I looked up at Loki as his cold stare pierced through me more so than normal. I turned from him and looked at the bottom of the door. It had some very intricate designs that I had never noticed. I focused on it trying to keep my mind from bursting. I felt my magic start to prickle as the silence drew on and on. However I started to feel his magic push back on me. Not in a bad way but in an almost calming way. It felt as if soft waves of ocean current were gently hitting me and soothing me. Was Loki really doing this to me?

"You shouldn't be in here My Prince. It is very suspicious for a Prince to enter a young unwed maidens room. People will speak ill of me and ruin my-"

"Oh shut it," I flinched at his harsh words but remained still. I heard him take a step toward me and I pulled myself into a tighter ball. My hand would start to leave handprints on my arm if I held any tighter. Then my lie from a few seconds ago would seem more plausible. Though I doubt he let anyone see him come in here. He could turn invisible.

"Why." My voice was much meeker then it was a mew moments ago. I hated that it sounded that way. I cleared my throat trying to gain some strength. It wasn't really a question but more of a statement. Why did he disagree. He didn't respond for a few moments and for some odd reason this worried me. Was he coming up with a lie to make me feel better? He was the greatest trickster.

"I have zero feelings for her and I would never wed someone like her," His voice was rough but not uncaring. He was trying really hard to make me feel better. He was putting forth some effort into how I was feeling. I turned and looked at his dark figure. He wasn't looking at me. His eyes feel on Vel who was on the floor sleeping peacefully. I looked at her and watched as her back rose and fell as she lightly snored. By now I felt engulfed by his magic. I turned my attention back to Loki and watched his calm face. I felt a small ache in my chest at the thought of Lagina marrying him after the dreams I had had. "You are being very selfish you know that right? Well so am I, but I am always selfish." My brow furrowed and I turned away once more.

"What do you mean I'm being selfish? I'm willing to give up my own feelings so that my own sister could be happy. She is older than me and therefore has the birthright to a Prince. I am doing the correct thing by backing off so…" I stopped myself as I felt myself getting worked up again. My magic had even started to push back at his, pushing it away from me. I liked feeling his magic. Slowly it creeped its way around me once more.

"Did you even think about how I might feel about this situation?" I wasn't the only one losing my cool now. His magic fringed and I shuttered against it. I glanced at him over my shoulder as his arms were extended being very dramatic. "Do I not also get a say in who I might or might not wed?" That cut deep into me, for reason I couldn't' place.

"Well I, I mean,"

"No. You are horrible at lying and whatever you were trying to say was nothing but that. How about you be honest with yourself before you try being honest with anyone else." Be honest with myself? How wasn't I being honest? Everything that I did was honest and what should happen.

"Leave," I said it softly. I didn't want him near me. Well that wasn't completely true. I wanted him much much closer but I couldn't handle him and everything else at the moment.

"What was that?" He tilted his head ever so slightly as if I had misspoken.

"I. Said. Leave." I didn't look at him as I made sure he was able to hear me this time. I heard him give an annoyed sigh and turn. He opened the door and slammed it causing a pot to fall off a table and shatter. I shuttered at both actions. Standing in the darkness, I tried to keep myself together. It was quite, cold, and lonely now that Loki had left. I bit my lip and held myself tighter. I was pushing him away. I didn't want to but it was the right thing to do. In the grand scheme. I was raised to put my sisters before me and that is what I should be doing. Lagina was set to be his bride and it wasn't my place to change or to stop that. She deserved so much.

My magic pulsed around me as my mood fell deeper into a pit that I felt as though I would never be able to climb out of. This was so petty of me. First love was always the hardest, or so Teca had told me. She had fallen in love with a King who had chosen someone else to be his bride. She had broken into the pieces even though she had only known him for a week. She had told us that it was like someone had ripped out her still beating heart and shredded it. I was baffled at the time by all her words. For a week after this she would mope in her room and be so quiet when with father. She even managed to make herself sick from all her crying, but in the end she was fine. After another week she was back to normal as if nothing had ever happened. Look at her now. You would have never thought she had acted that way over a man.

I could do the same. I could break away from this and deal with the agonizing pain that would follow. The dresser was shoved from the wall and it fell rather loudly as things on top it fell off broke. I stared down at the floor as a small stream of blood dripped from my leg. Something had cut me. I made no motion to stop it as it slide down. I walked over to my by bed and crawled into it and hid almost my entire body under the large comforter. Tears slowly start to slide down my cheeks and started to stain the pillow that I laid on. Vel got on the bed and looked at me with a sad expression. I watched her as I cried. She nuzzled my cheek and looked me over again. I made no move to get out of bed. Giving up, she curled into a ball and started to go back to sleep, with her body pressed up against me.

I knew I could give up on my happiness. Even if it killed me.

[[PLEASE DON'T BE MAD AT ME. /hides. I will never abandon this story. I promise. This had been sitting in my docs for awhile and I thought as a sign of good faith. I would make yall hate me for giving you a taste while I write the real next chapter. I love all of you dearly and I read all your comments like a million times because they bring me so much joy. My life gets really busy but I will make sure you get a new chapter soon (I don't know how soon but sooner than this one.) Please comment and yell at me to hurry the fuck up!]]