Disclaimer: I own nothing, as per usual.

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Part 10

He fought along brave men. Men who were willing to trade anything for a taste of glory and a chance to live to fight another day. He was not like them. He may have been there in the front lines, but he had magic on his side. A never ending force that could decide wars between kingdoms. Witnessing the worst and absolute horror on his comrades' faces is not something he is able to suppress from his mind's eye.

Still among all that chaos he never felt out of place and so lost in the moment as he did when Morgana lay in the bed with her back turned to him. What was meant to finally put his mind to rest, had him in knots of what to do. Not doing anything and following her lead is what brought him here and now that he is left to his own devices he is at loss.

Looking back to the candle and her soft glow that spread through the chambers, he realized that maybe pretending that there was nothing unusual about this whole situation was a way to go. Hiding in plain sight one would say.

As his eyes glowed to match the dying light of candles, he turned and slowly walked to the bed. Slowly, as if the slightest move will have her changing her mind and him spending the night on the cold floor, he laid on his back above the covers. Stiff and uncomfortable would be a one way to explain it. He felt that he was more at peace on the caves floor where he spent his past decades.

"Really, Merlin, if I had put a puppet next to me, it would feel more comfortable than you are now," she said as if he didn't already know.

"I am just getting used to having someone around me. I don't remember the last time I had an opportunity to share my resting place-" he said "not without someone trying to use it for their vile plans to torment me further."

Feeling the bed move and her turning on her back with her eyes regarding him with a still calmness and understanding, he felt that maybe that wasn't the real reason he felt so out of place.

"There is no need for it, just close your eyes and try to relax, sleep should come easily."

He closed his eyes, still feeling restless; despite the exhaustion the feeling of her still watching him had his nerve endings on fire. It really wasn't normal, this need to be close to her. The need to look her in the eyes and be reassured that he was in fact out of the caves and moving forward was overwhelming and he complied with it.

Opening his eyes to meet hers, he saw the relaxed and almost dazed look in her eyes. It seemed that the day was catching up with her too. And so in that moment he felt himself relax. Just being with her and looking at her had him calm down and feeling like this was where he was supposed to be. That no matter what the future might bring this moment will keep him going.

"I think that I handled myself admirably after a day I had. Found out about magic and found you, Merlin. Forgive me if it leaves me a bit exhausted, but I do consider that a full day's work."

A soft smile that stretched on her face had him thinking that she never looked more beautiful. Tired, hair all over the pillow, tucked under the blanket and to him, she was exquisite. It just made him appreciate more the here and now and it made him smile that he could share this with her.

"That is true and the way you handled the clot pole- I mean prince was nothing short of spectacular Morgana. You keep surprising me every step of the way. With you everything seems- less."

Her face reflected mirth and he knew she was surprised by his open praise of her actions.

"Don't let it get to your head though," he said with a small smile "I am sure you turned many heads in Camelot with your actions. Don't want to be just one among others who were there to compliment you on it."

Her face couldn't conceal her delight at his opinion of her. Matching his smile, she said "It wouldn't be fair, would it Merlin? I being brilliant and you rendered to a servant status by Arthur."

The mischief was there and he couldn't help but be caught in it.

"Don't remind me of the royal prat. If I was in better shape I would have nailed his ears to a wall and made him sing like a girl."

Deciding that he can afford to let go for a bit, he frowned and continued.

"The warlock that has faced many battles, to end up being a servant for an arrogant prince is really not something I take lightly. Maybe I should teach him a lesson in manners."

With that, her face sobered and he quickly pulled a smile to correct himself.

"I was only joking; his royal ears and ass will still be attached to him, unfortunately." he said observing her now serious features. "Where did the trust go?"

He could almost feel her let out a breath which was followed by relief and a laugh. The one he couldn't help but want to hear more.

"I know you may not believe it, but Arthur is a good man. Acting like a prat is his only refuge among the men of court, as they are all too dumb to be anything else. Merlin, please be patient with him when you do get a chance to talk."

Seeing that this had hit a nerve he decided that he needed to reassure her that he really had no intentions of harming Arthur in any way. Well, except make him sing like a girl. He had that one coming.

"There's no need to worry Morgana. I gave you my word that I will respect your decisions in whatever capacity I can. But, as you said he is a prat, no doubt about that."

A grateful nod that followed made him feel relived for some reason. He really shouldn't make himself so dependent on her opinion, but he couldn't help it.

"Merlin-"

"Hm?"

"Can you tell me something more about the time you lived in?"

As he saw her bury herself further in the pillow, he knew he would tell her anything she wished to hear. The sleep that seemed to dance behind her eyes gave her a serene look and he saw that she didn't mean anything specific.

He started to tell her about the age where anyone could live as free and open from any kind of law. Told her about how people loved to travel and explore. How when he could find the time, he would go from village to village collecting knowledge from various people who were offering their time. That he was young and eager for an adventure, but also believed in a value of honest work. Sometimes he would pass an entire day working the field with his mother, or helping her saddle the horses.

These memories held no pain, no darkness for him to sink into. These memories held joy and happiness which he hadn't felt in such a long time. Even now, the thought of his mother saddens him, because she also saw the vile and evil men trying to take everything from humble people, who were just trying to survive.

When he looked back towards Morgana, being dragged away in his memories had him oblivious for a few moments and he saw that she had fallen asleep. It really was an odd day; he couldn't have imagined that he would finally be free of that place. Maybe with her help he could also be free of the darkness that seems to sap away every bit of strength he had. The need the control the darkness within him was getting stronger, because he never wanted her to see him like the monster he left in that cave.

But still there are things that couldn't be ignored. He needed to face Uther and show that it was time for a change. The one Uther wasn't prepared for. No matter what he will make him see that it was going to happen with him on the throne or him in the ground for he has waited enough and his kind has suffered enough.

Looking over Morgana and her relaxed expression he knew that he needed to make this world better, not for him, but for her and his kind. Give the opportunity for people to get to know each other without the law commanding you to mask who you are. Also, if what the great dragon said was the truth than he could have an ally in Arthur. Only time will tell, but for the next days he needs to lie low and wait for his moment to strike.

Perhaps there is another way out of all this bloodshed, with Arthur by his side maybe they could make Albion shine like never before. The future doesn't have to be so bleak and history doesn't need to remember you through tragedy. Morgana stirs and continues to sleep and he feels the drowsiness claiming him. After all, it can be him and her that bring to the people what they lost so long ago. Hope.

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