Disclaimer: Touhou belongs to Zun, and the only things that belong to myself would be Usagi the mimic, and Moegi the japanese beetle. Everything else belongs to their rightful owner.
A/N: Getting close to the end of sorts, but still not quite there.
K/N: Sorry for boring you! Shall I go back in time and make myself be more interesting?
A/N: ...But you aren't that boring, nor did I ever call you boring...
K/N: Ohh. My mistake, in that case.
A/N: All I said that I would rather continue my other works. You stretched that pretty far.
K/N: Aha!
A/N: W-what...?
K/N: If you would rather write another story, the other must be more interesting! Ergo, that means my life's story must bore you!
A/N: Still not seeing the connection... Part of the reason is a lack of Cirno! She's in almost every other one of my stories, but not this one!
K/N: I relent, I relent... You obviously just won't see reason...
A/N: If that makes you happy. Really, I just think your logic is silly. Anyways, silly logic aside, how about we get on with the show?
I hummed as I finished sweeping the grounds I forgot would have nobody to keep them, after I went back in time. Of course, the goddesses were a tad suspicious of me doing as such, but they couldn't exactly afford to turn me down, now that I was gone. As I worked, I wore one of my old, old, old shrine maiden outfits, which could also be called Sanae's, as I worked around the courtyard. As I swept, the snake that Sanae kept in her hair long ago watched me. She always could tell that I was her master, so with my other self gone I was all she had left to watch when she was bored. As I swept, it became apparent that the chest was a little tighter than once it was, what with my breasts having grown just a tad over the centuries, but at least the outfit still fit, if only barely.
Inside, I had Ran prepare Suwako and us a nice little dinner; I would say both goddesses, but Kanako would be quite unable to do such a thing. Not having a mouth to eat with does make such a thing quite the issue, you see. Although, now that they have a full-time shrine maiden, faith is already starting to return to the shrine. For now it is but a trickle, but soon enough we will have Kanako back on her ethereal feet! Perhaps those feet will even take on a physical form once again some day! I can only hope so.
When done sweeping, I set the bamboo broom against the side of the shrine, and headed in to check on Ran. When I found her in the kitchen, as one would expect, I asked, "So, how are things going, Ran?" It feels oddly nice to work hard to keep the shrine clean. Takes me back to my youth...
Peering at me from over her shoulder, Ran replied, "It is going as well as it should, Master. No better, no worse."
Chuckling, I said, "I see. Well, keep up the wonderful work, Ran. I'm going to get some reading in before dinner."
Not giving her a chance to reply, I fell into a gap, and landed on my bed. Not long later, I began to read.
Today, I met a funny little knight. He goes by the name of Jack King, and knew something was strange about me at a single glance. It was amusing to see such a noble person act quite as silly as he. If he wasn't wearing the clothes one would expect of a knight, I would mistake him for the jester for the fool of a king this place has. But when the king is a fool, one truly should expect him to have a jester for a knight. Sadly, he doesn't seem to appreciate quality pranks, and promises harsh punishment to the perpetrator.
As we chatted over tea, which I seemed to have yet again show to be quite good with ground sugar in it, I learned of the numerous pranks he had pulled. One time, he even replaced the salt with a nasty little magical itching powder he bought from a traveling wizard. Needless to say, the king was not pleased at the outbreak of ticklish throats at his feast. We both shared a laugh at the expense of the poor nobles.
I asked him why he would tell me such stories, and he simply told me that a prank isn't nearly as good if it goes unappreciated. Truly, he has a bit of wisdom within him, to think as such. After all, what is a show when none who witness it enjoy it? Although, I do believe he was trying to court me. I have blossomed into quite the looker I have been told. Perhaps that was what he was referring to when he said I was special? Although, even if he was referring to my youkai heritage, I still would take it as a compliment. It is not common that westerners recognize one for being a youkai. All of their monsters live much like savage tribes men, and are quite easy to see when you meet one.
I smiled a bit at the tale of long ago, but the smile took on a sad light when I turned the page.
Jack's dead. Up an beheaded for a prank, he was. Now he terrorizes the lands as a vengeful dullahan, causing mischief wherever he goes. It took a great deal of effort to calm him down, as he ran about on his horse. He loved that horse, and they killed her along with him, although they used a mace on her. When I finally calmed him down, he asked why it was so much easier to breathe. Why he could see so clearly now. Everything was sharp to him now. You would think it would be difficult to see without a head, but he seems none the wiser. As revenge, we planned quite the prank involving an old shoe, 40 eggs, a single nail, a broken hammer, and a noose. Honestly, the prank was a work of genius, but old Jack would have none of that. He claimed it was all in a day's work.
For now he is staying at my place, and I'll begin looking for his missing head starting tomorrow. It can't be too hard to find, right?
From a gap that opened beside my bed, Ran said, "Master, it is time for dinner. Wash up, and the three of us will await your arrival." As quickly as it had opened, the gap snapped shut.
Chuckling a bit at the fox who took a page from my book in a figurative sense, I set my non-figurative book down and opened a gap below myself, allowing me to head for the bathroom of the shrine, where I carefully began to wash my hand. After a moment under the scalding hot water, I turned off the valve to the hot side, and wiped my hands on the towel. With that done, I made my way to the table.