Castiel watched Dean as his hunter turned off the music and tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. They were cruising back towards the motel in the impala, but they were still more than an hour away. The angel could have flown them back, but Dean had wanted to drive. And Cas kind of liked watching Dean drive. The hunter let his guard down in a way that he often didn't and the angel liked seeing the human in his natural state.

After a few minutes, Dean looked over at Cas and licked at his lower lip. "Cas… do you think I should have told Sam about us sooner?" Cas debated for an answer, but Dean looked away and continued before he could have spoken. "I told Sam no more lies, so, by not telling him, I'm being a hypocrite. But on some level, it's none of his business what I do."

Cas didn't really know what to say to that. "I… didn't tell my older brothers either, and it wouldn't have mattered, except…"

"Yeah?"

The angel took an unnecessary deep breath. "I'm an archangel. The seventh archangel. I didn't remember until Aziraphale made me remember that Raphael didn't kill me, and I don't know if it was their intention to make me remember that last bit, but… I was a fledgling archangel when heaven fell apart."

Dean glanced back towards his angel and Castiel wasn't sure exactly what he saw in his expression, except a moment later Dean steered the car to the side of the road, put her in park, and turned off the ignition. "Okay…" he said. And he didn't sound angry, or frustrated, just curious and like he was trying to wrap his mind around it. "You're an archangel, then."

Castiel nodded and they sat quietly for a few more minutes. The archangel wondering how Dean was going to react to this revelation, and the human sitting and contemplating it. He fidgeted.

Dean sighed. "When we were hunting the Trickster the first time around, he seemed to embody instant gratification. And I know I haven't been around him enough to understand his real personality, him or any of the other archangels, but… as often as you say I am perfect just the way I am, you still deserve so much more than me."

"Dean, the relationship between us is not defined by the standards you are trying to adhere to. I am happy with everything you're willing to give. And if you decide you don't want to have sex, ever, it's okay. I like this, and all I want is for you to be happy."

The hunter looked back at Cas. "I don't want to take sex off the table, I just…" He paused, trying to figure out how to say what he wanted when he didn't have all the words for what he felt. "I'm sorry, Cas, it's just… I'm not ready." He had to look away, the emotions too strong to continue looking any longer. "I want to be able to, and I feel horrible that I'm forcing you to wait on me."

A moment passed, and there was a sigh from Castiel. "Dean, you are not forcing me to do anything, regardless of what the subject is. I am more than satisfied with anything you are willing and able to give me, no matter what it is. If you wish for us to be nothing more than we are now, then I will be more than happy with what you give me. And if you wish for us to take that step, whether now, or years into the future, I will be more than willing to wait for as long as you need, as long as it is something that you truly desire, and not something you are forcing yourself into before you are ready, simply because you think that it is something that is required." A hand drifted across the space between them, reaching to hold his gently.

"Cas, I…"

He risked a glance back at the angel, and froze. The soft, loving smile upon Castiel's face was breathtaking, and he couldn't look away for even a moment. He was so lost in his lover's smile, that he almost missed the next words that were spoken.

"It's alright Dean. I swear to you, there is nothing that could cause me to leave you, especially if it is something in relation to a physical relationship."

"But…" Dean swallowed. They'd talked about this before, so why did he feel like he needed validation? But he had to say it, had to hear it. "Even if… even if I'm never ready?"

The angel- archangel- leaned forward, pressing soft lips to Dean's forehead. "Dean, I love you, and regardless of whether or not we ever have sex, that's not going to change how I feel. It's not about the sex, okay? I like the emotional bond between us, and I'm not going to pressure you to try to do something you aren't ready for, okay?"

Dean closed his eyes, inhaling the scent that was all Cas. "I don't deserve you," he mumbled. "Why are you so perfect?"

There was a moment of silence, but then there was a sigh from Cas. "How is it that you still do not believe yourself worthy, even after everything I have done to show you?"

Dean sighed as well, shrugging as he fought not to pull away. "I don't know, Cas. You know that I don't know, hell you probably know better than me that I don't know."

Castiel sighed again, before pressing another kiss to the top of Dean's head. "One of these days, I will show you just how worthy you are of love."

Lucifer was alone for the first time since he'd shown up at the Elysium hotel and he wasn't sure he liked it. Of course it would stand to reason that he couldn't stay at his mate's side constantly, but that didn't mean he didn't want to.

The mate bond was two strands of pink and red light braided around his and Michael's graces, and the fact that it was giving off a strong healthy glow brighter than he'd seen it yet was the only reason he wasn't in the middle of a meltdown.

The fact that it was there at all meant that Michael held no doubts as to the fact that he wanted this. Lucifer knew that with a certainty he had never been able to hold for anything else. The cage could mimic things he wanted, but it couldn't fake this mate bond.

And the nightmare had only brought to light that there was one more thing he wanted more than anything else for this to be complete, and it wasn't the love of an abusive parent.

Wanting to have a baby might have seemed like an odd desire for a being like Lucifer, but Lucifer wanted the opportunity to raise a beautiful new life with his beloved mate. This wasn't about the symbolism of a baby bringing them closer together, a myth which more often than not only further destroyed already strangled mortal marriages.

But a baby also wasn't going to be the metaphorical last straw on the metaphorical camel's back. Mate bonding didn't work like that. Unlike humanity and their misplaced goals and desires, angelic mate bonds weren't worn down by the tests of time. Angelkind bonded for life. And the mate bond wouldn't form if there were certain things between the individuals that suggested they weren't compatible.

It took a lot more than a false hope of never being separated for a bond mate to form. That wasn't even the frosting on the cake. He loved Mikha. And his desire to stay with his mate for the rest of their immortal lives was an honest one, because before all the cage stuff, he'd known that Mikha loved him too, and he still did, even if Lucifer couldn't quite comprehend why. But the why didn't matter, because the one thing that mattered the most was the bond mate pulsing pleasantly through his grace.

And the baby that he wanted to raise with Mikha… They mattered too. They mattered too and he had to go find Rafa right now because he didn't even know if biology allowed for him and Mikha to carry a baby, and he had to know.

Lucifer headed towards where he thought Raphael would be. His younger brother had mentioned something about wanting to look for another library in the building Michael had chosen for their nest. Lucifer wasn't sure what the abandoned building had been used for, couldn't remember it having ever been used, not even when he'd been a small fledgling. But if it hadn't been used at some point, it wouldn't have existed, right?

Before Lucifer could make it back, he ran into his twin. They weren't identical twins, not like Raphael and Aziraphale, but there had been a time when his sibling bond with Samael had been really strong.

"Heylel!" the black winged archangel said, embracing Lucifer before Lucifer could react.

"Samael," Lucifer whispered, returning his twin's hug with arms and wings. "I'm so glad you've come back."

"It's good to be home," the archangel who was both Crowley and Samael, replied. "So you and Mikha finally tied the knot, hmm?"

"Yeah… It was too long a time coming." Lucifer pulled back so that he could get a better look at his twin. "But what's this between you and Azi? I'd have never seen that coming."

"Humans are so fragile and short lived. Azi was the only Being I got to see time and again, century after century, so it shouldn't come as a surprise that we ended up forging a relationship." Crowley smirked. "Besides, I like him."

"I never would have guessed you could stand him."

Crowley shifted his head, intending to stare at Lucifer in disapproval because his twin wasn't really wasn't as funny as he liked to think he was. But he stopped, because if there was one thing he also knew how to do, it was using humor as a defense mechanism. Hadn't he used it for a few thousand years to hide his feelings for Azi? "Heylel, please talk to me. Do I need to go find a shovel?"

"What?! No, that's not necessary, there's nothing wrong! Or at least, nothing that you could fix with a shovel. Or a sharp object. It's just," he sighed, taking a deep breath to try and figure out how to explain all the emotions he was feeling, and what they all meant. "I really want to have a baby. With Mikha. And I don't even know if that's possible, and I don't want to bring it up in case I can't."

Crowley nodded. "If you're not going to talk to Mikha about it yet, you'd be a lot better off talking to Raphael, and finding out for sure. I don't know about you and Mikha, but Azi and I have had plenty of unprotected sex without either of us getting pregnant, but it's hard to say how much the fact that we tend to both prefer male forms, we don't want children, and were on Earth, impacted that. It's possible that any of those factors kept us from having any children, or it may be something neither of us would consider."

Lucifer nodded. He hoped he wouldn't have to go find a female vessel, Mikha liked this one. But he would, if that's what it took. He was going to have this child, one way or another. But Crowley wasn't finished speaking yet.

"But what do I know," Crowley said. "I'm not a healer, I didn't even remember I was an archangel until the other day. Go talk to Raphael."

"Alright. See you later?" When Crowley nodded, Lucifer continued on his way.

Lucifer eventually found Raphael in a small room on a different floor from where Michael had built the big nest. The bed, easily big enough for him and Michael, but not really for anyone else, took up most of the room.

"Hey, Raph," he said, pushing the door open. "Can I ask you a few questions?"

Raphael turned around. "Sure, I guess. I was testing some warding I found, I think you and Michael should be safe here."

"You didn't ward the nest first, so we can all be safe?"

"These spells aren't designed for a big space, I'll have to keep looking, but I thought this was better than nothing. And you and Michael can have nice alone time without being in danger."

"You'd do that for us?"

Raphael sighed. "You and Mikha are adults, and do adult things, and regardless of my feelings about certain adult acts, I wanted the two of you to have a safe place in this building that was yours, just for the two of you."

Lucifer tilted his head. "Thank you," he said. He thought about the way Raphael had phrased his answer.

But before Lucifer could figure out how to phrase a question about that, Raphael added, "You said there was something you wanted to ask?"

"Yeah…" Lucifer paused, gathering his thoughts. "I want to know about biology. I want to have a baby with Mikha, but not necessarily create a nephil."

Raphael turned away from Lucifer, knowing he wouldn't be able to hide a wince and not wanting to let his brother see it. There was nothing wrong with fledglings or how they were created, (as long as it was consensual, of course) but the archangel of healing didn't like thinking about sex, and while he could sometimes pretend they weren't having sex, this was a little too prominent to easily ignore. He swallowed, trying to keep his breathing calm. It was only biology. That was it. Just biology. "I'm not familiar with any cases of angels reproducing amongst themselves, but I do know that it's possible. But similar to how we have to get permission from our vessels, all the beings involved have to actively want said child."

"And even though Mikha and I are both in male vessels, it'll still work?"

Raphael gave Lucifer a look similar to one of Sam Winchester's patented bitch faces. "What do you think? I just said that I don't know, so why do you think I would know? Why are you asking me and not talking to Mikha? If he doesn't want a baby, you're not going to have a baby."

"Raph-"

Lucifer paused, taking the time to look at his brother, and really take in all the details of what was happening. Something about the situation was causing intense discomfort in Raphael, but what was the triggering point? Was it the talk of a fledgling, causing fear after whatever it was that had kept Samandriel from growing as he should have? Was it just from the thought of his brothers partaking in those kinds of relations, the same as humans seemed to back away from discussions of those topics within their families? Or was it something more…. Sinister?

He couldn't remember Raphael acting anywhere near this harshly towards these types of questions before he had been locked away, and it was rather concerning. He didn't want to think that anything had happened, either towards Raphael or anyone that would have been close to him, but it was slowly becoming more and more of a possibility. Especially since Raphael had been so quick to grow agitated at the questions, when such a thing hardly ever happened, even when one was asking the most inane of questions.

He needed to know what was happening, and why. Taking a breath, he spoke, keeping his voice low to attempt to keep from spooking his brother. "Raph, what happened? I know you, and I know how to tell that something is bothering you. And this is absolutely something that's bothering you, and I'm not the only one who's noticed. I know I'm not."

Watching as Raphael's shoulders tensed, Lucifer waited, wanting to see what his brother would do. It was obvious to see that he was very uncomfortable, with the tenseness in his shoulders spreading to his wings, and further through his body. But somehow, his face showed no sign of the turmoil that was clearly flooding through him. It suddenly made sense how he had been able to hide the discomfort. None of the signs showed through his face, where most would focus. Every single sign was in the rest of his body, which could all easily be explained away as being the result of something else.

Even now, Raphael was looking away, and turning to return to one of the books that lay open nearby.

"There's nothing wrong, Lucifer. I'm busy and have more things to do today than to sit around and talk. There are numerous things that the infirmary need, both in regards to supplies and discussions to be had with healers and patients alike. And beyond that, there are nearly countless items that were uncovered in this wing, and if the rest of our brothers are busy either with their mate or finding their mate, then that leaves me to sort through it all."

More than able to read a dismissal, Lucifer sighed, before turning to walk out of the room. He paused in the doorway though, watching his brother as he began to fuss with various details of the room. But he knew that there was nothing more that could be done. Not on his own, and not so soon after he had clearly been told to leave Raphael alone.

And so he left the room, wishing that there was more that could be done. He wanted Mikha, he wanted to talk with his mate and other siblings about his concerns, but he still didn't want to return to the large nest, especially if it remained as empty as it was when he had left. He wanted to be with someone, anyone, to sit and hold someone, and be held in return, but where were his brothers?

He wandered through the halls that made up the wing of heaven where Michael had made their nest, hoping to come across one of the others before he had to venture into any of the main portions of heaven. While his presence in the place he had once called his home was enough to show that he meant no harm to any within, he still hadn't really been anywhere beyond the hidden wing, and the single visit to the infirmary so soon after they had arrived, and was uncertain as to how any of the others would respond should they find him alone.

But he didn't have to worry for long, as Samandriel turned the corner to walk down the same hall as him, the fledgling's face lighting up in a dazzling smile as he ran to hug Lucifer, who knelt down to embrace the small being.

"Lulel! I was trying to find you, but I couldn't remember where the nest was, and I couldn't find Rafa, and I got lost, but I found you!"

Shaking his head at the fledgling, Lucifer adjusted his grip to be able to stand while he held onto the small body. "And why were you looking for me, Little One? I'm not as fun as Gabriel to play with, and I'll have you know that I'm not as good at healing any bumps as Raphael." With a grin, he continued. "Unless you want to know how to trick Gabriel, which I can absolutely teach you how to do. After all, I taught him everything that he knows, and there's still plenty that I never taught him." He paused for a moment, raising an eyebrow as he looked down at Samandriel. "And where did that little name you called me come from?"

The fledgling giggled, reaching to run careful hands through Lucifer's feathers. "I know your name is Heylel, but they also call you Lucifer, and I wanted to call you both, but I can't just say two different names, so I wanted to try and put them together, so I can call you both but only have to say one thing." He looked down, not looking Lucifer in the face as he continued. "Is that ok?"

Somewhere deep inside Lucifer, something melted, and all kinds of warm fuzzy feelings flooded through him. Gently lifting Samandriel's chin so the fledgling would look at him, he smiled. "That is more than acceptable." Pressing a soft kiss to the top of the fledgling's head, he began walking in the direction of the nest. It wouldn't be so bad in there as long as he had the fledgling with him. "Now then, can you tell me what had you looking for me?"

Samandriel giggled again, a soft pink dusting his cheeks at the kiss. But the giggles soon faded, a slight pout replacing the pure joy from mere moments before. "Wanted to snuggle with Rafa, but Rafa is being weird, and I didn't wanna bother him, so I tried finding Mikha, but he was busy, and so was Gabby and Azi and the other Sami, so I wanted to find you and snuggle with you, because everyone is too busy."

Shaking his head indulgently, Lucifer sighed gently. "Well that's not very nice of them. But you're in luck, do you know why?"

Samandriel tilted his head, frowning in confusion. "Why?"

"Because I'm more than happy to snuggle with someone, especially if it's with my favorite fledgling."

There was a tiny gasp from Samandriel, as another soft blush colored his cheeks. "I'm your favorite?"

Somehow, something even deeper within Lucifer melted.

"How could you not be my favorite? Clearly, anyone who doesn't have one as adorable as you as their favorite needs to rethink their list of favorites."

With Samandriel giggling again, and Lucifer having reached the door to the nest, he smiled as he opened the door. "Now then, why don't we go lay in the nest, and groom those wings of yours? It looks like they haven't been groomed beyond the surface in a few days, and you could help me with my own wings, especially with my molt coming soon."

Samandriel paused, looking up at Lucifer with suspicion in his eyes. "No nap?"

With another soft sigh and shake of the head, Lucifer chuckled as he set the fledgling down on the soft bed. "No nap, unless you wish it. I promise."

"I fully agree! No naps! Naps are lame!" Gabriel chimed in, his head popping up from under the many blankets that he had buried himself under, preventing himself from being seen sooner.

Slightly shocked at his brother's sudden appearance, Lucifer adjusted quickly, shifting his approach towards the situation as a whole. "See? No naps here, just snuggles and grooming."

After a moment, Samandriel nodded, the grin from before returning as he climbed over blankets and pillows to snuggle close to Gabriel. As the fledgling started talking about his day to Gabriel, telling the archangel about the nickname he had created, Lucifer paused.

Samandriel was right. He did have two names that he was called by. Heylel, which the other archangels tended to use, as they were the ones that could remember the time when that name had been used before, and the happy times that had been, and Lucifer, which was used by many to mock, or cast some form of blame in his direction. It had not been the name he'd given himself, but rather a name that had been forced upon him to twist his reputation. Anymore, it was only something that was used if he was in an argument, similar to a human child being called by their full name when they were in trouble.

Yet it was the name that Raphael had used when he had addressed him.

Something clearly wasn't right, and the situation was only growing worse by the day, with Raphael's anguish and change in attitude growing to the point of being noticed even by one as young and innocent as Samandriel.

Looking towards Gabriel, Lucifer made sure that he had his brother's full attention. "We need to talk with the others. Something is happening with Raphael." His words were quiet, and in a form of Enochian that was known only to the archangels and the eldest of angels, a dialect that was far too old for Samandriel to know.

Gabriel nodded softly, turning his attention back towards the fledgling before he would notice that the attention had ever shifted in the first place.

The bare bones of a plan set in place, Lucifer turned to spend time with his brother and the fledgling their brother had taken in. They would need the others before they could start coming up with a way to approach Raphael, a task that would need to wait for the right moment regardless. But for the time being, they could relax, and take comfort in each other, and the innocence of the fledgling between them.