that's gotten bigger." Jane deadpanned. She gleaned onto the familiarity between them in hopes it would bolster her for the remainder of the day.

"Mmm, could be." Frost just thankfully pushed right along. "You bringing Addison?"

"Yeah."

A sudden silence stretched between them.

Jane glanced up at her partner to see a faraway look in his eyes. "Frost?"

There was nothing.

"Frost!" Jane smacked his arm.

"Huh?" He licked his lips and wiped his chin. "Sorry, I was just having dirty thoughts."

Jane sighed. "I'm not even going to ask."

"No need. You've seen every glorious inch already."

"I'm going to tell her you said that. She'd chew you up and spit you out, you know?" Jane said affectionately.

"Oh God, I know." Frost growled.

"Get away from my desk. You're grossing me out."

"Fine. I'm going."

When she was alone again in a sea of detectives, Jane picked up the coffee cup only to see her hand trembling. She sat it down quickly. I will not fucking fall apart. Not here. The moment passed. Jane reached for the cup again.

A few minutes later, Jane's phone rang. She stared at it for a few seconds, knowing who it was. It had become a strange routine of sorts as if they were secretly coordinating. First Addison would check in with her and then her mother.

Jane snatched up the receiver. "Yeah?"

"You know, if I had your voice to go with everything else, I'd be irresistible?"

Rolling her eyes, Jane remained silent.

"First, don't roll your eyes at me. Secondly, you don't think so?"

"Good morning, Addison."

"I know we're not fucking anymore, but would it cheer you up to know that I'm naked?"

Jane sighed. "No, but Frost would be on top of the world."

"Huh, he's the black guy not the old guy right?"

"That would be him," Jane answered tiredly.

"He's cute. Love those eyes and that smile. If I were straight, I'd try really hard to break him in two."

Jane's lips twitched, and she couldn't hide the mirth in her voice. "It will be his fantasy fulfilled."

"You can smile you know? Laugh too. It's my mission in life right now to make sure you do."

"I know, and don't think I don't appreciate it. It's just hard enough right now to put one foot in front of the other." Jane paused, surprising herself with the admission. "Look, I don't want to lay anything else on you—"

"God, I wish you would for old times' sake. The pickings around here are very slim."

Before Jane could even repeat the sentence in her head, she was smiling. Nothing like someone thinking you're hot shit… "Addison…" She drew the name out as if exasperated. Her and Frost could be peas in a pod.

"Jane." Addison gave as good as she got. "You know you liked it."

"I did," Jane admitted. "Still feel like petrified shit though."

"Well, for a few seconds you didn't that's a start."

A giant knot began to form in Jane's throat. She needed to change the subject. "Will you get my uniform from my place for me? I-I didn't want to just stuff it in my locker."

"Not a problem. I'll bring it back to the hotel with me. You can just come here to get all dolled up. I want pictures for posterity while you're all fresh."

Jane stated her acquiescence and hung up the phone.

Barely ten minutes after and just like clock-work, Angela Rizzoli had her turn. Before Jane brought the receiver to her ear, her mother was talking.

"I know you're not okay so don't even try it with me."

"Okay." Jane said irritably. "Can I hang up now then?"

"No! I just wanted to make sure you were—"

"Okay?" Jane interrupted.

"Well…yes." Angela answered contritely.

"I'm not, but I'm here. Okay?"

"Okay," Angela answered softly.

Jane leaned against the elevator railing as it traveled upward. The day had been a veritable hodge podge. Some parts flew by while others crept along at a snail's pace. These were the times when she felt her veneer cracking. Either way, Jane was ready for it to be over. Her plan was to smile, shake hands, kiss ass, and get out of the function as soon as humanly possible. Any environment was preferable than the one she was about to enter.

The elevator dinged and Jane exited, shuffling past the couple closer to the front. A few seconds later, she was knocking on Addison's door. Addison smiled and twirled in an effort to fish for compliments. Jane smiled half-heartedly. "Frost is going to shit a brick."

"I'm glad somebody will. I don't usually get this dressed up to go home alone." Addison waved her toward the bedroom. "Come on. Let's get you situated. It's probably not a good idea for you to be late."

Jane followed her dutifully. All the while wishing that tomorrow had already come.

With a critical eye, Maura peered at her reflection in the full length mirror. She wanted to see utter perfection because inside she was a tangled mass of nerves. She moved a single lock of hair back over her shoulder, noticing the tremble in her hand immediately.

My IQ is well over 140. I know every muscle, bone and organ in the human body. I can speak effortlessly on a myriad of subjects. She brought sweaty palms together demanding their stillness. I know nothing of this, nothing of love. Maura swallowed down the sudden surge of fear-fear of rejection, fear of acceptance, and fear of being completely overwhelmed. Despite it all, Maura knew it was the right thing to do. It was the only thing to do. I have to try.

Maura let her hands fall to her sides, looking once more into the mirror. The green strapless dress accentuated every curve and shimmered as she moved. In a strange dichotomy, she felt strong, fragile, vulnerable and exposed. Her eyes glittered richly back at her as determination and a host of other emotions churned within.

She was the picture of perfection, the epitome, and it was time to live.

"So there's nothing I can do to change your mind?" Frost asked.

Addison laughed as she draped an arm over his shoulder. "Grow a vagina?"

Jane rolled her eyes as Frost chuckled in response. It was warm and familiar here between them and Jane soaked it all in, knowing that the night would be just as cold as the one before.

"With those eyes and smile, I bet you would look good in drag." Addison added with a raised brow.

There was total silence.

Jane peered at her partner and canted her head to the side in a moment of true enjoyment. His mouth opened and closed like a floundering fish.

Korsak chose that moment to join their group and Frost found his voice. "Only if Korsak does it first."

Addison looked to Jane for help. Her only response was to shrug. With narrowed eyes, Jane saw the promise of retribution.

"Ah, no. That's okay." Addison muttered before sipping at her drink.

"What's going on?" Korsak asked.

"What you don't think he'd be pretty?" Frost continued.

Addison's smile was wide as she shot Frost the finger.

"Anybody gonna tell me what's going on here?" Korsak's tone was irritated.

"Philosophical discussion, Korsak." Jane volunteered.

Korsak peered at them all skeptically. "Uh huh. So, I was thinking when all the big wigs finally get here we can knock all the hob nobbing off as a group then go get shit faced. What do you think?"

"I think I like you." Addison chimed in.

"Sounds good to me." Frost answered.

They all turned to look at Jane. It felt good to be with friends…with people who cared. Jane realized she wanted to hold on to that feeling for a little while longer. "Sure."

They smiled in her direction.

"But not if you're going to stand there grinning like mannequins."

They chuckled in response.

Long minutes later, Jane had smiled so much that her lips hurt. She wiped her hand on her slacks and tried to keep track of the conversation going on around her.

"I don't understand how a person could be that rich and smell like that." Frost added.

"I know. Is Binaca still around?" Addison asked.

The three of them including Korsak broke into giggles.

Jane decided that she couldn't take them anywhere. A gasp made Jane peer at Addison.

"Ho-ly shit." Korsak muttered.

"What?" Jane asked in confusion. She turned to see what they were looking at. Time stilled as Maura entered, and she was breathtaking.

Jane heard the roar of blood in her ears as her heart spasmed in an attempt to contain the wave of emotion assailing her. Her face felt hot and white spots began to appear before her eyes before she remembered to breathe. She blinked once and realized with intense trepidation that Maura was closer.

Her first instinct was to run, and Jane turned to do just that until a hand on her forearm stopped her. Jane whipped around to see the culprit. Addison looked back at her with a sad smile. "Don't Jane." Verdant eyes implored her.

Then, Jane realized that if she ran now she would always be running. There was no escape from this. She nodded her head and steeled herself to take the bombardment of pain and anger until she couldn't anymore. Just hold it together just a little while longer.

Bubbling just under the surface, Jane watched as Maura smiled demurely at Korsak and Frost as the compliments fell from their lips. Addison smirked and raised her glass in Maura's direction. There's something not right there.

And then, Maura was front and center. Jane's insides trembled at the scent of her perfume, and for a moment everything around them disappeared as their eyes met. Jane saw regret. She saw determination. She saw need. The cold chill of awareness wriggled down Jane's spine and raced over her skin. Damn her. But, she also saw fear. It was enough to break the spell and bring the world back again. Jane was the first to look away.

"Jane." Her name was whispered breathlessly, reverently.

Jane's heart lurched to her throat and she tried to swallow down the acid taste of anger. She has no right to say my name that way. "Maura," Jane returned tightly.

Maura reached out and ran a fingertip over the lapel of her jacket. Jane flinched as if she had been slapped. Breath stilted in her chest, and Jane took a hurried step backward, needing to breathe.

Refusing to shy away, with the same finger, Maura traced the brim of her hat. What. The. Fuck. Overwhelmed by anger, need and the heat radiating from Maura's body, Jane captured her wrist. They peered at each other once more. "Don't play with me." Jane growled.

"I'm not. Please, let's not make a scene. I don't think either one of us wants that."

"Then go fucking bother someone else!" Jane whispered harshly.

Something flickered in Maura's eyes, and her lips trembled. "I'm where I want to be."

Jane wanted to laugh at the incredulity of the statement. She peered to the side to see if her friends were hearing this line of shit only to find that they had disappeared. They took with them the warmth and protection. Completely overwhelmed by all she was feeling, Jane hissed, "Fine! Then, I'll leave."

As discreetly as she could, Jane moved toward a large throng of people. Shaken but resolved, she smiled and continued to kiss ass. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up as a familiar smell wafted toward her nose. Then, a hand inched its way from her shoulders down to her spine followed by the dull scratch of Maura's nails as she gathered the material there in her fist, holding it hostage. Arousal slammed into her like an unrelenting wave and Jane wondered if she could die from the impact. Fuck!

Jane dropped the hand she was shaking. "Uh, excuse me. I-I need some air." Pulling herself from Maura's grasp, Jane rushed to the nearest exit. I just need to breathe! She screamed at herself. Frantically, she looked down the empty hallway and hoped that at least once office was unlocked and free.

Within a couple of minutes, she found one. Jane pushed the door open hard enough to make the it rattle. Moving inside, she remove her hat and tugged the first few buttons of her shirt loose. Feeling less constricted, Jane sucked wind as if she had been deprived it for a dangerous amount of time. God dammit! What the fuck does she think she's doing?

The door closed behind her. Jane whirled around to find Maura walking toward her. Her hackles rose even higher. She lashed out accordingly. "What is this? Fuck with Jane night?" She sneered and suddenly realized that Maura was missing something. "Where's my twin?"

Maura paused but didn't halt her advance until they were face to face. "I deserved that, but he won't be coming. By mutual agreement, we ended the engagement."

"So," Jane laughed unkindly. "You think I'm going to just fall at your feet?" Inside, Jane sputtered in surprise, but she knew that she hid it well.

Maura's eyes seemed to glow from within, full of promise. "No, that would be easy, Jane, and that's something you're not."

"Bout time you got something fucking straight."

"I agree."

"Whatever. I meant what I said, Maura. We have nothing to discuss!"

Maura flinched as if Jane had physically assaulted her, and for a moment, Jane enjoyed her pain. Then, she felt her forehead crinkle in confusion and apprehension as Maura reached out and trailed fingertips over the line of her chin.

Jane jerked away. "Don't fucking touch me!" Feeling out of control again, Jane stepped forward. "You have no fucking rights to me!" Before she could stop herself, Jane grasped Maura's shoulders. The heat from her bare skin scorched her, but still she shook her and screamed. "You threw them away remember?"

Feeling violently overwhelmed by her emotions, Jane pushed Maura backwards, wanting to get away from her but completely unable to let go. Maura aided in the endeavor trying to pull away but bumping into a nearby wall in the process.

The fear in Maura's eyes fed Jane but the determination still glinting infuriated her. Jane pinned Maura against the wall. The brush of their bodies burned her, filling the air with the heat between them.

Maura's breath was ragged. Her chest heaved, bringing even more attention to the body Jane wanted to possess and the person she wanted to hate. "Fuck you, Maura!"

Tears fell from Maura's eyes.

Jane wanted to scream as her remaining sanity abandoned her. "Fuck you," Jane whispered again as she surged forward. Their lips crashed together violently, hungrily, and Jane reveled in the anger behind it. Her hands snaked through Maura's hair, grasping it by the handfuls and yanking, ordering Maura to open wider as she continued to conquer and plunder what she knew should be hers.

Maura's whimpers filled her mouth, and Jane swallowed them whole. Maura strained against her, and it only took a second for Jane to realize that Maura wasn't fighting.

She was only trying to get closer.

Triumph soared through her mingling with an unforgiving crest of arousal. Jane moaned loudly as hands found a way under her jacket and nails scraped down her back. Jane shuddered. The sounds Maura were making became needy, desperate. They singed Jane's blood to a boiling hot consistency.

Jane tore her mouth away only to bite into a bare shoulder. Maura cried out. Jane's tongue flicked over the area again and again soothing and tasting simultaneously. Each breath Maura took was followed by a whimper. It splashed over Jane's skin like droplets of fire.

Jane grasped Maura's hips, crushing them together. They met each other thrust for thrust. It wasn't enough. As Jane found Maura's lips again, she reached down, bunching the dress up inch by glorious inch, and she didn't stop until her fingers grazed over silky panties.

In a blatant sign of ownership, she cupped Maura through the dampening confines, pressing hard enough to be felt, to be remembered. Maura's cry was guttural as she ripped her mouth away to say the one thing Jane needed to hear most.

"Jane!"

Jane peered into Maura's eyes to see in them what she had wanted all along.

Somehow, at that moment a frisson of uncertainty fought its way through and settled deep into Jane's belly. She blinked and tried to will it away, but when her gaze returned to Maura she remembered the deceit, the doubt, and the ambiguity of it all.

It was like being thrown into a frozen lake.

As Maura pressed down, grinding on her hand, Jane stumbled backward, detaching herself completely. Maura groaned and reached out clumsily in hopes of renewing the contact.

Jane moved further away. "Look at me," she husked. God! What kind of idiot am I?

Maura released a ragged breath and trembled. The green gaze held passion and a tenderness that Jane had never seen before. She shook it off as wishful thinking. "You're going to have to work harder than that," Jane whispered snidely.

The silence stretched between them.

Finally, Maura moved as if in pain as she tried to straighten her dress. Catching Jane's gaze once more, Maura muttered, "I know."

Floored by the statement, Jane stood stock still and slack jawed. The only thing she could do was watch as Maura left the office. She was alone again, but something had changed. Somehow a challenge had been issued, and for once, Jane's thoughts were quiet. She peered at the door wanting to believe but knowing that she shouldn't.

Peter threw his keys and briefcase in a nearby chair as he sat on the couch with a package in tow. He sat it on the table and peered at it for what seemed like hours. Finally, he got up to pour himself a drink, making it a double.

When he sat back down, he reached for it, tearing through the plain brown wrapping and the box itself in a garish parody of a kid on Christmas morning. Peter emptied the contents on the cushion beside him and exhaled shakily.

There it was in the box he had gifted it in. Peter flipped it open and let the pain wash over him in waves. Snapping it shut, he knew that he had been right about at least one thing. He did deserve better. He smiled sadly then laughed at himself realizing that he was a nice guy to the end. "Good luck, Maura." He lifted his glass in toast then polished off its contents.