Chapter 11

A/N: New chapters will be, from now on, posted on SUNDAY MORNINGS because school is back and I don't want to post on weekdays. They'll be up really early, too, like close to seven in the morning, because I have to be at church by eight...

Sorry for the confusion; PLEASE REVIEW!! THREE REVIEWS OR NO UPDATE!!

"I - I don't, um, what do I, er, you, what are you...?" Azula pressed a shaking hand against her forehead and closed her flashing gold eyes, then shook her head slightly and opened them again. This wouldn't do. Surely one day in the Earth Kingdom hadn't reduced her to rambling like an idiot. Maybe she could just start over. Or run away... "Hello."

Azula knew she needed to say more than that. That wasn't enough. It was never enough. But she kept her mouth shut and fixed her eyes angrily on the silent figure in front of her. Why wasn't she saying anything?

The obviously bewildered woman moved slightly to one side and motioned for Azula to come in. Once the princess had crossed the threshold, the front door was closed quietly and the two speechless characters turned to face one another. Azula's mind raced for something to say. She couldn't just stand there. She shouldn't even have been there...

"Well, I must say I'm incredibly surprised to see that you've made it this long in such wretched conditions," stated the young firebender coldly. "I half expected you to give up and come home years ago. But I suppose some congratulations are in order; you've succeeded in evading your family for all this time, and I'm sure that by now it doesn't even bother you any more."

Ursa sighed softly and shook her head. "Azula, please don't. You don't understand; I -"

"Don't understand what? I understand everything," hissed Azula, fighting back the hysteria that was threatening her voice. "You always liked Zuko more than me. Everyone knows that. And you left me because of him; you wanted to protect him more than you wanted to be around for me."

"That's not true, Azula. I love you very much." Her voice was slow and soft, deceivingly comforting in a tone that had Azula doubting even her own intense anger.

"Perhaps. But you always loved him more..."

"Oh, Azula, you don't really think that. I've always loved you just as much as I love Zuko."

"That's not what Father says."

Azula saw her mother's hatred for Ozai flash across her shining golden eyes, but only for a second. After that, her expression reverted to its original calm, concrete composure. "Your father doesn't know what he's talking about."

"I doubt he'd lie to me." Or did she? Azula frowned as she realized she was defending the very man who had turned her away. Sold her into marriage to an Earth Kingdom prince for more troops; like he really needed more. And Ozai had torn her entire family apart. Split them in half. Ruined everything. Still, Ozai was the Fire Lord. And Ozai was her father. And just for those reasons, he had to be perfect, she supposed...

"Ozai lies to a lot of people, Azula."

"Maybe."

There was a short pause where Azula shifted her gaze to the floor, and then back up to steal a quick look around her. The house was small, but certainly not cramped. It was actually almost empty, aside from a few smiling pictures of infants who Azula assumed were Zuko and herself, and one slightly tattered Fire Nation flag hung on a wall in the shadows under the stairwell. Azula found the space slightly depressing, all lonely and empty and dark. Maybe everyone's houses looked like this; she couldn't remember anyone's but her own, which was also dark and gloomy. Although it was very far from being empty.

The idea slowly dawned on her that she was supposed to be saying something; Ursa probably wanted to know what her detested daughter was doing at her house. Straightening her back and looking aloofly into her mother's troubled eyes, Azula informed authoritatively, "I need somewhere to stay for the night. I'm on my way back to the Fire Nation, and I'd rather not travel during the night. At least not in this awful town. Which reminds me; I must request that the Fire Lord destroy it once I've arrived back home. This place is unbearable."

"You can stay here," offered Ursa fondly. "But why are you even in the Earth Kingdom? And why are you all alone?"

"I..." Did she really want to say that Ozai had given her away? Probably not. That would only prove that her mother was right to hate the slightly deranged man, and Azula didn't want that at all. "I just thought I'd check up on the new governor. Mai's father just got the job. And I thought I might enjoy a change of scenery for a little while." That, Azula realized with a frown, was one of the worst lies she'd ever told. The Earth Kingdom was really beginning to take its toll on her.

"Uh huh...well, if you're sure...you can still stay here." Ursa led the princess up the winding stairs to a bedroom which, besides being slightly musty, was in good order. Azula smiled weakly and thanked her, then quietly shut the door and leaned against it. Something didn't feel right. She'd lied to her mother thousands of times, usually concerning Zuko, but this time it was different. She wanted to tell her the truth. She wanted to think that someone would side with her, and Ursa had an uncanny ability to switch sides in an argument seamlessly, without anyone really noticing that she was contradicting herself.

It occurred to her that she could go find Ursa and tell her why she was really in the Earth Kingdom; recruit at least one person to defend her position. But that would be extremely awkward. Asking her mother for help. She'd never done it before, and she wasn't sure she wanted to start now. But, there was a first time for everything...

Azula quietly turned the doorknob and crept out of her room, looking nervously to her left and then her right. The staircase was at one side, and a disquietingly dark hallway was at her other. With baited breath, she tip-toed down the hallway, paying close and cynical attention to the immense collection of pictures covering the walls. She stopped to take a closer look at some of them, expecting to see Zuko's tiny round face smiling up at her from every one. It wasn't, though.

For every one picture of Zuko, there were two of Azula. And Azula found this odd. Zuko was the favorite child; at least from her mother's point of view. And next to Zuko, Azula had always been lost in the shadows of obscurity that her mother had forced her into. She took a deep breath and ran a finger across the edge of one picture frame, smiling in an odd, half-smirking fashion as she looked regretfully at the picture. Her own tiny frame was perched precariously on the edge of the turtle-duck pond, and one arm was outstretched, offering a huge piece of bread to the soft, quacking creatures in front of her.

Azula could remember that day. She'd wanted more than anything to feed the ducks; Zuko always got to and it was finally her turn. But she'd broken the bread unevenly, and the pieces were too big. The ducks wouldn't take them. In a display of her easily-ignited anger, Azula had thrown the bread at the ducks, and that was the last time any of them went anywhere near her. Oh, how Zuko had laughed. The turtle-ducks would always love him. And so would Ursa. Ursa could love anyone; anyone but Azula.

Unfamiliar jealously welled up behind the princess's golden eyes and she wrenched the picture from its place on the faded wall, smashing it to the floor and smiling tempestuously as she watched the glass shatter across the cold wooden floor. That would be the last time those stupid turtle-ducks ever tore her mother away from her.

A/N: I can only imagine how surprised you all must've been when I found a way to bring Ursa into this story...lol but not really. It was probably really obvious. Sorry I'm so obsessed. :)

Read appa-appa-away's stories My Blutara and Ahoy! The Zutara Drabble Series. They rock. Need I say more? And read Miss TearChan's one-shot The Missing Piece of the Puzzle. I really like that story and it's super easy to read; she's a pretty new writer and could use the encouragement so please R&R! You know what it was like to be new here. ;)

And then read my story Keeper of the Sun which is being forced into an undeserved and incredibly early grave by (guess who) all of you. That story NEEDS reviews. I hate that it's doing so poorly; next to Cut Apart the Moon and maybe even this story, it's really sucking it up. That's making me pretty upset. PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOU lol READ THAT STORY. Just give it a chance. It's cool. I swear. I've worked sooooooo hard on it. And no one's reading!! Just...please...

sigh...ok then...PLEASE REVIEW. Sorry for nagging. I'm so annoying...