AN: Heavy citrus in this one. You've been warned.
xxxxx
11
xxxxx
"Eh?" Hinata blinked up at her boyfriend, taking in the serious gleam in his dark eyes, the firm set of his lips and jaw. He looked completely different from just a few minutes ago. Before, he had looked awkward and uncomfortable, now he looked determined and focused.
He was so confusing to her at times; she didn't get his thought processes at all. Maybe he didn't always understand his thought processes; he was usually in a constant state of confusion. She watched as the corners of his lips twitched upward, amused at her wide eyed response.
"Stay with me tonight." He repeated and when she turned a few shades of red he frowned for a moment, not understanding, before he blinked. Then his face began to heat and he looked away but did not release his hold on her. Interesting, he had been weird about that just a minute ago. "Not...not like that." He muttered. "Just..." Now he looked uncomfortable and shifted.
"Hinata..." Sasuke looked at a complete loss as to what he wanted to say. No, that wasn't it...he seemed to know what he wanted to say, he simply was too embarrassed to say it.
You don't have to push yourself. She thought; finally understanding. Her smile was warm "Sasuke-kun, you don't have to –"
"Tell me what I have to do to keep you." He blurted out and white eyes blinked up at him again.
"Eh?" although she was still confused, her face began to burn even more at the blunt statement. "What...I don't..." What was he saying that for all of a sudden?
"Look I just..." he scowled at her, as if she was the one at fault for his frustration for not being psychic and making him say the words aloud. "I don't...have anyone else. I know I'm not nice or cheerful or romantic. I don't even know why you like me; I've never been nice to you.
"You're not just the first girl I've ever liked; you're..." he hesitated, looking uncomfortable before steeling himself. "You're the first person I've let get this close to me since the massacre. Not Naruto, not Sakura, not Kakashi, you. I left them, but if I had felt the way I do about you then that I do now..."
Hinata's eyes widened as she realized what it was he was trying to tell her. Her lips parted as she tried to keep herself from reacting too strongly as her heart was pounding in her chest. Tears stung behind her eyes and she fought to cover her mouth with her hands. "Sasuke..."
His hand lightly gripped the back of her neck and he pressed their foreheads together. It was slight, but his breaths were shaky. "I don't know if I love you. I don't know what it is I feel. In the end, whether I want it or not doesn't matter; I can't...lose you. So tell me what I have to do, because I don't want to chase you away."
There was some confusion, because his tone implied that he had done so before and she certainly couldn't recall a time when he had. Maybe he referring to his actions the past six months? Regardless, she felt a myriad of emotions at the confession. She couldn't really explain what it was between them; it confused her to no end as well. Right now, however, she knew exactly what and how she felt about him.
Shaking her head she cupped his cheek with her hand, still fighting back tears. He was so many things, almost all of them were negative, but he wasn't an evil person. Angry, bitter, depressed even; but not evil. She couldn't even imagine the pain he had suffered nor could she imagine how he must feel about wanting to have someone in his life again after years of keeping people away.
It was obvious that he was afraid; most of his actions concerning the beginning of their relationship had been either from confusion or fear that she would fall into the arms of another. His jealousy was from insecurity – Hinata was one of the few girls, if not only – who had never held feelings for him. His confidence in being able to keep her wasn't high as it would have been with any other female.
It had taken a few days, but Hinata understood that his reluctance concerning his feelings and their relationship was because he was afraid of losing someone he cared about again. This admission cemented that; which meant that his feelings were genuine. He didn't want them because he didn't want to go through that pain again. Who would? She wasn't entirely sure what had brought the confession on but she knew what she needed to do.
"You don't have to do anything." She said softly, glad she was already blushing as her thumb moved along his cheek. "You're also...the first person I've let into my heart since Naruto-kun. You're not very nice," he frowned slightly at that but remained silent. "but there are things about you...and those things are why I'm here. So, it's okay.
"You don't have to worry; I won't leave you unless you really want me to go. I said that I'd be with you and you're the first...so..." she looked down "W-what I'm trying to say is t-that I...I care about you a lot. You won't ever have to worry about me leaving you for another guy..." she looked at him. "I...chose you. S-so..."
She was cut off when he closed the distance between their lips and she sighed, melting into his embrace as he pulled her tight against him. She easily parted for him but his kiss was slow, as if he had all the time in the world. Wrapping her arms around him, she returned his affection with equal intensity. He made a muffled sound and then warmth filled her as his arms practically wrapped around her body and he leaned more into the kiss.
How long they were like that she had no idea, all she knew was that he felt wonderful to her. He was warm and his lips were soft, his tongue almost teasing. No one had ever held her as close as he was right now and she felt safe. It was a crazy thought but she actually felt safe in the arms of Uchiha Sasuke.
"Hinata." It was whispered against her lips as they parted, panting lightly. His hands were framing her face, dark eyes hooded as he took her in. His pale face was lightly tinted with red and then he leaned in again, this kiss a bit more heated.
It wasn't until there was the sound of something sizzling that the two teens broke apart. Turning, Hinata let out a soft cry when one of the pots began to boil over, scurrying about to find a dish cloth and mitts to move it. Even through her mild panic over their dinner she was thinking about what had just transpired between them.
She had honestly been worried about things because he had seemed so upset over having the feelings to begin with. He had just 'given in' and that was a horrible way to begin a relationship, yet she had agreed anyway, for two reasons. One, if she had rejected him it would have seriously hurt and that wasn't something she had wanted to do – even if it wasn't a good reason to be with someone. Two, she had hoped that maybe things would change. Also foolish, but she had refused to believe that he was simply incapable of truly feeling something for someone.
The Hyuuga was very glad she had gone with her feelings. It would take time; Sasuke wasn't as strong as he portrayed himself to be when it came to certain things. Because of his past he would probably still continue to be insecure and jealous over any guy who gave her attention. He would probably fret over her more than necessary because his fear and complex was very real and very serious. He would break if he lost the last and only person he cared about, they both knew that.
It was going to be a long and hard road, Hinata understood this. It would probably take him years before he would feel comfortable and secure about her being a constant in his life; if he ever truly did. He would have to work hard, just as she would have to work hard to show him that she wasn't going anywhere under any circumstances.
And besides Naruto-kun and some of the elders, everyone else will be against us. Which would help not at all.
But she didn't regret her decision, especially not now. He was willing to change and do whatever necessary to make them work; that was enough for her.
"Oh, good, everything is fine." She observed, pleased. Feeling much better than she had in a while, she turned to Sasuke and started. He was staring at her, but it was the look he was giving her that made her pause. The Uchiha blinked and it was gone but her feelings deepened just a bit more at the display.
He really does want to be with me...it's just going to take time. She was patient and while she never thought she would feel this way, it was worth it.
"Sorry." It wasn't a genuine apology and she giggled, turning back to dinner. If he kept distracting her dinner really would go up in smoke.
"Um, as for staying," she began, peeking at the oven, pleased to see that her special dish she had made for him was almost done. "I um, Naruto-kun has me officially listed as being on mission for the next three days so I um...w-well I was going to m-maybe stay with someone else but we had figured that m-maybe the days would help us um, get to know each other a little better..."
"Three days?" when she looked at him he seemed thoughtful. "Stay here then. I'll sleep on the couch or whatever and..." he cut himself off, thinking better of what he had planned on saying. "If you want, anyway."
"Okay." She flashed him a small smile as the timer for the oven went off. She could still feel his eyes on her back as she pulled out the dish and began to set everything up for the table. She had made onigiri, miso soup, tempura vegetables, and then the specialty dish.
"What is that?" he asked and she jumped, surprised at how he had snuck up behind her. He was actually very close, she could feel the heat of his body and his face was close to hers as he peeked over her shoulder. Pointing to the dish he turned his head slightly to her before looking back down abruptly, his face heating again.
He was so...cute. She never thought she would associate Sasuke with 'cute' but his awkwardness around her was so normal and boyish she couldn't help herself. It also warmed her heart, because Sasuke needed a normal life. Happiness had been ripped from him at a tender age and it made her feel good that she could do something so simple and yet so significant for him.
After years of pain, he deserved some happiness, some normalcy.
"It's scalloped tomatoes." She explained and giggled at the small noise he made. He really did love tomatoes. "It's hard to tell because of the bread crumbs b-but when I saw the recipe I thought maybe..." now she felt a little shy. It couldn't be helped, he was her first boyfriend and their relationship had only just begun. "S-since it's your first night, um, being out of the house for good I thought maybe w-we could celebrate..."
"Hn." He pulled back and began to grab the box of onigiri to take to the 'dining room', which was little more than a table in open space. "I like your cooking." She didn't see his face as he walked away but she had a feeling he was probably embarrassed.
He really was trying; it gave her a lot of hope.
Sasuke helped her set up the table and bring the food out. They didn't speak but the silence was very comfortable. He absolutely refused to look at her as he ate but considering how he had ended up practically eating the entire tomato dish by himself – she wasn't a huge fan of tomatoes like he was – it was a safe bet that he had liked it.
While she cleaned up he went to go take a shower and Hinata went through her mind what they would do for three days. She was positive he wouldn't try anything – not without her permission, anyway – and she felt safe around him so staying was fine. She wouldn't take his bed, however, that was just rude.
Hinata decided not to tell him that after this she would actually be heading off on a B ranked mission for two weeks; he probably wouldn't take well to the news. It wouldn't be a difficult mission but that wouldn't matter to Sasuke, her being out where she could be hurt would be enough to upset him.
She sighed, although there was a smile on her face. It would be a long road indeed.
By the time she had finished he was out of the shower. He was wearing a black shirt and matching drawstring pants, thick hair still damp. Hinata wondered briefly if the reason his hair looked the way it did was because it had never seen a blow dryer before and she began to giggle loudly at the image.
"What's so funny?" he was giving her a look that clearly expressed he had no idea what her problem was, which only made her giggle more. When no answer was forthcoming he shook his head and headed for the couch. "Girls are weird." He muttered to himself as he flopped down, stretching out and putting his arm over his eyes.
"Oh, are you going to sleep?" she began to walk over.
"Yeah. I haven't slept on the bed yet so I can't tell you if it's comfortable or not but..."
She began to panic, shaking her head. "N-no I can't..." he raised his arm to regard her blandly. "It's your apartment, I can't just..."
"Yeah, and you're my girlfriend," he reminded her "I'd be kind of a jerk if I made you sleep on the couch while I took the bed." Then, as if he realized what he had just said, he turned over on his side to hide his embarrassment at openly acknowledging their relationship. "Just take the bed."
"But...it's not right..." she looked down at her feet, upset. She really didn't want to deprive the owner of their home of their bed; it just felt wrong to her.
"Are you serious?" he sat up, clearly confused. "I thought girls expected us to give up the bed while we take the couch. It's like some sort of unspoken rule or whatever." A pause. "Never mind, I keep forgetting you're not like other girls." He shook his head, as if he couldn't believe her antics, and stood.
Her nose scrunched up a bit, a little offended. "W-well...I might not be like other girls but –"
"I didn't say it was a bad thing." He closed the distance and lightly grabbed her wrist. "C'mon." He began to guide her to the bedroom and confusion crossed her features.
"Um, Sasuke-kun...what –"
"Compromise." He said flatly. With one fluid motion she was suddenly up in his arms and she let out a squeak, wrapping her arms around his neck. He then unceremoniously dumped her on the bed and she let out another undignified squeak while he crawled on behind her. A strong arm wrapped around her waist before she could recover and warmth washed over her back as he pulled her close.
When he yawned Hinata realized he was genuinely tired. She wondered when the last time he had slept; he didn't seem like the sort of person to get tired easily.
"Go to sleep." He murmured drowsily and yawned again. "We're going out tomorrow night."
Squirming, she tried to get away – this was incredibly embarrassing – but he refused to let her go. "W-we are?" she continued to squirm until it dawned on her that he wasn't going to answer her. When she was able to turn a bit to look at him she realized why.
He was fast asleep.
It was then that Hinata noticed the slight rings underneath his eyes. He actually looked peaceful, lips slightly parted as he breathed evenly. She stared at him for a long time, smiling to herself. He obviously felt very relaxed to fall asleep so easily, although she was sure being full on such a large meal helped. He had eaten quite a lot; the tomato dish alone had been enough to feed six people.
So she settled down, interlacing her fingers with the hand draped over her and closed her eyes. She actually wasn't tired, but that was alright. Eventually she did fall asleep, hopeful, positive, and happy.
xxxxx
It was unbearably hot in the room and he panted as his hands slid up her body. She squirmed, causing her ass to rub against his thickening erection and earning her a low moan. He moved his hips, kissing her neck as he cupped her breasts, rolling the sensitive buds of her nipples between his fingers. She whispered his name and one hand slid down to her stomach, pulling her against him as they rocked together.
"Hina..." he whispered the name in her ear as his hand moved further down, fingers sliding between slick folds. She arched her back, her hand reaching behind her to grip short black locks. He trailed his tongue up her neck and along the shell of her ear. "Spread your legs for me, Hina."
She did and he slid inside of her, a hard groan escaping. It felt as amazing as he thought it would. Gripping her thigh he moved, thrusting hard and deep, loving the way she would moan his name. She met his thrusts as he sucked on her neck, fingers digging into skin.
"You're mine, Hinata." He said hotly against her skin and she shivered. Sweat covered their bodies but he could care less, not with how good he felt being inside of her. "I'm never letting you go."
"Sasuke," she said breathlessly and he increased the tempo as if felt himself climbing higher. Oh yes, he was almost there. He couldn't believe how good she felt, he couldn't get enough.
Arm wrapping around her, he jerked his hips, moving as hard as he could inside of her, his head tipping back as he quickly began to reach his peak. "Hina," teeth nipped at her neck as he felt that familiar tensing. Just a bit more. "Yes," it was a low moan "Yes, I'm almost there, baby; you feel incredible."
She tugged hard on his hair and he grunted, biting down hard on her shoulder as the tension hit its peak. "Fuck, Hinata I'm –" lips parted and his eyes closed right as he reached the edge...
His eyes snapped open as he jerked awake; panting, sweaty, and with the hard-on from hell.
You've...got to be kidding me. He hated those damn dreams, they always felt so good and then right when he would reach his limit he'd wake up or it'd switch to a nightmare. He should have realized it immediately; he only talked crazy like that when he was dreaming.
Well, at least they weren't every night like they had been before he had first kissed her when he'd had that panic attack. His feelings of homicide had been genuine at the time; he had been confused and frustrated in more ways than one.
It was still dark in the room but he could tell that it was early morning. Closing his eyes he sighed. Well, at least he had gotten more hours of sleep than normal. He had been so completely exhausted after his shower it hadn't even been remotely amusing.
Man, it's really hot. Why did he feel so much warmer than normal?
"...suke..."
Dark eyes flew open as his mind fought through his grogginess. That voice had been distinctively female and...did it just moan?
"Sasuke..."
Every muscle in his body became rigid when he realized three things. One, Hinata was lying in the bed with him in the exact same position she had been in his dream, except she was clothed. Two, her face was flushed and she was very obviously moaning in her sleep which looked...really hot in his current state of mind. Three, she was probably doing that because his hand was underneath her jacket and had a surprisingly firm grip on a full breast.
How he hadn't noticed that upon waking was beyond him but since his hand was already there he squeezed gently, earning him another little moan. She squirmed and just like in the dream her ass rubbed against him. He let out a low noise, resisting the urge to move his hips against her to relieve some of the tension.
Had this been a few years ago he would have gotten up and practically ran away, horribly embarrassed and feeling like a pervert. However, he was no longer twelve. He was eighteen, hormonal, very aroused, with his very hot girlfriend making all sorts of wonderful noises because he was – basically – feeling up on her very ample breast. Top it off with the steamy dream he had just had and all logical thought was cheerfully tossed aside in his lust-filled haze.
Propping himself up enough so he could look down at her face, dark eyes heated with desire watched as she panted and moaned under his touch. He was gentle, not wanting to wake her and break the spell. His hand squeezed as his fingers rolled a hardened bud through her mesh shirt. Like her his lips were parted, breaths a little ragged.
She whispered his name and it sounded nothing like it had in his dream; the real thing was much better. Hinata was breathtaking and he marveled at how he was making her move and squirm and say his name. Although he wanted to do nothing more than to bury himself deep inside of her like he had in his dream, bringing her pleasure was bringing him pleasure and it fed his attention starved ego when it came to her.
Leaning forward, he brushed his lips along her cheek and trailed his tongue along the shell of her ear. How far could he take this? She looked so good but something about waking her didn't appeal to him. He smirked as it hit him that she actually wanted him sexually; it was an incredible high and it became a challenge.
"Mm," he purred against her ear, pressing as close as he dared, his hips moving instinctively against her. "You're beautiful, Hinata." She whimpered in response and he kissed along her exposed neck. Satisfied that she was responding to his voice he became bolder. "Say my name, I want to hear it."
Sasuke licked his lips as his name came out as a half-whimper, half-moan; breaths becoming shallower. At this point, he would happily kill for the chance to slide inside of her like he had in his dream. Idea hitting him, his hand began to slide down her body as his lips brushed along her ear. He desired her immensely and yet watching her like this was satisfying in and of itself.
She let out a low cry when his hand slowly slid underneath her panties, his fingers gently brushing along her slit, not doing too much yet. He let out a shaky breath at the wet warmth because she was wet for him and that was just...
"Does it feel good, Hinata?" her response was to gasp as he tested the waters, his fingers pressing in lightly. He knew what he was doing thanks to that 'training' but it hadn't elicited nearly the same response he was feeling from watching her. Maybe it was because he had been rather unwilling – despite his body's reaction – then while he wanted to do this with her. She was beautiful, incredibly sexy, and his.
Both moaned when he took the risk and slid his fingers inside of her. She was so hot and wet and she was just too much. It was becoming increasingly difficult not to move his hips too much and risk jarring her awake. He moved slowly and gently even though it was agonizing. There was a small logical part of him that was saying he needed to stop because this was seriously wrong, but logic had nothing on horny and hormonal and was once again happily ignored.
He closed his eyes when she began to move against his hand and her back began to arch. Muscles clenched around his fingers as he increased his speed. Her eyes had fluttered open slightly but it was obvious that she was still somewhat out of it. That was fine; she was close and he wanted to take her over the edge. Had to, although he wasn't quite sure why – nor did he care at the moment.
"Hinata," he murmured, kissing her temple lightly. "Let go. I want to see you." There wasn't anything in the world he wanted to see more than that right now.
A loud gasp filled the air as she arched against him, his name escaping from the soft moans she made as she climaxed, body tensing. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen as he watched her in his haze and his body was screaming at him to take her now, but he held back.
He pulled away, still looking at her as she panted heavily, white eyes shifting to take in her boyfriend. The Uchiha could only imagine how he must look as he licked his fingers and practically undressed her with his eyes. She even tasted good and he shifted uncomfortably at the abrasive fabric of his loose pants against his erection. No, he had definitely never wanted anyone as much as he wanted her right now.
Mine.
"Sasuke-kun?" she asked, drowsy and sated but still confused. Smirking, he shifted so that he was half on top of her, lips moving over hers. Her arms instinctively wrapped around his neck and he moved his hips against her thigh, needing to feel her, needing the relief. She let out a startled sound and he pulled back.
"S-Sasuke-kun?" this time when she asked she looked more alarmed and slightly panicky; as if she wasn't sure of what was going on or if she was still dreaming. The panicked look slapped him back down to reality hard.
What...what the hell am I doing?
Jerking away from her, he got off the bed, head spinning. He felt heavily disoriented, confused, and he really needed to do something about his arousal before he continued to do something stupid. With that he stormed into the bathroom, locking the door and turning on the sink.
Splashing his burning face with cold water he looked at himself in the mirror. What stared back at him was unfamiliar.
What just happened?
Grunts and gasps filled the bathroom minutes later; one hand had a white knuckled grip on the counter as his back and head arched. His body actually shivered from the intense orgasm that ripped through him at his ministrations. Breathing ragged, he quickly cleaned, his mind whirling now that blood was finally returning to its rightful place.
Although he was extremely embarrassed by his behavior; he couldn't regret it. Even though he had no desire to leave the bathroom and face his girlfriend after what he had just done he had enjoyed doing it. Now that his head wasn't clouded with lust and he could think rationally again, he tried to figure out what he could possibly do to fix the damage he had just caused.
She'd probably feel as if he had tried to take advantage of her; which wasn't true. He hadn't tried to do anything; his brain had taken a vacation and he had been acting on his desires. It shouldn't have happened, he shouldn't have let himself get carried away, but he wouldn't mind a repeat performance either. Sasuke wasn't entirely sure how to feel about this and he wondered if maybe his brain was still addled.
I can't hide in here forever. He put his wet hands through his hair, sighing loudly. Why had he done that? Now that he was thinking straight it felt as if he could have stopped himself if he had wanted to, but it had been as if he had been drunk and high at the same time. Could he fix this? Would she think him a liar for what he had said last night in light of this morning?
"I won't leave you."
Gods, he hoped so. He had meant every word he had said last night.
Turning off the sink he opened the door to find her still in bed, hugging herself. Fear moved through him; she looked...upset.
"I'm..." she didn't look up at him and his chest felt hot and uncomfortable. "sorry." Looking away, he resisted the desire to sigh "You can use the bathroom here to take a shower; I won't come in again unless you tell me to." She continued to keep her gaze down at her lap and her face was very red. "Hinata, I wasn't trying to..." he cut himself off; there really wasn't anything he could say.
I can't believe I lost control like that. He wished he could regret it and feel guilty but he couldn't. He was upset that Hinata was upset, because he didn't want her to leave him for any reason, but that was it. "It...won't happen again."
When he reached the door to leave Hinata finally spoke up.
"I...it's...i-it's okay." When he turned to her he started. She looked highly embarrassed and nervous, but not angry. "I...um..." she looked away again, shy. "I'm not upset. I didn't...mind it." She whispered the last two words but he caught it, dark eyes widening with surprise.
For the first time, Sasuke actually felt that maybe she felt the same way he did; on all levels. Still, even he could see that intimacy wasn't something they needed in their relationship at the moment. They truthfully barely knew each other despite the strong pull they seemed to have towards one another.
Even though he was with her, he was still heavily confused and conflicted. It was maddening and at the same time it was actually...exhilarating. He felt alive again. She made him feel alive.
I...maybe I do...
"Go ahead and take a shower. I didn't see you with a bag but there's some clothes in there that should fit you decently for now. I'll make breakfast or something."
White eyes widened. "You can cook?" she was so amazed she had actually forgotten her embarrassment.
What a weird girl. He rolled his eyes "Yes, I can cook." He said with a smirk and walked out the room, giving her much needed privacy.