The boy has watched her from afar for so long. Since they were little. He had always liked her. He knew it. She knew it. All the kids could see it. Time went on, and the longing for her grew to courage. He asked if she would like to be his girlfriend. She accepted. He would never forget that first hug. He would never forget that first kiss out in the rain, after she had spent the night crying. He would never forget all the time they spent together. Soon though, she would. She would want to be with other boys. She began to leave him alone. And when he realized what was happening, he cried. He remembers it. In the bathtub, the razor. The blood. The towel over his wrist. Crying in the corner for hours, his tears mixing with his blood. She cheated. He did not know why. Never again would he speak to her. He could not feel anymore. Life was not as colorful as it had been. There was more black and white. Soon her own mother was killed. There he was again. He hadn't talked to her for years. And now, he was across the aisle from her, at her mother's funeral. She was crying. Her sister was crying. His mother was crying. The other people were crying. All around him he could see people crying. The only one that wasn't crying was him. He stared across the aisle as she looked back at him through her tears. Why did he feel nothing? He did not want to console her. He did not want to see her cry either. He didn't feel.

He had already done his crying.

"Kyon! It's time to wake up!"

I heard my sister's shouts muffled by my door as she ran down the hall. In a moment that door would swing open, I would be attacked, disturbing my deep sleep, and Shamisen would certainly be disappointed that he had to be awakened.

Sure enough, I heard the slam that was followed by my sister jumping on top of me. Luckily, I was already bracing for the hit.

"Kyon! Good morning! Shami! Good morning to you too!"

I opened my eyes as my sister took Shamisen up in her arms, gently carrying him for a change, as she leapt off the bed and barreled down the stairs. I slowly threw the sheet off of me. Sigh. Another day. Another day.

As I got dressed, I took a look at my phone to see if I had any messages. Hm. 1 new message. I stared at the chrome plastic casing. I could see my reflection. My hair was ruffled, but my face was relaxed. It was morning after all. I opened it up to see a text message from... Private Name.

"You are back in the world."

What?

I looked at the screen for a second. What the heck did that mean? Did I leave? It's too early in the morning to be thinking about some crap, it was probably just a mistake or something. I closed my phone and tossed it back on my dresser.

Breakfast was good. I sat munching on my toast, taking my time to absorb the peaceful morning. For some reason today, things felt very new. I looked at my sister as she beamed and sipped orange juice. I felt kind of content right now. Of course, I hadn't had to do anything yet, and sure, all my problems will come back once I head out the door to school. But these are the moments you cherish you know? The moments when you feel at ease with everything, even though you have to go about with something that makes you exhausted everyday. I would guess it's the feeling daredevils have right before they attempt to jump over 25 school buses or something like that. They wouldn't attempt something like that if they weren't already a little crazy, would they? I stared into the milk I was drinking as I was thinking. The silky liquid swirled about with my hands throughout the glass as I twirled it back and forth. I wonder what everyone else does during breakfast.

As I was leaving with my bag, I saw Shamisen sitting by the door, staring at me. What do you want? I can't take you with me. I can't feed you right now either. His look continued as I stepped out of the door. Before I closed it, I took one last glance at him. He hadn't moved, but still stared into my eyes. Sigh. What a strange cat.

As I rode my bike, I could see that the sun was out today. Good. We had had too much bad weather lately. I rode on the pavement, listening to the tread make humming noises as it glided across the hard surface. What would my day at school be like today? You can bet that it probably involves some boring lectures at school. Probably throw in a bad grade on a test, maybe add in some stupid Taniguchi, followed up by me falling asleep in the last period. Yeah, that's a pretty normal day. It only gets abnormal after the lessons end, and Brigade activities begin. I wonder what mood Haruhi will be in today. I hope she's in a good mood, so I don't have to listen to that windbag Koizumi explain anymore crap about closed spaces. Then again, Haruhi always makes me do pointless and menial tasks when she's in a good mood. Plus, she seems to always abuse Asahina-san when she's in a good mood too, and no good-hearted soul would ever want to see that. Well, let me rephrase that; would want Asahina-san to go through that.

I finally reached the hill I walk up so often to get to North High. The sun beat down on my back, much like it had on Meursault in that one book by that existential guy. It led him to shoot "an Arab". Sometimes I felt that I might do something like that, when the sun gets too hot, and I just can't stand it anymore.

I was glad that Taniguchi did not meet up with me on the hill. But I was doubly glad with the two people I did see. Tsuruya-san and Asahina-san. The two smiling sempais greeted me warmly as they walked up behind me.

"Heya Kyon!"

Tsuruya was in a good mood as always.

"I didn't know you guys walked up this hill to get to school."

Tsuruya-san's emerald locks swished about her face as her beauty queen smile emanated through the air, giving the sun a run for its money in the shining department. She laughed as she pointed back down the hill.

"We were staying at one of my relatives houses, it's closer to town."

Asahina-san cutely walked with her bag in both of her hands in front of her.

"Good morning Kyon-kun."

"Good morning Asahina-san."

I tried to smile my best as we continued up the hill. I could never match the smile of these two girls though, and Tsuruya-san was always smiling, so what difference does it make.

"Wow Kyon, you have to walk up this hill every day? Man, do I ever feel sorry for you! Nyoro!"

"Yeah."

I felt the sweat beginning to accumulate on my back and the sides of my face. I looked up toward the sky again. The sun was alone, no clouds in sight. Completely clear.

"Eh... umm... it's unusually hot today... isn't it?"

Asahina-san timidly tried to start a topic of conversation as her hand went up to her mouth, as if in a thinking pose. She still looked at the ground in front of her as she walked. Maybe she didn't want to trip. I was about to answer her, but Tsuruya-san interjected.

"Sure is! Our school really needs to get some air conditioners eh, nyoro? Hey, Mikuru-chan, doesn't the SOS Brigade have some kind of thing planned today?"

"EWh?! O-oh... y-yeah, we do. We are handing out popsicles with copies of our new DVD..."

Oh crap! I forgot about that! I was supposed to buy those popsicles and bring them to school! Darn, Haruhi's sure gonna ring my neck for that one. I guess I could get them quickly after school.

I could see Asahina-san shiver at the thought of even mentioning that DVD. It was the full "Revenge of Nagato Yuki" movie, in which Asahina-san was forced into even more embarrassment at the hands of Haruhi. Plus, as I'm sure Asahina-san realized, whenever the SOS Brigade must hand something out... well... guess who's going to be doing it, and what they are going to be wearing?

We finally reached the top of the hill, and school. I parted ways with the two cheerful seniors as I headed for the shoe lockers, and then class 2-5.

I greeted Kunikida as we both walked in at the same time. Although my warm smile to him was torn away the second I walked into class.

"Kyon! You idiot! You didn't forget, did you?"

Haruhi's brash face met me as I could see fire in her eyes. I tried to play dumb. Maybe that will soften the blow coming to me.

"U-uh... forget... what?"

Haruhi stared menacingly at me, her mouth half open, ready to pounce. She talked in a very low voice.

"The... popcicles... Kyon."

"O-oh... those... Umm..."

I tried to avoid her eyes but she continued to lean into me until her terrifying face was a couple feet away from mine.

"I... forgot..."

I felt a searing pain as my head suddenly flung to my right. I saw Haruhi's outstretched hand holding a thick book. She had hit me on the head with her Humanities textbooks.

"Stupid Kyon! I told you not to forget! Now you're going to delay our giveaway! You know you're going to have to go get those right after school, right?! And then hurry back here!"

I rubbed my head as I looked at her. Right right, I get it. Just let me sit in front of you in peace.

I headed over to my seat as both Haruhi and I sat down. Class was starting. I could feel her annoyed attitude washing over me as it was spilling through the air around her. Was she really depending on me that much? Why couldn't she have asked someone else to do it then?

Class proceeded like a normal, regular day. Every so often Haruhi would poke me in the back with her mechanical pencil and call me an idiot for forgetting, reminding me I had to go get them after school, and that I had "Better not forget!" Yeah, I think I had it after the fourth time.

As the chime for the end of school rung, Haruhi and I headed to the clubroom. I had to go there first because I couldn't be trusted to go get the popsicles myself, "I might forget." as Haruhi says.

Haruhi swung open the Literature club room door as I looked inside over her shoulder. There only came a negligible movement from the silent girl sitting in the corner as Nagato lifted her head to greet us, before she went back to reading her book. Haruhi tossed her bag on the table as I did the same. I walked in and dropped myself on a foldable chair. I might as well rest right now, I'm about to be sent on another "mission" of Haruhi's. I took a look at the alien humanoid interface quietly keeping cover in the corner. It was amazing that I had met Nagato. I was really glad, too. I always felt like if there was one person to depend on, it would be her. My mind traced back to the events in that December, when Nagato had changed the world. Why did you do that Nagato? Was it… what you really wanted?

As I was thinking this, the fairy of the SOS Brigade walked in with a look of worry on her face. Asahina-san stepped in through the door hesitantly, knowing what she was going to have to go through as she nervously said hello to everyone in the club room before heading to the tea kettle in the corner.

"Wait Mikuru. Guess what?"

Haruhi's eyes lit up as she asked Asahina-san this. Asahina-san's own eyes were filled with an equal amount of fear as she squeaked out,

"U-umm... wh-wh-what?"

Haruhi leapt out of the Brigade Commander chair.

"I got you a new outfit for today!"

She grabbed Asahina-san as her other hand revealed a paper shopping bag from under the table.

"Kyaa!"

Asahina-san's eyes clenched tightly shut as Haruhi started taking her sailor uniform off. Going against every one of my primal urges, I calmly stepped out of the clubroom. I didn't even get any tea yet, what a gyp.

As I closed the club room door behind me, muffling the screams of the two girls, I saw Koizumi come walking down the hall.

"Greetings Kyon."

"Hey Koizumi."

He took a look at me, a look at the door, and then turned back to me.

"New outfit?"

"Yep."

He set his bag down on the floor and stood next to me.

"So, how you feeling today Kyon?"

I looked at him with a suspicious look. Fine, a little annoyed because I have to go buy those popsicles I had forgotten about. Why do you ask?

"No reason. Things seem pretty normal, don't they?"

Yeah. Normal day. Normal crazy Haruhi. And normal stupid esper.

He ignored my comment and continued on smiling.

"Despite what you say, you really like it like this don't you Kyon? It's almost as if someone were to create a perfect reality for you, this would be it."

I glanced at him. I guess you could say that. But I'm not about to admit it. I just looked away from him and left his musing floating out in the thin air as I looked at the sun shining throughout the hallway windows.

"Okay! You can come in!"

I turned around quickly and opened the door, salivating at the thought of what this new costume for Asahina-san could be. My expectation were not only met, but exceeded, as my eyes caught the sight of furry cat ears as I looked into the room. There next to Haruhi, trying to hide her legs from Koizumi and I, was a kitty kat girl, Asahina-san. She had black furry kitty kat ears, as well as plastic fangs. She wore a sleeveless top that left little to the imagination, hugging her chest tightly, as well as gloves shaped like paws, complete with claws. Going lower, she was wearing almost nothing, just a bikini bottom the likes of which you'd see out on a beach in Europe or something. It all matched beautifully, and the color really accented Asahina-san's perfect long legs, as she was wearing nothing on her feet either. My face instantly went red as I stared at her. Koizumi smiled.

"What an interesting outfit."

I ignored Koizumi's pointless comment, and snapped back into protection mode.

"Haruhi! You can't make Asahina-san wear this! It's too embarrassing!"

Haruhi's face went from pride on her ability to choose costumes for others to annoyance at me again.

"You don't have any right to be making decisions Kyon, since you forgot the popsicles! Don't question your Brigade Chief! Now, I order you to get them at the grocery store down the hill. Since you can't be trusted to not goof off, Yuki will go with you!"

She pointed to the silent alien in the corner reading her book. Nagato looked up at Haruhi's finger after hearing her name. She then glanced at me, and then back down at the pages of her book.

Haruhi saw me just standing there staring at Asahina-san's legs. Her face went red with rage.

"Now!"

I jumped out of my trance and headed out the door. As I did, I heard Nagato's book close as she followed me.

Soon Nagato and I were walking down the hill together to go to the grocery store Haruhi had specified. She walked by my side, as Nagato had always done. I remembered the first time I walked with her. I had done it many times since then. When Nagato first told me she was an alien, I didn't believe it. It was much easier to believe Koizumi and Asahina-san, since they were not the first to say they were different. But Nagato was out there. I just thought she was some weird girl who could not separate her own childish desires and reality, so she thought she was an alien. You know, like those mental patients who think they are Michael Jackson or something?

The sun was blazing over head, as I took a peek at Nagato. Her face turned toward me and stared. She wasn't affected by this heat at all.

"Hey Nagato. Do you like popsicles?"

She just stared at my face. That was a stupid question anyway. We reached the front of the grocery store, as we both stepped on the mat that signaled to the electronic sliding glass doors that people needed to be let in. The wave of cool air from the air conditioning rushed over me as we both stepped inside. Hm, now where to?

"Aisle 6."

Nagato pointed to the left at the large sign with a painted 6 on it. I followed her over to the aisle with all the freezers. I decided to get the cheap popsicles that come in a big bag. It's not like anyone will care, they just want something cold. I carried two of the bags as Nagato followed me to the checkout. I paid the person working there, who gave us a weird look, and then headed back out into the sweltering heat again.

We walked back in the direction that we had come, but after about a block, Nagato stopped me.

"This way." She lightly pulled me off course. I followed her as we walked down the cross street for a couple of blocks. C'mon Nagato, these bags aren't too light. Just as I was about to tell Nagato to stop and ask what we were doing, the shape of a familiar building came out from behind the others. The tall roof blocked the sun and put us in the shade as Nagato looked up at the sign on the front.

Library.

We were standing on front of the library I had taken Nagato to during the first hunt for mysterious happenings in the city. Nagato turned around. It must have been only me, but her eyes seemed to soften a bit.

"Can we go in?"

Uh, I don't know. We probably should get back with these popsicles. Haruhi is going to be mad.

Nagato didn't move. She continued to look at me over her shoulder, the front of her body facing the entranceway to the library. I started to laugh.

"I guess we can go in for a bit Nagato..."

She turned her head back around and began to walk forward through he doors. I followed her, carrying my two bags of popsicles. I hope they would let me in with these things. I bet they don't want all their books to get sticky from popsicle syrup.

I followed Nagato to where I had sat before when we came the first time, the sofa over by the window. Nagato perused the bookcase near the sofa. I sat down on the soft cushions and tried to relax. The sun was draining me. Thank goodness I'm inside this cool library, sheltered. I looked around and studied the place. It was dark, as most libraries were, with a lot of mahogany. There were not many people here right now, there should probably be more for after a school day. I laid my head back on the sofa, and felt my eyes slowly start to close. I was so tired all the time. Exhaustion. All of this. My life was filled with it. I let the bags of popsicles fall from my hands onto the floor. I began to doze for a little while after that. I don't know when it was, but later, my eyes had opened. I saw no one else in the library. It was also slanted at an angle. I realized my head was the one slanted. I then realized my head was on a shoulder. I had fallen asleep onto someone's shoulder. My eyes went up as I looked at the face of the person who was providing my support. It was Nagato. She was intently reading a book she had picked out. I saw her eyes go up and down reading the lines. I looked down at the floor. The bags of popsicles weren't there. Now, there were just two plastic bags of popsicle syrup. The popsicles had melted. I lifted my head to look at Nagato's face.

"Nagato... what time is it?"

"7:48 PM."

What? How could you let me sleep? Haruhi is going to be furious! I jolted to a standing position and reached into my pocket, grasping the object inside. I pulled out my phone and flipped it open.

16 missed calls. I had set it on silent, so I didn't hear it. I went into the call log. Yep. All Haruhi. My duty calls.

"Nagato, we have to go."

Nagato didn't say anything but looked up from her book. She stared at me again. This time, I was able to look into her eyes. And I caught something. Something very different. I had mentioned her eyes seemed a bit softer. As I stared into Nagato's eyes right now, I picked up on an emotion. An emotion of... longing, of want. I had never envisioned Nagato wanting anything ever, except something to read. Her job was to observe. But her dark eyes were speaking to me. They were telling me that Nagato really wanted to stay. Her pupils danced, and spoke to me directly. She wanted me there too. I don't know why I thought this. But it just seems that way. Her stare continued, and I continued to look into her eyes.

I thought back to what I was thinking before. Why had Nagato changed the world before? Was she so unhappy with being an alien? She had said it was because of malfunctions or something. Maybe that's just a nice way of saying that she had been changing. Why is she not allowed to change? A feeling of sadness washed over me. This life wasn't fair to Nagato. Nagato was stuck in between existence, and mechanism. She was a human, but she wasn't. Every person anywhere is entitled to certain things in life. But for Nagato, those things would never happen. Would Nagato ever get to fall in love, or have a first kiss, or get married to the man she loves? I thought about Nakagawa as Nagato looked up for a second at the wooden panels on the walls around us in the library. Her eyes. Those eyes. I felt sorry. That this had to be how she was. She had no choice. At that moment, I began to want to see Nagato get another chance. I wanted to meet this Nagato, but not as an alien humanoid interface created by the Integrated Sentient Data Entity for the purpose of observing human life on earth as well as Suzumiya Haruhi. I wanted to see Nagato as a normal high school girl. I wanted to see Nagato's life progress like anyone else's would. I wanted her to enjoy life like we got to. I wanted Nagato… to feel what we got to feel. To feel the emotions of love for someone else. The most wonderful emotion there was. I didn't want Nagato to have to go through life without those things. Those things were important. I want Nagato… to be able to find love.

At this moment of looking at Nagato, I began to feel something different about her. If she were normal, and I had a normal existence, I would want to be with her. I would want to love Nagato. Even if Nagato acted the way she did now, it would be fine. But in my circumstances, I can't. And in hers, I'm sure she can't feel love anyway. At this moment, as I looked at Nagato, I wanted so bad to sit down with her and hug her, and hold her. I have no idea why, I just, wanted that to be the way it was. But I know it can't be that way, and I couldn't do anything like that.

Nagato. Let's stay for just a little longer.

I sat back down next to Nagato. I gazed at the melted popsicles. Didn't matter anymore anyway. Oh well. I looked around one last time, at the walls of books that surrounded me, the walls of things I would never know. I looked to my left at the girl sitting there. She had gone back to reading her book. Her short hair fluttered slightly as her eyes were focused on what they were doing. I turned back to look ahead, and then rested my head back on Nagato's shoulder, where it had been before. I closed my eyes slowly.

Nagato. I'm glad you are here. I'm sorry this is how it is. But for me, I'm really truly glad that I have you.

I heard a radio begin to play a familiar song. A violin song. I don't know why it was familiar. It just was. We sat there like that, in the harmony of the song. Just as I was drifting off to sleep, I heard Nagato's voice.

"Kyon-kun."

"What is it Nagato?" I said softly.

I lifted my head and turned it toward Nagato's face, looking into her eyes. Her face was soft, and emotionless. She suddenly went forward and wrapped her arms around me, her face right next to mine, her eyes closed tightly.

I heard her faint voice whisper out.

"…I do like popsicles."

End.