Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

People are pretty mad at Edward right now, but I can't really blame you for that. Thank you for all your reviews and for voting on the poll. I have left the decision up to you guys and 72 % of you wanted…Well, I guess you'll have to read the chapter to find out. :)

Now for the bad news: "Taken" has been reported to the moderators and will most likely be removed. I don't know what will happen yet, just that some horrible woman wrote and informed me that she had reported it, because apparently she believes that I endorse kidnapping. I tried to tell her that this was just fiction and I would never think that stalking and kidnapping was ok in real life, but it didn't help any. I will find a new place to post if it gets taken down, and let you know.

My beta Melanie had been working hard this time and she deserves a special thanks!

Enjoy this chapter!

BPOV

"What do you mean, 'Edward left'?!" Angela shrieked loudly and threw up her free hand.

I stared at my friend with tired eyes that were sore and irritated from crying all morning. She was in a business suit and holding her usual barrel sized Starbucks cup.

"Exactly what I said. Edward left early this morning."

"Well, is he coming back?" she asked impatiently.

I shook my head.

Nope, I pretty much told him to stay gone. Why the hell did I do that? Oh right, to protect myself.

"No, I don't think he is, Angela," I whispered.

"Did you guys have a fight?" she asked carefully.

I let out a bitter laugh.

How do you fight with a guy who can't talk? It would be a pretty one sided argument.

"No, we didn't have a fight. He left because apparently he doesn't think that he's good enough for me, and that I should be with a man who can give me everything."

"He told you this?"

"He wrote me a letter," I said and pulled out a cigarette.

Angela scowled at me and I rolled my eyes in return.

I can have a goddamn cigarette if I want one!

I lit up and inhaled. It tasted awful and I put it out again with a frustrated sigh.

Now I can't even enjoy my one vice anymore! How much does my life suck? Let me count the ways…

"He wrote you a letter," Angela supplied and motioned for me to continue.

"Yeah, he said that he was sorry for hurting me, that I deserved better than him and that he wanted us to continue as friends. That was pretty much the gist of it," I muttered.

I didn't tell her the words of praise he had written about me; how I was beautiful, smart, kind and funny. How I was an angel to him and how he wished that he could be with me the way I deserved. Those words were too special to share with anyone. I would keep those for myself and store them in my heart.

"Friends?!" she half-yelled. "Motherfucking friends?! You have got to be shitting me! That's bullshit!"

I stared at her, slightly amused. Angela rarely cursed but when she did, she always went the extra mile.

"Sorry," she said and took a drink of her latte, which was most likely spiked with a double espresso shot. "But 'friends', Bella? He's crazy about you."

"Not enough, apparently," I said, feeling jaded.

"Did he really just leave while you were sleeping again?"

"No, err, I was awake," I said and looked down.

I could feel her eyes on me.

"Wait, did you two?" she started.

Fuck! What is she, orgasm-psychic?

"You did!" she exclaimed. "You slept with him, didn't you?"

"Yeah," I said reluctantly.

"And then he just left you? What an asshole!"

"No, he's not an asshole for sleeping with me. I asked him for sex," I admitted.

Correction, you asked him to make love to you. Love. Because you love him. Why didn't you tell him?!

I shook my head. Maybe I should have told him but I very much doubted that it would have made a difference to him. Edward was adamant about leaving.

"You asked him for sex? Why?" Angela asked, disbelievingly.

"Because I love him, ok!" I yelled, and hurled the pack of cigarettes towards the trashcan. "I love him and I wanted to be with him. And now he's gone and I told him that I couldn't see him again!"

I started sobbing into my hands and Angela stroked my hair gently.

"Oh, Bella," she said softly. "I'm so sorry. What can I do?"

I took a deep breath and collected myself. I had been crying for hours and now I had to stop.

"Can we do something today? Anything but sit around here. Are you free?" I asked her.

"Of course, honey. I can move some stuff around," she said with a smile. "What do you wanna do?"

"I don't really care. I just need a distraction. I'm not gonna go all zombie again," I said firmly. "It was Edward's choice to leave and I can't think about him anymore."

"Good for you," Angela said proudly. "How about a spa day followed by dinner and a trashy movie? We can throw popcorn on all the happy couples who are just there to make out!"

I couldn't help but laugh a little.

"That sounds perfect," I said.

"Excellent, it's my treat and I don't wanna hear a thing about it," she said and fished out her phone to find a spa for us.

Thank God for Angela! I just have to forget about Edward now and get back to the way things were before I met him. With the exception of Mike, of course!

* * *

The next couple of weeks dragged on slowly and even though I tried my best not to think about Edward, I couldn't keep him completely out of my mind. Late at night when I had numbed my mind with too much TV and finally lay in my quiet bedroom my thoughts always wandered to him. I tried not to cry too much for him, and told myself that this was for the best. This was what Edward wanted and I couldn't be with a man who didn't really want me.

I still saw Joe regularly and we had become close in the few weeks that followed Edward's departure. Tonight I was making him dinner and I had some great news for him. He came over around 6 as usual and used my shower before we sat down to eat. This had become a regular routine a few nights a week and I think he enjoyed it as much as I did. We rarely talked about Edward and that was a relief. Joe hadn't seen him since he left here, but assured me that this didn't mean that something bad had happened. Joe was sleeping on the couch a few nights a week here, and he had told me that sometimes he wouldn't see Edward for long periods of time depending on which shelters he slept in.

"Thank you for the shower and clothes, Bella," he said when he entered the kitchen in his outfit which I had washed since last time he was here.

"No problem. Dinner's ready," I said and served the steaks.

"Wow, what's the occasion?" he asked and eyed the huge T-bones.

"Sit down and I'll tell you," I said.

He looked curiously at me as I put the rest of the food out and offered him a drink. He chose water as usual and I did as well.

"Ok, I have some good news for you," I started.

"Really? I haven't had any of that in quite a while," he said with a grin.

"Well, I think your luck is turning, Joseph Jackson, because..."

I paused for emphasis and he leaned forward.

"I got you a job!" I almost yelled and bounced up and down in my chair.

He sat completely stunned for a few seconds.

"A…job?" he asked carefully. "In construction?"

"No, at the library," I explained quickly. "It's just part-time but I figured that it was a start, at least."

"Oh Bella, that's very nice of you, but I can't get a job without a permanent address," he said sadly. "It was so kind of you to think about me, though."

He patted my hand and smiled.

"Well, I already thought of that," I said. "I…I was going to ask you to move in here with me."

He raised his eyebrows and looked around the kitchen as if it was the first time he saw it.

"Angela's old room is just sitting there," I said. "And you can stay here until you get enough money for a place of your own."

He looked at me and blinked.

"That's very generous of you to offer, but I couldn't impose on you like that, Bella. You're a young woman and you don't need an old geezer like me hanging around and, err, what is it you kids call it? Cramping your style?"

I laughed.

"First of all Joe, you could never impose, and I wouldn't have offered if I didn't want you here. Second, you're hardly an old geezer, and third, it's not like I have a lot of style to cramp upon," I said. "Please, say yes."

I could see that he was considering.

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather offer the room to…someone else," he asked delicately.

"No, and you can say his name. Edward didn't want to stay with me, and I just have to deal with that. Please say yes, Joe. I want you to take the job and the room."

He held out his hand and smiled.

"I accept," he said.

I shook his hand and grinned.

"Thank you, Bella. You don't know what this means to me," he said.

I could see that his eyes were getting a little moist and he quickly looked down at his plate and released my hand after giving it a small squeeze. I didn't say anything. If Joe was anything like my father, which I suspected he was, tears were not something that you showed to other people. He cleared his throat and cut into his steak. When he looked up at me again the tears were gone.

"This is delicious," he said and smiled. "Now, we should work out the finer details about this roommate business."

"Ok, like what?" I asked and dug into my plate.

"Well, I'll pay half the rent, of course," he started.

"Not on your life, Joe," I said firmly. "This place is rent-controlled and I can afford it on my own. You need money to save up for your own place and getting your life back. Angela already said that you can have her old bed but that's all the furniture there is for now."

"Ok ok," he said, obviously seeing that it was pointless to argue with me. "But I'll help you with utilities and groceries at least. And I insist on cooking every other night."

"That sounds fair," I said. "Do you want to hear about your job at the library?"

He nodded eagerly.

"Basically you're going to be doing everything that we don't always have time for; putting books back on shelves, scanning new titles into the computer, unpacking new releases, making suggestions if someone is looking for a good book. You've read more than I have, so you're definitely qualified. Sound good?"

"It sounds wonderful, all of it. Thank you so much for this, Bella. I think Edward was right about you. You truly are an angel."

I smiled and lowered my eyes to my plate to hide my tears. I wasn't enough of an angel to save Edward, but at least I was able to help Joe get back on his feet and that would have to be enough.

Angela and Ben helped out with some old furniture that they had in storage and we managed to make a pretty nice room for Joe. He kept shaking his head as if he couldn't believe it and thanked the three of us profusely. I was thrilled that I was able to help him get his life back on track, and I was also thankful for the distraction. Joe was a good man and in a strange way it made me feel a little better about losing Edward. I had gained a friend from the whole experience and I was grateful for that.

On the morning when Joe was starting his new job he made me breakfast and we sat in the kitchen reading our papers.

"This is nice," he said and smiled to me.

"I agree. You're a great roommate, Joe. Are you nervous about starting work today?"

"Yeah, a little," he admitted. "This is a whole new thing for me, but I'm also looking forward to it. I was probably getting a little old for the construction business, and I've always loved books so much. I just never thought it would be possible for me to do something job-wise with it."

"You'll do great," I assured him. "And if you have any questions just come and find me or Mary."

"Who's Mary?" he asked.

"She's my colleague. She's very nice and she showed me the ropes when I first started working there."

"Ok, I'll be sure to do that," he said and returned to his paper.

I smiled into my coffee cup. Mary had already asked about Joe when he had visited me earlier. She tried to sound casual, but she wasn't fooling me. She liked what she saw when she looked at him. When I had suggested hiring Joe for the part- time position, she had agreed immediately and I saw her smiling when she thought I wasn't looking. Mary was only a few years younger than Joe and had been divorced for a while now. I was really looking forward to introducing the two of them. Of course, I knew better than to reveal any of this to Joe. He would most likely get all flustered and nervous, and I decided to act like Mary was just another colleague.

We walked to work together and Mary was already at the front desk, probably waiting for us to arrive. We had about an hour before the library opened, and that was plenty of time to show Joe everything and of course meet Mary.

"Hi Bella," she said with a huge smile as we walked towards her.

I noticed that she had dressed a little nicer than usual, and apparently my instincts were still accurate when it came to other peoples' love life.

"Good morning Mary, this is Joseph Jackson," I said as we stood in front of her.

"You can call me Joe," he said with a smile and held out his hand.

"Oh, do I have to?" she asked. "Joseph is such a lovely name."

"No, not at all. Joseph it is," he said immediately.

She took his hand and shook it.

"It's nice to meet you, Joseph," she said warmly.

"It's very nice to meet you too, Mary," he said.

"Bella tells me that you're living with her," she said.

"Yes, it's just until I get my own place," he said and smiled.

"I'm divorced!" she blurted out. "I mean, um, I live alone but it must be nice to have someone like Bella to spend time with."

"Yes, it took me a while to get used to living alone after my wife passed away. It can get lonely at night," he said.

"I agree, it's nice to spend time with friends or colleagues after work," Mary said and smiled.

They looked at each other and I suddenly had the very distinct feeling that I had just become the third wheel.

"Well, I'm going to go make some coffee," I said. "I'll let you two get acquainted."

They both nodded but neither of them looked at me. I hurried into the small kitchen and laughed my head off after I shut the door.

Mary and Joseph. Talk about a match made in heaven!

I wasn't at all surprised when Joe asked me if it was alright that he didn't make it home for dinner that night. Mary had offered to take him out for a celebratory meal for his first day at his new job. He politely asked if I wanted to join them, but I declined immediately.

As I walked home alone I couldn't help but smile a little for the first time in weeks. The last time I had done this I was making my way home to Edward. I knew that he wasn't there anymore, but at least Joe was happy and he would be home later to tell me about his almost-date with Mary. I picked up the mail and smiled when I saw a letter for Joe, because I knew how much it would mean to him to have genuine proof that he now had a permanent address.

I rifled through the massive amount of junk mail and I discovered a letter from my doctor's office. It was a reminder that it was almost time for my Pap test and that I needed to call and make an appointment.

Damn, already? It feels like I just went for a pelvic exam!

But that was a little more than six months ago, and I had only gone because I wanted to switch my method of birth control from pills to getting a shot because I was a little forgetful once in a while.

Oh, but I still hate that stupid injection. When is it time for that?

Suddenly my blood turned cold. I calculated quickly in my head and realized that it had been well over three months ago since I got my last shot because that was some time before Christmas.

Which means that…Oh shit!

I stumbled a little and dropped the letter as though it had burnt me.

When did I have my last period? God, I can't remember!

I picked up my phone and called Angela. I told her to get here as soon as possible but I wouldn't tell her my concerns over the phone. This was definitely a face-to-face conversation. She arrived soon after, looking frazzled and nervous.

"What is it, Bella? What's wrong? You sounded so weird on the phone. Where's Joe? Is he ok? Is it Edward? Why aren't you saying anything?" she bombarded me with questions.

"Easy, easy," I said. "No one is hurt."

She relaxed, sat down and took the coffee I offered her.

"I think I might be pregnant," I blurted out.

Ok, way to ease her into it there, Bella.

"What?" she asked and narrowed her eyes.

"I, uh, Edward and I…We didn't use a condom last time," I admitted.

"What?!" she said agitatedly. "How could you be so irresponsible, Bella? What about STDs?"

"I've never had unprotected sex with anyone, not even Mike. And Edward, well…he's only slept with two women," I defended.

"I just, I didn't want anything between us," I admitted weakly. "I wanted to feel him, only him.

"Yeah, that's very romantic until you get Chlamydia or something even worse," Angela said sarcastically.

I had to commend Angela for being adamant about always being safe. Although she had been kind of active before she met Ben, she had never had unprotected sex.

"I'm sorry," I said with a sigh. "But can we get back to the whole 'I might be pregnant' conversation?"

"You're not pregnant," she said dismissively. "You're getting that DMPA shot."

Oh, she is gonna kill me for this!! Have mercy!

"I, uh…I forgot to get it," I whispered.

She stared at me and pressed her lips together.

"After everything that happened with Mike and then Edward leaving the first time, it completely slipped my mind," I said, hoping that she wouldn't slap me for being so careless.

"When did you have your period?" she asked, trying to stay calm.

"It's been a while," I said lamely.

"God, you're killing me!" she exclaimed. "You don't remember?"

"It was definitely after I first met Edward," I said, feeling sure about this.

"Yeah, that really doesn't help us any," she said. "Have you had any signs that might indicate that you're pregnant?"
I shook my head.

"No nausea, fatigue or feeling overly emotional?" she questioned.

"Well, I've been emotional but that's because of Edward," I said and felt my eyes well up with tears.

"Bella," she said and stroked my hair. "What a mess."

I nodded and sniffled.

"I guess we should go the drugstore and get one of those pregnancy tests where you can tell early," she said.

I nodded again and wiped my eyes with my sleeve as I stood up to put my coat back on.

"By the way, where's Joe?" she asked as we were driving down the street.

"Oh, he's got a date," I said with a small smile.

"Huh. Well, I guess he couldn't wait around for me any longer," she grinned. "Let me guess, Mary?"

"Yeah, and she calls him Joseph."

Angela threw her head back and laughed.

"That's priceless. Good for them, though."

I agreed completely and gripped Angela's hand in mine as we pulled up to the drugstore.

"Do you want me to get it for you?" Angela asked.

"No, I can do this," I said and exited the car.

After picking up a few pregnancy tests we hurried back to the apartment, and I stood outside the door to the bathroom.

"God, I'm nervous," I told her and looked at the packages in my slightly trembling hand.

"Just do it quickly, and we'll know the answer in a few minutes."

I nodded and entered the bathroom with my pulse thundering loudly in my ears. I put the tests on the edge of the sink after using them and joined Angela in the kitchen.

"Two minutes," I said and swallowed a lump in my throat.

"Bella, what if you are? What are you going to do?" she asked seriously.

"Keep it," I answered immediately.

"Are you sure?" she asked. "And raise it alone? You do have other options, you know."

"No, I don't," I said firmly. "If I'm pregnant I want the baby. That's the only thing I'm completely sure of."

Angela nodded in a resigned manner.

"I know," she said with a small smile. "I figured you might say that."

"How long?" I asked.

"Just a minute now. Whatever happens everything will be ok, Bella. You know that I'll support you one hundred percent."

"I know, and I'm really grateful for that."

The seconds seemed to drag , and finally I couldn't take it anymore and started pacing.

"It's time," Angela said and looked at her watch.

"Oh shit," I whispered and blinked away a few tears.

Angela grabbed my hand and we walked into the bathroom together. On the sink, the answer to the biggest question of my life was waiting. I took a deep breath and picked up the first

test. I stared at the seemingly innocuous looking plastic stick which had suddenly become the center of my life. I read the result and exhaled shakily.

"Well?" Angela asked anxiously.

My eyes welled up with tears and my vision blurred completely.

"P-positive," I stuttered.

She quickly picked up the other two and looked at them.

"These are positive, as well," she said quietly and rubbed my shoulder.

I'm pregnant! I'm gonna have a baby!

"A baby," I whispered and placed my hand on my abdomen. "My baby."

Mine and Edward's.

I felt the tears trickle down my cheeks and I didn't bother wiping them away.

"Are those happy tears?" Angela asked anxiously.

I nodded vigorously but wasn't able to speak because I was overcome with emotion.

I'm going to be a mom. I'll be someone's mommy!

I was so happy that I was almost afraid to say something and break the spell. I had wanted a baby for a long time, and now I was finally pregnant again. I tried to tell myself that I shouldn't start making plans just yet, that I should be cautiously happy because I could still miscarry as I had before, but my joy wouldn't be contained.

"I'm having a baby," I croaked out to Angela.

She smiled widely and gave me a hug.

"I'll help you, Bella. You won't do this alone," she promised and hugged me tighter.

We walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. Angela was watching me closely and I could see that there was something she wanted to say.
"You're going to ask me about Edward, aren't you?"

"Yes," she said and paused for a few seconds. "Are you planning on telling him?"

I thought about it and I hated to admit that I felt a torn about sharing the news with him.

"He's the father and he has a right to know," I started.

"But," Angela hedged.

"But…I don't want Edward to come back because I'm pregnant. Right now he's so lost and this might only make things worse for him. I want him to come back to me because he really wants to, not because he feels obligated."

Angela nodded and looked pensive.

"If he decides to stay after I tell him, I'll never know if he really wants me or if it's just because he feels that it's the right thing to do. And what if he feels like I'm forcing him to stay and then he leaves again when it becomes too much for him? What if I have this baby and he suddenly decides that he belongs out there? I can't have him leave me and the baby, especially if our child gets attached to him."

I sighed heavily.

"I do want him to know his baby, but because of his situation it's not like I can do a shared custody thing with him. There are so many unknown factors with Edward, and I don't know if I can trust him not to leave again. I can't be a family with him and then risk that he abandons us. I can't depend on him as things are now. I have to depend on myself for the baby's sake. I have to be the constant in my child's life and I can't let Edward affect my judgment anymore. I can't risk getting depressed like before if he leaves again. I'll have someone who depends on me entirely for everything."

Angela looked at me and mulled over my speech.

"It sounds like you've made up your mind," she said softly and took my hand.

"It isn't right. Edward should know about this, and I would love to raise our child together…But I can't be selfish now. I have to do what's best for the baby, and I don't know if Edward knowing qualifies as the best. A baby needs consistency and parents that are dependable and trustworthy, and I'm not sure if Edward can be any of those things."

I buried my face in my hands and started to cry. Angela rubbed my back soothingly.

"God, this is so messed up," I sobbed. "In a perfect world, Edward and I would be together and have this baby. I love him, Angela. I tried not to, but I still do."

"I know, I know," she said softly and stroked my hair.

"I don't know that to do. I feel rotten about keeping this from him, but I can't trust that he'll stay with us if I tell him. If I told him and he decided not to be a part of it immediately, it would hurt me but then at least I would know. But what if he leaves while I'm at the end of the pregnancy, or worse, after the baby is born? I couldn't handle that. I hate to say it, but the way things are now I only know Edward as someone who leaves."

"You don't have to decide anything right now, honey," Angela said. "You just found out and you should be happy and not worry too much. It can't be good for the baby. You can take a little time and think things over."

I nodded and took a couple of deep breaths. My friend was right. I had time and I needed to remember that this was a good thing. I wanted this baby so much and I could make a decision later.

"Ok," Angela said determinedly. "What can I do right now?"

"Um, I need some pre-natal vitamins and I should probably get some books and stuff on being pregnant. I know that there are some things that I need to avoid, but I can hardly remember. I have to get a doctor's appointment, as well. But that can all wait until tomorrow."

"Ok, but right now we need to fix you some dinner," she said with a smile.

I started to get up but Angela protested.

"I'm making dinner," she said. "You sit here and relax with some TV or something."

"Ok," I said and leaned against the cushions as she walked into the kitchen.

I turned on the TV but I couldn't really focus on it. I put my hand on my flat stomach and tried to envision it with a bump.

"We are going to be ok, little one," I said quietly. "I love you so much already, and I wish I could give you the perfect family. Maybe someday I will be able to."

I wiped away a tear and took a deep breath.

"In the meantime, we have Aunt Angela, Uncle Ben and Joe to be there for us. And Grandma Renee and Phil, and Grandpa Charlie are going to spoil you rotten. Everyone will love you so much. Please grow big and strong, and I'll take care of everything out here. Ok, baby?"

I rubbed my stomach and smiled. We would be ok. I just hoped that Edward was alright wherever he was and that he was taking care of himself out there on the streets. He had left me with a parting gift far more valuable than his dog tag this time, and for that I would always love him.

Yay! A baby!

Ok, I know that a few of you were very much against her getting pregnant, and one reviewer even said that she would stop reading entirely, if Bella has a baby. I'm sorry that you feel that way, but I have left it up to the readers and let you decide. This is what the majority wanted and so you shall have it. :)

Should Edward know about the baby? YES!!! (Right? I assume that everyone agrees with this?)

How is our handsome Homelessward doing without his Bella? What will Joe say and will he kick Edward's ass for abandoning Bella after having slept with her?

By the way, there's a Blizzard thread on Twilighted(dot)net where I'll be posting teasers and answering questions. You can find it under the All Human fics and I'll put the link on my profile page.